New favorite Twitter alert: @SATC3quel, which imagines what Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha would be doing and who they'd be screwing (sorry, had to) in our modern and age well into the future. It is the best. [via Queerty]Here's an, um, interesting parody of the internet's favorite joke song of the moment, "The Fox," done by a bunch of Abercrombie models in animal costumes. We're cool with shirtless hot guys saying "the cow goes moo" and whatnot, but Abercrombie should probably spend less time making model videos and more time apologizing for hating heavy people and trying to make clothes teenagers actually want to buy. [via Jezebel]
When we first saw this we really thought it was a horrible trick, but no. This guy -- a San Francisco resident named Isaiah Webb -- can and does choose to eat ramen out of his own beard. There aren't enough ughs and eye-rolls in the world to un-see this shit. [via Death and Taxes]
Oh god, Bill Clinton (or whoever runs Bill Clinton's Twitter), was a "2 Girls, 1 Cup" reference really necessary? [via Gawker]Here's a hilarious and accurate rendition of what Homeland: The Musical would look like. In addition to hard-hitting lyrics like "I've got the guy right here/his name's Abu Nazir/and if the bomb goes off/we're all comandeered," it also provides helpful review soundbites that are very, very accurate. [via Death and Taxes]
Swoon. [via Afternoon Snooze Button]For those of you who like scary movies with really stupid titles that speak to your real world experiences, here's the trailer for Big Ass Spider! Oh, how we know the woes of the Big Ass Spider. [via Deadline]
Agreed, Elaine. [via mlkshk]