Friday, December 21
LECTURE: Manuel DeLanda at Eyebeam
Artist and philosopher DeLanda discusses his latest book, Philosophy and Simulation: the Emergence of Synthetic Reason (Bloomsbury) and the use of "genetic algorithms in architecture."
Eyebeam Art + Technology Center, 540 West 21st Street, (212) 937-6580. 6-8 p.m. Free.
MUSIC: Dum Dum Girls at Glasslands
Dum Dum Girls' leader Dee Dee is one of our great contemporary melodists, as was evident on last year's album Only In Dreams and should be even more clear when she plays a solo acoustic set tonight. Also unplugging is Dee Dee's husband, Brandon Welchez of Crocodiles.
Glasslands Gallery, 289 Kent Avenue, Brooklyn, (718) 599-1590. 8:30 p.m. $12. Tickets here.
FILM: The Garbage Pail Kids Movie at Nitehawk Cinema
The gross-out answer to the Cabbage Patch Kids proved so popular that they spawned their own feature film in 1987, and what a mildly disturbing, pseudo-musical it turned out to be. Starring Mackenzie Astin, who would later play Jimmy Steinway in The Last Days of Disco.
Nitehawk Cinema, 136 Metropolitan Avenue, Brooklyn, (718) 384-3980. 11:55 p.m. 97 minutes. $11.
FILM: Anatomy of a Murder at Anthology Film Archives
Equally treasured by law professors and film critics, Otto Preminger's 1959 courtroom drama stars James Stewart as the lawyer who must defend a man (Ben Gazzara) in the murder of his wife's rapist. The film features an original score by Duke Ellington (who also has a cameo). It screens this afternoon as part of Anthology Film's Gazzara retrospective.
Anthology Film Archives, 32 Second Avenue, (212) 505-5181. 3:30 p.m. 160 minutes, 35 mm. $10.
MUSIC: David Johansen at Bowery Electric
Between inspiring punk with the New York Dolls and punking lounge singers as Buster "Hot Hot Hot" Poindexter (not to mention his wild turn as the Ghost of Christmas Past in 1988's Scrooged), David Johansen released a string of underrated albums under his own name that showcase his outer-borough wit, broad melodies and bullfrog bluesman bellow. Expect songs from those and from the three 21st-century Dolls records as well as obscure R&B covers.
Bowery Electric, 327 Bowery, (212) 228-0228. 7 p.m. $25. Tickets here.
MUSIC: Joey Bada$$ at 285 Kent
Prodigious 17-year-old Brooklynite Joey Bada$$ drops multi-syllabic rhymes over boom-bap beats like it's 1995. He appears tonight with his crew, Pro Era (whose new mixtape drops Friday), including the new trio Super Helpful.
285 Kent Avenue, Brooklyn. 8 p.m. $12.
Sunday, December 23
SHOPPING: Brooklyn Craft Central Holiday Market
Really last-minute Christmas shoppers better get to Gowanus for this fair, which includes hot cocktails and pupusas as well as dozens of vendors.
Littlefield, 622 Degraw Street, Brooklyn. 11 a.m.-5 p.m.
ART: Inventing Abstraction at MoMA
This exhibition focuses on the new approach to artwork introduced a century ago by artists like Piet Mondrian and Kazimir Malevich. It includes not just paintings but books, sculpture, film, music and dance.
Museum of Modern Art, 11 West 53rd Street, (212) 708-9400. 10:30 a.m.-5:30 p.m. $25. Through April 15.
FILM: M*A*S*H at IFC
Robert Altman's 1970 farce stars Donald Sutherland, Elliott Gould and Tom Skerritt as Army surgeons three miles from the front lines in Korea. Winner of the Palme D'Or and a commercial blockbuster, the film launched Altman's career (as well as his partnership with Gould) and spawned a long-running TV spinoff.
IFC Center, 323 Sixth Avenue. 12 a.m. 116 minutes, 35 mm. $13.50.
PERFORMANCE: Bar d'O
Bar d'O has its place as one of the seminal all live drag cabaret shows in NYC's nightlife history. It's so beloved that the crew that was behind its conception, including legendary performers like Joey Arias, Sherry Vine, and Raven O, reunites every year to celebrate the show. For the 8th anniversary celebration this Sunday, Arias and Vine will again be taking over former Bar d'O owner Jean-Marc Houmard's intimately classic Indochine for an anything-goes evening of music, laughs and the kind of top notch scandalous entertainment that's harder and hard to find in the city.
PERFORMANCE: Bar d'O
Bar d'O has its place as one of the seminal all live drag cabaret shows in NYC's nightlife history. It's so beloved that the crew that was behind its conception, including legendary performers like Joey Arias, Sherry Vine, and Raven O, reunites every year to celebrate the show. For the 8th anniversary celebration this Sunday, Arias and Vine will again be taking over former Bar d'O owner Jean-Marc Houmard's intimately classic Indochine for an anything-goes evening of music, laughs and the kind of top notch scandalous entertainment that's harder and hard to find in the city.
$20. Indochine, on Lafayette. Sunday, December 23. 10 pm Reserve tickets: 212-505-5111
David Gregory serving Aunt-Linda-dancing-at-your-sister's-wedding-after-four-martinis realness. HELL YES, MS. SEXY GURL! Give it to us. [
Michael Stipe's gonna be raking in some sweet iTunes cash today. [
Hay, horse, hope you have plenty of apoca-oats in your foal out shelter. [
Behold, the buzzed buzzer: A party blower that only works when you're drunk. [
The crown jewel of ugly Christmas sweaters. [
Lay your weary head to rest on Cher's insane tweets. [
It was a dark and stormy night. 
Being a Broadway baby ourselves, we've collected some gift ideas that are perfect for those family members of yours who have Broadway chorus boys dancing in their heads. *Warning: just because it's obvious to you that your Glee-obsessed nephew is in the closet, that does not mean he's ready to come out in front of Grandpa, so please use discretion when leaving a Les Mis tote in his stocking.
Fiddler on the Roof music box. 
Once: A New Musical (Original Cast Recording). 
Little orphan Annie ornament: 
Phantom of the Opera and Christine 25 Yrs. figurine. 
Les Miserables "One Day More" tote bag. 
Broadway Tails by Bill Berloni. $19.95 at Theater Circle, 268 W
44th St., New York. This book by animal trainer Bill Berloni is for your
animal activist and Broadway lover friends. From Sandy in Annie (including the current Sandy on Broadway) to Bruiser in Legally Blonde,
Berloni rescues dogs and turns them into stars. In this updated version
of his 2008 book of the same name, he recounts funny tales of the many
tails he's saved and trained for a life on the stage, which includes his
search of shelters throughout America for the current Sandy in the 2012
revival of Annie. With a special forward by dog lover and Broadway legend Bernadette Peters!
Stressed? Please sit back, relax, and enjoy the GIFs of the week. [via 
This GIF is mesmerizing and I have no idea what it means or is. [via 
In other news, something was supposed to happen today that didn't happen. [via 
Whoa. [via 
This was one of the best fake things that happened in 2012. [via 
Chill, bro. [via 
I'm terrified of this penguin, too. [via 
And lastly, an inspirational moment... [via 
Peggy Noland out and about in L.A. from 
From 
Couple dancing while James Murphy DJs. From 
Patricia Field's rooftop BBQ was memorable. That scene is
club-kid-oriented, drag queen-oriented. Usually you only see these kinds of looks well after midnight.To be able to see those people outside, during
the day, on a sunny rooftop, is great. It's just a different setting. And
there were lots of hot dogs and wiener jokes.
Dancing at the Pussy Riot benefit. From 
Taxi driver with a pride flag. From 
Sensation party. From 
Refused on stage. From 
Dev Hynes. From 
Creative Time had a sandcastle building competition with artists in Rockaway Beach, and the
photos are so much more special now since that area was wiped out by Hurricane Sandy. One of the artists, Dustin Yellin, had his entire studio
devastated. A lot's changed since this took place. This was a happy
moment with the creative community and that area of the Rockaways
that's recently become a hot spot for the creative community. It was also cool to
see these art world big wigs just hanging out, mixing with the locals.
Tom Sachs, who is conceptually brilliant, decided to dig a hole to China
for his sandcastle. To
me, that was art happening in real time. It was conceptual, physical
and totally in the public eye. And then you have these local
children coming up to him and admonishing him for using a generator.
They were like, "That's cheating!" Seeing Tom Sachs get yelled at by 12-year-olds kind of levels the playing field. That was a fun day.
I found about Bronies through Andrew W.K. when I was doing an 
The 18 Java St. farewell party. From 
Fashion's
Night Out is always a crazy thing. This shot is a portrait of two girls I saw on the street who were all dressed up. To me, the most interesting thing about
Fashion's Night Out is just the physical hordes of people who come out
in the SoHo area. It gives people who are interested in this world a
shot to go to parties at boutiques or party with the designers, who don't
have a connections or know the right people. And, you know, it's also because a lot of stores are
giving away stuff. It's just a big, bizarre thing and the events get weirder and weirder every year. It's a spectacle on so many levels.
This shoot was a highlight of my year. Only a handful of photographers had
access backstage and most photographers just don't get that access.
You're really getting a behind-the-scenes look at Fashion Week. It was
also one of the shows that's just more over the top. Just in terms of
Betsey Johnson's style and that brand's style -- the colors, the
accessories, the frilliness. It's big. There were 100 looks. Most
fashion shows don't have that many looks, that many models. There's also
not usually
Lil' Kim posing for photographers. From 
Drag performance at Bushwig. From 
The scene inside Nightspa. From 
Prince Rama's workout session. From 
This was taken at a Malingering Uvula party at the Knockdown Center in Maspeth. The space itself is
stunning. I've never been anywhere like it in New York. You feel like you're in Berlin on the outskirts of
town. The fact that the people who own Knockdown Center are putting on interesting performance art and installations with basically no budget is really impressive. They don't have any funding for help with promotions and
the fact that they can make this stuff still happen and bring people out
there is impressive. It's only a 15-minute walk from the Jefferson L train stop, but it's a very
desolate area.
Inside Trip House. From 
Art
Basel was amazing this year. Villa Vecchia was a highlight of my year.
It was this beautiful estate -- who doesn't like beautiful estates? -- and
the Hole filled it with artwork. The Hole was promoting the artist Holton Rower's work pretty heavily in Miami this year. I liked the work just in the booth at the
fairs, but to see it installed in that setting was really cool. The
fact that they were having parties there as well was cool. It wasn't like
the stuck-up gallery crowd. It was more of the young, New York
avant-garde scene -- the people are
struggling to get there financially. Young artists and kids are shacking
up in roach-infested motels and putting on their craziest looks just to
go out every night and be a part of that scene. That's interesting to me.
From 
Primi Frutti Semi Sparkling Aromatized Wine Product in Peach ($6.49)
Sponge Bob Chia Pet ($19.99)
Slippers ($11.99)
Jack Nicklaus Lemonade ($1)
Harley Davidson Bag ($3.49)
Murray's Superior Hair Dressing Pomade ($3.99.) 
Taylor Swift Notebook ($3.99)
Vibrator ($14.99)
Wild Thing Pencil Pouch ($4.99) 
Bigelow teas ($3.19) 
Party Animal Dancing Pet Speaker ($24.99)
Arctic zone skateboarder lunch bag ($7.99)
Magician's Cereal Marshmallows (2 for $3)
Friendly Christmas unicorn. Price upon request.
Iron Skillet Cookie Gift Set (Chocolate Chip; $9.99)
"Dream Tones" Night Light & Sound Machine ($14.99)
Ornament ($1)
NyQuil 2 Pack (kinda a joke but it's also flu season!; $19.99)
Dog bone ($1)
Shimmer Glitter Tattoos (As Seen on TV; $9.99)
"Leg Lamp" Hanging Clip with Sound ($6.99)
Pretzel Party ($3.99)
Karaoke Machine ($49.99) + Slow Cooker ($8.99):
Sufjan Stevens wrapped up a month-long Christmas tour billed "The Surfjohn Stevens Christmas Sing-A-Long Seasonal Affective Disorder Yuletide Disaster Pageant On Ice," last night at Bowery Ballroom. Stevens opened the show by welcoming the audience "to the Christmas insanity," and, well, that's exactly what followed. Like his recent 59-track Christmas music box set Silver and Gold, Stevens' two-hour show was all over the place: The evening featured a mix of seasonal hits determined by a giant spinning game show-style wheel to the side of the stage, odd re-vampings of classics (including an awesome vocoder-assisted deconstruction of "Do You See What I See?"), confetti, and general Sufjanian whimsy and silliness. Stevens closed the set with his 13-minute "I'm the Christmas Unicorn," an ode to the "mythical mess" that is The Holidays, wearing a balloon costume and dancing on his piano while inflatable unicorns and Santa Clauses rained down from the balconies. At one point Stevens told a story about dreaming of "normal" Christmases when he was young, but instead his hippie parents gave him and his siblings satchels of healing crystals. But despite our best efforts, Christmas is rarely a normal experience for anyone and few seem to embrace that more than Stevens. 
Rosie Thomas, who performed in Stevens' Christmas band, opened the show with a stand-up set as her spazzy alter-ego 
I've eaten so many good meals this
year, and while some of them are a blur, a few dishes haunt my dreams. In no
particular order:
Barraged with cocktails all year long, many of the libations I sipped over the past 12 months have faded from memory, completely unremarkable. While a few were downright deplorable, a whole lot were delicious, some of which I've already featured in past 
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Kayvon Zand and Mr. Muthafuckin' Exquire in our "
Simon Doonan: "What are you wearing?"
"I was kind of aching to talk to anyone because I wasn't plugged into
technology. So I'd come back from the studio and I turned into that
lurky person, who's like, 'Hey, what're ya doin'? Wanna chitchat?'" 
"I have an almost unquenchable thirst to be the center of attention."
"My
generation, that's just what we're into...When we got home from school,
that's how we kept up with each other: AOL, Zynga, Angelfire, Napster,
shit like that...You'd be on there and you'd go to, like, sex.com!
You're mad obvious with it when you're a kid. You know how many times
they probably sold sex.com? It's like the go-to URL."
"My
immediate spark reaction was, oh my God, what are they doing
that?...Nooo -- no, don't do it. Why you gonna do it? Oh no, begone!"
"Feminists hate me for sure! I'm always like, 'I'll do anything for you!'"
"To this day we don't know why that happened. I was skeptical.
Everyone was skeptical...I signed up to go down in flames. It's like if
you don't do this, you wasn't made for this shit if you can't take on
something like that. So it was kind of a challenge. It was like, 'Fuck
it, let's go.'"
10. My DJ debut in Sagaponack for The Pace Gallery/Grey Area party.
Is there anything cuter than an over-the-hill DJ? This is my new side
career. I have already enrolled in Scratch DJ Academy's winter classes. See you on the dance floor. XOXO