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10 Observations on the Premiere of Lindsay Lohan's New Reality Show

Last night Oprah's OWN network aired the premiere of Lindsay Lohan's reality show, Lindsay, which documents the troubled star's attempt, fresh out of rehab, to get her career going again and stay sober. Nothing could go wrong when you ad a reality show to the mix, right? Join us below, we as review some highlights from the episode.

1) Oprah's pre-interviews are intense. Before they film an interview that aired on OWN in August, days after Lohan had been released from rehab,  Lindsay tells Oprah that she only wants to come across as herself in the interview. Oprah, smelling the bullshit, tells Lohan "I'm only interested in what is the truth." Lohan gulps and nods and then lets Oprah talk her out of going on a potentially sobriety-derailing trip to Europe. It's kind of awesome. Shouldn't this show just Oprah following Lindsay around, tell her not to do things and not breaking eye contact until Lohan agrees?

2) Much is made of the fact that Lindsay does not have an apartment in in New York, and must live for like three weeks in a 5-star hotel until she can find a place with a co-op board that will accept her. At first I was like, "get. over. it.," but it's understandable how disorienting and un-fun living out of a suitcase would feel for a person desperate for stability. Not a good idea. Kind of like doing a reality show fresh out of rehab.

3) Living out of a hotel means that she's living out of suitcases and boxes, with much of the show featuring her sorting through clothes, shoes and jewelry laid out in front of her as now sad reminders of her previous success. When she pulls a Mean Girls t-shirt with
"Fetch" on the front of it from a box at Dina's house, where most of her belongings are in storage, Dina stares blankly at it. Oh, oh, yes, that's right, Mean Girls. Cute, hon. Even crazy old Dina has moved on.

4) Lindsay's broker is named "Cash Bernard." Cash Bernard is, in Lindsay's opinion, not working as hard as he could to get her into an apartment. Cash Bernard is being "lackadaiscal" about the whole thing, says Lindsay of Cash Bernard. Cash Bernard.

5) Lohan has trust issues, and herself admits that people are always trying to jerk her around. This makes sense, given who her parents are, but one gets the impression watching Lohan become weepier and more explosive during an argument with a director at a lingerie shoot she had agreed to appear, in only to have her role changed without her knowledge, her only defense mechanism in these situations is to explode and act like a huge, bratty baby.

6) On said lingerie shoot, the grim realities of life as a former child star become plainly obvious. There are depressing one-on-ones with models likely 3 to 4 years younger than Lohan, talking about as her like she's a decades-older old washed-up star who's now a novelty. "I'm excited to work with Lindsay Lohan," says a girl in a bra. "Parent Trap was my favorite movie growing up." This is, where the show shines and shows real potential. While there are certainly one or two awkwardly staged opportunities --going to a fashion show to see her model sister, who seems vaguely surprised to see her there, walk the runway, for one -- the show is seemingly more or less candid. No bullshit staged storylines a la Keeping Up with the Kardashians or Real Housewives -- it's all about true intentions. This is Oprah country, y'all.

7) And for all of her own trust issues, people, unsurprisingly, don't trust Lindsay Lohan. When Cash Bernard does finally find her an apartment, she must also put down $10 million for an insurance policy. When Lohan is a no-show at The Canyons junket in Venice, director Paul Schraeder describes working with LL as like being "held hostage by a talented but unpredictable actress." Nope, nothing could go wrong with this Oprah reality show. Not at all.

8) Constant commercials for Cliffiside Malibu where Lohan did her latest rehab stints adds to the pressure on Lohan to not Totally Screw This Up. The ad's tagline:  "At Cliffisde, you should only have to do this once."

9) The paparazzi keep her prisoner in her hotel room, unable to go to an AA meeting, and it's pretty dark. She might not be getting work, but Lohan is still worth tons of paparazzi dollars, one photographer standing outside her hotel room flashing a watch at the camera that he brags Lohan paid for. 

10) Despite showing flashes of self-awareness, freely talking about her tendency to self-sabotage, she's also totally oblivious at other times. In one scene, Lohan remarks that in her pre-rehab life she existed in a bubble where everything was done for her, but that now she's more independent and doing things for herself. And then she has her personal assistant scramble to move all of her belongings into a new room in her hotel because she feels like a change of scenery.

Lily Allen Parties/Makes Out With Herself In "Our Time" Video


If you're looking for a pump-up jam on this otherwise ho-hum Monday then check out Lily Allen's just-released video for "Our Time." The track appears on her forthcoming (awesomely titled) album, Sheezus, and is all bouncy beats and earworm-y pop hooks like "And we can swing and dance the night away / We don't give a damn what people say / We've had enough so turn it up / Tonight we're taking over." The video, meanwhile, shows Allen vibing in a black cab alongside two other versions of herself. There's makeouts and barfing and even one version of Allen getting into a street fight while wearing a hotdog suit. Looks like a fun night.

Sheezus comes out on May 6 and you can see the newly-released album art and tracklist, below:

lilyallensheezus.jpg1. Sheezus
2. L8 CMMR
3. Air Balloon
4. Our Time
5. Insincerely Yours
6. Take My Place
7. As Long As I Got You
8. Close Your Eyes
9. URL Badman
10. Silver Spoon
11. Life For Me
12. Hard Out Here
13. Untitled
14. Somewhere Only We Know (Bonus Track)

President Obama Went On Between Two Ferns


President Obama went on Between Two Ferns and got called a nerd by Zach Galifianakis. The whole thing is pretty great and we have to give kudos to the Prez for being a good sport and playing along. The best parts included when Galifianakis asks Obama if he goes on .com or .net sites ("or just .gov"), asks if people will stop letting him win basketball games when he's no longer president and shows Obama some spider bites. [via Funny Or Die]

TMZ somehow acquired a tape of the Biebs' deposition for a case involving one of his bodyguards allegedly beating up a paparazzi. The entire six-and-a-half minute clip is so mental: Bieber gives zero fucks about the whole thing and it shows. He's rude, contemptuous and slightly zonked out the whole time and it's a mesmerizing watch. [via TMZ]

tumblr_n27htuqtbj1qa5z1ro1_500.jpgPitbull's coming for 'ya. [via Afternoon Snooze Button]

Here's a dude twirling a 'Planet Fitness' sign by the side of the road. Guy's got moves. [via Hyper Vocal]

tumblr_n1yytznZQs1rn7bzro1_500.jpgSame. [via Knusprig Titten Hitler]

Screen Shot 2014-03-10 at 7.05.20 PM.pngBehold, the Putin butt plug (not recommended for use). [via Gawker]

We don't totally know what's going on here but all we do know is that this is quite possibly the *best* cover of "Blurred Lines" we've ever seen: assorted drunk dudes singing a karaoke version complete with Surrealist strip club/hotel lobby graphics in the background. Wut.Is.Going.On. [via HuffPo Comedy]

Here's Kevin Bacon describing what the '80s were like for the benefit of Milennials. [via Mashable]

tumblr_n1v899qjhP1rh14rqo2_500-1.jpgBest bookmark ever. [via I'm With Kanye]

Jimmy Fallon and Jon Hamm photobombed a bunch of people atop 30 Rock. Love their tender hoagie moment! [via Tonight Show]

Here's a sneak peek at True Detective: Season 2 starring...Jimmy Kimmel and Seth Rogen. [via Jimmy Kimmel]

tumblr_lz815xMAZV1qdezf9o1_500.gifHappy Warm Weather Tuesday, y'all! [via Coin Farts]

10 Observations On This Week's Real Housewives of Beverly Hills: "Are You My Friend?"

Screen Shot 2014-03-11 at 12.49.26 PM.pngWe've asked Eli Yudin and Carey O'Donnell, authors of the very, very funny Twitter account @NotTildaSwinton, to share their ten thoughts, feelings, hopes and dreams with us after watching the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills every week. Join us for a recap, won't you?

1) Carey: The ladies gather at this very made-up sounding "Beverly Hills Centennial Gala," held around the famous Beverly Hills Hilton. Centennial Galas! Right??? "Can you believe Beverly Hills is 100 years old," the gala host asks in his opening speech. How many centennial galas have you been to? I want my wake to take place during a centennial gala. I'll be in a glass casket that everyone can leave half-drunken glasses of pinot and moist h'orderve napkins on. Won't that be nice! Anyway, the whole damn show takes place at this pretend event, and all the unresolved conflict between mostly everyone and Charlatan Vanderpump is supposed to boil to the surface, but it really just kind of farts its way up. Everything is so violently boring in this episode that I can't even begin to articulate what the major plot points were. I can say that each woman approached Lisa and Ken at some point, who stood there smugly, waiting for apologies they didn't deserve. But they sure as hell got them! Each lady managed to cough up an unnecessary "I'm sorry" for whatever bullshit that went down in Puerto Rico -- the same trip these fraudy Brits fled in the dead of night without telling anyone because they were called out for the various terrible, mean-spirited things they've committed towards each of them. "Thank you." Lisa says with her best victim voice, barely looking at any of them. Not once did either 'Pump dole out a "Thanks, I'm sorry, too." NOT ONCE! I guess good for them. That'd be a great way to go through life, right?

2) Eli: First off, the title of the episode is "Are You My Friend?" It's very strange and makes me somewhat uncomfortable.  I imagine Brandi wandering an abandoned asylum with blank eyes, calling out down hallways, "Are you my friend?"  Either that or it sounds like a strange gameshow where every contestant just has to figure out if someone is their friend or enemy, which actually isn't too bad of a description of this show.  Other possible alternate names for Real Housewives episodes are "Dinner Arguments" and "Quiet Anger."

3) Eli: Watching the season review at the start of the episode reminds all of us just how little really happens on this show.  It's the first time on this show that it's been edited accurately for content.

4) Eli: Lisa arrives at the gala and then the women spend approximately 25 minutes silently kissing each other on the cheeks, parroting "Hello, darling."  Everyone at the gala slowly stops talking and a droning silence takes over.  All that can be heard is the smacking of lips and slow wet blinks.  Slowly we realize that everyone else at the Gala is simply a cardboard cutout, moving along tracks in the ground.  Yolanda and Lisa circle each other, pecking back and forth, as the moon collides with the earth in the background.

5) Eli: Despite the fact that I made fun of it already, the title of this episode turns out to be frighteningly apt, since the question "Are you my friend," in some variation, is asked about 400 times over the course of this episode.  Seriously, the whole thing is like a strange speed dating event.  Every time the bell rings, the next person switches with you to ask Lisa "how you could do this to me," etc.  To be fair, Lisa is being pretty damn bitchy, and Ken is in full tantrum mode, playing with his blocks at the corner table

6) Carey: Ken decided to full-on peacock what a steaming heap of misogynistic, snobby garbage he is on this episode. Since Lisa is too much of a wienie to be an up-front bitch, she makes her little clay pudge-hub Ken do the heavy lifting in most confrontations. But it's gotten to Ken's head! He is a mad dog now, spouting awful things like, "They're a bunch of silly women," while talking to Mauricio about the drama, literally laughing off the validity in Kim's claims of Lisa's fuckery because of her boozy past, telling Yolanda she's "stupid" and poking her. POKING HER! You don't poke Yo-Yo! "Do not touch me, Keeeeeeehn!" She yells. What would David My Love think? DAVID MY LOVE? David My Love is in the studio recording with Stevie Wonder and probably doesn't care that much, but still! David My Love! Each night, Ken will dream that he's wading through vast bogs of lemons, seeming to stretch on past the horizon. The sky will be a flaming blue, and he'll hear Yolanda humming in the distance, humming a song she sang to herself when she was a young girl on her farm in Holland.  He'll call out to her, but the humming will only get louder, and more distant, on all sides of him. The bog will become too deep, and he'll start to sink, struggling to grab on to the lemons for support, until he slips farther and farther into the deep blue below.

7) Carey: I'm still shocked at how much Wino Glanville has grown on me. I wish she could just keep it together to maintain a valid argument with Lisa, let alone anyone, but she starts getting that Chardo-slur and you know any constructive and correct concerns or accusations she has will just sound so shitty. She brings up the Scheana thing to Lisa again, aka the "Your employee is the woman my ex-husband was having routine sexual intercourse with while I was pregnant with his child, and you continue to shove her in my face physically and through the TV screen on the spinoff show about your restaurant that she is a main character on, mostly because of my highly publicized divorce"-argument. "I don't see her like that," Lisa says with gross compassion to Brandi, who was like, "Scheana's a dumb whore who contributed to the demise of my marriage." The worst was when Lisa said (about Scheana) with this horrible guttural chuckle, "She's not a friend, dahling. If she was a friend, she wouldn't be washing dishes; she'd be sitting at the table." I imagined Stassi watching that, looking shocked, then saying, "Wowwww" to herself, then waiting a moment before sniffing rubber cement.

8) Carey: PS, let's just make note that the mics caught Lisa saying, "I'm not going to get called out by someone who can barely remember anything," as she storms out of the gala about Yolanda. Yolanda is recovering from a terrible case of Lyme Disease, in which memory loss in a huge symptom of. Oh. Kay. OK, Lisa. OK!!!! Bye, Lisa!!!!! Bye now!!!! Take care, goblin!

9) Eli: We slowly see fewer and fewer people in the background of the gala, as everyone takes turns accusing Ken and Lisa of things that they probably did, but I don't even care anymore.  Ken pokes Yolanda, and that's messed up, but for the most part it's all just the same verbal fencing match that's been going on since the beginning, with no one really landing any strikes.  Then, abruptly, titles slide in from the side of the screen to detail what they've all been "up to" since this godforsaken party.  The most laughable of these (besides Portia's career goal of "child actress," which is really more terrifying) is Carlton's, which explains the trajectory of that stupid skull necklace that they'd tried to inflate into a genuine conflict.  Apparently, Carlton didn't want it and gave it back to Kyle, who gave it to Joyce, who left it on her front step, and it... DISAPPEARED!  Which the show seems to want to present as black magic instead of the fact that if you leave expensive jewelry out in public, people will probably take that.  That skull necklace is at a pawn shop somewhere in the vicinity, having been liquidated in order to buy heroin.

10) Carey: Kyle's closing tagline says she's helping Portia achieve her goal of being a child actress, and I actually said out loud to myself, "Oh, fuckkkkkkk." The circle opens. I kept picturing a faded image of Portia's face superimposed over that scene in the very beginning of The Exorcist where Father Merrin wearily looks on at the unearthed Sumerian demon statue that possesses Linda Blair while the stray dogs fight below it. Kim wakes in pre-dawn one morning, her eyes slowly opening. "Portia," she whispers as she stares at the ceiling above her; her mouth widening until it's locked in a silent scream of perpetual horror, a familiar horror.


DISown Blows Away the Boundaries Between Art and Commerce

Screen Shot 2014-03-11 at 12.44.21 PM.pngHood By Air, Salad Bowl

If you happened to be walking by Chelsea's Red Bull Studios last Thursday, you would've noticed an interesting sight: Nike-clad art school kids dodging between rope course installations to get a better look at hand-painted, knock-off Adidas tracksuits or toilet paper cleverly hung to resemble a zen waterfall. Welcome to DISown: Not For Everyone. A new art show-cum-boutique by the DIS Collective and curator Agatha Wara, DISown takes its cues from the fashion world's tradition of partnering with big-box retailers to create affordable mass-market pieces. Playing with the idea of diffusion lines for artists, the show lets visitors scope -- and buy -- things like a mobile trashcan and office planter by artist Lizzie Fitch, a salad bowl by Hood By Air or a Maje Cule-designed folding chair intended to "maximize intern productivity." Chanel and Jeremy Scott may have elevated supermarket logos to the runways of high-fashion, but Wara and DIS aim to bring high art down a few notches.

Formed in 2010, DIS -- like the prefix implies -- is oppositional. DIS Magazine, the main platform for the collective, approaches art and fashion with a critical wink. While top-knots are permanently trending at Vogue, DIS Magazine features trends like the "shoe bra" and the "boyfriend hood" (because "boyfriend jeans" are too committed). Most often, their aesthetic can only be described as "very DIS" but visitors to their site are likely to pick up on the collective's fascination with -- and inspiration from -- stock photo imagery. At one point, the group even turned The Suzanne Geiss Company gallery into a fully operational stock photography studio where they tapped contemporary young artists like Ryan Trecartin, Takeshi Murata, Anne De Vries and others to create images for their very own stock photo site.

Screen Shot 2014-03-11 at 12.43.24 PM.pngJogging, Whistleblower Beanie/Flower Pot

And this subversion of mass-market or corporate culture extends to DISown. The first thing you notice when arriving to the gallery are floor-to-ceiling length skinnings that announce the show but look more like flyers for a corporate-sponsored 5k run. Inside, IKEA-esque iconography on the walls direct the viewer throughout the "store" and give off the feeling that the gallery exists as a jungle gym for concepts. Walking past artist-designed clothing hanging from rope-course structures like those you'd find at "team-building retreats," guests encounter a functional rock-climbing wall that everyone is encouraged to try.

The show cleverly illustrates DIS' ethos of wanting to disrupt existing hierarchies in the art world and to work outside of traditional art economies. In doing so, it also addresses issues about the financial sustainability of being an artist in New York. "There's a lot of practical reasons to merge business with art," co-curator and member of the DIS collective, Lauren Boyle, says. "You actually do need money to live. There's nothing wrong with making something and selling it."

DISown Infomercial
Although many artists recognize the need to explore new models of survival, much of the traditional art world still attempts to hold on to their rigid boundaries between art and commerce (excluding projects involving business from grants and public arts funding). But "this romantic view of art can't interact with the realities," Wara asserts.

And as corporate ventures look more like art and and art shows start to look more like boutiques, the curators question exactly where this leaves the artist. "I think it's about finding potential," Wara says. "Finding out how we can negotiate differently, how we can make parameters for ourselves that give us new agency." says Wara.

Screen Shot 2014-03-11 at 12.44.04 PM.pngLizzie Fitch/Ryan Trecartin with Murphy Maxwell, Witness Night Vision 360 Sweatshirt 

Beyond questions of commerce, there are other ways the contemporary working artist cannot afford to be precious. In a time where artists can exist as personal brands online, with thousands of Twitter followers and enthusiastic fan bases, DIS' retail space functions as an ingenious way to capitalize on that clout. Lizzie Fitch and Ryan Trecartin's Witness Night Vision 360 sweatshirts -- a replica of the uniforms that the crew wore in Trecartin's short film, Junior War -- serve as a compelling example of the show's central question: what is the future of artists licensing their brand or name recognitions to consumable goods? In the most extreme case, shows like DISown could exist like movie-franchise rides at Disney. The art audience could commune in the experience and then take home a souvenir from the gift shop.

But the exhibit isn't as welcoming as Disney. Though the idea of a diffusion line exists to bring luxury goods to the masses, DIS, as their tagline playfully acknowledges, isn't for everyone. On the Thursday opening, the Chelsea space was packed from wall to rock-wall with art school kids and insiders. And, while a broke art student might wander in and purchase a Whistleblower Beanie/Flowerpot, the fact remains that an unsuspecting tourist probably wouldn't. Access to knowledge and a sense of "coolness" are still relevant status markers here.

Though even that is up for grabs. Thanks to the Internet, access to the show -- not to mention the consumer goods -- will soon be open to everyone. Once the exhibit closes, DIS plans to open up an online marketplace so even if you didn't make it out to Chelsea, you can still snag an Emma Watson body pillow.

All photos courtesy of DISown: Not For Everyone

Top 10 Most Normcore-y Normcore Celebs

Because nothing says "I make 2 million bucks per movie" like wearing an outfit that looks like it came from the closet of a 14-year-old boy.

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 3.21.44 PM.png
(Photo via Just Jared)

10. Shia LaBeouf
Shia looks very Dartmouth.

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 3.58.09 PM.png9. Rosie O'Donnell
Rosie's always been very 'koosh ball chic.'

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 12.00.17 PM.png8. Conor Kennedy
Conor earns a spot on this list because of that incredible Boar's Head t-shirt. Any guy that wears supermarket deli brand apparel is a guy I want to take long walks and eat ham and swiss sandwiches with.

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 11.56.27 AM.png7. Steven Tyler
When you've spent most of your life dressing like a rock god, sometimes it's nice to DGAF and treat your feet to some comfy, comfy Tevas. Plus, you never know when you might have to hike through a puddle on your way to lunch at The Ivy.

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 12.04.43 PM.png6. Jennifer Garner
Jen's a busy mom-on-the-go so I can't give her too much grief for the horrible bootcut jeans-and-New Balance sneaks combo but I will say it's very 'Family Outing to SeaWorld." Nobody's got time for complicated footwear when you're waiting in a line to see a water show.

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 3.44.56 PM.png5. Jake Gyllenhaal
Jake frequently dresses like that guy on my block who always looks like he's getting ready to meet the guys and go play a pick-up game but the reality is there is no pick-up game. There never is a pick-up game. Sad/confused emoji face.

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 3.49.16 PM.png4. 2 Chainz
Don't let the rapper's chains and fancy iPad case fool you: he is hashtag normcore. From the cargo capris to the clip-on cell phone to, of course, the Adidas shower sandals with socks, 2 Chainz lifted his wardrobe straight from an Austrian dude I once had a crush on during a teen tour. (Side note: can we trademark 'Eurocore™'?)

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 3.27.58 PM.png3. Kristen Stewart
Okay so this *may* have been taken on a movie set buttt Kristen, for all the love she gets in the fashion world, has always struck me as a tomboyish, normie gal at heart. And in this picture, she totally looks like that girl you knew in high school who was on the swim team and was kinda nice/kinda mean and always had wet hair in class (6am practice, duh) and now works at a non-profit somewhere in the Bay Area and makes way more money than you do.

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 11.52.44 AM.png2. Britney Spears
Brit Brit is the queen of normcore. Previously, we've exhaustively documented her love of short-sleeve turtlenecks and this cherry sweatshirt reminds me of a sweatshirt my aunt picked up for my grandma one time at TJ Maxx not realizing it was actually by a brand marketed to 13-year-olds.

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 11.43.08 AM.png1. Leonardo DiCaprio
Leo reminds me of that hot older camp counselor at your first co-ed sleepaway camp in the mid-to-late '90s who probably had one of his ears pierced and listened to Dave Matthews Band and Phish and then later went on to become a banker or a real estate agent in Chicago (or maybe Boston) but has hung onto his Birks for almost 20 years for whenever he needs a little 'me time' and wants to pop in some DMB on his iPod for old times' sake and just, like, chill out.

Special Mention:

Screen shot 2014-03-08 at 11.57.16 AM.pngBarack Obama
Never forget.

Cecile zu Hohenlohe's Jewelry Line Rises From the Ashes

As a little girl, HSH Princess Cecile zu Hohenlohe-Langenburg would watch her mother, aunt and grandmother get ready for lavish royal balls at Langenburg Castle in Baden-Württemberg, Germany. They would always accessorize with the family jewels: pieces that had been in the family for generations. But it wasn't so much the jewels themselves as an old jewelry box that inspired the princess' first collection of fine jewelry.
(clockwise from right): Cecile's great-grandmother Princess Alexandra of Saxe-Coburg; Princess Charlotte of Croy wearing her engagement ring with baby Cecile; Cecile's grandmother Princess Margarita of Greece wearing the family's original jewels; Langenburg Castle where Cecile grew up and now has her studio.

In 1896 Cecile's great-grandmother, Princess Alexandra of Saxe-Coburg, got married to Prince Ernst, of Hohenlohe-Langenburg. As a granddaughter of both Queen Victoria of England and Tsar Alexander II of Russia, Alexandra was one of the most eligible bachelorettes of the day. She had three beautiful sisters who also married well: one to the Grand Duke of Hesse, one to an Infante of Spain and one to the eventual King of Romania. Their mother, the Duchess of Edinburgh and the only daughter of the Tsar, was famous for her incredible collection of jewels, and when Alexandra was married, her mother gave her a priceless parure of rubies, diamonds and a lotus-shaped tiara, which were stored in an amazing giant wooden jewelry box with velvet trays. Over the years various pieces were sold to support Russian cousins escaping the Bolshevik revolution. Later a terrible fire at Langenburg in 1963 would destroy what was left of the jewels. The only piece left from the Duchess' legendary set of jewels was the ruby ring Cecile's father, Prince Kraft of Hohenlohe, gave to her mother, Princess Charlotte of Croy, as an engagement ring.

One day when Cecile was a young girl she was wandering through the attic and found the jewelry box. "I opened it and saw the jewelry imprints [in the velvet]. I knew that there was nothing left in there, but the imprints made me dream of what these pieces could or would have been."


(clockwise from top right): A velvet tray from Princess Alexandra's jewelry box; the Lotus Ring; the molten metal discovered after the fire.

She first began making jewelry at boarding school with a goldsmith from a nearby village. "I enjoyed being able to use my hands to produce something of that nature," says Cecile. She studied sculpture, stage design and prop making at university in London but says she "continued making all of these little objects." Over the years she worked on product development for friends like designer Tom Dixon and started her own design consulting business. Then about a year and a half ago she rediscovered the jewelry box in the attic. "It rekindled something, like when you meander on different paths and  then something happens that brings you back to something essential in you. It is something you know you must follow. And that's how it began."

Inspired by the Buddhist quote, "In the gap between thoughts, concept-free wisdom continuously shines forth," Cecile's rings, made from precious and semi-precious stones found on her travels, took the form of wearable sculpture with the stones seeming to float above the hand in the space between the fingers. This past December they made their New York debut in a show hosted by design entrepreneur Murray Moss called In the Space Between


As she designed her collection, her mother's engagement ring, the only piece from the original suite of jewels to survive, sat on her desk in her studio. It had always had tremendous sentimental value, but it wasn't the kind of thing she would normally wear. "I tried setting this ring with so many different stones, and it wasn't right," recalls Cecile.  Then she paired the ruby and diamonds with a sawed-off chunk of molten metal that was found after the fire in the castle. "Maybe it was an old bronze, a lovely old Bernini," she laughs. "Who knows?" But it worked. The Lotus Ring, as it is now called, is her most personal piece and the one that best reflects Cecile's identity as an artist. "The ring became the symbol in my own sort of way of the phoenix rising out of the flames, which oddly enough is our family crest." 

Styled by Solange Franklin
For purchase details please contact INFO@MOSSBUREAU.COM 

New Party Alert! Play Station at The Lash

Screen Shot 2014-03-11 at 4.05.09 PM.pngIt's Tuesday night and only the front room of The Lash is open -- and it's small. By 11 p.m., the venue has filled up -- it's really more of a bar than a dance club. You might be able to get down on a slice of floor in front of the DJ booth but it's more likely you'll be hanging around the bar or in the ample sitting area, kicking back on boxy wood seats and setting your drink down on a table that's topped by a cracked mirror.

For the past year, The Lash has been serving up underground vibes inside a chic downtown bar. And Tuesday nights belong to Play Station. The brainchild of Isaac Ledesma (a.k.a. The God Doll), the weekly party has been building buzz and bringing together a cool, creative, and beautifully odd crowd. (That Ledesma's party has attracted such a fun following makes sense -- he's also the creative director for Mustache Mondays, a popular party at nearby La Cita, and used to throw an event called Suicide Club.) 

"If you were a raver or a goth when you were in high school, then this is your party," Ledesma says. The idea is to mix nods to corporate branding with notions of a "video game reality." Hence, the name Play Station. Musically, the DJs delve into electronic styles that don't typically get a lot of play in L.A. Ledesma tends to book DJs and performers who are relatively new to the scene and a night at Play Station is ultimately about discovery. "It's mostly kind of rave fun," he says, "a throwback to warehouse parties, but in a club."

DJ Bag Lady (Michael Locker) is the resident here and says approvingly that "it's a really good mixture of weirdos." Bag Lady relocated from Baltimore to Los Angeles six months ago and he incorporates Baltimore and Philly club sounds into sets that also include styles like reggaeton, bubble and dancehall.

There's a tall, thin guy hanging out in the corner. His hair hangs in two long, blonde braids. He's wearing baggy, rolled up Everlast sweatpants, an oversized t-shirt and a baseball cap. This is The mOOnbird. He's a producer from Copenhagen but has been traveling back-and-forth between his hometown and Los Angeles. The mOOnbird wasn't listed on tonight's flyer, but he's drawn a pretty good crowd. He dances behind the DJ booth, busting out snake-y moves as he goes between a laptop and microphone. Later on, he performs inside a crowd crammed between the staircase and the booth. He twists, turns and drops to the ground. The crowd breaks up into a half-circle around him.

Tonight that crowd is a jumble of kids in jeans, tank tops, sneakers and hoodies -- streetwear cool is the look here. There's a girl with a crescent moon adorning her forehead. I ask her if it's a Sailor Moon thing. She says that I'm the second person to ask that question. It's not intended to be a nod to the anime franchise, she says, but she loved it as a kid, so maybe it's a subconscious thing. Later in the evening, a couple recognizable figures from the local scene arrive. They're decked out in party gear, a furry vest here, a sparkling cowboy hat there.

One guy tells me that he likes that this place is removed from downtown's primary party strip. Located between Main and Los Angeles, the Lash is closer to DIY venue The Smell than it is to the skyrise-adjacent bar scene that marks downtown nightlife.

Location is part of what makes Play Station work. In the late '90s/early '00s, when downtown emptied by 6 p.m., warehouse and loft parties marked the city's underground. You would get a text message with a destination and drive around a desolate neighborhood listening for bass. Inside the parties, you could dance to the music that the legit venues ignored. The Lash is a proper club -- a beautifully designed one at that -- but it feels like a loft. It is the place to go when you want to ditch the bottle service of Hollywood or the crowds in Silver Lake and Echo Park.

Ladesma is right with the warehouse party comparison. This isn't a retro night for those pining for the old downtown. It is, however, committed to doing things differently, to pushing the sound of L.A. forward. And it's refreshing to find a weekly hangout in this town that isn't pulling the same old party tricks.

Play Station at The Lash, 117 Winston St., Los Angeles; 10 pm - 2 am, no cover.

Watch Chelsea Handler Hand Piers Morgan His Ass


Watch our Spring cover star Chelsea Handler tell Piers Morgan he's terrible at his job. Oh my god, this is so good. [Jezebel]

tumblr_n29u63MMvi1qewacoo1_500.jpgA+ [TastefullyOffensive]

XTY6.gifOh hi. [Mlkshk]

Billy Eichner plays "Billy On the Street" with the audience of the tonight show. [Uproxx]

XU8Y.pngWhen giant, angry cats attack. This is from a 911 phone call in which a family cat had gone nuts and trapped a man, his wife and their baby in a bedroom. You can hear it charging the door in the background. Everyone is fine now. [Gawker]

Watch this video extra from Lena Dunham's SNL episode in which Vanessa Bayer shows off a sweet new dance move.

Matthew McConaughey explains the origins of his signature "alright, alright, alright" tagline that absolutely no one is kiiiinda a little tired of hearing. This video is from 2011, but it is no less required viewing for those who who like to start their day with McConaughey. Hoo-RAY! (Sorry) [Uproxx]

Pharrell and Comme des Garçons Are Teaming Up On a Fragrance

Screen Shot 2014-03-12 at 10.32.50 AM.png
Back in December, we spotted Pharrell scoping out the goods at the new Manhattan location of Rei Kawakubo's concept store, Dover Street Market, and at the time we didn't think anything of it but now we're wondering if he was getting any inspiration (or taking any meetings) for his new fragrance. Announced today, the producer is teaming up with Kawakubo's Comme des Garçons on a scent named after his recently-released album, G I R L. It's the first time the fashion house has collaborated on a fragrance with a musician and there's still no word on what notes we'll find in the unisex scent. We hear more details about G I R L will come out this spring and bottles will be available for purchase in September.

Olympic Gold Medalist Iouri Podladtchikov: The New Prince of Halfpipe

Iouri Podladtchikov Collage 5.jpgRussian-born and Swiss-raised Iouri Podladtchikov has been on the competitive snowboard scene since he was 12 years old. And now, thirteen years later, the 25-year-old recently won the gold medal in the Olympic halfpipe competing for Team Switzerland, taking down the reigning two-time champion, Shaun White. While in town, the Olympian stopped by PAPER HQ to talk about athlete cliques in the Olympic food court, Tinder, and snowboarding's unusual scoring system.  

How was Sochi?

It was pretty impressive to be honest, especially the Olympic park.

Was it impressive? I heard it wasn't well built?

Yeah I think that was just people trying to make it look bad. A lot of people pushed the bad news out as much as possible, but I didn't have a bad experience at all.

No problems with the bathrooms?

No! [Laughs] There were a lot more volunteers than I've seen at the past Olympic games I've been to. You hear about how much it cost and you see what they did with that money -- I was impressed.

How were these games compared to the last ones you went to in Turin and Vancouver?

It was a lot more fun for me because I speak Russian, and of course because I won. My whole family was there including lots of aunts and uncles who never come out to events so that was very special for me.

In your first Olympics you actually competed for Russia, right? Why did you switch to competing for Switzerland?

It's really simple: I was growing up in Switzerland and I didn't get much support from the Russian team. It was kind of a pain to organize things with them because they were in Russia and I was in Switzerland and so the vibe was always weird. I didn't have a good relationship with the coaches or staff either.

So it wasn't weird when you went to the Swiss team?

No, totally not. Nobody blamed me for it, actually, because they knew that I didn't really get much support from the Russian team. They're not big in snowboarding.

When you heard it was in Russia did you ever consider going back to the Russian team?

They tried to convince me but there was never a real offer. And I have a good relationship with my coach on the Swiss team.

When did you do to celebrate after you won?

The first night was more taking pictures than actually celebrating. It was still really nice because all my family and relatives were there with me.

Did you celebrate with all the athletes or just the snowboarders?

Just with my family and the Swiss team. It's really split up because [halfpipe is] such a huge event. But people interact in different ways -- you all eat at the same places. The food court at the Olympic village is where you meet the most new people from different villages and different sports, but I didn't go there after I won. I was mostly at the house [where my family was staying].

Is it cliquey in the food court? Do people only sit with their teammates?

Yeah they do and it is [cliquey] but some people like going around and saying "hi." At the same time you have to remember everyone has an Olympic event coming up that is the most important competitive event of their lives and you don't want to be the person that's just, like, a tourist going around saying "Hello, Hi, my name is this and that." People are serious.

Do rivalries play out in the food court like they do on the playing field?

I didn't pay much attention to that. When I walk into the food court I look for food or pretty faces. It's like anywhere else -- you walk in and think "Oh she's hot" or "This guy's fat." It's the same as anywhere else.

Are there fat people at the Olympics?

[Laughs] That's a good question. I'd say not "fat" but for example, the bobsled teams are fuckin' huge. They don't all look super sporty.

Since you mentioned pretty faces earlier, we're always hearing about how much sex goes on over there -- was it really crazy?

You know, as an Olympian I also read about that and I kept looking for weird couples or stuff like that but I didn't see anything -- like, nothing. I was pretty disappointed.

What about Tinder? Were you on it while you were there?

Yeah, I tried but there were not many people using Tinder. I didn't have any matches in Sochi unfortunately.

There was a lot of criticism of Shaun White during the Sochi games. What did you make of all that?

I think it's bullshit.

What about the debate between style and big flips?

I think that's also bullshit -- it's just a never-ending story. They've always been talking about that.

So you don't think snowboarding should go in one direction or the other?

Well there's only one direction and that's to make it look good. You can have both style and flips. The people who can't pull that off are the ones who started this conversation. They're sitting around on their couch all day eating popcorn and one day they decide flipping is not stylish. You can do a stylish triple cork -- we've seen it, it's been done already.

How is snowboarding scored?

They call it 'overall impression' they kind-of just make up the score and there's no system. It's all bluffing. You see at the Olympics one judge will give [a rider] an 82 and the next a 92 -- the scores are so far away from each other because there's no system.

Because how do you judge snowboarding anyway?

Exactly, exactly! That's a good question. Write that down -- "how do you judge snowboarding?"

Do you plan on going back to the Olympics?

I think so. It would be kind of cool to go back and try to defend the medal.

Louisa Gummer Gets High-Seas Chic This Season

Shirt and shorts by See by Chloe, Hat by Kate Spade Saturday, leg warmers by Prada, 
shoes by Vans and earring by Delfina Delettrez.


Shirt by Ashish, shirt underneath by Marc by Marc Jacobs, hat by Eugenia Kim and necklace by Giles & Brother.


Jacket by Marc Jacobs, bathing suit bottoms by Kenneth Cole, hairpiece by Arielle de Pinto,

 ring by A Peace Treaty and earring by Delfina Delettrez.


Jacket, skirt, headpiece and shoes by Louis Vuitton.


Blazer by Lanvin, shirt by Valentino, pants by Ashish, socks by Miu Miu, 
earpiece by A Peace Treaty and earring by Delfina Delettrez.


Dress by Rachel Comey and shoes by Sacai.

Dress by Sacai, headpiece by Delphine-Charlotte Parmentier and earring by Delfina Delettrez.


Overalls and shirt by Kate Spade Saturday, coat, shoes and choker by Miu Miu, 

bracelet by Prada and earring by Delfina Delettrez.


Coat by Prada, shirt by Marc by Marc Jacobs, bathing suit bottoms by A.P.C. + Tooshie, 

hat by Lola and shoes by Vans.

Starring Louisa Gummer at IMG Models

Photographer's Assistant: Tyler Nevitt
Makeup by Deanna Melluso / Hair by Linh Nguyen
Fashion Coordinator: Kelly Govekar / Interns: Irene Jaramillo and Zach Rosenbaum
Shot at the Jane hotel

SXSW's Interactive Activity


Edward Snowden's SXSW live chat. (via ACLU YouTube)

There's talk among SXSW veterans that after 20 years the Austin-based annual music, film, and interactive conference and festival has lost its serendipity, that it's become predictable with few surprises for the been there/done that, seen-it-all crowd.

Well, I'm here to set their mind at rest. No way! What began as a music festival has mushroomed into a sprawling multi-layered experience encompassing a mind-boggling array of talks, panels, demos, launches, parties, bands, films, comedy and stuff I'm leaving out but you get the drift. Hotels are booked months in advance and every available space from the mammoth convention center to hotels like the Hilton, Sheraton, Four Seasons, Marriott, Holiday Inn, Hyatt and so forth are crammed with people looking to either be, see, or create the next big thing. From Julian Assange to Edward Snowden to Chelsea Clinton, Seth Meyers, Bill Simmons, Ezra Klein, Nate Silver, Shaquille O'Neil, Nas, Mindy Kaling, Neal deGrasse Tyson, Lena Dunham, the list goes on and on. It's physically impossible to see it all so I'm spending my two days here wandering in and out, noshing the delicacies at the world's biggest brain food emporium.

"Media & The Personal Brand: ESPN, Grantland & 538" is already in session when I join the thousand or so folks watching a conversation between sports authority Bill Simmons, editor-in-chief of Grantland, and Nate Silver, a.k.a. the number cruncher who accurately predicted the last two presidential elections and left his prestigious gig at the New York Times to become a brand. Not surprisingly, the sports guy is doing most of the talking and the cerebral guy mostly thinking, but together they present a united front by example: yes, journalists can use their personal celebrity (and social following) to build a business and transition from taking orders to being their own bosses.

A few minutes to spare before the day's keynote, I head over to the Hilton to catch a half-hour of the Accelerator. Kind of a Shark Tank for techies, entrepreneurs present their apps to a panel of judges and an audience of would-be investors in the hope of attracting venture capital that will turn their fledgling apps into valuable bitcoins. The guy presenting has a decent idea: Using tablets to produce hand-written thank you notes that are printed and mailed within 24-hours. Better than an e-mail, I think. But still not as good as the real thing.

A mutual friend e-introduced me to Brad King (@thebradking) and we meet for coffee. Brad hosts the Accelerator finals on Sunday and has been a fixture at SXSW, making 19 out of 20. He's written for Wired, was senior editor at MIT's Technology Review, is on SXSW Interactive's advisory board and is currently an Assistant Professor of Journalism at Ball State University. He knows a lot and I pick his brain about the state of digital publishing today, especially as it applies to Papermag.com. Takeaway: You can't build a business on Facebook and good stories are what ultimately drive traffic.

Back at the Convention Center the line for Neil deGrasse Tyson is long but moving briskly. Full disclosure: Never heard of him before but the keynote speakers are usually good so I go and raise my eyebrows in appreciation when he's introduced as an astrophysicist, director of the Hayden Planetarium, the man who demoted Pluto as a planet and host of the new iteration of Cosmos, the TV show made famous by Carl Sagan. As if that isn't enough he's incredibly entertaining, getting laughs distilling complicated scientific concepts into bite-size nuggets. No wonder he was asked to fill Carl Sagan's shoes. Takeaway: He doesn't believe in astrology.

The next morning is anything but a lazy Sunday. A fat schedule of events demand my attention and I opt for "Equipping & Inspiring the Next Generation" with Dean Kamen, best known as the man who invented the Segway. Turns out he's done lots of other things, too: he holds more than 440 U.S. and foreign patents, many of them for innovative medical devices. A repeat presenter, he updates the audience about ongoing products like a robotic arm that an amputee or soldier who has had his arm blown off can use to pick up a grape and eat it. He also hypes FIRST (For Inspiration and Recognition of Science and Technology), his non-profit that works with kids to get them into science. Today he's most proud of a purifying station he's invented for countries with undrinkable water, teaming up with Coca-Cola's vast distribution network to get it where its needed. Coca-Cola wants the devices and the stations painted Coca Cola red but are otherwise glad to support the program. Question: Mr Kamen, how do you feel teaming up with a company at least partially responsible for the world's obesity epidemic because it markets carbonated sugar-loaded drinks to kids.

Next stop: "Running the Show: TV's New Queen of Comedy" with star, head writer and show runner Mindy Kaling and her Mindy Project co-stars Adam Pally and Ike Barinholtz. Kaling is not only a star but an inspiration for young women who feel stifled in a man's world, one of a small group -- along with Tina Fey, Amy Poehler and Lena Dunham -- who are breaking the glass ceiling. Clearly hanging on to her every word, fans of The Office who have moved on with Mindy to her new home, are in heaven until the mood turns with a question from a member of the audience along the lines of "why aren't there more people of color on the show?" Kaling, of Indian descent, bristles, countering that she's asked that question more often than any show runners with all-white casts. Why is that?

Afterwards, I walk in and out of a discussion between Silicon Valley veteran John Battelle and Sundar Pichary, VP of Google Product Management about Android, ChromeCast and all things googly. It's too dry and techie so instead I head over to a small room designed for 15-minute presentations and catch the tail end of "Hacking Hollywood" by Ralph Echemendia -- "The Ethical Hacker." As Hollywood increasingly incorporates multiple technologies in their production workflows, the threats of leaks and security breaches proliferate. To my delight and horror, he live hacks a home computer and blithely declares that everyone will be hacked sooner or later. Disturbing.

He's followed by Alex Winter, the actor (Bill and Ted's Incredible Adventure)-turned-director/producer of Downloaded, a feature documentary on the rise and fall of Napster and the birth of the digital revolution. He is currently working on a new feature documentary, Deep Web: The Untold Story of Bitcoin and The Silk Road. His passionate talk, "The Battle for the Digital Frontier," calls for groups like the RIAA (Recording Industry) to stop going after their consumers in the name of protecting copyright. Better encryption, he argues, will go a long way to protect citizens and businesses from having their secrets stolen. Who will win the epic battle between the promise of a powerful global community that allows for free speech and the democratization of world culture vs. the side that sees only a destructive force that cripples businesses, kills culture, promotes piracy and facilitates dysfunctional social behavior?

From there, I go with Winter and his producer Marc Schiller to a beautiful landmark home in Austin for a Cole Haan sponsored panel "What Drives You" where we join Forbes tech writer Andy Greenberg and Aparna Mukherjee, journalist and social media editor at McKinsey. Moderated by the smooth-talking Schiller, we move from the personal to the paranoid with Greenberg delving into the dark arts of the Internet, Mukharjeee's deep web musings, Winter's encryption advocacy and my popular culture/politics cross-over perspective. Take away: America's apparent complacency in the face of government spying is turning into active opposition. (See Sen. Diane Feinstein's recent reaming of the CIA for spying on her committee.)

Last but definitely not least, I go to the W Hotel for the premier of a trailer for a 40-minute documentary that will kick off a campaign for what may be one of the most significant undertakings launched at SXSW this year. Commissioned by American Express, the campaign and film aspire to do no less than re-imagine the banking system. According to Dan Schulman, Group President of Enterprise Growth at American Express, his company is moving from exclusive to inclusive, looking to help a large community of hard working people without access to traditional banking services. The documentary by Waiting for Superman and An Inconvenient Truth director Davis Guggenheim visibly moves the audience with its empathy. Schulman speaks eloquently of the challenges ahead and assures some gentle skeptics in the crowd of American Express' committment to the cause. To be released this summer, "Spent" will be used to spread the word in local communities as well as in Washington, with the hope and expectation that legislators will be similarly moved and respond to the challenge.

The day I leave, an Edward Snowden interview is streamed into Austin and thousands of journalists and tweeters go into action, spreading the word across the globe. Snowden is eloquent, measured, far from crazy or impetuous. To many here -- and across the globe -- he's a hero, a rock star who successfully took on the U.S. government and lifted the veil on U.S. spying. He says that when he took his job with the NSA he swore to uphold the Constitution. And when he saw that the government was violating the constitution, he had to take action. I'm glad he did.

Booty Call: 10 Items We're Dreaming Of This Month

Opinionated Limited-edition skate deck by Park Life x David Shrigley. $125 at parklifestore.com 

Geometry Shoes by Celine. At Celine, 870 Madison Ave., New York.

Folding Spoon and fork by Angie Terry. $65 each at lowellportland.com
SPIN "Beautiful, amore, gasp, eyes going into the top of the head and fluttering painting," plate by Damien Hirst. $50 at artwareeditions.com 

Latest Striped Dover Street Market T-shirt by Comme des Garçons. $105 at Dover Street Market, 160 Lexington Ave., New York.

Arty Calfskin portfolio by Chanel. $3,600 at select Chanel boutiques.

black-yellow-pumpkin_web.jpgCollectible "Pumpkin Soft Sculpture" by Yayoi Kusama for LittleCollector, Contemporary Art for Kids. $250 at littlecollector.com

Outdoorsy Semana Chair by David Weeks. $3,500 at davidweeksstudio.com

Flora/Fauna Limited-edition Audubon Field Series boxset by Best Made. $565 at bestmadeco.com

Ding A Ling Bells by Ted Muehling. $325- $800 at Ted Muehling, 52 White St., New York.

Sade_P.001_web.jpgAfrican Handmade African wax print umbrella by Marisol. $425 at marisols.org

Style Assistant: Bianca Bailey

Kate Moss and Cara Delevigne Join Forces

carakate.png Trench twins! For the first time ever, Kate Moss and Cara Delevingne are appearing in the  same fashion campaign. Burberry tapped the British beauties to star in a Marino Testino-photographed campaign for their as-yet-unnamed fragrance. Both models have been previously featured in the brand's campaigns -- Moss first appeared in a 1999 ad and Delevingne made her Burberry debut in 2010. Thanks to Cara's Instagram, we got this sneak preview, above.

Oh to be a fly on the wall when these two hang out...

The 5 Types of People We Can't Escape At SXSW


mannequin_sxsw.jpgThe Mannequin

The mannequin bought a full outfit from Free People just for the occasion. You'll find her standing in front of some sort of interesting graffiti, the Torchy's Taco truck or a classic brick wall, smoking Marlboro Lights. Don't let her aloof demeanor fool you, she's using every neuron in her brain to will that Teen Vogue street style photographer to walk by and snap a pic.

The Bored Guy

You'll most likely see this guy hanging around the back, checking his phone and sighing. He has all the energy of a homecoming chaperone, regardless of who's on stage. It may look like he's here on community service, but we all know that he must have paid hundreds of dollars for tickets. What a curious fellow!

everyshow_sxsw.JPGThe Guy Who Tries to Go to Every Show

The amount of bands performing is simply staggering. But that won't stop this guy from trying to see every single one of them. You can find him furiously cross-referencing a festival map (that looks like it's been through a World War) against his phone, muttering about the "12-minute walk from the Mohawk to the Doritos Locos showcase..."

bro_sxsw.jpgThe Casanova

These guys are here for one reason and one reason only: they saw a photo of people having sex in the crowd, and thought, "that could be me." The bands they're going to see are based less on their familiarity or appreciation, and more on which bands "chicks are all over." Despite everything, at least one of your friends is probably going to end up making out with him while rolling.
celebrity_sxsw.jpgThe Star of a TV Show You Don't Watch

Based on his impeccably-tailored clothes, perfectly-coiffed hair, and how you've seen him taking pictures with people, clearly this guy's a celebrity but you don't for the life of you know from where. It's up to you whether you live with your uncertainty or ask someone and risk looking like some out-of-touch grandparent. HINT: It's probably the guy from Grimm.

Kate Upton Named the New Face of Express

BFA_6865_800987.jpg(Photo by Matteo Prandoni/BFAnyc.com)

Kate Upton hangs up her trademark bikini this season to become the new face of Express. The fashion label tweeted today that they are naming the blonde bombshell their first celeb spokesperson in the past decade. Upton kicks off the collaboration tomorrow at Express' runway show in Miami and will star in the brand's forthcoming fall campaign. The 21-year-old model will also continue to be part of Sam Edelman's ad campaigns and was also recently featured in the 2014 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. Whew! It's been a busy year!

Two Dudes Cover All Of Beyoncé In Under Six Minutes


Here's two guys with really impressive vocal ranges covering the entire Beyoncé album in under six minutes. [via Hyper Vocal]

HOD1.jpgHOD4.jpgThanks to the wonderful world wide web, we now have House of Drake, a new Tumblr that creates memes combining images from House of Cards with some of Drake's most apropos lyrics. Hold on, I think we've found perfection.

This model on an apparel website really knows how to pump up the jam. [via Tastefully Offensive]

Screen Shot 2014-03-12 at 6.16.44 PM.png"Scuba diva." [via Pleated Jeans]

tumblr_n11k6ukBx71qeenqgo1_500.jpgThe Bruce is Loose! [via F You No F Me]

Here's an oddly hypnotic video of Arnold Schwarzenegger going around in a tank and crushing things. [via Buzzfeed]

tumblr_mh18nz0Hi11qzol4do1_500.pngTrue dat. [via Afternoon Snooze Button]

tumblr_n29v4f36Dw1qe0wclo1_500.jpgYou've been forewarned. [via The Clearly Dope]

10 Reasons We're Watching 300: Rise of an Empire This Weekend

intro.pngWe had absolutely no interest in going to see 300: Rise of an Empire when it opened this past weekend but after hearing reviews from some, uh, reliable sources (read: our friends who were coerced by their boyfriends to go), we've changed our minds. Here's 10 reasons why we've decided to give it a shot.
  3001.png 1. Is it getting hot in here?

3002.png 2. Yes, yes it is.

 3003.png 3. Jesus, take the wheel. 

3004.png 4. God, they are even hot close up!

3005.png 5. Seriously.

3006.png 6. Boom.

3007.png 7. Swoon.

3008.png 8. Most. Elaborate. Jockstrap. Ever. I like it.  

3009.png 9. YES.

30010.png 10. Yup, I'm sold.
 ladyboner.png Bonus: We definitely have a lady boner for Eva Green. Damn, girl.

All photos courtesy of 300: Rise of an Empire's official website.

Spring Break Cocktails: A Definitive Ranking

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.05.38 PM.png10. SoCo and Lime Shot
When you were at Mizzou and Trevor from the lacrosse team bought you a SoCo and Lime shot, it basically meant you were getting a bid from Sig Ep. Too bad you didn't go to Mizzou.

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.06.17 PM.png9. Sex on the Beach
When you're 14, this is what you imagine you'll be drinking as a 20-year-old on spring break in Acapulco.

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.05.00 PM.png8. Vodka and Sprite in a 20 oz. Sprite Bottle
It's portable, it's cheap, and it's going to get you hammered because Stephanie from Gamma Phi mixes 'em strong. Good night and good luck.

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.00.24 PM.png7. Strawberry Daiquiri
In theory strawberry daiquiris are delicious but in practice they're not. Unless you're somewhere fancy, most of the time these things come out of a machine that your local Señor Frogs has probably had since 1993. And the last time they cleaned it out was probably 1994.

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.10.10 PM.png6. Bud Heavy out of a Beer Bong
U-S-A! U-S-A!

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.07.14 PM.png5. Tequila Sunrise
The first time you ever tried one was when you were 13 and you went on a family vacation with your mom and her new boyfriend Steve and Steve let you take a sip of his. You're not really sure if you like them much because Steve was kind of a dick but when all the rest of your friends are drinking rum and Cokes, you order one of these because you're sophisticated

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.02.10 PM.png4. Margarita
I can't decide which shorthand is more offensive -- margs or 'ritas -- but who cares because margaritas are so fun and festive. Actually, scratch that. You know who cares? Your blood sugar levels. Especially when you chase a couple of these calorie bombs with a trough's-worth of chicken fingers and loaded nachos for dinner. But we're not gonna food shame here. This is a safe space.   

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.13.10 PM.png3. Tequila Shot
It's a great one-way ticket to public make out-land. 

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.01.33 PM.png2. Piña Colada
There is nothing wrong with a dessert in a cup that tastes like sunscreen.

Screen shot 2014-03-09 at 3.02.46 PM.png1. Corona Bucket
Cold. Cheap. Classic. And you have the added lime wedge bonus, which can double as a cheap way to add some sun-kissed streaks in your hair when you run your fingers through it and forget to shower. Hey, it happens.