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The Best, Worst and Weirdest of the Week

Screen Shot 2013-09-06 at 3.55.03 PM.pngstarbocks.pngMall We're Actually Curious Enough to Want to Visit: This fake luxury shopping mall in Shenyang, China with amazing brands like Cnanel, Herwès and our favorite ubiquitous coffee shop, Starbocks. (Actually, it turns out the fake storefronts are for marketing purposes only...but still!) -- Max Kessler

New Lifestyle Blog That We Really Ought to Avoid But We Simply Cannot Look Away:
"Tips From Tan Mom," a "domestic lifestyle" blog from everyone's favorite human jack-o-lantern, Patricia Krentcil. The brownies on there actually look...good? -- Abby Schreiber

BFA_6887_803706.jpgMost Intriguing Johnny Depp Wannabe of the Week: This guy spotted at the Phillip Lim for Target party last night. -- Elizabeth Thompson [Photo by Neil Rasmus/Billy Farrell Agency]

Screen Shot 2013-09-06 at 4.35.58 PM.pngMost Sadistic Footwear of the Week: These Jeffrey Campbell shoes. The brand may be known for selling some wild shiz, but these black boots with a clear sole full of plastic babies are just too much. -- Maggie Dolan

Best Battle of the Nightmarish News Stories: Oklahoma is completely overrun with cannibal crickets BUT this Texas man found a snake coiled around the toilet he was about to pee in at Starbucks. Let's all just lock ourselves in our rooms and cry for a while. -- M.K.

Screen Shot 2013-09-06 at 3.59.41 PM.pngAds That We Feel Most "Meh" About: The new Jennifer Lawrence ads for Miss Dior. I should be giggling with excitement but it's so...straightforward. -- M.K.

The Dumbest Way to "Provoke a Dialogue" About Syria: Going on Twitter, like fashion designer Kenneth Cole did earlier this week, and making a joke that referenced the potential attack on the country. It's always good to promote discussion, but fashion and war simply don't mix. -- M.D.

Screen Shot 2013-09-06 at 4.09.12 PM.pngOur New Favorite Hasidic "Peasant With Chutzpah"-Turned-American Apparel Model: Yoel Weisshaus!. -- A.S.

Most Depressing Ways to Realize Our Future Children Are Screwed: Some BABIES have more followers then us on Twitter and Rush Limbaugh wrote a children's book -- the main character, a time traveling middle school history teacher, is named Rush Revere (seriously!). -- M.D.

411419_800wc.jpgSaddest/Most-Touching Obituary of the Week: Sarah Silverman's ode to her rescue dog, Duck "Doug" Silverman, who passed away this week. She thanked him for bringing her "such happiness and for his unwavering companionship and love." Aaaand, I'm welling up again. -- E.T.

RuPaul's "Supermodel," Soon to Be Sampled by Britney Spears


Back in 1992, queen of queens RuPaul released a little track known as "Supermodel." It became the number one hit on the US dance charts, introduced many of us to werking a lewk, and helped make Ru into the legend he is today. Now rumors are flying that Britney Spears' forthcoming new single will sample the iconic track; today, Jean Baptise -- the producer said to be working with Britney on her new album -- posted "Work, turn to the left, work, now turn to the right, work" on his Facebook wall. Then RuPaul tweeted "Werk Bitch!" at Britney and now everyone is freaking out because all of our heads will explode if Britney and RuPaul's pop diva forces combine. So in honor of this maybe, possibly, please-God-make-it-happen powerhouse collaboration, please enjoy RuPaul's original shantay moment in "Supermodel."

Happy Monday, Here's a Boys Choir Singing like Cats


Happy Monday, here's a boys choir singing like cats to an enraptured audience. [via Death and Taxes]

Screen shot 2013-09-09 at 8.20.24 AM.pngPatrick Stewart got married over the weekend and continues to be deeply perfect. [via Jezebel]

ICYMI: During an interview at the Notre Dame vs. Michigan game, Eminem acted extremely weird, getting freaked out at the prospect of being on live TV and channeling an overly nonchalant middle schooler on the subject of making good music videos. [via Uproxx]

U34L2.pngTrue. [mlkshk]

patton-movies-2.jpgpatton-movies-3.jpgpatton-movies-6.jpgpatton-movies-8.jpgpatton-movies-9.jpgPatton Oswalt has spent much of the Toronto International Film Festival pitching fake movie ideas on Twitter and some of them are really good. We'd watch a mumblecore film starring the Duplass brothers as Batman any day. [via Uproxx]

Screen-shot-2013-09-06-at-4.14.33-PM-650x349.pngAttention ladiez: now all of us non-porn stars can apply to have sex with James Deen. Apparently all you need is some selfies, some confidence, a lot of patience and a willingness to have sex with him on camera (thereby becoming a porn star of sorts). You can apply here, but the link is EXTREMELY NSFW. [via Uproxx]

tumblr_m9y1qr0qVp1r8x6rbo1_1280.jpgSomeone please pay the writer of this headline all the money. [via Afternoon Snooze Button]

U2XZ.gifUs, on the weekly. [via mlkshk]

tumblr_mstabmRXjX1rn7bzro1_1280.pngWe'd kill for Isaac Newton's volume. [via knusprig.titten.hitler]

tumblr_msr6s4kRhw1rn7bzro1_500.gifYes, it's Monday, but it's only five more days to the weekend, baby. [via knusprig.titten.hitler]

Empire of the Sun Crash a Suburban Kegger In "DNA" Clip


Everything was fine, until mom called the cops. The boys from Empire of the Sun crash a suburban kegger in this clip for "DNA" from their latest album, Ice On the Dune, and the locals don't mind. In fact they seem pretty blase about the two dudes they've encountered at an all-night convenience store. Then it's "all back to mine" for a little dip in the pool. So what ticked mom off? NO DRY ICE IN THE POOL!

TODAY: Slow and Steady Wins the Race S/S '14 Skates the Streets


At 12:15pm today keep a look out for a gang of well-dressed skateboarders. The skater cast of cult fashion brand Slow and Steady Wins the Race's s/s '14 video OUT/LAST (featuring music from The Julie Ruin) is reuniting for a one-hour live ride. Look for them heading southbound on 9th Ave from West 24th St. to West 15th St, crossing Milk Studios on West 15th St. and heading north on 10th Ave from West 15th St. to West 24th St. Catch 'em if you can!  

London's Yotam Ottolenghi Tells Us About the Best Noodle Bar in London

Yotam Ottolenghi 3_photo credit Keiko Oikawa.jpgYotam Ottolenghi (Photo by Keiko Oikawa)

Each week in our Chefs Off Duty series, we talk to some of our favorite chefs and industry folk around the country to find out their secret late-night spots where they like to grab a bite and a pint when their kitchens are finally closed. Next up: Yotam Ottolenghi, the Israeli-British chef behind London's wildly popular Ottolenghi restaurants and Nopi and the co-author of an eponymous cookbook, published in America for the first time this month.

What's your favorite under-the-radar place to grab a bite to eat in London after you're leaving your restaurant?

Shoryu Ramen noodle bar is a favorite late-night pit stop. I go to the one on Regent Street, a stone's throw from NOPI, but there is another also close in Soho. It's hardly dive-y but the dominance of Japanese diners there shows that it's still under the mainstream radar.

I discovered it about a year ago, through Ramael Scully, NOPI's head chef, who went there soon after it opened in 2012. He knows his noodle bars and hasn't found a better bowl in London yet.

What are their specialties?

The menu is short -- always a good sign. There are varieties of tonkotsu with a few soy and miso-based options. They use Hakata-style hosamen noodles, which have a great bite, served with juicy Gyoza. The kimchi is famously fiery.

8342393054_f33ba7c8c9_z.jpgShoryu Ramen

What are your favorite things to order?

I love the house ramen: Shoryu Ganso Tonkotsu in a miso broth with spinach. I order extras of the Kimchi and Nitamago -- marinated soft-boiled egg -- if I am feeling peckish. The Dracula Tonkotsu is fun to order and uses one of my favorite ingredients at the moment -- caramelized black garlic.

Any funny anecdotes from nights spent there?

This didn't happen at night -- and it's not achingly funny -- but on my last visit, my seven month old helped himself to three gyozas, and was crying his lungs out for more.

Shoryu Ramen, 9 Regent St  London SW1Y 4LR; Open Mon-Fri, 11:45am-3pm, 5pm-11:30pm; Sat, 11:45am-11:30pm; Sunday, 11:45am-4pm, 5pm-10:30pm

Recap: Penny, the Desert Ballerina

Each Monday, Eli Yudin and Carey O'Donnell, authors of the very, very funny Twitter account @NotTildaSwinton, will be recapping the Real Housewives of New Jersey for us. Below, their next installment.

real-housewives-of-new-jersey-season-5-gallery-episode-515-01.jpgEli: Well, apparently the producers had a Tarantino binge over the past week, because they've decided to start this week's episode with Joe throwing a glass at the wall and then to cut to the cryptic "10 hours ago" title. We're left to wonder, "WHAT COULD MAKE JOE GORGA THROW HIS GLASS LIKE THAT," which would be more thrilling if there weren't about a hundred reasons that Joe Gorga would throw a glass at the wall. Most of the rewind just helps to inform us exactly how everyone got drunk in those 10 hours. Either way, we then find ourselves in the Gorga bed-cell the morning of Melissa's birthday, where she's woken up by a face-ful of Trademark Gorga Flesh (now 10% bubblier). Then Teresa walks in and for a second we think this will all turn into one incestuous nightmare that will be available for purchase from Vivid in a few weeks. Thankfully my eyeballs narrowly escape the level of corrosive chemicals I would have to pour into them, and it's just a normal interaction -- by which I mean still filled with strange sexual energy. Teresa gifts Melissa silk panties with a peace sign embroidered over the vagina flap -- which I assume is correct undie terminology and is also a very weird gift to give your sister-in-law. I feel like gifts between family members shouldn't involve something that gets the other one hard, but perhaps I'm just stuck in my old-fashioned ways and don't understand this new age of free sexuality. (I blame that goddamn Wood-Stock Festival and Dubstep!!)

real-housewives-of-new-jersey-season-5-gallery-episode-515-02.jpgCarey: Earlier that morning, Gorgon Joe wakes his bride up by wishing her a happy birthday, "dipping" his rear-end on her crotch, and sucking her toes. Nice. Teresa barges in with a coffee and a birthday goodie bag for Melis; her eyes widen watching her bro and his wife canoodle, and she says something like, "Oh my gaaaaaaahd," like they're teenagers again and Teresa barges in on them while they dry hump in their darkened basement. She sits on their bed and Joe keeps on toe-suckin' and it's terrifying and awkward. Her gift to Melissa is silk, black lingerie; thank God Melissa decided to make this even more terrible. "Lingerie with a peace sign ain't gonna make it betta," Melissa says of Tre's not-so-subtle peace offering. Shut up, Melissa. SHUT UP. Outside, Kath, Creepy Rich, and Empress Rosie take a stroll through the cacti. "Yo, I'm all f*cked up from that horse shit," Ro-Ro says, reflecting on the previous day's equine therapy with garbage sage Wyatt. Kathy then brings up Rosie's unnecessary toast later that night, where she asks everyone to be nice to Kathy. "After the drum ceremony..." Kathy begins. Yes, after the drum ceremony. I'm going to begin every conversation with that this week. She feels like she doesn't need Ro prodding everyone to make them give a shit about Kathy, that she can do it on her own. The quicker Kathy accepts her role as "miscellaneous," the easier this will be for everyone else. Rich decides to peace out from the morning stroll to find the rest of da guys, and kisses both Kathy and his sister-in-law "on the lips," as he says, planting a big juicy kiss with his big juicy fish lips on Rosie. It's cool, though! Right, Rich? Cause Rosie's a big ol' lesbian! She don't caaaare when you kiss her, or grab her boobies, or grab her ass! She don't mind at all! GRAB AWAY!

real-housewives-of-new-jersey-season-5-gallery-episode-515-07.jpg Eli: After kissing everybody on dem lips, Rich vanishes into the desert, presumably to fuck a cactus. "Looks like somebody's enjoying themselves!" he whispers to a coyote. His spent flaccid dick covered in agave nectar, Rich puts his polo back on, pops the collar, and heads to the pool. Meanwhile the female squadron heads to the Body Mindfulness Center, a.k.a. the BMC, a.k.a. the BM Center, a.k.a. The Mindly Body Center for Mindfulness About Centering Your Body Center. This is a tennis court. Rosie and Melissa face off against Kathy and Teresa, all wearing clothing they apparently found in the Olivia Newton John section of Kohl's. This is all supervised by the Head Body Center Mindful Tennis Mind Instructor, Leigh Weinraub, who has the first name of a country club admissions officer and the last name of one of the Jewish families she would reject. Teresa is unsurprisingly a sore loser. The guys gather around the pool, chatting, jumping, splashing, and drinking what look like wheatgrass margaritas. Wheatgrass margaritas actually wouldn't surprise me, since they seem pretty in line with Miraval's strategy of healing all day and then, at night, supplying enough alcohol to get a state school fraternity put on social probation.

real-housewives-of-new-jersey-season-5-gallery-episode-515-16.jpgCarey: Now it's time for more TEAMBUILDINGGGGG. The crew is delivered back to Connor, the perky camp counselor type with strawbs-blonde hair and a surprising amount of chest follicles. Their last test of trust is a ropes course, with a bunch of tall wood poles and tight ropes that pairs of two will have to inch across using each other for physical support/balance. Before anyone climbs the ladder up, Teresa stares above her, her green eyes gleaming in the blanched sun. "This the hardest fuckin thing I've ever done," she yells. No one address her, except Rosie, who calls her a pussy. Connor grins. "We want you to be scared," he says. Miraval wants you afraid, you see. It wants your fear; it wants to swallow you whole, dragging you beneath the sand and into the bedrock. The first two to volunteer are Tre and brudda Joe. They walk across the rope, and everyone keeps yelling "Tre!" and "Lean, Tre!" and Teresa lets out a vulture squeal. From then on, it's just quick clips of each pair (minus Caroline who's afraid of heights) walking for like 10 feet and then falling. When Juicy Joe falls, he squirms around like a sad Cirque de Soleil clown as the harnesses lower him. That was my favorite part. Tre and Melissa are the last to go up: it's supposed to be the "climax" of the trust therapy seshes. They do their job and walk the allotted amount of tight rope, but of course Caroline has to note that "there was somethin' missing between them." Caroline, please, just stop talking. Stop coining tired, universal sayings about family and honor, and just get through this pretend-healing trip and go on back to New Jersey. No one wants these people to actually like each other. You would not have a show if these people liked each other. Just let us have it, LET US HAVE IT. After this final fake "challenge," they head back to the mausoleum for Melissa's bday dinner and draaaaaanks.

real-housewives-of-new-jersey-season-5-gallery-episode-515-25.jpgEli: The whole rope thing reminded me of when I worked as a counselor at a summer camp climbing wall, and worked at the "Leap of Faith" which was basically a half-assed bungee jump. It was 20% standing at the top of a telephone pole for a few hours and 80% convincing smaller children that they would be fine, probably. The dinner itself is a thing of tension. I would say that the dinner had more tension than the wires they were walking on, but I'm better than that. (I'm not.) As Carey touched on, Caroline's in full Terrible Sensei mode, reaching a climax when, during a perfectly nice drunken post-dinner haze, from her lush-like pile on the couch, she brings everything to a screeching halt so Joe and Teresa can confront each other. Joe does spill, explaining he does think Teresa talked to Fucking Penny about their relationship, which Teresa still denies. In fact, as the conversation progresses, I actually start to believe Teresa, which is a first, and genuinely feel bad for her, which is a second first. This may all actually be the orchestrations of Fucking Penny, who I'm sure had to change panties after getting this much airtime. We finally arrive at the point of Joe Gorga's champagne glass fastball. He retreats to the bedroom to calm down, and is brought back out when he's screamed all the fire out of his lungs. It seems he'll accept Teresa's statement that she had nothing to do with it, and it ends with a furious mob-like mutual hatred for Fucking Penny. If I were her I would start wearing Kevlar and get a food taster.

real-housewives-of-new-jersey-season-5-gallery-episode-515-27.jpgCarey: PENNY! Penny is mentioned again, and still, no one knows who she is. "Ya mean, Penny?!" Teresa asks at one point during Joe's slow-burner meltdown. "Yes," Penny said softly, waiting outside in the brush behind the room they drank champagne in. "Yes!" Penny whispered, then skipped on the tip of her toes -- a skeleton ballerina, twirling in the desert blackness. There is never a moon where Penny is. "Ha!" she yells at an armadillo, trudging past her as quickly as it can. This could be her desert, she thinks, not Miraval Carol's, or Horse f*cker Wyatt. 'This will be mine,' she thinks. Kim D the crow, digging her talons onto the top of a cactus nearby, sees Penny dancing, and hears the din from the orange glow of Miraval ahead of her. She'll let Penny have this moment, this desert dance. The Gorgon/Giudice units agree to take on Penny togetha, and "STRAIGHTEN HER OUT." What does that even mean? In the most WTF moment of this episode, Teresa says to her brother, "Swear to me, though, NO violence." NO VIOLENCE? Was that even an option? Anyway, the estranged family has united on their final night in this bizarre Marriott Courtyard in the middle of nothing. Thank God for all of us. They'll wake up at night years from now, when this show has run its course, thinking of Miraval and Carol and Wyatt and Connor, and how they didn't have last names, and that sad, terrifying drone of the desert wind at night. Kim D leaves her cactus perch and lifts off into the moonless sky, flying over the mountains and vastness until all the lights of small towns and cities extending to New Jersey go dark. It would be dawn there soon.

7 Musicians We'd Like to See Join Kim Gordon On Girls Season 3

In a recent interview with Slate magazine, Kim Gordon revealed that she's going to appear on Season 3 of Lena Dunham's ode to the terrible life decisions of twenty-somethings and ill-fitting rompers, Girls. No details yet on what her role will be -- proprietor of a small-batch ice cream company? Bitchy Bushwick gallerina? Editor of a small publishing house who picks up Hannah's e-book after it's dumped by John Cameron Mitchell? --  but, as we wait for Gordon to make her cameo, we've rounded up seven other musicians we'd like to see join her on the show.

Screen Shot 2013-09-09 at 11.09.57 AM.png
Geri Halliwell as...a SoulCycle Instructor 
Shoshana becomes addicted to SoulCycle and convinces Hannah to go to a class with her, taught by her favorite instructor, Benji, who used to teach her spinning class at NYU. But when the two girls show up to the class, they learn that Benji's out sick and will be replaced by Halliwell's character. Manic -- and slightly evil -- Halliwell is a big change from the bubbly Soulcycle regulars and decides to pick on Shosh during the class, getting in her face and yelling at her to "STAY ON THE BEAT!" Previously holding her Soulcycle skills in high esteem, Shoshonna is devastated...until Hannah, feeling awkward and unsure of what to do, gives her a hug and buys her a bong and a vibrator on her new $1000-limit credit card. 

Screen Shot 2013-09-09 at 11.07.01 AM.png
Patti Smith as...Adam's Mom 
Now that Adam and Hannah are back together, he wants to introduce her to his parents. Adam's mom is a performance artist who had brief success in the 80s before being blacklisted for outing a famous collector's WASPy wife as a lesbian. Bitter and dominating, Smith's character is obviously still holding on to her 15 minutes. Hannah, desperate for Adam's parents to like her, drinks too much and talks nonstop about herself, revealing that she once shit her pants on a school field trip to a science museum. Meanwhile, Marnie, who is still desperate for a 'real' job, is reeling after her relationship with Charlie fails for good (don't forget that Christopher Abbott won't be returning to the show). After a bad OkCupid date, Marnie crashes the dinner in hopes of meeting Smith by 'coincidentally' running into them at the restaurant. Embarassment ensues. Hannah goes home and sits in the bathtub. She pees in the tub and starts crying. Fin.

Screen Shot 2013-09-09 at 11.06.05 AM.png
Ric Ocasek as...Adam's Dad 
A carpenter specializing in mid-century Scandinavian furniture, Adam's dad is quiet and polite. During dinner with Adam and Hannah, he is nearly silent the entire evening while his wife dominates the conversation, discussing her art. Hannah realizes her and Adam's relationship mirrors that of Adam's parents, with her reflecting Ocasek. After dinner, she has a breakdown, crying and peeing in the bath tub, while Adam convinces her they are nothing like his parents.

Haim as...a Brooklyn girl gang 
While all four girls are out at a rooftop party for the 4th of July, they run into the Haim gang who are known for ruling Greenpoint -- "anything North of Fives Leaves." They ride around on super tricked out bikes in Americana hipster-wear, bullying all the new Murray Hill transplants. At the party, a drunk Marnie starts hitting on one of their boyfriends and all hell breaks loose. For the rest of the episode the Haim gang terrorizes Marnie and friends until Jessa finally settles the score by beating Danielle in a whiskey-fueled Big Buck Hunter match. 

John Mayer as...a Lame Williamsburg Playboy 
Shosh, depressed about her break-up with Ray, goes on a boy binge. While out one night with Hannah at The Woods, she downs Cosmopolitans out of pint glasses and drunkenly booty dances with randos. Hannah deserts her to go be with Adam, and Shosh has to find her own way home. Luckily she runs into Mayer smoking outside by the taco truck, and he offers to take her home on his Vespa. Mayer's character is a lead singer of a Brooklyn band called "Ethan Embryo" and has a beard and an impotency problem. Shosh is convinced she's the reason he can't get it up until Jessa reveals she's slept with him too, and promises her that Mayer is, literally, just lame. 

Tim Harrington as...a Hothead Chef 
After Adam realizes he's broke, he takes a temp job in a catering kitchen to pay rent. Harrington (who's wife is a cookbook author) is the archetype aggressive, hothead chef, but with a chip on his shoulder now that he no longer works in restaurants. Harrington and Adam butt heads immediately causing Harrington to have it out for Adam. While working a private party on the Upper East Side, Harrington goes too far and Adam loses it, causing him to strip off his chef's jacket (so he's down to his bare chest obv) and run through the house throwing food and drink in his wake. 

Stevie Nicks as...a Vintage Store Owner 
While spending an afternoon vintage shopping on the Lower East Side, Jessa falls upon Nicks' shop and immediately becomes obsessed with her AND the idea that Nicks' is her long-lost aunt. Nicks' character is suffering from early onset dementia and goes along with the idea until her real niece shows up at the store to take her to her monthly doctor's appointment. Jessa is devastated and disappears to Bali.

Eminem's "Berzerk" Video: Rhymin' and Stealin'?


Just when you thought that nobody could possibly milk the old school, hip-hop meme for one more re-up -- are you listening Mountain Dew, Reebok et. al? -- along comes two guys with enough cred to actually make it work.  And it does work.  Sure, there will be haters, but "Berzerk" deserves to be the smash hit it already is -- and that this video perfectly enhances.  What did Eminem stay or do that finally convinced Rick Rubin to do this?  What else is on Rick's "bucket list"?  Watch it over-and-over and contribute, if you must, to the forthcoming mega-list of musical and visual references (the Beastie Boys' "So What Cha Want" video and the song's general Ad-Rockiness being among the most conspicuous).  MTV might have to return to Brooklyn for next year's VMAs after all.

threeASFOUR Have a New Exhibit at The Jewish Museum in New York City

Screen Shot 2013-09-09 at 5.04.16 PM.pngAn image from MER KA BA, courtesy of threeASFOUR

In MER KA BA, a new exhibit at The Jewish Museum in New York City, Gabriel Asfour, Adi Gil and Angela Donhauser, the designers behind avant clothing label threeASFOUR, explore iconographic shapes and tile patterns found in each of the three major monotheistic religions. Christianity, Islam and Judaism "share an undying belief that the universe was built according to a specific mathematical plan," threeASFOUR says. "It is impossible to ignore the similarities prevalent in the details adorning every surface" of their religious structures.

Along those lines, the designers have created stunning 3D-printed textiles, video projections and architectural installations, all of which put a modern, technological spin on the creation of these ancient geometric patterns, in keeping with the goals of the Jewish Museum. "We don't want to give up our past but we want everything to have a contemporary bent to it," the museum's director, Claudia Gould, says. threeASFOUR and Mer Ka Ba "is a perfect metaphor for that." The exhibit, which opens September 15, follows the label's Spring/Summer '14 fashion show, which took place at The Jewish Museum yesterday morning.

Photos from their S/S '14 collection, below.


New McConaughey/Harrelson Show True Detective Looks Great


Here's the trailer for a new spooky-looking HBO series starring cosmic, country fried stoner twins Woody Harrelson and Matthew McConaughey. (You know the Kraft Services rider included tons of wheat grass, pot Luna bars and extra bongos.) It's called True Detective and stars Woody Harrelson and Matthew McConaughey as a pair of (brooding, sexy) detectives who solve crimes, are "bad men" and seem to indulge in quite a bit of debauchery. The series will be directed by Cary Fukunaga (of Jane Eyre and Sin Nombre) and written in much the same way as American Horror Story, with one season's story being completely different from the next. I'm of two very different minds about the series: on the one hand, Harrelson and McConaughy will probably give tour-de-force, Emmy-worthy performances, and this shiz looks well-executed. On the other hand, do we really need another drama centered around straight, white, male anti-heroes? Between Boardwalk Empire, Dexter, Mad Men and Breaking Bad, isn't time to give this trend a rest and make some more diverse character choices?

[via Vulture]

Whaaa?! Jimmy Kimmel Pranked Us All, Was Behind the "Worst Twerk Fail" Video


Whaaaa?!? Jimmy Kimmel was actually behind the "worst twerk fail" video and it was all a prank? Is nothing sacred or real these days? [via Jimmy Kimmel]

Mark-Paul Gosselaar got quizzed by Paul F. Tompkins about how Zach Morris would handle 2013 situations like catfishing, gluten-free pizza and CrossFit. [via Rats Off]

Screen shot 2013-09-10 at 8.51.36 AM.pngMust own immediately. [via Pee-wee Herman Facebook]

Here's two minutes of a fun and funky old-ish gentleman getting down at a block party in Sacramento. [via Hyper Vocal]

enhanced-buzz-31782-1378585114-3.jpgenhanced-buzz-2229-1378585089-4.jpgWhoa: Tyra Banks transformed herself into Cara Delevingne and Kate Moss (and, supposedly, thirteen other models) in honor of NYFW. [via Buzzfeed]

tumblr_msvfurYr1V1qzprdwo1_500.jpgHell.....yes. [via Pleated Jeans]

tumblr_mk8ampmQl11qkd8xuo1_500.giftumblr_mk8ampmQl11qkd8xuo2_500.gifThis is true. [via Julia Segal]

tumblr_mnrmg0AtjI1ql2603o1_500.jpgBecome that douche. [via Paris Hilton Sex Slave]

tumblr_mssv5jntNb1ql2603o1_500.pngWe'll take a bagel and cream cheese with a side of sass, kthanksbye. [via NikNak79]

ICYMI: Jimmy Fallon put on a Fabio wig and sang Broadway versions of rap songs with Ariana Grande. Love their vocal stylings of Cypress Hill's "Insane In the Membrane." [via Jimmy Fallon]

Screen Shot 2013-09-10 at 10.18.29 AM.pngWanna be on-trend this season? Then look no further than this hot athleticwear-inspired number that transforms your old basketball shorts into a fun 'n flirty, one-shouldered going out dress. [via Gawker]

Rita Ora Comes By PAPER HQ and Talks About...Her Action Movie Career?!


Rita Ora's been quite the busy fashion week bee lately, popping up at shows like Pyer Moss and Rochambeau, walking the runway at the DKNY show on Sunday and performing at the brand's 25th Anniversary party last night. Not long ago she stopped by our kitchen for a chat with PAPER's Abby Schreiber.  She showed off her "eight gold rings", told us about the first time she met Jay Z, and explained why her next career move may very well be playing a villain in an action movie. Watch the clip above.

Bethann Hardison, Iman and Naomi Campbell Went on TV to Talk About Racism on the Runways

video platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player

Bethann Hardison -- whom we spoke to in February about the sorry state of diversity in the fashion industry -- is causing quite a stir this New York Fashion Week by creating a new advocacy group called the Diversity Coalition. Joined by fashion icons Iman and Naomi Campbell, the group sent open letters demanding more diversity to the governing bodies of fashion in New York, Paris, London and Milan. The letters called out specific brands like Armani, Calvin Klein and Donna Karan that tend to cast an inordinately small amount of models of color for their runway shows (or to not cast them at all). This morning, the three women went on Good Morning America to talk about how troubling the lack of runway diversity is: Campbell talked about the statistics (which, if you'll recall, are overall pretty terrible, with one or no black models being cast in many shows), Hardison called out designers for using "artistic vision" and "aesthetics" as excuses, and Iman made a very good point (one which designers and casting agents should keep in mind) about differentiating between being racist and perpetuating racism: "this is not the business of shaming. And as we go back again to clarify it, nobody is calling any of these designers racist. The act [of casting very few models of color] itself is racism." We're pumped that the campaign is gaining steam outside of the fashion press -- the best way to start tackling these issues is with an open dialogue and some attempt at accountability. Watch above and prepare to start slow-clapping.

[via Fashionista]

All of Our NYFW S/S '14 Fashion Week Coverage In One Place!


Inez & Vinoodh Team Up With Swedish Fragrance House Byredo

byredo_inez&vinoodh.jpgAbout three years ago, Ben Gorham, the founder of Stockholm-based fragrance house Byredo, teamed up with legendary fashion photographers Inez van Lamsweerde and Vinoodh Matadin on a scent inspired by the couple's beautifully unsettling photograph of a teenage girl, "Kirsten 1996." Originally produced as a holiday gift for close friends, it wasn't long before word spread and the threesome found themselves bombarded with requests to make the scent commercially.

Lucky for us, they listened. The result is "1996," a blend of juniper berries, black pepper, patchouli, black amber and vanilla. It's a combination of light and dark notes meant to evoke the original photo that is, as Gorham notes, "something very beautiful and angelic" but also, with the girl's glossy lips and "eyes rolled back in an euphoric state," an image filled with "disturbance and darkness." He adds, "I want the wearer to understand that things can be both beautiful and ugly at the same time." The scent is available at Barneys and online.

Autumn Art Shows Worth Seeing in New York City

The Fall gallery season is already in full swing here in New York and -- if you can squeeze in some non-fashion events -- there are lots of great things to see. Our roundup of the best shows to see over the next few weeks in NYC, below.

ArshamXPharrell-1.jpegOn September 11th, Daniel Arsham and Pharrell Williams will unveil a collaboration at The Standard, East Village. Not sure what exactly they have collab-ed on -- or why -- but it looks sort of like a de-constructed keyboard. We'll see tomorrow.

Screen Shot 2013-09-10 at 3.09.28 PM.pngAlso on the 11th, from 3-7pm, there's a release party for a poster called "8lb. Pooch" over at the SuperPier on the Hudson River near 15th Street. Look for it in the pop-up branch of Brooklyn's The Newsstand. There's also several other pop-ups in the space including Opening Ceremony, DKNY and a number of food vendors. SuperPier is only open until the 12th, when the whole space will be re-vamped into a giant multipurpose venue that will include a spa by Andre Balazs.

Screen Shot 2013-09-10 at 3.13.41 PM.pngNew York-based artist David Ellis has a show of paintings and mixed-media works called Hudson River Alley opening on Thursday, September 12 from 6-8pm at the Joshua Liner Gallery (540 West 28th Street). It's up until October 19.

Screen Shot 2013-09-10 at 3.17.48 PM.pngOn September 17th, the first US branch of Gallerie Perrotin will open at 909 Madison Avenue with a show by the Italian artist Paola Pivi. The acclaimed contemporary art gallery started in Paris in the late '80s and also recently opened a branch in Hong Kong. The Pivi show will be up until October 26 and will be followed on November 2 by an exhibit of new works by New York artist KAWS.

10ARTS4-blog480.jpgAnother reworked space on 239 10th Avenue at 24th Street (it was once a gas station) will host "temporary public art" until it's torn down and becomes a new residential building. Paul Kasmin and Michael Shvo put together the first show called Sheep Station, with works by the late Francois-Xavier Lalanne. It opens on September 16 and runs until October 20. Look for the flock of sheep sculptures made of stone.

P-20120910-00211_News-1.jpgRed Bull is hosting "The Canvas Cooler Project" this fall with 20 New York-based artists who will transform Red Bull coolers into customized works of art. Before the pieces go on display in each venue, they will be on view Thursday, September 19, at 9pm, at The 1896 (215 Ingraham Street, Brooklyn). The artists include Cope2, Hanksy, Jerkface, Col Wallnuts, JMR and more.

There are also several shows that opened last week, but are worth checking out:

Leila Pazooki_This is Not Green_2009_hires-thumb-700x361-117032.jpgDon't miss the current group show at Leila Heller Gallery (568 West 25th Street) called Calligraffiti curated by Heller and Jeffrey Deitch.

The_Bar_on_2nd_Ave_copy.jpgNew York-based artist Tom Sanford has a show at Kravets/Wehby on 521 West 21st Street. It includes this amazing portrait of PAPER's Carlo McCormick called The Bar on 2nd Ave (2013), which is reason enough to go. It's on view until October 12.

pizza-hero-gallery.jpgMarlborough Gallery just opened a new space at 331 Broome Street on the Lower East Side and they've launched with a cool -- and yummy? -- exhibit called Pizza Time! centered around everyone's favorite food. The group show, up until October 6, includes works by Catherine Ahearn, John Baldessari, Nate Lowman, Spencer Sweeney and Jonah Freeman and Justin Lowe.

Screen Shot 2013-09-10 at 3.35.30 PM.pngJonathan LeVine Gallery (at 529 West 20th Street) has a great display of internet meme-ready new works by Blek Le Rat called Ignorance Is Bliss that will be up until October 5.

5_Andrew_Schoultz_NewWork_2013_web2.jpgNew works by Andrew Schoultz are now on view at Morgan Lehman at 535 West 22nd Street. Check it out before October 12.

DigEx_InstallView2_web.gifUntil October 19, the Suzanne Geiss Company (76 Grand Street) features an exhibition of works by Ben Wolf Noam, Greg Parma Smith and Korakrit Arunanondchai called Digital Expressionism.

Monogem's New Music Video: Electropop and Breakin'


A project created by Los Angeles-based singer and songwriter Jen Hirsh, Monogem makes disco and funk-tinged synth pop that will make you want to groove, gurl. That's why we're excited to premiere the '80s-tastic video of their first single, "The Glow." Somehow re-edited to synch to one of the break-dancing montages from the 1984 cinematic gem Breakin' -- in which Turbo, Ozone and Kelly dance to Chaka Khan's "Aint Nobody," might we remind you -- the video will renew your love for arm-warmers, high-waisted athletic pants, leotards and fierce-ass moves. Watch above and if you're in L.A., also make sure to catch Monogem's performance tomorrow at The Standard Hollywood.

Monogem performs Thursday, September 12th at The Standard, Hollywood & Audio Absinthe, 7:30pm

Arcade Fire Get Really Creepy in the New Video for "Reflektor"


After what feels like a long wait, Arcade Fire are back with new single "Reflektor" and not one, but two accompanying music videos. Both are directed by Anton Corbijn and are, uh, creepy. We went with the embeddable one -- you can check out the other, which is interactive and pretty crazy, here. This version of "Reflektor" is a black-and-white affair that sort of feels like a mishmash of horror movies: you've got a group of menacing people in creepy masks, a couple driving through the dark woods, a dash of Clockwork Orange fashion and some mirrored-disco-ball Freddy Krueger realness. As the song chugs along (with a heavy electro-disco influence from LCD Soundsystem's James Murphy, who produced the track) we see the characters slowly begin to reflect on themselves while literally mirroring one another's movements and staring at dolls (probably meant to symbolize a reflection of youth). Watch it above, but don't watch it alone at night.

ICYMI: This Guy Waking Up and Realizing His Wife Is Hot Is Awesome


ICYMI: Here's an amazing video of a man named Jason Mortensen coming to after having surgery and realizing that he's married to a beautiful woman. Heart explosion. [Gawker]

Bill De Blasio, who won last night's Democratic primary, has an awesome family. That is all. [Via Buzzfeed]

Anthony Weiner, who ate shit in the election last night, was chased through a McDonald's by the equally pathetic Sydney Leathers (who has brand new implants), after she showed up to Weiner's "victory party." He fled into an alley. [Gawker]

tumblr_msqs5yT1ZH1shj7flo1_1280-650x930.jpg"Bey with a Pearl Earring" by Jay-zness Vermeer. [The Carter Family Portrait Gallery via Uproxx]

funniescreppy.pngScray! [LaughterKey]

The 'before' parts of infomercials set to the Smiths' "Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want" is poignant, powerful. [Mlkshk]

tumblr_msx4b9PKvm1sshjq5o1_500.pngSo thoughtful. [RatsOff]

U495.jpgFlip a photo of bats hanging upside down and you get Butch-Queen Bats Up in Pumps realness! [MlkShk]

U4N2.jpgColonel Sanders, Alice Cooper, head explosion. [Mlkshk]