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Jay Pharoah Parodies Kanye with "I Am a Dog"


God, Jay Pharoah is good with impressions. He's got Barack Obama and Jay Z down pat and his latest, "I Am a Dog," is a hybrid parody of several recent Kanye West hits. The video parodies the lyrics from "I Am a God" along with the Rick Owens-meets-S&M dungeon master visuals from "Black Skinhead," and it works on every level. Pharoah spits funny lyrics about a day in the life of a pup with that exact Kanye quality of being angry and serious and sneering and arrogant all at once. He also commits to full-on dog-iness with tenacity. The only problem: "I Am a Dog" video could've used a croissant reference. Just sayin'.

Here's Bill Murray Dressed as Liberace on David Letterman


Goddammit, why does David Letterman have to be celebrating his 20th anniversary and having Bill Murray on dressed like Liberace while Time Warner cable CONTINUES to hold New York hostage with hot garbage from their Starz Kids' lineup instead of CBS? Bill had a tiny dog and everything! [PopCultureBrain]

Yes, yes and YES. Here's Geena Davis, whose mouth-full-of-marbles drawl is imprinted onto the brains of anyone born between 1978 and 1988 (bow down to the master Blake Lively), showing off her real-life archery skills in a Funny of Die video that also features her in her A League of Their Own uniform and has something or other to do with Davis' Institute on Gender in Media. It's perfect. Miss you, Geena. [TheMarySue]

BStrkJlCYAA1StK.jpg_large.jpgAskdfjgh, Lori Loughlin tweeted this photo of her with Ashley Olsen at John Stamos' 50th birthday. Oh to have been invited! You know Mr. Bear tried to roll in with an entourage 20 deep and locked himself in the bathroom all night. [The Superficial/ Pic via Twitter]

Instant mood-booster: this video of a deeply adorable baby whistling. Very cool guy. [Ratsoff]

joeyfatonefart.png CASE CLOSED. [ImWithKanye]

ross-not-cool-full-650x866.jpegDavid Schwimmer tore down his townhouse in the East Village one year before it was to receive landmark status. His neighbors left this spray-painted outside his house. [Uproxx]
 tumblr_ms598ezjc11s1szpho1_250.gif Eww, luxury SUV door handles! But I will sit my bare g-stringed ass in a Barclay's center seat for 3 hours. [TheClearlyDope]

Ozzy-Osbourne-as-an-Easter-Bunny.jpgJust in case you're in need of a new Twitter icon/ ideas for nightmares tonight: Here's Ozzy Osbourne dressed as the Easter Bunny. [ThisIsNotPorn]

tumblr_ms9k3jNpTI1rjcfxro1_500.gif 3-day weekend, wut WUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT. Morning Funnies'll see you Tuesday. [TheClearlyDope]

Kathryn Hahn's Star Turn In Afternoon Delight

katherinehahn_afternoondelight_tile.jpgWith scene-stealing parts in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Anchorman and Girls, actress Kathryn Hahn is known for playing the hapless best friend or the harried working mother. This month, Hahn transitions from character actress to leading lady in Jill Soloway's Afternoon Delight as Rachel, a Silver Lake housewife who makes a misguided attempt to help a stripper named McKenna (Juno Temple). Here, we talk to the actress about her star turn.

Was it difficult for you to land this role?

When I was sent the script, I felt like I knew Rachel inside and out, but I had to fight my ass off because I had never been asked to carry a movie. I had a Skype session with Jill [Soloway] and I could barely speak. I had never been as inarticulate. Afterward, I sent her a long email saying, "I know you have to fall in love with your Rachel and I promise we'll fall in love!"

Why do you think you connected with Rachel so much?

I'm a mom and have so much empathy for that crazy sense of purpose-lessness that happens when your child is a little bit older and doesn't need you as much. Helping McKenna gives her a purpose.

And, aside from giving her a purpose, why do you think Rachel is initially drawn to McKenna?

When Rachel meets McKenna in the strip club, so much is at play. She wants to mother her, she wants to fuck her, she wants to be her, she wants to save her. She is captured wholly by this person in every way. Helping McKenna gives her a purpose and Rachel can't see how selfish and self-absorbed she's being because McKenna doesn't necessarily need saving in any way.

Have you ever tried to "fix" or help someone who maybe didn't need it?

I think I'm a little too old for that nonsense now but in my twenties, there was a lot of that thinking like, "I'm the only one to save you or help you. I can change you." You're inevitably disappointed because it never goes well and that's energy spent that you'll never be able to get back. It's like from When Harry Met Sally when Sally tells Carrie Fisher's character, "He's never gonna leave her" and Carrie goes, "You're right, you're right. I know you're right." But she goes back to him anyway.

At one point in the film, Rachel mentions having once wanted to be a war correspondent. If you weren't acting, what career would you want to have?

I would love to travel be some sort of photojournalist. That would be amazing -- that is, if I knew how to work a camera in any way. I'm awful. I can barely work my phone.

Your character takes booty dance lessons from Juno Temple's character. Are you a good dancer?

I am an awful dancer. I wish I was a gifted dancer and could have that mind- body connection. But that's not what's happening. I can barely touch my toes.

Photo copyright (c) 2013 By Afternoon Delight, LLC.

Our Guide to Labor Day in New York City


LaborDayFonz.gifThree-day weekend, whattup! Even if your invitation to the Hamptons/Fire Island/Martha's Vineyard never materialized and you're staying in the city, there's a million fun things to do in New York over the holiday weekend. From concerts to parties to art shows and comedy, here's our guide on where to find the best Labor Day good-time vibes Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday.


ART: PLETHORA: The Harvest / An Art Salon
If you're feeling more cerebral then celebratory, join artists Lia Chavez, Linnéa Spransy and Maggie Hazen as they discuss their current exhibition at Soapbox Gallery with artist and former Warhol Superstar ULTRA VIOLET, Wall Street Journal's Kelly Crow and Jamie Lauren Zimmerman of Meditation Medicine. Make sure to catch the exhibit beforehand -- it closes tonight.
AOL, 770 Broadway, 6th Floor, Manhattan; Friday, August 30 from 6pm - 9pm

The L.A.-by-way-of-Portland dance rockers (and avid hikers) headline a show tonight at Music Hall of Williamsburg. Wear comfortable footwear -- you're bound to be dancing all night long.
Music Hall of Williamsburg, 66 N. 6th St., Brooklyn; 8pm (doors) / 9pm (show), $16 advance/$18 day of, buy tickets here

PARTY: HEAD ON: Blondie vs. Fleetwood Mac at Bell House
Do you have a "Heart of Glass" or "Big Love"? Join DJs Brian Blackout and Spoolwork for this month's battle of the bands. At midnight they play the best of Blondie and Fleetwood Mac, you cheer, dance, bow down to the baddest blonde bitches in rock history and go crazy to determine who goes home victorious.
The Bell House, 149 7th St., Brooklyn; Friday, August 30 at 10:30pm

BURLESQUE: Storybook Burlesque Presents: "DER WAL -- a Moby Dick Kabarett"
The Storybook ladies are taking on Herman Melville's literary classic with a vessel, fishing nets, and plenty of pasties.
Sideshows by the Seashore, Coney Island, 1208 Surf Avenue, Brooklyn; 10:00pm, Tickets are $15 and can be purchased here

MUSIC: Bat For Lashes
Woozy pop enchantress Bat For Lashes (née Natasha Khan) headlines a show at Webster Hall with San Diego-based post-punk group Barbarian opening. You can expect to hear Khan play many of the beautifully melancholic tracks off her 2012 standout, The Haunted Man.
Webster Hall, 125 E 11th St., New York; 7pm, $30, buy tickets here

PARTY: Rinsed: Welcome Home at Secret Location in Brooklyn
Buy your ticket. Receive an email with a location by 9 pm on Friday. Go. Dance They're celebrating the return of DJs Jacques Greene and Cashmere Cat to NYC, so it's sure to be one helluva time.
TBD, Brooklyn; 11:55pm, Tickets are $20 and can be purchased here

FESTIVAL: Electric Zoo
New York's premiere electronic music festival is the perfect place for partiers to dust off their best day-glo outfits and get lost in the thumping music on Randall's Island. This year's featured artists include Avicii, Zedd and Steve Aoki.
Randall's Island Park, Randall's Island; Fri, Sat, Sun, Get tickets here.


PARTY: Dizzy World
Nightlife and fashion mavens Ms Fitz and Trey LaTrash host Dizzy World, Dizzyland's one-year anniversary extravaganza at East Williamsburg's The Paper Box. Expect a glittery, Tumblr-ified "who's who" of the Bushwick nightlife scene: drag queens, performance artists, musicians, fashion designers, cute kids...and puppets (or so we hear). Pictureplane, House of Ladosha and Lil Internet will provide the night's soundtrack and entertainment. Shit's gonna get trippy.
The Paper Box, 17 Meadow St., Brooklyn; 10pm-4am, $10

MUSIC/ART: Omar Souleyman / Bobb Trimble / 75 Dollar Bill / Steve Gunn at Pioneer Works

Headlined by Syrian Musical legend Omar Souleyman, this outdoor concert kicks off Issue Project Room's two-month long tenth anniversary celebration -- Ten Years Alive on the Infinite Plain. The event features a line-up of psychedelia and space music, some electric guitar, and a blues set.
Pioneer Works, 159 Pioneer St., Brooklyn; Saturday, August 31 from 3pm-8pm, Tickets are $15 and can be purchased here

PARTY: Labor Day Party at Playland Motel
Hotel, motel, Playyyyland. The newly opened Rockaways hot spot is hosting a three-day party over the holiday weekend. With drinks and eats provided by the owners' Williamsburg mainstays Rosarito Fish Shack and El Almacen, a strong musical lineup and hotel rooms on deck, you could be there 36 hours straight.
Playland Motel, 97-20 Rockaway Beach Blvd., Rockaway Park, Brooklyn; Sat, Sun, Mon from 3pm until late

MUSIC: Friends at Glasslands
DIY dance-punk group Friends will be playing the South Williamsburg warehouse-cum-gallery and concert space. The five-piece band has been making waves with their gender-bending hits for years, and they'll be joined by Greatest Hits and art-punk outfit Haribo.
Glasslands Gallery, 289 Kent Ave., Brooklyn; Saturday, August 31 at 8pm, Get tickets HERE.

PARTY: Warm Up at MoMA PS1
We're only two weeks away from the end of PS1's summer concert series so they're bringing out the big guns: Saturday's acts include IO ECHO, Lil Silva and Sam Valenti IV.
MoMA PS1, 22-25 Jackson Ave., Long Island City; Saturday, August 31 from 3-9pm, Tickets are $15 advanced, $18 at the door.

SHOPPING: Sale at Dalaga
Scope digital print maxi skirts, chambray tops, and wedge sandals on sale for up to 80% off at Greenpoint's Dalaga.
Dalaga, 150 Franklin St., Brooklyn

COMEDY: Novelization: A Reading Series Based On the Original Motion Picture
Ever wanted to see Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey reimagined as a dramatic reading? Comedians Chris Gethard, Eliot Glazer, Sue Smith and Sweet Soubrette will do just that, reading scenes from that flick along with '80s classic The Goonies and Total Recall (unconfirmed if it's the Arnold Schwarzenegger or Colin Farrell version).
Union Hall, 702 Union St., Brooklyn; 7:30pm, $7 tickets here

PARTY: Sex on the Beach
Jay Anthony and Robot MoonJuice are hosting a fête on the beach featuring loud music, boozy beverages and lots of glistening, sun-tanned bodies. Bring some sunscreen and call 917.592.2158 when you get off the A train at Rockaway Blvd to be shuttled straight to the festivities.
Rockaway Beach, Queens; Saturday August 31, $5 for women and $10 for men

MUSIC: Thurston Moore at Union Pool's Summer Thunder series
Stake your spot next to Union Pool's taco truck early because their next party in their Summer Thunder series is a doozy, headlined by none other than Sonic Youth's Thurston Moore playing with a trio that also includes Nate Wooley and Ryan Sawyer.
Union Pool, 484 Union Ave., Brooklyn; starts at 2pm, bands play later in the day

SHOPPING: 40% off at Amarcord Vintage
Just in time for fashion week, sift through vintage baubles, coats, designer dresses, shoes and accessories on sale for 40% off at Amarcord Vintage.
Amarcord Vintage, 252 Lafayette St., New York and 223 Bedford Ave., Brooklyn


SHOPPING: Ridgewood's Artisan "Pop-Up" Flea Market
Head to the Greater Ridgewood Youth Council to mosey around the flea market and find all sorts of goodies like handcrafted beer, Indian home decor and trompe-l'oeil totes made by artists and crafts-makers scattered around the New York area.
Greater Ridgewood Youth Council, 59-03 Summerfield St., Queens; Sat. and Sun. from 11am-5pm.

PARTY: Mister Sunday
The weekly outdoor dance party thrown by Mister Saturday Night is sure to have the usual barrage of dazed, dancing folks eyeing the disco ball hanging from the trees and being drawn like moths to the taco truck. Everyone might be a bit more hungover than usual because there's a Mister Saturday Night party happening the night before.
Gowanus Grove, 400 Carroll Street, Brooklyn; Sunday, September 1, 3-9pm.

UCB will spend a night performing long-form improv in their own theater with "special guests" from SNL, 30 Rock and The Colbert Report. Since every great comedian seems to have been a part of UCB at some point or another, that means you have to go.
UCB Theater, 307 W. 26th St., New York; Sunday, September 1 at 7:30 and 9:30, Tickets for the 7:30 show are sold out, the 9:30 show is free and first-come, first-served

PARTY: Horse Meat Disco at Cielo
South London's big gay party, Horse Meat Disco, is back again for Labor Day. Hosted by Marco Ovando, Occupy the Disco and Cameron Cooper, it's sure to feature a lot of hot sweaty gays and remixed disco beats in one of NYC's biggest clubs.
Cielo, 18 Little W. 12th St., New York; Sunday, September 1, Tickets are $15 advanced, $25 at the door.

MOVIE: The Goonies at Habana Outpost
Munch on Cuban sandwiches and grilled corn while watching Chunk do the truffle shuffle during a screening of eternally wonderful flick, The Goonies.
Habana Outpost, 757 Fulton St., Brooklyn, 8pm, free

FOOD: Rub-a-Grub at Do Or Dine
The wily culinary wizards at Do Or Dine team up again with Sound Liberation Front for this backyard cookout featuring three food courses paired with three DJ sets. The menu will include an assortment of appetizers, bloody marys, and a giant roast pig and, once you're good and stuffed (not to mention sloshed), you can head next door to One Last Shag bar for some after party vibes.
Do Or Dine Backyard, 1108 Bedford Ave., Brooklyn; 2pm-10pm, $20 advance ticket/$35 VIP ticket, available here


COMPETITION: Williamsburg Spelling Bee at Pete's Candy Store
The monthly spelling bee is back. Test your linguistic talents against 14 other contests while taking back a few. Get there at 7pm to sign up -- first come, first serve. 
Pete's Candy Store, 709 Lorimer St., Brooklyn; Monday, September 2 at 7:30pm

SHOPPING: Barney's Warehouse Sale -- up to 75% off
The word on the street is that this year's sale is menswear-heavy, but have no fear ladies. If you're in the market for a great pair of pants or jeans on the cheap, don't miss out. With brands like Haider Ackerman, Acne, rag & bone and J Brand starting as low as $49, this is a don't miss.
Metropolitan Pavilion, 125 W. 18th St., Manhattan; Fri-Sun, 10am-8pm; Mon, 10am-7pm (closes Monday, September 2)

FESTIVAL: The West Indian American Day Carnival
It's the 46th Annual festival of Caribbean Pride and Culture, and what better way to celebrate than a colorful parade along Brooklyn's Eastern Parkway? It's known as New York's "greatest show on earth" and it'll be filled with music, dancing and delicious, delicious food.
Eastern Parkway, from Utica Avenue to Grand Army Plaza, Brooklyn. Monday, September 2, 11am-6pm.

SHOPPING: Scoop NYC Warehouse Sale -- up to 85% off
Here's the scoop: if your looking for shoes, this is the spot. With Rupert Sanderson sandals for $220 and rag & bone boots for $175, you're sure to find something. Big name ready-to-wear designers to note include DVF, 3.1 Phillip Lim, Derek Lam, Suno, Helmut Lang and Marc Jacobs. If you prefer, stay at home and shop the sale online.
430 W. 14th St., Manhattan; Fri, Sat, Mon, 11am-8pm; Sun 11am-7pm (closes Monday, September 2)

PARTY: Fool's Gold Day Off
One of the best -- and rowdiest -- free concerts/ragers of the year returns on Labor Day with sets by Fool's Gold artists like Danny Brown and Duck Sauce, along with A$AP Ferg, Migos, #Been #Trill, Nick Catchdubs, Run the Jewels (El-P and Killer Mike) + more. Expect big surprise guests, big crowds, and big bass. An after-party will be held at Brooklyn Bowl. Show up early.
Williamsburg Park, 50 Kent Ave., Brooklyn; 2pm-10pm

GIF by Isabel Alcantara

Elettra Wiedemann on Judging the Vendys and Why You Should Never Eat a Banana Near Her

BFA_6180_711110.jpgModel Elettra Wiedemann is gearing up to film another season of her Vogue.com cooking show Elettra's Goodness, and has also been chosen as a judge for the upcoming Vendy Awards. The Vendys -- known as the Oscars of street food -- benefit the Street Vendor Project, an organization that stands up for vendors' rights. It's the type of cause the socially and environmentally conscious Wiedemann has long held dear. Plus, she loves to eat! We sat down and talked to Wiedemann about being a judge on Iron Chef, getting priced out of Manhattan and why you should never, ever eat a banana near her.

Is this your first time judging anything?

I think it is. Oh, wait, I was a judge on Iron Chef once. I did two days back-to-back on that show and learned the trick is to not eat the whole dish, just one bite of everything.

Are you nervous at all about judging the Vendys?

I'll be gorging on food all day so it won't be that nerve-racking. I am a little nervous about overeating, though. I think there are 28 nominees, so I'll just try to eat 28 bites.

Is there anything you won't eat?

I don't love fruit. I never have. I don't like the texture, and the taste just doesn't do it for me.

All fruit?

All fruit. I can't stand bananas. My husband has to eat them away from me. The other day I had to literally walk around someone on the sidewalk eating one, to get away from the smell. If I'm really starving I might be able to get down a clementine.

I can imagine the battles you had with your parents when you were a kid.

Yeah, it was a battle, but I won in the end. I was totally adamant about it. I'm a super-healthy eater and get my nutrition from vegetables.

As a model, is it hard to have a healthy relationship with food?

When I was younger it probably was, struggling with my body image. My personal journey is that I got sick of thinking about it all the time. It was boring. I'm so active. I compete in IRONMAN triathlons so I kind of stopped thinking about it. I do all my races with my dad. Everything in moderation, including moderation.

Are you doing your pop-up restaurant, Goodness, again for Fashion Week in September?

No. It was great as a concept and people really loved it, but it was really difficult to pull together. It was a shitload of work for not much money. I kind of jumped into the whole pop-up thing without knowing what to expect. Restaurants are one of the toughest industries in the world. I don't want to do that to myself again.

Your husband, James Marshall, is still involved in the West Village restaurant Whitehall, right?

He's an investor, he's not there on a day-to-day basis.

Episodes of Elettra's Goodness usually run under five minutes. Would you like to do a full-length food show?

I'm having so much fun doing it with Vogue, I don't know about expanding it. If someone told me ten years ago I'd be getting a degree from the London School of Economics or have a cooking show, I wouldn't have believed it. Life keeps surprising me. We'll see where it goes.

Since your grandmother, Ingrid Bergman, was Swedish, do you have any Swedish recipes that have been handed down?

I tried to do gravlax last year and it was a total disaster. My attempt to get my Swedish genes to resonate in my body didn't work. I'm born and raised in New York and I feel more American than anything else, or more of a New Yorker than anything else.

You live in the West Village, right?

We're moving to Brooklyn soon. We bought a house. It's really old and needs some work. We got priced out of Manhattan, and that's the truth. What we wanted doesn't exist in the city anymore -- a downtown vibe, more space and a park nearby. I think we found it in Fort Greene. I'm super-excited about the move.

Any street vendor whose food you're particularly excited about trying?

I've always tried to get to Cinnamon Snail and failed to find them. I'm going to stalk them.

Here's the First Episode of Issa Rea's New Web Series "The Choir"


Woo hoo! Awkward Black Girl creator and PAPER person Issa Rae is back with a new web series! The show is called The Choir and centers around a group of church singers whose gossipy, flirty, and dramatic ways pose a problem for their church's poorly attended -- and dwindling -- services. Particular characters aren't introduced in the first episode, but the music is great, and it's worth it to see the zonked out guy snoozing when he's supposed to be handing out flyers and to see the lead singer make everyone uncomfortable with her, uh, enthusiasm for singing about Jesus. Watch above.

[via Jezebel]

The Best, Worst and Weirdest of the Week

Screen Shot 2013-08-30 at 4.29.42 PM.pngBest "Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper Couture Look": This ensemble worn by Busta Rhymes at the VMAs. -- Abby Schreiber [Photo by Nicholas Hunt/Patrick McMullan.com]

Best 'Oh,God, Brooklyn, What Are You Doing' Piece of the Week:
This New Yorker article on The Gun Club, an "advanced-movement studio" and "fitness speakeasy" (a.k.a. a room with some weights) that some totally ripped dude is running out of his Clinton Hill apartment. -- Elizabeth Thompson

1377189204_juicy_j_tweet.jpgWorst Scholarship: Juicy J and WorldStar HipHop's $50,000 scholarship awarded to the "best chick that can twerk." -- Max Kessler

Best Dog Rave of the Week: This dog rave! Drop the beat. Because you are a dog. -- E.T.

Most On-Point Critique of the September Issues: Eric Wilson's, written in "Letters to the Editor" style, addresses some of the most annoying problems with this month's issues of Vogue, Harper's Bazaar and W. The best line? "Oh, I do simultaneously adore and envy everything about Elisabeth von Thurn und Taxis, but I'm not sure I need to know any more about her brother Albert's surprise birthday party on the rolling family estate in Hohenberg beyond its theme of 'lederhosen/Versace/Howard Carpendale/sweat pants,' thank you very much."  So. Much. Shade. -- M.K.

Best Name for a Voguing Competition Category We Didn't Know Existed: Butch-Queen Up In Pumps. -- A.S.

robin-thicke-grope-08302013-400x470.jpgWorst Robin Thicke Moment of the Week: No, it's not his performance with Miley at the VMAs. It's this picture that someone named Lana Scolaro posted of Thicke seriously grabbing her ass while they get their photo taken. Ugh, you're married, STOP IT. -- M.K.

Most Grasping at Slut-Shames of the Week: The inventor of the Foam Finger telling Fox News that Miley Cyrus' VMA performance "took an honorable icon that is seen in sporting venues everywhere and degraded it." Sure thing, buddy. -- E.T.

Screen Shot 2013-08-30 at 4.14.36 PM.pngBest Nasty Neighbor Note of the Week: This graffiti left outside of David Schwimmer's East Village townhouse! Schwimmer actually tore down the original brownstone he purchased, a year before it was to be declared a landmark, hence his neighbor's displeasure. Maurice weeps! -- E.T.

Best Fashion News of the Week: Converse is doing a collab with Margiela. -- A.S.

Best Twitter: Diane Keaton's. -- M.K.

We're Looking for Interns!

thumbs-up-computer-kid-gif.gifAre you a feisty Pisces who's an intrepid World Wide Web explorer and a pop culture junkie? Then we want to hear from you because we're looking for interns! (And don't worry, you don't have to be a Pisces. We'll take any Zodiac sign besides Libra because Mr. Mickey's a Libra and one is enough.)

We are currently looking for the following interns:

Web Editorial
We're looking for a quick-learner with advanced research skills who's also pop culture obsessed. Good writing skills are a must and transcription experience is a plus. Web editorial interns will be responsible for assisting in researching online stories, transcribing interviews, and occasionally pitching and writing their own blogs. A familiarity with Paper is important (please don't email us asking for an internship at VICE).
Please send a resume and brief cover letter to abbys@papermag.com.

Business Development
The Business Development team is looking for organized, creative thinkers with an interest in learning about brands' marketing initiatives and how they can fit in with PAPER. Ideal applicants are proactive self-starters with good problem-solving and trouble-shooting skills who will bring positive vibes to the team -- bad 'tudes need not apply.
Please send a resume and brief cover letter to kates@papermag.com.

Events, Promotion and Fashion
We're looking for savvy, quick-learning folks to help out with everything from events to photo shoots. Enthusiasm and a flexible attitude are a must, a love of dogs is a plus (we usually have 2-3 scampering around the office).
Please send a resume and brief cover letter to kellyg@papermag.com.

The Trailer for Kill Your Darlings Is Here and It's Dramatique


The official trailer for Kill Your Darlings is here and it looks très dramatique. The film follows Allen Ginsberg (played by a very Brooklyn twink-y-looking Daniel Radcliffe) through his affair with Lucien Carr (Dane DeHaan) and his introduction to important Beat figures like Jack Keroauc (Jack Huston), William S. Burroughs (Ben Foster) and David Kammerer (played by Michael C. Hall with a big beard). Spoiler alert, everyone: despite how much you want to, you won't see any steamy gay kisses or sexy-sex sex scenes in this one. Instead the trailer shifts from "jazz! opium! tweed!" beat-era porn to an psychological-thriller drama with Kammerer becoming obsessed with Carr and Carr subsequently murdering him. When a trailer seems to be about two totally different films, that's never a good sign. The Beats wouldn't have abided by that sort of narrative imposition. Watch above.

[via Towleroad]

Chef Leif Hedendal on Cross-Country Train Cooking and Ed Ruscha's Cactus Omelet

leif_juliebesonen.JPGChef Leif Hedendal

On September 6th artist Doug Aitken's nomadic happening-cum-public art project, Station to Station, starts its 22-day journey from New York to California. The train will have a changing cast of characters and site-specific stops in places like Pittsburgh, Chicago and Winslow, AZ. On board for the project are Savages, Patti Smith, Thurston Moore, Beck, Cat Power, Ed Ruscha, James Turrell, Nam June Paik, Catherine Opie and many more too numerous to mention. Food, and lots of it, will be needed to keep everybody from going off the rails. San Francisco-based chef (and one of our 2013 Beautiful People) Leif Hedendal, 35, worked with Alice Waters to curate local ingredients along the way. He talked to us by phone before taking off on the adventure.

How did you get involved in Station to Station?

Elise Van Middelem, the artistic manager, came to an event I cooked for called An Exhibition in Your Mouth, a dinner put on by Ben Kinmont in San Francisco. She said that ever since that night she had me in the back of her mind.

Can you explain An Exhibition in Your Mouth?

It was a really interesting project, a tasting menu based on artists' recipes. The only way to experience it was by eating it.

Such as?

One of the dishes was based on a work by the artist Geoff Hendricks, called Clouds. I made ten different flavors of mashed potatoes on one plate, with flavors like vanilla, almond, orange, mint and bay leaf.

Do you know how many people you'll be cooking for on the train?

It'll fluctuate between 100 and 125, depending on the leg.

I have a feeling the kitchen is going to be really confining.

I can roll with the punches. I've been stuck cooking in broom closets at galleries.

What have you done to prepare?

Not only am I the train chef, I'm the food co-curator with Alice Waters. We built this yurt to bring along with us. Local, Slow Food-type producers will be vendors in each of the cities so they'll have this ready-made booth we designed. I've also been organizing with Ed Ruscha to make a cactus omelet dinner for the stops in Arizona. He has the recipe.

So you haven't been able to practice making it yet.

I'll be doing it on the fly. My goal is to serve food that's almost entirely local from the cities we're passing through, plus humanely raised meats from small producers. I'm making it difficult for myself.

Have you ever done anything like this before?

Nope. I'm an independent chef and do a lot of catering and work with artists and art spaces instead of working in a restaurant.


I like to set my own hours and be more creative. I've worked in restaurants and didn't enjoy it that much. You're always doing the same thing, and the pay and schedule isn't that good. It didn't suit my personality.

What are you looking forward to most on the trip?

I'm really excited to go to some of these cities I've never been to before, especially Minneapolis -- and Santa Fe because of all the great artists there. And I'm excited to cook for Cat Power.

How much staff will you have on board?

Three people will be helping me in the kitchen. Not Alice Waters. I'll be serving lunches and dinners, not cooking 24/7.

What about passengers with dietary restrictions?

Just a few vegetarians, not too much to worry about. The Congos are Rastafarian and have an Ital diet, which means vegan and no salt. That could be a little bit of a challenge, but they're just riding the last leg from LA to Oakland.

Will the meals that you'll be cooking on the train be art in some way?

Conceptual art, in that I'm going to be sourcing in each city and serving it as we leave so we can think about what that means.

M.I.A.'s New Single Is...Mediocre

a5ff562f.gifM.I.A. has been planning to release her new record Matangi for a while now and it's finally coming out on November 5th. In anticipation of the release, the singer released a new, presumably happier single called "Come Walk With Me" that's a departure for her on several levels: the lyrics are indeed more positive; her voice, which is usually used to add structure to a banging rhythm -- but doesn't do the grunt work on most of her tracks -- is out front and center; and for the first minute or so, the beat is standard pop fare, the kind of slow-electro-build-up that Katy Perry singles are made of.

So, how good is "Come Walk with Me?" Unfortunately, the answer is: pretty lackluster. It being M.I.A., a more original, spastic rhythm does emerge and begs for some good ol' fashioned rump shaking. But no matter how much splicing and synth is thrown into the mix, her singing sounds really, really un-enthused and lacks the energy her pessimistic tracks bring in abundance. We're always glad to hear more from her, but here's hoping the rest of her album ups the attitude. Listen below.

TV on the Radio's New Video: The Story of a Misunderstood Space Rock


While we wait for news of their next LP, art-rockers TV on the Radio have released a new single and video, "Mercy", on bandmate Dave Sitek's label, Federal Prism. Using stop-motion animation, the video is pretty cute; the plot centers on a little alien rock critter who crashes into Earth and tries, but fails, to blend in. The whole thing will make you want to go "Aw" even as the music makes you want to thrash. Watch above.

[via Pitchfork]

Don't Twerk Near Fire, Kids


We're not of the "people hurting themselves = funny" camp, so, kids, consider this video more of a PSA about the dangers of making sexy twerking videos for your boyfriend near open flames. The girl in the video, Caitilin Heller, included a :) in the video's youTube description, so we're assuming all is A-OK. Oof. [Gawker]

Part 1 of the 5-part Parks and Rec season 5 blooper reel. See the rest here, ya herd. [PopCultureBrain]

tumblr_ms0v7ll9OV1s04lx3o1_500.jpgBest/worst return address ever? [AfternoonSnoozeButton]

Wait for it.....[RatsOff]

sltohstripper.pngThink we found our look for the rest of Fashion Week. [FYeahDementia]

So la da di da di
We like to party
Dancing with Poultry
Doing whatever we want. [FYeahDementia]

The Jeremy Scott x Adidas FW13 Video is a Trip


Jeremy Scott's fw13 printastic collection for Adidas is a mirage of neon colors, futuristic florals and black and white graphics fit for a Magic Eye book This ongoing unisex collaboration only gets better and better. The collection's video look book nails the visual interpretation of the trippy prints. Set to MNDR's 'Sooner or Later' and directed by Ben Mor, it's a kaleidoscopic mash up of models Kozue Akimoto and Simonas Pham featuring flower bombs, flying dollar signs and confetti explosions. Enjoy.  

Psst! Screaming Mimi's Is Having a Big Sidewalk Sale

Psst! Our friends over at Screaming Mimi's are having a massive sidewalk sale this weekend, offering goodies like vintage housewares, display props and assorted curios from their archives. And you can find treats for as low as a $1! One clam! That's, like, half a subway ride.

Screaming Mimi's is located at 382 Lafayette St., New York City

The Double Trailer: 2 Jesse Eisenbergs, 1 Weird Movie


If you've ever wanted to see a creepy film where Jesse Eisenberg plays both of the leads, The Double is the movie for you. Directed by Richard Ayoade (who played Moss on The IT Crowd) the film is an adaptation of the Dostoevsky novella of the same name, and as such is sure to depict a dark and brooding descent into god knows what. In the novella, government worker Yakov Petrovich Golyadkin goes crazy imagining that a doppelganger is taking over his life. While we'll forever have a crush on Richard Ayoade, we having nothing but over-the-top eyerolls for a trailer with two smug-faced, interviewer-badgering New Yorker column-writing Jessie Eisenbergs in a Dostoevsky adaptation, so kudos to those who will be able to sit through the entire movie. MICHAEL CERA 4 LYFE. Watch above.

[via Vulture]

AndrewAndrew Insta-Review The Miracle Play


The Miracle Play
, indeed. With a limited run and a far-flung, "secret" theater location in Long Island City, it may take miracle for your to see it. Will it change your life or can you wait until it walks on water across the East River to somewhere easier to find? Find out in our full review.

PAPER's New York Fashion Week Party Guide


FashionWeekGuide1.gifIt's New York Fashion Week once again kids, so remember to gently wipe your Adidas shower sandals clean and assemble your own high fashion takes on schlubby sportswear. For the next ten days, we'll be keeping track of the best parties happening around New York City and, although though most of them are invite-only, we'll use our scientific-ish methods to calculate your odds of getting in. Read below and apologize to your livers in advance.

theophilusbrendaninvite.jpgALREADY HAPPENED

WHAT: Surface to Air x Theophilus London
EXPECT: In anticipation of their new collaboration with Theophilus London, Parisian sportswear staple Surface to Air will be hosting a party with music by Brendan Fallis and an intimate performance by Travis $cott.
WHERE: Surface to Air, 27 Mercer Street
WHEN: Wednesday, September 4; 8pm
RVSP: Invite Only


WHAT: Party.Drank.Fashion.Drank.
EXPECT: With performances by Kendrick Lamar and #Benn #Trill, this party is sure to be a doozy. We'd advise to get there early, park yourself at the bar and prepare to elbow a fair share of fans on a mission to get to the front.
WHERE: The Loading Dock at Milk Studios, 449 W. 14th St.
WHEN: Wednesday, September 4; 9pm
RVSP: Invite Only

Screen Shot 2013-09-04 at 2.57.39 PM.png ALREADY HAPPENED

WHAT: The Zady Launch Party
EXPECT: Zady, a new, ethically-minded e-commerce site, is celebrating its launch with a party that will be full of do-gooder designers like Farah Malik and A Peace Treaty co-founder Schoscha Wasserman-Woolridge.
WHERE: 168 Bowery
WHEN: Wednesday, September 4; 8-10pm
RVSP: Invite Only


WHAT: Galore's Fashion Week Slumber Party
EXPECT: Fashion party guys Prince Chenoa and Jacob Dekat are back with another party for their newish mag and pop-up shop, Galore. Prepare to maybe hit some model and designer types with pillows while enjoying music by Chelsea Leyland and Hannah Bronfman.
WHERE: 76 Wooster St.
WHEN: Wednesday, September 4; 10pm-1am
RVSP: Invite Only

81-600x468.jpgALREADY HAPPENED

WHAT: The Wren x Leith Clark Pop-Up Shop Opening
EXPECT: To celebrate print-centric label Wren's new collaboration with Lula Magazine's Leith Clark, Tennessee Thomas and Clark are hosting an event where guests can sip champagne and put in personal orders before the rush.
WHERE: The Deep End Club, 156 1st Avenue
WHEN: Thursday, September 5; 6-8pm
RVSP: Invite Only


WHAT: The Hot 10: America's Best New Restaurants
EXPECT: For those who are as interested in food as they are in fashion, we highly recommend Bon Appétit and Warby Parker's party to celebrate the 10 best American restaurants of 2013. There's sure to be great food and great frames.
WHERE: 214 Lafayette St
WHEN: Thursday, September 5; 7-10pm
RVSP: Invite Only, RSVP Closed.

5216447f751b91377191039.jpgALREADY HAPPENED

WHAT: The 3.1 Phillip Lim for Target Stylescape
EXPECT: You'll be able to view Target's artsy homage to American style while shopping the 3.1 Phillip Lim for Target collaboration. Be sure to check out all the looks -- you'll want to come prepared.
WHERE: Spring Studio, 50 Varick St.
WHEN: Thursday, September 5; 7-10pm
RVSP: Invite Only

ToTS Final 9.5.13[1].pngALREADY HAPPENED

WHAT: The Boom Boom Room's Fifth Anniversary
EXPECT: To celebrate its fifth year -- and bazillionth party -- folks will be gathering in the Boom Boom Room to drink, be merry, and look fierce in their gold, black and "sparkle" outfits.
WHERE: The Boom Boom Room, 442 West 13th Street
WHEN: Thursday, September 5; 10pm-late
RVSP: Invite Only

zero-zero-vol-2.jpgWHAT: The Launch of the Zero Zero Project
EXPECT: Start out by attending the opening of "Zero Zero Volume 02 Them/Her", the multi-sensory exhibition by Nicola Formichetti, Kaimin and Miles Aldridge which combines visual art with architectural landsapes, music (including a DJ set by Nicola himself) and video. Then head over to Le Baron and party all night.
WHERE: 402 West 13th St.; Le Baron, 32 Mulberry St.
WHEN: Friday, September 6; 8-11pm,11pm-2am
RVSP: Invite Only

RM_SS14_After party.jpgWHAT: The Rebecca Minkoff After Party
EXPECT: Celebrate Rebecca Minkoff's new collection with drinks at the Thompson and tunes by Ranji Jacques and PAPER fave Mia Moretti. 
WHERE: Jimmy at the James Hotel, 15 Thompson St.
WHEN: Friday, September 6; 9-11:30pm
RVSP: Invite Only

BFA_628_55343.jpgWHAT: Tess Giberson After Party
EXPECT: Tess Giberson has lined up a bunch of top-notch acts to celebrate her new collection, including DJs Andrew Kuo, Caroline Polachek, Curses and Twin Shadow.
WHERE: Le Bain at The Standard, High Line
WHEN: Friday, September 6; 9pm
RVSP: Invite Only

charlotte-ronson-after-party.jpgWHAT: Charlotte Ronson After Party
EXPECT: Charlotte Ronson is throwing her after party at Marquee, where the drinks and the celebrities are sure to be flowing. The Misshapes will DJ and there will also be a performance by Ariana and the Rose.
WHERE: Marquee, 289 10th Avenue
WHEN: Saturday, September 7; 10pm-12am
RVSP: Invite Only

LG_FashionWeek_Invite.jpgWHAT: The V Magazine and Steven Gan Party with Lady Gaga
EXPECT: This one is going to be a doozy -- perennially hip V mag is hosting a party with a performance by Lady Gaga and god knows who else. We're sure drinks will be flowing and the gays will be in full regalia.
WHERE: Location unknown
WHEN: Saturday, September 7; 10pm-2am
RVSP: Invite Only

PRABAL GURUNG AFTER PARTY.jpgWHAT: The Prabal Gurung After Party
EXPECT: After watching the Prabal show, guests are invited to join in on the fun at Bar Naná, where Frankie Sharpe will be DJing and Ciara -- PAPER's current cover star -- will be performing.
WHERE: Bar Naná, 63 Gansevoort
WHEN: Saturday, September 7; 10pm-3am
RVSP: Invite Only

SPRING 2014 ALEXANDER WANG PARTY INVITE-1 (dragged).jpgWHAT: The Alexander Wang After Party
EXPECT: Alexander Wang is known for throwing absolute ragers, so you'll want to throw on your best tee and prepare for masses of Wang-clad partiers.
WHEN: Saturday, September 7; 10pm-late
RVSP: Invite Only

SEPT 7th.jpgWHAT: Hula Hoopin' Rock-a-Bop
EXPECT: Tennessee Thomas and PAPER's own Albie Alexander are resurrecting rockabilly this fashion week with a night of music, drinks and (maybe, probably not) some actual hula hooping.
WHERE: The Leadbelly, 14 Orchard St.
WHEN: Saturday, September 7; 10pm-late
RVSP: Open to the Public

5229e4e40a29f1378477284.jpgWHAT: The Public School After Party
EXPECT: New York-based It brand (and one of PAPER's personal favorites) Public School is celebrating their S/S '14 collection with a handful of great artists like Twin Shadow and DJs May Kwok and Chelsea Leyland.
WHERE: Bar Naná, 63 Gansevoort Street
WHEN: 9pm
RVSP: Invite Only

3A6D506C-3971-4F62-A30F-022DF84B42B1.pngWHAT: DKNY's 25th Anniversary
EXPECT: DKNY is celebrating its 25th birthday in style. Guest DJs will spin, drinks will be served and Jay Z protegee Rita Ora will perform.
WHERE: 23 Wall Street
WHEN: Monday, September 9; 8pm-late
RVSP: Invite Only

47420130904102108.jpgWHAT: The Twelv Magazine Fashion Week Party
EXPECT: Fashion and culture mag Twelv will be hosting another one of its fêtes at the Grey Lady. Ariana and the Rose will perform, Keiichiro will DJ and there's an open bar for the first hour and a half.
WHERE: The Grey Lady, 77 Delancey Street
WHEN: Monday, September 9, 2013; 9pm-1am
RVSP: Invite Only

BFA_6255_721595.jpgWHAT: Timo Weiland After Party
EXPECT: Timo Weiland will celebrate his new collection with a party hosted by Susanne Bartsch.
WHERE: Le Bain at The Standard, High Line 
WHEN: Tuesday, September 10; 9pm
RVSP: Invite Only


EVITE BNY Fall Campaign 09-10-13 (2).jpgWHAT: Lou Live
EXPECT: In honor of Barneys' new fall campaign -- starring Lou Doillon and shot by Inez and Vinoodh -- fashionistas will take to the Jane Hotel to watch Lou perform live. 
WHERE: The Jane Hotel, 113 Jane Street
WHEN: Tuesday, September 10; 9pm
RVSP: Invite Only

ArshamXPharrell-1.jpegWHAT: Daniel Ashram and Pharrell's Collaboration Launch
EXPECT: Miami artist Daniel Ashram and Pharrell are hosting a party at the Standard's quieter -- but no less hard-partying -- cousin, the Standard, East Village to unveil their new (and as yet unknown) collaboration.
WHERE: The Standard, East Village
WHEN: Wednesday, September 11; 6-9 pm
RVSP: Invite Only

5228b7c93f40e1378400201.jpg WHAT: Jeremy Scott After Party
EXPECT: Everyone's favorite cuckoo crazy designer is enlisting the Misshapes, DJ Mazurbate and A$AP Rocky to get you to cut a rug on the dancefloor (and maybe to make 58th street seem cool, who knows?).
WHERE: Good Units at Hudson, 356 West 58th Street
WHEN: Wednesday, September 11; 10pm-3am
RVSP: Invite Only

shhh-nyfw.pngWHAT: shhh!!! (A Fashion Week Affair)
EXPECT: Susanne Bartsch is hosting the afterparty for cuckoo crazy designers The Blonds at the McKittrick Hotel. Expect crazy lewks, no real-life shushing at all, and a whole lot of dancing.
WHERE: The McKittrick Hotel, 14 Orchard St.
WHEN: Wednesday, September 11; 11pm-late
RVSP: Invite Only

mcupload_521cf733ce30c.jpegWHAT: The Cut's End of Fashion Week Party
EXPECT: Celebrate the end of NYFW by treating your hungover and in-need-of-a-vacation self to one last party. Things you'll find there include a slew of New York magazine editors, music by Questlove and (in our dreams) maybe possibly a chance to speak to Robin Givhan. 
WHERE: Grammercy Terrace, 2 Lexington Ave
WHEN: Wednesday, September 11; 9-11pm
RVSP: Invite Only

Party photos courtesy of Billy Farrell Agency.

Snag Some of Kim Gordon's Vintage Duds!

It's one thing to channel your inner-Kim Gordon by setting up google alerts for X-Girl items on eBay or searching for the perfect floral-print babydoll dresses at your top-secret thrifting spot that's a day's drive from where you live, but it's another thing entirely to purchase some of Gordon's actual outfits. Starting tomorrow, you can do just that.

Oakland's Mercy Vintage has teamed up with the Sonic Youth (now Body/Head) frontwoman to exclusively sell over 100 pieces from her extensive stagewear and vintage collection, including several items featured in classic Sonic Youth press photographs. You can get your paws on everything from mini-skirts and '40s-era floral print dresses to ABBA-esque jumpsuits and baby tees from designers like X-Girl, Alexander Wang, Marc Jacobs, Louis Vuitton, Pucci and more. Give to ussss.

The sale kicks off tomorrow morning at 9am and will be exclusively online.

Mercy Vintage is located at 4188 Piedmont Ave., Oakland, CA

Is the RoboCop Trailer Really That Bad?


Why is everyone hating on the RoboCop trailer? It's an action movie for kids. Like, I get that it's upsetting when movies from our youths that absolutely don't need to be re-made are pooped out in time for a big Memorial Day weekend opening and that it speaks to a larger void of Hollywood creativity and a broken big-box office business model, but this trailer looks totally fine to me. As does its star, Joel Kinnaman. Anyone who put up with AMC's The Killing knows he is so, so hot. Mega-hot. And though he looks a little too polished and Aryan youth-like in his pre-RoboCopification, I'll watch anything that features Kinnaman doing it and making out with someone. Because you never saw any of that on endlessly disappointing (but well-acted) dumb-dumb fest The Killing and, yet, I watched, we all watched, through boring red herrings and terrible plots, waiting for him and Mireille Enos to JUST DO IT ALREADY. But in the end, after waiting through 2 seasons of a show with the writing of a weaker SVU re-run, all we got was a garbage scene where they almost kissed. Never again, The Killing. Never again. I'm done with you, goodbye. Anyway, check out the RoboCop trailer above. Michael Keaton's in it! Below, our favorite stills from the preview.