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Dirty Windows and More Tonight in NYC

ART: Dirty Windows at Toomer Labzda 
The two Brooklyn painters in this show, Patrick Brennan and Jean-Baptiste Bernadet, create blurred, abstract fields whose viewing experience corresponds to the show's title. 
Toomer Labzda, 100a Forsyth Street. Opening reception tonight 6-8 p.m. Through January 27. 
Pictured: Jean-Baptiste Bernadet, Untitled (Grand Shuffleboard II), 2012.

PARTY: Hang Out! at Tammany Hall 
Max McFerren hosts (with artist Matthew Lutz-Kinoy) and deejays (with artist Grayson Revoir) this one-off party. Expect art-school kids and minimalist beats. 
Tammany Hall (basement), 152 Orchard Street. 10 p.m. Free. 

SHOPPING: Slow and Steady Wins the Race Sample Sale 
Ignore the name of Mary Ping's high-concept clothing line and make it to this four-day pop-up sample sale before they run out of already expensive goods discounted by half and more. 
334 Broome Street, 12-6 p.m. Through Saturday. 

She & Him's Animated Redo of "Baby, It's Cold Outside"


Zooey Deschanel and M. Ward released their A Very She & Him Christmas album last year, but bring it back to "animated" life with this clip for the holiday classic "Baby, It's Cold Outside." The song was written by Frank Loesser in 1944 and was originally performed as a duet with his wife. It's been covered numerous times since and, in fact, Deschanel sang it with Will Ferrell in the 2003 film Elf. The video was made by the London-based director Elliott Dear and his animation team.

Style Scraps: Tom Ford Is Doing An Old-Fashioned Runway Show Next Season

mmm-couture-300x450.jpgThe Chambre Syndicale announced that Maison Martin Margiela and Alexis Mabille can now officially make haute couture. [via WWD]  

darylk-stevenalan.jpgSteven Alan is collabortaing with downtown fixture Daryl K for Resort 2013. Expect leather leggins and sharp but casual tailoring. [via Press Release]  

romeo-becks.jpgAlexandra Shulman, EIC of British Vogue, reminded everyone that Romeo Beckham will not be on its cover any time soon, but can certainly be inside it, tweeting "Romeo Beckham doesn't meet Vogue model health initiative criteria of over 16's only [via The Cut]   

thumbs_sharon-stone-gomillion-leupold-amica-01-1.jpgA fiercely-bowed Sharon Stone covers the special 50th anniversary of Amica. [via Design Scene]

Chloe-Alice-1.jpgChloé is releasing this limited edition "Alice" bag in honor of a new store opening on Rue St. Honoré in Paris. [via High Snobette]

Tom Ford image (1).jpgTom Ford will present an on-schedule runway show (read: do a normal fashion show) during London Fashion Week in February! Here's hoping he'll allow photographers! [via WWD]

prada-women-spring-summer-2013-05.jpgHere's Prada's Steven Meisel-shot campaign for SS '13. Unlike the men's campaign, this one will only star models. [via Design Scene]

The iPad magazine POST made an interactive film in honor of the Comme des Garçons scent Amazingreen. The film is kaleidoscopic, trippy, and unsurprisingly very green. [via Selectism]

lauren-sherman1.jpgAfter half a year as Lucky's executive digital editor, Lauren Sherman will be returning to Fashionista as an editor-at-large. [via The Cut]

Where to Celebrate the End of the World

endoftheworldpartyWIP.gifIf the Mayans were right and it's all over on 12/21, you might as well greet the apocalypse in style. Below, thirteen recommendations for "end of the world" parties happening in NYC on Friday from fancy fêtes to Fucked Up and everything in between.

End of the World With Joey Arias at Joe's Pub
The legendary performance artist will help you forget about doomsday with his signature mix of raunchy humor and sultry cabaret stylings (here's hoping Billie Holiday-as-done-by-Joey Arias will make an appearance in the act). He'll be joined for the night by music director Thomas Bartlett (a.k.a. Doveman), the Pixie Harlots, theremin player Cornelius Loy and performance artist Narcissister. (And, before you go, be sure to check out Arias' Apocalypse To-Do List!)
Joe's Pub, 425 Lafayette St.; 11:30 pm, Tickets are $25 and can be purchased HERE

End of the World Party at Gansevoort Park Rooftop
While you wait for the world to end atop the Gansevoort Park Hotel, keep an eye out for models getting their end days 'smize' on in a post-apocalypse-themed photo shoot.
Gansevoort Park Hotel, 420 Park Ave.; 7 pm - 11 pm, Free with RSVP

Mayan Apocalypse with Fucked Up at Warsaw
The Toronto-based hardcore band will not take the apocalypse sitting down and, if you catch their set at Warsaw, neither will you. They'll be headlining a bill that also includes assorted other bands of the indie (Lemuria), surfy (Night Birds), and post-punk (Parquet Courts) varieties.
261 Driggs Ave., Brooklyn; 7 pm, Tickets are $20 and can be purchased HERE

John Hodgman: That Is All at The Bell House
Lucky for us, The Bell House has added a second earlier set after the comedian's original show sold out so more folks can be treated to Hodgman's words of wisdom concerning "wine, wealth, sports and the end of the world." What's one of the most important things in his apocalypse survival kit? Mayonnaise. You'll have to head to The Bell House (or click on this link) to find out why.
The Bell House, 149 7th St., Brooklyn; 6:30 pm, Tickets are $15 and can be purchased HERE 

Apocalypse Party at Cameo Gallery
DJs and producers Joakim and Jacques Renault share a bill at the Williamsburg venue's 12/21/12 bash, guaranteeing you'll be dancing to a mix of electro, jazz, disco and dance music all night (or at least until the world blows up).  
Cameo Gallery, 93 N. 6th St., Brooklyn; midnight, Tickets are $15 and can be purchased HERE

Trash! End of the World Party at The Studio at Webster Hall
If they say that the decline of civilization is preceded by a period of decadence, then Trash! might be a pretty damn good way to go wild before the good times end. Dance your butt off amidst club kids and go-go dancers as you listen to DJs play a mix of New Wave, Britpop, rock, indie and dubstep. We hear there will also be a video premiere of some sort along with live cabaret performances by Penny Wren and Iris Spectre.
The Studio at Webster Hall, 125 E. 11th St.; 10 pm, Tickets are $5 with RSVP at iwannabetrash.com 

The Official End of the World at Shea Stadium
Perhaps hosting one of the only day-into-night affairs, Shea Stadium will kick things off at 3:30 pm with a champagne open bar followed by performances from Dada Trash Collage, Ashcan Orchestra, the Jazz Massagers, Video Program, Iceland's Kría Brekkan and Muck, Tonstartssbandht and Guardian Alien.
Shea Stadium, 20 Meadow St., Brooklyn; 3:30 pm, $8 cover 

End of the World Party at Beaumarchais
Make sure your party shoes are table dancing-friendly before heading to Beaumarchais to ring in the apocalypse because at this brasserie, that kind of behavior is not only tolerated but encouraged. Aside from guests two-stepping in between glassware, the resto's dinner party will include Mayan décor, costumes and lots of champagne. And, if we all make it through the night, they're welcoming everyone back Saturday morning with an "I Survived the Mayan Calendar" brunch.
Beaumarchais, 409 W. 13th St.; Make reservations at reservations@beaumarchaisny.com

Mayan Apocalypse 2012: The Last Rock Show on Earth at The Knitting Factory
It's a bold claim to bill your show as the "Last Rock Show on Earth" but that's exactly what The Knitting Factory is doing, offering a raucous line-up that includes Vajra, Starbolt 9, Autodrone and Ani Called Alpha. If you want to have one last wail, there aren't many choices better than this.
Knitting Factory, 361 Metropolitan Ave., Brooklyn; 11:55 pm, Tickets are $12 and can be purchased HERE

"It's the End of the World" by Queens Artists' Resource Collective at Gottscheer Hall
Manhattan and Brooklyn don't have monopolies on end of the world parties. Quarc (or Queens Artists' Resource Collective) will be throwing down at a historic German banquet hall in Ridgewood, promising live music, karaoke, German food, free cupcakes and drink specials to aid and abet your apocalyptic hedonism.
Gottscheer Hall, 657 Fairview Ave., Ridgewood, Queens; 8 pm, Free 

Holiday Party/Apocalypse Party with Prince Rama at 285 Kent
On the heels of their new album titled Top Ten Hits Of The End Of The World, it's fitting that psychedelic two-piece outfit Prince Rama will headline 285 Kent's apocalypse-cum-holiday party, which also features sets by Dickpic (that would be DJ Dog Dick and Pictureplane) and Ami Dang.
285 Kent, 285 Kent, Brooklyn; 8 pm, Tickets are $8 at the door

End of the World Party at Hudson Terrace
Expect that the crowd at Hudson Terrace's bash will be dressed to impress...their maker (or whomever or whatever greets us once the world is destroyed). There'll be ample booze and music all night to keep you satiated while you wait for everything to end.
Hudson Terrace, 621 W. 46th St.; 11 pm, Free 

MEN at Brooklyn Night Bazaar -- Apoca 'Lips'
Bust Magazine has curated the night's music line-up at the penultimate day of the Brooklyn Night Bazaar, tapping JD Samson's band, MEN, to headline on the occasion of their 300th concert ever. While you party with Samson, also check out all the goodies on sale (you know, just in case we all survive and you're in need of some last minute xmas gifts...), art installations and food from Roberta's, Luke's Lobster, Asia Dog and more.
Brooklyn Night Bazaar, 45 N. 5th St., Brooklyn; 6 pm, Free  

The Top 15 Celebrity Bulges of 2012

2012 was the year of the celebrity bulge. From Jon Hamm's near-constant wardrobe malfunctions to David Beckham's full-frontal underwear ads, lots of stars left little to the imagination. Below, our definitive list of celebrity bulges of 2012, ranked in descending order.

15. Thom Evans 
We barely know who Thom Evans is -- a former rugby star, as it turns out -- or what he does now, but that doesn't stop us from appreciating his physique on the cover of Attitude magazine.  

Screen shot 2012-12-17 at 2.50.40 AM.png
14. Henry Cavill as Superman 
 We're pretty sure that Henry Cavill is wearing a cup of some sort, but still: he can be our Man of Steel any day.  

img_9637ready-cmyk.jpg13. Kris Humphries 
Kris Humphries isn't really our cup of tea -- he seems like kind of a dick. And speaking of dick, Humphries' underwear spread in West East magazine isn't too shabby.  

12. David Beckham 
On the one hand, David Beckham is fucking hot. On the other hand, we've seen Beckham's body many, many times at this point and there's something a tad sterile about these ads, so we're not feeling it as much as we maybe would in, say, 2010.  

11. Matthew Morrison 
This one might be a bit of -- ahem -- a stretch. But we've always had a slightly embarrassing crush on Matthew Morrison and we're, how shall we say...happy to see this?  

10. Andy Samberg 
Andy Samberg is a cute dude. Though we may prefer him playing Ras Trent or being an utter dork in "I Just Had Sex," we like seeing all he has to offer in this skimpy cheerleading outfit from the set of Grown Ups 2.  



9. Milo Ventimiglia 
Sadly, this is the only bulge-related GIF in this post! As the folks at World of Wonder so aptly put it, the only reason to see the train-wreck that is Adam Sandler's That's My Boy is Milo Ventimiglia hopping around in his skivvies. And thanks to us, now you don't have to see it.  

8. Mark Whalberg

We're used to seeing Marky Mark's funky bunch from his Calvin Klein days, but here he is looking much bigger, in every sense, for his film upcoming film Pain and Gain.

7. Andrew Garfield as Spiderman
Believe it or not, Andrew Garfield and the costume designers tried hard to make sure his naughty bits weren't the main focus when he put on the Spidey suit. That's kind of a shame, but at least they didn't go 100% 'Ken Doll' with it. He gets a big bump up from Cavill's Superman because that looks like the real thing and supposedly he really was butt booty naked under his suit. (Side note: he apparently laughed and blushed when asked about this which only makes us like him more.) 

6. Shemar Moore 
Shemar Moore, known for his role on the procedural drama Criminal Minds, apparently loves going to Miami and romping in his bathing suit. To quote Emma Stone's character in Crazy, Stupid, Love.: "F***! Seriously? It's like you're Photoshopped!"  


5. Olly Murs 
Confession: we didn't know who Olly Murs was before a few weeks ago. He's big in the UK -- he has several No. 1 hits -- but seems to be widely known packing trouser heat. When asked about his bulge, he straight up told SugarScape that it's 13cm long (or just above 5"). We dig the honesty.  

zac-efron-paperboy.jpg4. Zac Efron 
The Paperboy was by all accounts a very strange movie. Zac Efron, who hadn't really managed to shake his "buttoned-up tweeny Disney star" aura, strays from that squeaky clean image in a big way. Oh, and did we mention that he spends a whole lot of the movie in various states of undress?  

magic-mike.jpg3. Everyone in Magic Mike
Magic Mike was absolutely this year's go-to movie for watching scantily clad men wiggle their barely-covered junk. The Times even lauded it for turning the tables and celebrating the female gaze. So behold: Matthew McConaughey, Channing Tatum, Alex Pettyfer and Matt Bomer.  

jon-hamm-bulge-1.jpg2. Jon Hamm 
The one, the only. Jon Hamm isn't the only one who made the bulge high profile in 2012, but we would argue that he did more for it than any single person. The different situations in which he 'accidentally' bared all -- in suits on the red carpet, casually hanging around NYC -- and the sheer number of times (about a million) that we saw Jon's pants ham mean two things: that he needs more supportive underwear, and that he probably ran out of fucks to give. Gold stars all around.  

1. Everyone in the Olympics
In our humble opinion, the Olympics has to take the cake for #1 groin-watching-influencer in 2012. The swimmers and divers just standing around (case-in-point, Ryan Lochte and Tom Daley), the entire French Olympic swimming team posing for an underwear ad, the debated maybe-erection of US rower Henrik Hummel, the sexting trysts of US gymast Danell Leyva, and the general strut of Swedish decathlon runner Björn Barrefors are just the tip of the penis-shaped iceberg. More than any event, the Olympics gave us ample bulge to gawk at, and made male package skyrocket to the front and center of the airwaves and our general peen-obsessed consciousness.  

Eight Items or Less: Spider Self-Portraits...

1. "A spider that builds elaborate, fake spiders and hangs them in its web has been discovered in the Peruvian Amazon." [Wired; photo by Phil Torres]

2. José Parlá unveils his latest 70-foot-long, site-specific mural, "Diary of Brooklyn," inside Barclays Center (620 Atlantic Avenue, Brooklyn) on January 9. [Photo by David X Prutting/BFAnyc.com]

3. Here's the trailer for the upcoming James Franco and Travis Mathews film Interior. Leather Bar. The pic -- previously titled 40 Minutes -- is now scheduled for a screening at Sundance in January.

4. "Mingle and sniff with Santa Paws" at Animal Fair's eighth annual "Toys For Dogs" holiday benefit tonight, December 19, 6:30 to 8:30, at Amnesia (609 West 29th Street).

5. The question of who owns the copyright to a tattoo is back with another lawsuit. Unlike the dispute over the copy of Mike Tyson's tattoo used in The Hangover Part 2 -- and settled out of court -- this one involves the image of a lion on the torso of a mixed martial arts fighter, the tattoo artist and a video game company.

6. Photo of the day: Guess what number sold out first.


7. Jason Schwartzman will make a cameo on Parks and Recreation as the owner of Pawnee's sole video store. See our list of ten most-wanted Parks & Rec guest appearances here. [HuffPo; Photo by David X Prutting/BFAnyc.com]

PREMIERE: Total Warr's New Video "Where Is My Mind" (Pixies Cover)


If you've never heard of French duo Total Warr, here's a few reasons why you should put them on your radars:

1) They were inspired to write and record their first EP, Cascades, after a trip to Euro Disney with their respective girlfriends.
2) Their names are Kiki and Guigui.
3) They have a delightful photo stream on Facebook that almost exclusively shows photos of the two of them being silly together.


total-warr-cascades-ep.jpg4) This was the cover art for their aforementioned Euro Disney-inspired EP, Cascades.

Aside from these slightly peripheral reasons, however, the main reason you should check out the band is for their complex -- yet pop-friendly -- soundscapes. Layering clusters of synths, drum machines and assorted other noises -- including the robotic bleeps and whirs currently in vogue along with more ambiguous sounds like the crunching of potato chips or popcorn -- with catchy lyrical hooks, Total Warr's music can be favorably compared to bands like Delorean,Yeasayer, MGMT and Animal Collective. We're pleased to announce that the band will return with their fourth EP, Loisy, out January 29. The three-track disc includes a song featuring guest vocals by The Death Set's Johnny Siera and a cover of the Pixies' "Where Is My Mind."

The dudes have released a music video for the latter track, which we're excited to exclusively premiere above. The clip features the duo jamming in a basement -- and switching hairdos -- as the room gradually turns into a full-blown rager complete with a DIY Daft Punk look-alike. "The party scene was shot during a real party with all our friends, and I promise this isn't fake," Kiki told us. "My apartment was a TOTAL mess after the party!" After trolling your Facebook, we believe you, Kiki.

Check out the video above.

Gift-Guide: Cheapest Designer Swag Edition

With the holidays just around the corner it's time to do some serious gift shopping. Unfortunately, luxury goods can cost a pretty penny (millions and millions of pennies) but lucky for you, we hit up all of the classiest designer stores in town. Inspired by a story in our first-ever December issue back in 1986, we bring you the least expensive items from these high-end labels. 

Tiffany's Sterling Silver Chain
You can essentially put any faux-silver piece of jewelry in an old Tiffany box and it will have everyone fooled but if you really want to get someone authentic Tiffany jewelry your best (and cheapest) bet is their 18 inch, sterling silver chain which comes in at around $50

Prada's Credit Card Holder
The least expensive item Prada carries in stores is their credit card holder, which comes in black, cameo, red and geranium pink. The holder comes in at $150 which is certainly not cheap but that doesn't matter because it's Praaaada.

Barneys' Shiseido Sharpener
For only $5, this Shiseido lip and eye pencil sharpener can be yours, all yours! Though it's small, remember that it's from Barneys New York, that place that sells actually expensive designer things that we will never be fancy enough to afford.

Cartier's De Lune Perfume
FL017037_0_cartier_fragrances.pngIf you have any one on your shopping list who wants to smell like moonlight, this 15 fluid oz. bottle of this classic Cartier scent will cost around $80. Leave it to Cartier to bottle a graceful "moonlit night." Impressive or just IMPOSSIBLE? Seriously though, that's physically impossible.
Chanel's Le Vernis Nail Color
_6761499.jpegChanel has to be all god damn Français and call their nail polish "le vernis." A bottle of this polish, er, we mean le vernis, costs around $28 and comes in colors such as a nude "Ballerina" and a hot pink "Rose Exuberante." 

Lanvin's Alber Sketch Pencils
This set of sketch pencils designed by Alber Elbaz is adorable and comes in at $25. A high-fashion writing utensil rivals any $800 belt you could buy someone, right? RIGHT?!

Gucci's Fragrances
A 30 ml. bottle of one of Gucci's fragrances such as "Gucci by Gucci", "Premiere", and their classic "Eau de Parfum II" will cost in the range of $60-$65. You know what they say: if you can't buy your loved ones Gucci, buy them the smell of Gucci. It's the same exact thing.

Louis Vuitton Bandeaus
Screen shot 2012-12-11 at 1.49.10 PM.pngThe least expensive items sold at Louis Vuitton are the bandeaus which come in a variety of prints. We prefer the multi-colored monogrammed one which screams, "I'm a fun and colorful person who wants everyone to know I bought this at Louis Vuitton!" You can nab one of these for your friends for $155.

Fendi's Fan di Fendi Body Lotion
Screen shot 2012-12-11 at 1.53.00 PM.png
Do you have a Fendi fan in your life? So much so that they want to literally rub their fandom all over themselves? You're in luck because a 5 oz. bottle of Fendi's Fan di Fendi lotion is only $44.

Hermès Wash Cloth
Screen shot 2012-12-19 at 1.52.54 PM.png
This wash cloth from Hermès is only $45 and is made of "100 % combed cotton." Not sure what that means, put it probably feels real, real nice.

Screen shot 2012-12-19 at 2.03.50 PM.pngPucci Handkerchief
Pucci's $90 handkerchief is perfect for the chic allergy sufferer in your life.

Dior Vernis by Dior
Screen shot 2012-12-11 at 12.07.45 PM.pngThese polishes cost around $21-$23 and come in a variety of colors like a deep plum "Poison" or "Blazing Pink." Give the gift of Dior nails! They would look great with a Dior bracelet or maybe even a Dior dress, but we can't always get what we want (because we're poor.)


cheapsmallluxyury.jpgSEE ALSO:
Insta-Gift Guide
50 Gifts Under $100
Foodie Call: 22 Yummy Gifts

Witness the Fitness: A Jogging Tour of Bushwick

Artist Alaina Stamatis has long dazzled us with her daft wordplay and contextual cleverness (as in the horoscope section of Showpaper) as well as her astute, deadpan live executions (like Evil Yoga). So we were psyched for yesterday's "Witness the Fitness" (subtitle: "1-Day Alaina Stamatis Gym Membership for a Runner's Higher Understanding") billed as a "historically-jarring jogging tour of Bushwick with some singing, lead by a violently panting Alaina Stamatis." The tour was centered at a new Bushwick gallery that opened in October called Fitness. Not all of their shows are fitness-related, but Stamatis's event was part of a two-week series called "Daytime Programming: Marathon Performances," a "long-form dare to local performance artists to be more athletic" organized by the gallery and featuring a different artist each day.

When we arrived at the gallery for the scheduled tour, several people were hanging out, including children of various ages who turned out to be the heirs to the neighboring flower shop. The gallery featured an installation of pennant strings, Xeroxed maps and photos, assorted books, Gatorade, custom-printed M&Ms, and a YouTube karaoke setup (this is what drew the youngsters, who were amazing at Ke$ha).

Soon, it was time for action, and a camouflage-clad Stamatis, as promised, led a small group of followers on an insightful tour by the decades through Bushwick's past. Collectively we jogged, listened, and stopped for stretch-breaks. One guy rolled a cigarette. A girl tripped on broken glass. Cars honked, pedestrians seemed confused.

Fact-filled stops included Brewers' Row (where 14 breweries operated in a 14-block area, c. 1890), the Opera House Lofts, the Mr. Kiwi Deli (where we ventured into the basement to hunt relics from a previous business venture), the Market Hotel (named for a So So Glos song, but in the late 19th century a real hotel), the All Eyes On Egypt bookstore (many sordid revelations here), and finally, the Cedar Street House.

Back at home base, the event concluded with a "cool-down lap" of Pernod and a performance by Stamatis's band The Jazz Massagers, a spoken-word jazz ensemble and witty project in its own right, as curious onlookers peered in through the storefront window.




The "Marathon Performance" series continues at Fitness through December 23rd.

Morning Funnies: Cosette Whoopi

Screen shot 2012-12-19 at 3.07.12 PM.png
How delightful is this photo of Obama pretended he got blasted with lil' Spider-Man's web? [Buzzfeed via Jezebel]

hollywoodheightchart_640.pngClick to enlarge image
For your viewing pleasure, here's a handy Hollywood height chart -- who knew that Robert Downey Jr. and Javier Bardem are both only 5' 7"? [Next Movie via Vulture]

whoopilesmiz.jpegBet you didn't know Whoopi had a cameo in Les Miz. [Thanks Alex!]

tumblr_mf6bl9EAKt1r6gwmko1_500.jpg"Hi crayfish, what did you think of the movie Lincoln?" [via Coin Farts]

tumblr_mf96mzRh6F1qcd8y7o1_500.jpgEven Freddy Krueger needs love too. [via Fuck Yeah Dementia]

tumblr_mesnuhUR2W1qzc4vgo1_500.jpgBut if you just leave 'em there, you'll start tearin' up my heart. [via Afternoon Snooze Button]

Screen shot 2012-12-19 at 5.50.28 PM.pngThe Miss Universe pageant aired last night, and an American contestant won for the first time in 15 years! In other news, Miss Venezuela -- in case you hadn't noticed -- has a real thing for chocolate. [via Shift]

Screen shot 2012-12-19 at 6.07.56 PM.pngIn case you've been wondering what Chicago Bulls legend Scottie Pippen has been up to lately, here's an update: 1) He made an appearance in A Christmas Carol (as part of a Make-A-Wish gift) and 2) He's set to star in a new reality show with his wife called -- wait for it -- Big Pippen. Awesome. [via TMZ and VIBE]

Screen shot 2012-12-20 at 7.57.16 AM.pngThis season, adorn your holiday gifts with some festive Ikea Monkey wrapping paper. Prepare for your grandma to give you a confused look when you have to explain to her that it's not a photo of Curious George. [via Twitter]

Screen shot 2012-12-20 at 8.03.40 AM.pngDon't you wonder what Big Boi and Martha talked about? [via Pop Dust]

Meet Tony Lepore, also known as the Providence Dancing Cop. As someone who has personally witnessed Tony in action, his traffic directing-dance routine is both deeply weird and incredibly awesome. [via Hyper Vocal]

Screen shot 2012-12-20 at 8.17.35 AM.pngThis Alexander Skarsgård holiday card is too much for words. [Reddit via Uproxx]

Nutcracker: Rated R and More Tonight in NYC

DANCE: The Nutcracker: Rated R at (le) poisson rouge
Do you sometimes imagine essential ballet The Nutcracker by way of a seedy burlesque show? Perhaps a Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy choreographed by Bob Fosse? Look no further than Angela Harriell's Nutcracker: Rated R, presented by David F. Slone and The Love Show. In this adult take on the childhood classic, young Claudia goes through a wondrous journey in a sex and drug fueled New York fantasy land. A nice change of pace from a night at the ballet?
(le) poisson rouge, 158 Bleecker Street, (212) 505-3474. 11 p.m. $20-30. Tickets here.

PARTY: Armageddin' Down at DL
Since winning a PAPER nightlife award for "Best Party," GBH's weekly "Cheeky Bastard" has moved from the Hiro Ballroom to this Lower East Side clubstaurant. Tonight's installment features cheap drinks and free music by in-your-face electro duo Designer Drugs.
DL, 95 Delancey Street. 10 p.m. Free with RSVP here.

MUSIC: "See You Tomorrow" at Paper Box
The Superior Bugout hosts an evening of music from (among others) Brooklyn noisemakers Guardian Alien, Japanther and Unstoppable Death Machines and video from (among others) Nicholas Chatfield-Taylor, Chelsea Ragan and Vincent Skeltis.
The Paper Box, 17 Meadow Street, Brooklyn, (718) 383-3815. 9 p.m. $5. Tickets here.

The Strypes Cover Bo Diddley


Somebody once said that if you can remember the 1960s, you weren't there. True, but that hasn't stopped young bands like the Strypes from recreating the sound and the look of that era. Here, the four Irish lads go back to the raw r&b of Bo Diddley with a cover of his 1962 hit "You Can't Judge a Book By the Cover" -- also covered on a demo recording in the same year by the Rolling Stones. Will the Strypes be doing a 50th Anniversary Tour in 2062?

The Prettiest-Pretty Beauty Gift Guide In All of the Land

Just in case the world does not end tomorrow night, you might want to be prepared for Christmas with some gifts for your family members. And beauty items are some of the easiest last-minute gifts you can sweep up in between holiday parties. Just think of yourself as the fairy godmother of good looks.

For your nail-biting mother (but it's just because she cares, honey!)


butter LONDON Holiday Glitter Trio Set 2 nail polishes. $36 at butterlondon.com. OPI Pure Lacquer Nail Apps in Shaken Not Stirred. $12. Visit opi.com for retailers. Topshop Princess Metallic Set nail trio. $28 at topshop.com

For your friend who follows every fragrance launch
_MG_0163.jpgSephora Fragrance Sampler for Her. $50 at sephora.com. Marc Jacobs Lola limited-edition velvet eau de parfum spray. $68 at marcjacobs.com. Fresh Fragrance Essentials Rollerball Trio.  $36 at fresh.com

For your spa-regular sister-in-law

_MG_0145.jpgL'occitane Hand Indulgences. $28 at usa.loccitane.com. Bliss Best in Glow skin care set.  $75 at beautybar.com. Lush shower gel in Ponche. $18.95 for 8.8 fl. oz. at lushusa.com

For your product-particular boyfriend

_MG_0151.jpgOribe Dry Texturizing spray.  $19.50 for 2.2 fl. oz. Visit oribe.com for retailers. PATCH NYC x Soap and Paper Factory of New York collaboration candle. $37 at patchnyc.com. Tom Ford Noir eau de parfum spray. $90 for 1.7 fl. oz. at bloomingdales.com

For your label-obsessed co-worker

face kit in Sinfully Chic. $70 exclusively at shop.nordstrom.com. Gucci Première eau de parfum spray. $87 at gucci.com. Dolce & Gabbana classic cream lipstick in Desert. $34 at saksfifthavenue.com

For the mall-rat Millennial

_MG_0088.jpgUrban Decay eyeshadow palette in Feminine. $36 at urbandecay.com. Hello Kitty Wild Thing Roller Girl fragrance.  $22 at sephora.com. Katy Perry lashes by eylure in Cool Kitty.  $6.99 at ulta.com

For your au naturel niece

Urban Decay Naked Basics eyeshadow palette. $27 at macys.com. Jane lip collection in Natural. $9.99 at janecosmetics.com. Make Up For Ever All Eyes On You set. $59 at sephora.com

For your messy-haired cousin


Sebastian Professional travel size Potion 9. $9.95. Visit sebastianprofessional.com for retailers. Shu Uemura Essence Absolue Oil-in-Cream. $45 at shuuemuraartofhair-usa.com. Bumble and bumble Stylist Editions 4-piece set. $48 at bumbleandbumble.com

Ok, The Great Gatsby Looks Pretty Good


We were on the fence about the new Baz Luhrman re-make of The Great Gatsby back in May, but based on this preview it looks like it's going to be pretty awesome. And never mind that it was supposed to come out next week but was pushed back to summer, as well as the fact that Leonardo DiCaprio's fancy-man gilded era accent sounds like if His Girl Friday was set in  Southie. That doesn't matter! We're sold on the costumes and party scenes alone. Plus, we're secretly pleased that DiCaprio, despite looking perpetually 20, is finally too old to play younger versions of his characters in flashback scenes. Mwhahaha!

The Great Gatsby is out May 10th.

Style Scraps: The World's Oldest Bra + Richard Haines for Prada


first-bra.jpgArcheologists found what they believe to be the world's oldest bra (pictured above) in an Austrian castle, created between 1390 and 1485. That pushes the earliest date for this kind of underwear back about 500 years. And FYI, these very old bras are referred to as "breastbags."[via Jezebel]  

minki-cheng.jpgWe love this "doomsday collection" from Central Saint Martins grad Minki Cheng. Cheng used waterproof, heat-proof and radiation-proof fabrics, and the clothes feature plastic fur, translucent scales and all manner of crazy things. [via Dezeen]  

prada-haines-tee-08-630x424.jpgFashion illustrator Richard Haines will be illustrating a limited-edition line of t-shirts for Prada! [via Fashionista]  

See Joan Smalls visit Laura Jane Grace -- the trans rocker and lead singer of punk band Against Me! -- for House of Style 2.0. We love her dialogue with Smalls and would kill for her old Dead Kennedys t-shirt. [via The Cut]  

marni-021.JPGRenzo Russo, chief of Diesel, bought a majority stake in Marni and hopes to increase its sales dramatically without overturning the company. [via WWD]  

Love the newest installment of Model Files, the satiric reality show which follows casting director "Preston" as he does his fashion thing. See the models get in the holiday spirit and generally get weirded out. [via VFILES]  

jvdf.jpgAt this point most of us have noticed the "Cash Rules Everything Around Me" in the East Village. JvdF has collaborated with Faust, maker of said mural, on a new line of iPhone cases which feature the cynical catch phrase. The cases are hand-graffitied and all profits will be donated to Hurricane Sandy relief efforts. [via Press Release]  

a-kind-of-guise.jpgGerman label A Kind of Guise exposed a batch of denim to any and all weather conditions at a nearby lake for 90 days before making them into denim shirts. We want all of them! [via Selectism]  

Billy Eichner Judges Celebrity Renditions of Les Miz Classics


Ahead of the
Les Misérables premiere on Christmas Day, we've recruited comedian Billy Eichner -- whose quiz show Billy on the Street recently launched its second season on Fuse -- to watch clips of celebrities like Jason Segel, Neil Patrick Harris and Katie Holmes singing renditions of "On My Own," "Confrontation," and "I Dreamed a Dream" and rate their performances. Below, find out whom he thought probably "begged producers to let him sing" and who played Eponine like she "just got dumped at the University of Michigan."

David Wain and Paul Rudd sing "Confrontation."

I love these guys. This is actually from the Judd Apatow version of Les Mis, which is set at the Farmer's Market in Brentwood. Instead of political uprisings and the plight of the poor, it's about how annoying it is to turn 40.

Lea Michele sings "On My Own."

Lea Michele has a great voice and I like her interpretation because it feels like Eponine just got dumped at the University of Michigan.

Susan Boyle sings "I Dreamed a Dream" at her first Britain's Got Talent audition.

In lieu of watching this again, I would just like to say that the woman who originally sang this song in the UK, Patti LuPone, looks a tiny bit like Abraham Lincoln.

Neil Patrick Harris and Jason Segel sing "Confrontation" on The Megan Mullally Show

Few people know this but "I Dreamed A Dream" is actually about Megan Mullally's talk show. She looks really comfortable here. It's amazing the makers of Les Miserables only need three hours to tell their story but the makers of How I Met Your Mother need nine years.

Aretha Franklin sings "I Dreamed a Dream" at Bill Clinton's inauguration in 1993.

You know who else had dreams? The 17 sables that died to make her coat! Is she on the Shahs of Sunset? Also, Edward James Olmos.

Katie Holmes as Joey Potter sings "On My Own" on Dawson's Creek.

I never knew Dawson's Creek featured a special guest appearance by Jennifer Tilly's character in Bullets Over Broadway.

Debbie Gibson sings "On My Own"

She actually sounds really good. Plus she's the first Eponine to have her clothing provided by Century 21. Let's face it -- without Debbie Gibson there would be no Lea Michele and without Lea Michele there would be no wars. [Ed. note: Also check out Gibson singing "On My Own" on the Geraldo Rivera Show in 1993!]

georgecostanzalesmiz.pngJason Alexander as George Costanza sings "Master of the House" on Seinfeld.
Note: embedding has been disabled but you can click HERE to watch the clip.

You KNOW Jason Alexander begged the producers to let him sing that and is proud of it to this day and talks about it if you let him corner you at a party but you shouldn't let him do that to you and ruin your night. Also, I like this scene because he's decided to use a scene on Seinfeld and act as if he's in Glengarry Glen Ross.

Actress Rosamund Pike Is Ready For Action

rosamunde_pike_dec2012.jpgRosamund Pike wonders what it would take to live off the grid. Like the title character in her new film, Jack Reacher, starring Tom Cruise, and adapted from the monumentally bestselling series by British author Lee Child, Pike finds an appeal in slipping out of modern, hectic, networked, over-scheduled everyday life, taking to the road with only a toothbrush in hand. The British actress gave birth to a son, Solo Uniacke, earlier this year, and she ponders, "If I wanted my son to be off the grid, what age do you have to start thinking about it?"

Fortunately for us, Pike and (the fittingly named) Solo haven't gone down the toothbrush-only path forged by Reacher, the enigmatic, stoic Lone Ranger and former military police investigator. Pike is decidedly on the grid, calling from London, her home and where she's currently doing stunt rehearsals for her next project, The World's End, from Edgar Wright of Shaun of the Dead fame. (She laughs as she says costar Simon Pegg urged her to mention that he "is the most awesome actor of his generation.")

Pike studied intensely for her role as Helen Rodin in Jack Reacher, delving into the complex world created by Child and the director, Christopher McQuarrie. Rodin is a young defense lawyer at odds with her powerful district attorney father, played by Richard Jenkins. She teams up with Cruise's Reacher to uncover an assassin who has killed several people in the middle of a city. To prepare, Pike read the famous Scopes trial lawyer Clarence Darrow's work and spent time with a female defense attorney. Her goal was to upend the clichéd woman-lawyer role that always looks "very polished." Pike wanted Rodin to be rough around the edges, to be struggling. As she says, "[Rodin] is a lawyer who's not fully in control."

If Rodin represents the law, Reacher represents vigilantism. His moral compass runs true, but only to himself. As Pike describes him, "He's a funny combination of being a very moral man and a very violent man." For Rodin, Reacher "is a conundrum. She calls herself a pacifist but starts to respect the brutality of this man." As the film progresses, "Reacher makes her think in completely fresh ways."

While Rodin and Reacher must work together in action-packed situations, there's no overt romantic plot. Pike says, "There's a lot of chemistry between our characters. It's like you're watching a relationship but the plot keeps getting in the way." She compares it to Alfred Hitchcock films where "you want to see the man and woman interacting and you don't even care if they get it on or not. You want to see them in the same room, that chemistry."

Rodin is a new type of role for Pike. American audiences were first introduced to her as Miranda Frost in the 2002 Bond film, Die Another Day, starring Pierce Brosnan as 007. From there, she went on to star in a panoply of prestigious British films, playing archetypal British roles such as Jane to Keira Knightley's Elizabeth in the 2005 adaptation of Pride and Prejudice, and she landed a delicious part in An Education which was written by the popular British novelist Nick Hornby. Next year she will team up again with both Brosnan and Hornby for a small role in the film A Long Way Down, based on another Hornby novel.

In some ways, her role in Jack Reacher, a quintessentially American production (likely to spawn a mega-franchise) mirrors her role as a Bond girl, that quintessentially British series. But it's very much a reflection, not a continuation on the same path, as she notes her role in Jack Reacher is "So different from Bond because the Bond woman is always a fantasy creation. You go to Bond for the glamour, for the fantasy." But with Child's world, she says, "women are allowed to get flustered. They operate in a real way." Rodin is a fully drawn character: "You know her. She might be a friend." Despite her effortless beauty, Pike also has the warmth and thoughtfulness of someone who very much could be a friend -- that is, your very smart friend who went to Oxford (Pike is an alumna) and reads Clarence Darrow.

The film was shot in Pittsburgh, and Pike fell in love with the city, which she says is "very cinematic and looks very cool in the movie" (avoiding the trap that her fellow blond Brit, Sienna Miller, fell into after she insulted the town while filming The Mysteries of Pittsburgh). Pike refined her American accent there, and feels this film "is in some ways the first movie where I felt fluent in American." She would get up in the middle of the night to check out the car-chase sequences, watching Cruise drive a black and red Chevelle. There's nothing much more American than that.

Rosamund wears a suit by Viktor & Rolf and blouse by Antonio Berardi.

Stylist: Hew Hood / Hair: Tina Outen at Streeter / Makeup: Florrie White at D+V Management using Chanel / Location: St Martin's Lane Hotel

Eight Items or Less: Get Your Donkey Cheese

1) Donkey cheese is apparently the world's most expensive cheese at $600 a pound and has a "musty-fusty" flavor. (NYT, photo by Moose G. on Flickr)

2) Last week, Scion opened a group exhibition and charity sale out in LA called "The Gift Show." Tons of people contributed -- including Mark Mothersbaugh, Mishka, Blek Le Rat, SSUR, David Choe, RZA and Steve Aoki -- and all proceeds go to Sandy relief efforts. Stop by and pick up a last minute gift at SCION AV Installation (7667 Melrose Avenue, Los Angeles). It's open until January 5. 

3) A Chicago jailbird used his "aspirations to be a clothing designer and ability to sew anything" to "fashion a lengthy rope, made from bedsheets" and escaped from the Metropolitan Correction Center on Tuesday. (Chicago Sun-Times, via The World's Best Ever) 

4) Madeon and The Knocks (DJ set) with Alex English and rekLES at Webster Hall (125 East 11th Street) next Friday. December 28. Advance tickets are here

5) On January 8th, The New Museum (235 Bowery) opens a new exhibition by four emerging artists called "Walking Drifting Dragging." All the works "document their travels within highly personal terms that blend cartography with memory." The artists are Eunji Cho (Seoul), Ellie Ga (New York), Paulo Nazareth (Belo Horizonte, Brazil), and Mriganka Madhukaillya and Sonal Jain of Desire Machine Collective (Guwahati, India). It's up until February 3. [Pictured: Ellie Ga, Fissure 5: 83N, 2E, 2008-11. Digital C-print. Courtesy the artist and Bureau NY

Screen Shot 2012-12-20 at 1.11.49 PM.jpg
6) Cool new taco joint from the folks behind the Breslin (Ken Friedman and April Bloomfield) just opened in our hood: Salvation Taco (145 East 39th Street). Heading there now! 

Watch a Drag Pop Culture Year In Review Set to Azealia Banks'"212"


Here's everything we didn't even know we wanted all in one place: a pop-culture year in review, as sung by NYC drag queen Peppermint to Azealia Banks' seminal hit, '212'! Watch  Peppermint hit upon everything from Lady Gaga and Honey Boo Boo, to lamenting all the time she wasted watching Real Housewives reunions (girl, us too). We highly suggest you watch this video in preparation for the end of the world tomorrow so that it flashes through your head as a giant snake wearing a party hat swallows the earth.

15 Made-For-TV Christmas Movies To Help You Disconnect

If you can sit through endless Febreze ads and the Zyrtec commercial where a woman writes a letter to her cat, we guarantee these Made-for-TV gems from Lifetime, ABC Family and Hallmark Channel will make you feel like you're floating in space with a vat of lukewarm eggnog for a brain. And isn't that the only way anyone wants to feel this stressful time of year? Below, our 15 favorite movies, which we genuinely enjoyed, in no particular order.

holidayhandcuffs.jpg1.) Holiday in Handcuffs
This yuletide nugget has the casting equivalent of an Altman film. Sabrina the Teenage Witch kidnaps Mario Lopez and makes him pretend to be her fiance while visiting her grandmother  and parents. Markie Post, Timothy Bottoms and June Lockhart -- who was the mom on Lassie and Donna Martin's grandma on 90210 -- co-star. Pure magic. And lucky for you, someone has uploaded the entire thing to YouTube.

12+Men+of+Christmas+DVD.jpg2.) 12 Men of Christmas
Idaho firefighters pose for a sexy calendar at the behest of bitchy NYC transplant Kristen Chenoweth. Heaven for gays and their mothers.

ComfortJoy.jpg3.) Comfort and Joy
Jo from Facts of Life stars as a high-powered single business woman who wakes up after crashing her Jaguar to discover she's a married stay-at-home mom. We give it 5 out of 5 "sipping coffee in an over-sized sweater, staring out the kitchen window"s. Dixie Carter and the dad from Sixteen Candles co-star. It's on Lifetime Sunday at 11 a.m.

Santa_Baby_2.jpg4.) Santa Baby 2
Reformed sex kitten Jenny McCarthy stars as high-powered NYC business woman whose dad is Santa and who has to take over his business when he retires. It co-stars Paul Sorvino as Santa (a role played by Geroge Wendt in the original Santa Baby -- what happened?) and Dean McDermott (of this) as Luke. You can watch the whole thing on ABCFamily.

MV5BMTI1NjYxOTYxOF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwOTgwMzYyMQ@@._V1._SX336_SY475_.jpg5.) A Diva's Christmas Carol
Vanessa Williams stars in the pop diva re-telling of this immortal yuletide tale, just the way that Charles Dickens completely, 100% would have wanted. It's on Saturday at 4 p.m. on the Lifetime Movie Network and at 11 a.m. on Lifetime Christmas day.

christmasconsultant.jpg6.) The Christmas Consultant
As far as we're concerned nothing says 'holiday' like ANYTHING involving David Hasselhoff. Here he plays a leading 'Christmas consultant' who's been hired to help Sabrina the Teenage Witch's aunt prepare for a massive holiday hootenanny she's got to plan. This debuted to low ratings last month but got a big boost when the Soup devoted an entire segment to the show. And guess what! It's on tonight!

christmashope.jpg7.) The Christmas Hope
Madeleine Stowe, newly hot (despite monkeying with her beautiful mug) thanks to her role as Victoria Grayson on TV's Revenge, starred in this Lifetime masterpiece from 2009. Stowe is a social worker trying to find homes for some unfortunate little nippers. Costars include James Remar (who was in the Warriors!) and 90210 alum Ian Ziering. It's on Saturday at 4 p.m.

51JNlnZXCLL.jpg8.) Home by Christmas
You don't even need to know what this Lifetime movie is about. You just need to know it stars Linda Hamilton. Case closed. It's on at 4 p.m. tomorrow on Lifetime Movie Network.

hitched-for-the-holidays-cast.jpg9) Hitched for the Holidays
Basically the same old story of two people pretending to be sweethearts to bamboozle their parents. (This time there's an interfaith twist -- she's Jewish, he's Catholic. It's a big deal.) But this has the bonus of Joey Lawrence wearing skintight clothing through out most of the movie and Marilu Henner. Jackpot.

Screen shot 2012-12-20 at 3.05.13 PM.png10.) Naughty or Nice
Some actress named Hilarie Burton plays Krissy Kringle (no relation to Kris Kringle), who mistakenly gets her hands on Santa's Naughty and Nice book. Hilarity ensues. The movie gets bonus points for featuring the original Family Ties parents, Meredith Baxter and Michael Gross, as Krissy's parents. We were sold from the start and so was the LA Times.

Screen shot 2012-12-20 at 3.11.21 PM.png11.) Come Dance with Me
Andrew McCarthy is still looking foyne in this Hallmark TV movie. He plays Jack, a finance man who's dating the boss's daughter. He signs up for dance classes to make a splash at the boss's big holiday party and in a shocking plot twist you'll never see coming, he falls for the dance teacher. It's on Lifetime tomorrow night at 9 p.m.

All-About-Christmas-Eve.jpg12.) All About Christmas Eve
The plot of this movie, starring Haylie Duff and Connie Sellecca, is too stupid to even bother explaining BUT, holy shit, it costars Stephen Colletti from Laguna Beach. And there's a cameo from Lifetime MVP Patrick Muldoon. It's on Christmas Eve at 6 p.m.

Callard-Harris-and-Torrey-DeVittoin-The-Real-St.-Nick._event_main.jpg13.) The Real St. Nick
This is about a guy who thinks he's Santa and ends up in a psych ward only to fall in love with his therapist (who is being wooed by an evil doctor with L'Oreal touch-on highlights). It's on Lifetime this Saturday at 10 p.m. and again Christmas night at 8 p.m.

Screen shot 2012-12-20 at 3.24.34 PM.png14.) The Merry In-Laws
This is more of an 8 p.m.-10 p.m. time-slot family film but stars George Wendt, who reprises his Santa Baby role as Santa, Shelly Long as Mrs. Claus and a guy. It's on at midnight on Christmas Eve.

15.) The New Year's Eve episode of Designing Women where Dolly Parton stars as a guardian angel.
It might not have been a Christmas episode, but it still makes us feel good to be alive.