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Our Favorite Ladies Share Their Twentysomething Mistakes

Whether you interrupted the Golden Globes on Sunday night to rabidly devour the season premiere of Girls or you've never heard of Lena Dunham and couldn't care less about a show centered on four twentysomething Brooklyn women, we'll venture to guess that most people would empathize with one of the show's major themes: being in your twenties can sometimes be as overrated as $14 artisanal carrots. You know you should be having "fun," dating lots of inappropriate people, trying out a variety of jobs/cities/romantic partners but a lot of the time, all that unmoored-ness just sucks. And, with little to compare it to, even the smallest mistake you make can feel like you've blown your one chance for The Best Thing In Life Ever. Thankfully -- in most cases -- that's not true. We had the chance to talk to some of the women we most admire in media, literature, art, fashion, food and comedy and hear about what they consider their biggest -- or most memorable -- twentysomething mistake. And, as you'll see, each of these ladies not only got past her youthful faux pas but also went on to kick some major ass in whatever career path she chose. Take note. 

maryhkchoi_twentysomethingmistakes.jpgMary H.K. Choi, Senior Editor at MTV Style
"I really wish I had written more when I was younger. I was such a fucking pill in my early twenties -- super judgey and uptight -- and it was a direct result from being scared and insecure about having moved to New York with no money and zero contacts. I learned everything I could about publishing and ended up being a pretty solid line editor at the small graffiti magazine where I worked but I was too clenched and crazy to just write and put things out there. It's ridiculous in hindsight because, ultimately, who gives a shit? But if I'd been more intrepid, I think I would've figured out what I wanted to do way sooner." [Photo by Adriel Reboh/PatrickMcMullan.com]

jennyjohnson_twentysomethingstory.jpgJenny Johnson, Writer/Master Tweeter
"Right after I graduated from college I moved to Austin, Texas. Austin is an amazing city to live in, especially for a 21-year-old who is bound by nothing. It only makes sense that on my first night there I would go out and celebrate my arrival in the ATX with a group of friends. That night I made the not-so-wise decision to drink enough alcohol to kill a small horse. The details of my evening are a bit fuzzy but there were enough witnesses to inform me that during the duration of my night on the town, I jumped onstage and rapped with the Sugar Hill Gang, punched a guy in the face for grabbing my ass and doing that tongue-between-the-fingers thing at me, stole a loaf of bread and cold medicine from a house party, rolled my friend up in an area rug, puked in a Jack-In-The-Box parking lot, called 911 because I lost my keys, broke a window to get into my apartment and passed out in my bathtub with an uneaten hamburger on my chest. Drink wisely, kids."

cynthiarowley_twentysomethingmistakes.jpgCynthia Rowley, Fashion Designer
"In my early twenties, I just moved to New York City, started making clothes, and was so broke. I did almost anything to pay the rent. (Picture whatever mistake you want here.)"

gabriellehamilton_twentysomethingmistakes.jpgGabrielle Hamilton, Chef/Owner of Prune and author of Blood, Bones & Butter
"In my twenties, I mistook meanness for intellectualism, and had this idea that if I had a razor-sharp wit, I would be perceived as smart -- like Dorothy Parker or H.L. Mencken smart. I could have been so much kinder to so many people."

phaedra_twentysomethingstory.jpgPhaedra Parks, Attorney and star of Real Housewives of Atlanta
"I should have traveled abroad more and stayed longer and worried less about my career."

lesleyarfin_twentysomethingmistakes.jpgLesley Arfin, Girls writer
"The biggest mistake I made in my twenties was that I cared too much about what other people thought of me."

kim_twentysomethingmistakes.pngKim Hastreiter, PAPER Co-founder, Publisher and Editor-in-Chief
"I signed a lease on a horrible apartment on Carmine Street because I met a low-level mobster who said he could get me a rent-controlled apartment if I paid him 750 dollars in cash. I was desperate to find an apartment so I signed the lease and when I went back to look at it (after having paid three months' rent and security on it), I saw there was no lock on the front door, no kitchen and bullet holes in the apartment window and through the door. I called my father crying that "I made a big mistake" and so my poor dad had to come to the city, meet the mafioso landlord and appeal to him as "a father of a young innocent who made a mistake" to get me out of the lease. I never got the finder's fee back but the landlord was a father himself so he returned the three months' rent." [Photo by Dan Monick]

erinfetherstontwentysomething.jpgErin Fetherston, Fashion Designer
"The biggest mistake I made in my twenties was being too hopeful that dead-end roads would magically lead somewhere. It took me a while to realize that when you hit a dead end, all you can do is turn around and forge a new path." [Photo by Billy Farrell/BFANYC.com]

jing_twentysomething mistakes.jpgJing Liu, Architect and co-founder of SO-IL
"My biggest mistake was not putting 100% in everything I did while in my twenties. I procrastinated, sneered, contemplated and waited a little bit too long sometimes. Nothing is a waste of time in your twenties. Just do it."

emmastraub_twentysomethingmistakes.jpgEmma Straub, Writer
"Though I successfully dodged the Great Trucker Hat Disaster of the early 2000s, I did wear pre-distressed blue jeans and enormous basketball sneakers, both of which would have been horribly expensive had I not still been using my parents' credit card."

june_ambrose_twentysomethingmistakes.jpgJune Ambrose, Celebrity Stylist
"In my twenties I was jet-setting and building my company [but] I never imagined that I would have what I have now. Now I always think big and don't underestimate where I will be in 10 years."

lynnyaeger_twentysomethingmistakes.jpgLynn Yaeger, Fashion Writer/Editor
"I wish that when I was in my twenties I wasn't always so worried about how I looked, how I measured up compared to other women my age, whether my clothes were good enough, etc. As soon as I got the courage to really go my own way -- and it did take a while -- the happier I became. Oh, and I wish I had started writing professionally a whole lot earlier than I did."

janepratttwentysomething.jpgJane Pratt, Founding Editor of Sassy, Jane and xojane.com
"When I was a couple of years out of college and just getting ready to start Sassy Magazine, I got invited by Maybelline, a potential advertiser, to a big beauty luncheon at Tavern on the Green. They also invited my 'beauty editor.' Since I didn't have one, I just brought one of my college housemates. When we got there, I moved the placecard for the Beauty Director of Mademoiselle to another table so that my friend could sit with me. My friend ended up sitting next to the President of Maybelline and the Mademoiselle editor was pissed. I didn't know you couldn't just do that." [Photo by Olivia Hall]

kenyarobinson_mistakes.jpgKenya (Robinson), Artist
"My twenties were wrought with an adherence to the calculable, the predictable, the legible, the linear. This was certainly my biggest mistake. However unavoidable. I mean, how do you in fact gain wisdom, without taking your lumps. Especially since this whole personal evolution thing is more a product of actual experience than anything else, symbiotically connected to our ability to eventually break it all the way down, like the space continuum conundrums that inhabit the Star Trek Universe, or those Back to the Future movies. And so, to break it all the way down, my twenty-ish ego was a taskmaster. Hell-bent on doing the right thing. Going to law school, marrying some knucklehead that I had no business tying myself to, or relying on an established template of 'next'. Hallelujah, the Bored works in mysterious ways! In my twenties, I had no idea that my future could reside beyond my imagination (Willy Wonka?). As it was, The Future was a thing to be strategically mapped and planned for like a retirement package. Not to mention, fretted over. Every obstacle I encountered during that period was located on a horizontal track, a hurdle to be cleared, so that I could collect my Super Mario coin. In my thirties, however,  it's been made clear that my perspective was all kinds of off; those obstacles were not impediments to forward movement, but rungs on a vertical ladder. Go figure. The monarchy of my life's plan made resistant to typical means of classification.  A princess-empress-queen hybrid of simultaneous self awareness and acquiescence to the unpredictable rules and fuels my thirties life." [Photo by Ryan McCune/PatrickMcMullan.com]

christinatosi_twentysomething_mistakes.jpgChristina Tosi, Momufuku Milk Bar Chef/Owner
"In my twenties I wish I were a little less cocky. That's not to say I was ever egomaniacal or anything close to it, but I still hadn't shaken the teenage 'the world is my oyster and I know everything I need to know (you can't teach me a thing)' mentality. I was passionate and independent almost to a fault, certainly to a regret. I'd get into the hot-head-redhead zone when I felt someone wasn't working hard enough or good enough. I'd refuse to allow room for error or ignorance. I was in SUCH a rush to get grown, get further, get smarter, get more done, that I ended up most times looking like a lunatic raising my voice when I could have made my point more gracefully otherwise or choosing battles I could have let simmer out like a wiser woman in her thirties. God bless my twenties, they're why I am who I am today, but damn, I could have kept my cool a little more..."

tignotaro_twentysomethingmistakes.jpgTig Notaro, Comedian
"Honestly, I can't think of a single regret that I have. Every horrible decision that I possibly should regret in life lead me to where I am today. It's difficult to feel anything but pretty great."

Jennifer Egan Talks Awful Temp Jobs, Writing from the Subconscious and Her Pulitzer Prize

Eight Items or Less: Leo Villareal's BUCKYBALL Stays in Madison Square Park

1. A new art fair is coming to New York's Lower East Side from May 10 to 13, 2013. The "cutlog" fair will happen during the same week as the second edition of Frieze NY, and will be held in the Clemente Soto Velez Center (107 Suffolk Street). Over 40 galleries are expected to participate.

2. A Dutch company created this clear "Goedzak" bag for stuff that you don't want but is still in too good a condition to be trash. "Goedzak" means "do-gooder" in Holland. (Dezeen)

3. A man stole $376,000 worth of copy machine toner from the office supplies at his job. (NYT; photo by Brett Neilson on Flickr)

Screen Shot 2013-01-16 at 1.52.33 PM.jpg
4. Donald Judd's former home and studio at 101 Spring Street in SoHo is re-opening in June after a three-year restoration.

5. If you missed Leo Villareal's BUCKYBALL sculpture in Madison Square Park, you've still got a few more weeks to check it out. It will now be on view through February 15. As we suggested before, go after it gets dark out and after 4:20. (Photo by James Ewing/Madison Square Park Conservancy)

6. "Tweet My Fridge." Update your kitchen with some of the weird new appliances seen at the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas. (The Verge)

AndrewAndrew Insta-Review Broadway, Off-Broadway, and Off-Off

This was a BIG week for theatre both On- and Off-Broadway! There are many Off-Off-Broadway festivals (the main one being Under The Radar at The Public Theater) happening with shows from all over the globe.


Picnic, presented by the Roundabout Theatre Company at The American Airlines Theatre, is a revival of a once-scandalous forbidden romance story. But in this day and age does a shirtless drifter with ample pecs still make the ladies swoon or does today's audience demand a deeper cut of beefcake? Find out in our full review!


The producers of C'est du Chinois claim that its actors will teach you basic comprehension of their language -- Mandarin Chinese, in which the entire play is performed. In a way this is the universal claim of any avant-garde theatre: "We will perform in a way foreign to you but you will understand it because our art is strong." Did we comprehend it or leave the theatre scratching our heads? Find out in our full review!

Blood Play is a thriller, a genre most theatre shies away from, and rightly so. The action unfolds in a recently renovated basement rec-room in a Jewish suburb of Chicago. Hoping to ingratiate themselves into the cliquey neighborhood, the new couple on the block hosts an impromptu cocktail party while their single child camps out in the backyard, an outcast. The adults seem to be suffering from collective PTSD, willing themselves into a state of eternal adolescence fueled by ever more absurd cocktails and party games while their son deals with the the brutal realities of being the new kid. Is this a neighborhood we should buy a place in or would we rather just visit for a polite dinner party? Find out in our full review!


Inflatable Frankenstein, now playing at The Kitchen as part of PS122's COIL festival, is a valiant attempt by Radiohole, stalwarts of the Brooklyn scene, to stitch together a Frankenstein monster of their very own. Instead of body parts, their raw materials are the various incarnations of this modern monster myth. Is Inflatable Frankenstein "Alive!" or dead on arrival? Find out in our full review!

Watch Justin Vivian Bond Deliver The News, Drunk


Forget Kathy Lee and Hoda. Our new favorite, mildly inebriated news source is the multitalented Justin Vivan Bond's new web endeavorer, The Drunk News. The series features Bond informing the masses with some hard-hitting journalism, delivered in an, um, altered state. Bond weighs in on a range of current events, including everything from the political suspense of the "Fiscal Clip" to Jodie Foster's much-discussed Golden Globes coming out-there speech ("Everybody's doing think tanks! Think pieces!"), via a hilarious stream of consciousness. The whole thing is like a one-sided conversation with your drunk aunt who only half listens to NPR. Is it just us, or should Bond team up with Amanda Lepore's meteorologist talents to create the best news show of all time? We'd watch that over Be Depressed, er, Meet the Press, any day.

Morning Funnies: Scott Disick's Days As a Teenage Romance Novel Model

tumblr_mgpvhbrrvI1rn7bzro1_1280.jpgFeaturing John W. Knoxville and Stephen O. [via Knusprig Titten Hitler]

This is awesome: Samuel L. Jackson appeared on a British radio show and read the lyrics to Taylor Swift's song "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together" after a listener called in, saying she wanted to send a message to her scummy boyfriend. [via ONTD]

tumblr_mgmzjbKwRP1qg39ewo1_500.gifBoing boing. [via Coin Farts]

enhanced-buzz-19271-1358372983-7.jpgBehold, Scott Disick during his teen romance novel modeling days. Before he was impregnating Kourtney Kardashian, he was "healing horses, healing hearts." [via Buzzfeed]

Here's Jennifer Lawrence and Jason Sudeikis in a promo for Lawrence's upcoming SNL hosting duties. [via Uproxx]

Screen shot 2013-01-16 at 6.59.19 PM.pngWEIRDALenhanced-buzz-18913-1358358814-2.jpgDon't make us choose! [via Buzzfeed]

"I now pronounce you wife and wife. You may kiss the bride." [via Bunny Food]

tumblr_mgdnn8MfBm1r4y0tco1_500.gifTTYL betch. [via Paris Hilton Sex Slave]

Watch Fred Armisen have a drumoff with Questlove on Jimmy Fallon. [via Jimmy Fallon]

Screen shot 2013-01-17 at 8.38.02 AM.pngHere is Don Cheadle strutting his stuff at a House of Lies table read after the Golden Globes. Don, can we hang sometime? We'll make nachos. [via The Clearly Dope]

Style Scraps: Karlie Kloss Will Probably Go to Harvard + And Bradley Cooper Thinks He Got a Perm

constance-jabolnski-sued.jpgModel Constance Jablonski is being sued by Marylin Modeling Agency for $3.3 million for decamping to DNA Model Management. Yikes, that's a lot of money. [via The Cut]  

versace-mens-wax.jpgVersace has an interesting (sexy?) take on boxer briefs. More importantly, that male model definitely got waxed for this. [via The Cut]  

bradley-cooper-perm.jpgBradley Cooper thinks he hot a perm for a screen test he had yesterday, saying "I got a perm today! Like rollers! Oh, yeah bro, like rollers in the hair!" So in reality, he just had rollers put in his hair. Still, kudos for talking about it! [via The Cut]   

raf-mens-2013-fw.jpgI'm mildly obsessed --and slightly confused by the logistics of -- these blazers with bands that Raf Simons showed at his F/W 2013 show. The show also features a Puss in Boots jacquard, by the way. [via Style.com]  

Speaking of Raf: behold, the first images of the Raf Simons x Adidas collaboration. [via Selectism]  

KENZO_SS13_DOUBLE_B.jpegStill lovin' these ads by Kenzo -- the brand renewed its collaboration with Jean-Paul Goude for their SS '13 campaign. [via Press Release]  

Screen shot 2013-01-17 at 12.08.33 PM.pngIn light of French President Françoise Hollande's promised same-sex marriage bill and the protests that have erupted in opposition to it, French Elle made a "Marriage for All!" issue, out tomorrow. [via The Cut]  

Alissia Melka-Teichroew.jpgLocal New York artist Alissia Melka-Teichroew just released this collection of 3D engraved jewelry. We like, we like. [via Press Release]  


Karlie Kloss wants to go to Harvard! She also wants to major in business or medicine, telling The Daily: "I have always had an interest in medicine; my father is an emergency room doctor. Now that I am getting more and more involved in these entrepreneurial projects I think business is something that would also be fascinating. To have a better understanding of economics and business and the way to run a successful company." We love a woman with a plan! [via Fashionista]  

Rudimental's New Video Deserves an Academy Award


East London's Rudimental scored a #1 single -- and Brit Award nomination -- for last year's "Feel the Love," and their debut album is coming out in February.  Though the band's not in it, this video for "Not Giving In" is one of the very few that manages to tell a story while perfectly capturing the feeling and emotion of a song, and the director, Josh Cole, deserves the music-video equivalent of an Academy Award. The clip was shot in Manila and it's based on a true story about a world-champion breakdancer named Mouse -- he appears in the clip as the guy giving lessons to the young b-boy.  Rudimental will be playing at Ultra in Miami in March. (Warning: This first minute of this video features a domestic abuse scene, so skip over that part if it's not something you wish to see.)

One more bit of info:  The four guys in Rudimental have used various featured vocalists including Angel Haze, John Newman and Alex Clare -- who sings on this track.  Alex was also nominated for a Brit Award this year for his hit single, "Too Close," and you can read PAPER's interview with him HERE.

The Full Trailer For Spring Breakers, Now With More Cornrows


If you've been longing for a cuckoo-bananas movie trailer to get you through your Thursday, boy have we got something for you: The trailer for Spring Breakers -- the movie made famous by James Franco's cornrows -- is out, and, well, it looks nuts. Former Disney girls Vanessa Hudgens and Selena Gomez shedding their Disnified images and wearing bikinis to a court appearance? Check. James Franco channeling aggressively, progressively flamboyant, yet tastefully disrespectful rapper Riff Raff? Check. That wacky Skillrex music that only kids these days undestand? Check. Watch it above.

Dawn Richard, Nick Zedd, Egyptian Lover and More This Weekend in NYC

Thursday, January 17
ART: Panayiotis Terzis at Printed Matter
Tonight's launch celebrates two new works: a window installation of sculptures based on Internet ads and an artist's book inspired by ancient religious totems.
Printed Matter, 195 Tenth Avenue. Reception tonight 6-8 p.m. Installation will be on view through January 28.

PARTY: Shreddie Mercury at the DL
Womp-happy young producer Shreddie Mercury headlines this free weekly party.
DL, 95 Delancey. 10 p.m. Free before midnight with RSVP here. (21+)

MUSIC: Dawn Richard at S.O.B.'s
An alumna of Diddy's R&B experiments Danity Kane and Dirty Money, Dawn Richard this week released the ambitious solo album GoldenHeart, full of crystalline synths, military metaphors, EDM peaks and musical quotations from both Phil Collins and Peter Gabriel.
S.O.B.'s, 204 Varick Street. 8:30 p.m., $25.

Friday, January 18
FILM: Urgh! A Music War at Nitehawk Cinema
How broad was the phrase "new wave" in 1982? Some of the acts in this film -- the Go-Gos, Joan Jett, Devo, Gary Numan, the Police -- would score top 40 hits by decade's end; some -- the Dead Kennedys, X, Pere Ubu, the Cramps -- would become enshrined in punk mythology; one, Invisible Sex, would leave no other trace of existence.
Nitehawk Cinema, 136 Metropolitan Avenue, Brooklyn. 12:05 a.m. 96 minutes, 35 mm. $11; Tickets here.

FILM: Triple Fisher: Lethal Lolitas of Long Island at Videology
Drew Barrymore, Alyssa Milano and Noelle Parker all star as "Long Island Lolita" Amy Fisher in a single Frankenstein of a film edited from three different made-for-television productions by innovative director Dale Kapelovitz, who will provide a Skype-d Q & A following the film.
Videology, 308 Bedford Avenue, Brooklyn. 8 p.m., $8. Tickets here.

PARTY: Interracial 17 at Bedlam
The dynamic duo at GAYLETTER does it again with the barely-legal installment of their Interracial party, co-hosted by musician, performer and self-proclaimed "King of Banjee Realness" Ab Soto. Come mix and dance with the crowd, and maybe contribute to GAYLETTER's ongoing fundraiser to revamp and expand their site.
Bedlam, 40 Avenue C. 10 p.m. Free

Saturday, January 19
ART: Frozen Lakes at Artists Space
Just over 25 years ago, Artists Space's "Pictures" exhibit gave its name to a group (including Cindy Sherman, Laurie Simmons, and Richard Prince) who would be collected in histories of photography as the "Pictures Generation"; artists who used the photograph as a "signifying structure of its own accord," in the words of curator Douglas Crimp. The eight artists and two collectives in this 2013 update were all selected for their work's relevance to the circulation of images. (Pictured: Metahaven, "Wikileaks," 2011. Photo by Meinke Klein.)
Artists Space, 38 Greene Street, 3rd Floor, (212) 226-3970. Open Wednesday through Sunday, 12-6 p.m. Opening reception tonight 6-8 p.m.

FILM: "Cinema of Transgression" at Glasshouse
The final night of this five-day festival, curated by New York avant-garde/underground filmmaker Nick Zedd, includes five episodes of Zedd & Jen Miller's public-access show "The Adventures of Electra Elf and Fluffer" and four stand-alone shorts.
Glasshouse, 246 Union Avenue, Brooklyn. $10 suggested donation. Full schedule here.

PARTY: Cielo 10th Anniversary
NYC's award-winning nightclub is celebrating its 10th Anniversary this year and they've scheduled 10 special events during January; tonight's features Tania Vulcano and Willie Graff. Stop in and say "hello" to Nic and the whole crew.
Cielo, 18 Little West 12th Street, (212) 645-5700. 10 p.m., $20. Tickets here. (21+)

Sunday, January 20
MUSIC: Egyptian Lover at PS 1
Before Dr. Dre got his degree, the West Coast's leading hip-hop producer was Greg Broussard, a.k.a. Egyptian Lover, who made Afrika Bambaataa-style electrojams with titles like "Egypt, Egypt" and "My House (On the Nile)." He'll be performing this afternoon after a DJ set by goth hip-hop group Salem as part of PS 1's Winter Open House.
MoMA PS 1, 22-25 Jackson Avenue, Queens, (718) 784-2084. Performance at 4 p.m. $10 (suggested).

READING: The Making of Americans at 155 Freeman
Gertrude Stein's 925-page novel, first published in 1925, repeats variations of the same sentences for page after page, resisting most solo readers, but providing an incantatory quality when read aloud, as it will be over an estimated 52 hours this weekend by an estimated 140 artists and writers brought together by the online magazine Triple Canopy. Stop by today to cheer them past the finish line; borscht will be provided.
155 Freeman Street, Brooklyn. Starts Friday night at 7 p.m. Full line-up here. Free.

PARTY: Oh! You Pretty Things at (le) poisson rouge
"Oh! You Pretty Things" celebrates the birthdays of all you Capricorn things -- including David Bowie and Elvis Presley -- with a big blowout. There will be tons of hosts (Nita Aviance, King Vulcanus, etc.); tons of special guests (Alison Clancy, Birdy Black, etc.); tons of DJs (Twig the Wonderkid, DJ Ceremony, etc.) plus performances by Screamin' Rebel Angels, Michael T and the Vanities, and Benjamin Ickles and This Ambitious Orchestra) and tons and tons of fun for all.
(le) poisson rouge, 158 Bleecker Street, (212) 505-3474. 10 p.m. 21+. $15 advance, $20 day of. Tickets here.

Eight Items or Less: Wear, Don't Eat, Crustaceans


1. The new "experimental and minimal" album by Phoenix is called "Bankrupt!" and it's coming out in April.

2. Shreddie Mercury, The Golden Pony and Chemicals of Creation are at DL (95 Delancey Street) tonight, January 17. It's FREE before midnight with an RSVP here.


3. "Winter," an exhibitition of new works by Tyler Dobson opens on January 23, 6 to 8 p.m., at 47 Canal Street Gallery (47 Canal Street, second floor) and runs until February 24. He's a Pratt grad living and working in Brooklyn.

4. Still waiting.

Screen Shot 2013-01-17 at 12.56.05 PM.jpg

Screen Shot 2013-01-17 at 12.51.03 PM.jpg
6. Crustacean chic: Giant Lobster Necklace. (Hat tip to Trend Hunter)

Behold: Gossip Girl Acapulco

ahjiu.jpgWe're all feeling the loss of Gossip Girl, the show which filled our hearts with headband-envy and an unwavering conviction that identities will always be mistaken at masquerade balls. Which is why we were slightly jealous when we found out that within weeks of the American version's finale, a Mexican version (literally titled Gossip Girl Acapulco, by the by) has been unveiled. When we did a little digging, we realized that the show has actually spawned a bunch of foreign remakes -- including a Chinese version, a Turkish version, and an anime version. But the Mexican version seems to be the one that most closely resembles the original show, and has by far the most transfixing head-shots. Scroll below to find out how the Acapulco cast compares to the original.

nX9sv.jpgSerena Van Der Woodsen - Sofía Lopez-Hario
Sadly, the "Serena" character seems to be the one that producers tried the hardest to re-create exactly. But will Sisniega nail Blake Lively's signature twenty-pieces-of-gum-in-my-mouth mumble? Ohhnley tahmm whell tall.

aVi67.jpgBlair Waldorf - Bárbara Fuenmayor
She's not wearing headband, and that's utter sacrilege.

jz9R2.jpgChuck Bass - Max Zaga
We actually feel like this a pretty damn good Acapulco-fied vision of Chuck's style and look, a summer twist on the New York version's luxe, usually dark-hued blazers and neckties (with perfect hair to match). And we've gotta give Vadhir points for the pout. Still, we wish they'd done a literal translation of his name and gone with "Carlos Róbalo."

F4k0j.jpgDan Humphrey - Daniel Parra
Diego Amozurrutia looks a little too smiley and "on" for Dan, who is human Ambien.

Dvd3k.jpgNate Archibald - Nico de la Vega
Speaking of Ambien, Nate has always bored us. The actor who plays Nate similarly bores us (and is American, BTW) so that's a wash.

sYXAh.jpgJenny Humphrey - Jenny Parra
We really hope they stick to the U.S. Gossip Girl roots and goth up Little J -- Pequeña J? We cannot see this girl even approaching Taylor Momsen-level eyeliner craziness.

FSJmy.jpgVanessa Abrams - Vanessa García
Not bad, not bad. Just put Vanessa in an unflattering boho-chic dress and no one will know the difference.

James Urbaniak, Henry Rollins, Maria Bamford in Dinosaur Jr.'s "Pierce the Morning Rain" Video


Prolific actor and even more prolific tweeter James Urbaniak stars in this clip as an audiophile dad searching for the perfect car stereo from which to blast J. Mascis's guitar jam (and Rick Ross's "Holy Ghost"). When he finds it, he lapses into a synaesthetic reverie where he's assaulted by Mascis's former SST labelmate Henry Rollins. Maria Bamford plays the apprehensive wife. The whole thing's directed by Scott Jacobson (Bob's Burgers); the album, I Bet on Sky, was released last fall by Jagjaguwar.

Bonus: here's a shot of Dinosaur Jr frontman J. Mascis's upcoming guest spot on Portlandia.


Morning Funnies: What Gay Men Think of Vaginas


What gay men think of vaginas. This is the best. [via Jezebel]

Eliot Glazer's amazing power walking fitness video with SNL's Kate McKinnon. Tush against bush. [via Splitsider]

Screen shot 2013-01-18 at 10.23.41 AM.png50 million high fives to Deadspin. [via Daily Dot]

Two dogs Skyping. [via Tastefully Offensive]

tumblr_mdrdkgngS01qz7a6ko1_1280.pngGreat plan. [via Rats Off]

40819870018.jpegHow do we join? [via Tall Whitney]

FeE40.gifInsert cartoon slide whistle and 'boing' sound effect here. [via Imgur]

40748486928.jpegThe leader of the cats. [via Pizzza Time]

tumblr_mgr234wEG41qm6sfao1_500.gifHey weekend! Let's do this. [via Laughter Key]

Remember J.C. Lodge's "Telephone Love?"


Try to imagine a more gentle and innocent time.  Think about courtship before GRINDR or BLENDR, before Te'o and his imaginary girlfriend. Do you remember "Telephone Love" by J.C. Lodge? "You sound so sweet on the line, you make my day every time." It was one of the first dancehall reggae songs -- a more "digital" type of reggae that became popular in the early 80s -- to cross over to hip-hop and R&B radio here in New York in 1988. The video is pretty minimal but the beach/bikini vibe looks good on a cold day. Also, check out the "watermelon" phone around 3:05.

Style Scraps: Vogue Made a Sandy-Themed Shoot + PAPER Cover Stars Designing For Kmart

Screen shot 2013-01-18 at 11.15.54 AM.pngScreen shot 2013-01-18 at 11.16.24 AM.pngScreen shot 2013-01-18 at 11.16.11 AM.pngWhile we're completely behind Vogue's continuing efforts to raise money for Hurricane Sandy, doing a big, Sandy-themed shoot featuring first responders mixed with models wearing extremely expensive dresses was...maybe not such a good idea? [via Slate]

michelle-obama-bangs.jpgMichelle Obama has bangs. Keep calm and carry on. [via Gawker]

galliano-is-back-oscar-de-la-renta.jpgOscar de la Renta will be hosting John Galliano at his studio for the next few weeks, which marks the first time Galliano has really been publicly involved with fashion in a few years. It's not clear what he's going to do there (most are interpreting de la Renta's invite as a gesture) but he had this to say: "I am an alcoholic ... I have been in recovery for the past two years...I am grateful to Oscar beyond words for inviting me to spend time with him in the familiar surroundings of a design studio...His support and faith in me is humbling." [via The Cut]

Screen shot 2013-01-18 at 11.44.43 AM.pngBetsey Johnson, on kids these days: "When I was growing up there were no initials. Now I've been told that I have the ADD and the XYZ and whatever." We love her. [via Fashionista]

_ON_0450.450x675.JPGBecause Sarah Burton is pregnant (with twins, by the way), McQueen will have a small presentation -- not a runway show -- for Fall 2013. We'll miss the drama. [via The Cut; photo via Style.com]

sruli-recht-stomach-ring.jpgEw, ew, ew: Icelandic fashion designer Sruli Recht had a bit of skin surgically removed from his belly, then had it salted, tanned, and mounted on a 24 carat gold band. Here it is, in all its hairy glory. [via Dezeen]

nicki-minaj-adam-levine-clothing-lines.jpgTwo ex-PAPER cover stars, one fashion line: Nicki Minaj and Adam Levine, musicians-cum-reality-show-hosts extraordinaire, are lending their creative talents to KMart's Shop Your Way line in 2013. [via MTV]

david-beckham-bodywear-ss13.jpgHere's a first look at the new David Beckham Bodywear for H&M ads. If you want to take a much, much closer look, click on the picture. [via Design Scene]

Fifteen Faces to Watch Out For at Sundance This Year

The Sundance Film Festival kicked off in Park City yesterday and, amid the hundreds of actors, directors and producers in attendance for their work, here are fifteen we think you should have on your radars.

936full-lake-bell.jpegLake Bell: While Lake Bell has quickly made a name for herself as an actress by playing uptight fauxhemian Rachel Chapman on How to Make It In America, awesomely twisted Dr. Cat Black on Children's Hospital and a trophy wife in It's Complicated, she's about to start building her reputation as a director when her feature-length directorial debut premieres at Sundance. The film, In a World..., also features Bell in the lead role as a struggling vocal coach who -- inspired by a father known as "the reigning king of movie-trailer voice-over artists" -- decides to make a career change and go after voiceover work. The flick also features comedians Demetri Martin and Michaela Watkins and her Children's Hospital co-stars Rob Corddry and Ken Marino.

danedehaan_sundance.jpgDane DeHaan: Dane DeHaan has already taped arcs on cable dramas True Blood and In Treatment, and had an unnamed role in Lincoln, but will be hard to avoid this year with parts in thrillers The Place Beyond the Pines (with Ryan Gosling and Bradley Cooper) and Devil's Knot (with Reese Witherspoon and Colin Firth). Next year, he will replace James Franco as Harry Osborn in The Amazing Spider-Man 2. But first: he's headed to Sundance in Kill Your Darlings, a film that sees him starring against Daniel Radcliffe's Allen Ginsberg (another former Franco role!) as Beat writer Lucien Carr, who was convicted of killing an elder admirer.

skylan_sundance.jpgSkylan Brooks: The adolescent Brooks leads a cast that includes Anthony Mackie, Jeffrey Wright, and American Idol alumnae Jennifer Hudson and Jordin Sparks as "Mister" in The Inevitable Defeat of Mister and Pete, a summer-in-the-city adventure story soundtracked (and executive-produced) by Alicia Keys.

Shareeka-Epps_sundance.jpgShareeka Epps: Most people know Epps from her starring role alongside Ryan Gosling in  Half Nelson and the actress has grown up quite a bit since then. You can next see her playing a girl who's pregnant with a child that is not her boyfriend's in David Andalman's 90s-era coming-of-age tale Milkshake (see above) and we think she's someone to keep your eye on in 2013. 

scoot-mcnairy-premiere-argo-01.jpegScoot McNairy: If you made it into a movie theater this fall/winter, chances are you saw Scoot McNairy on the screen. With key roles in Argo, Killing Them Softly and Promised Land, the actor is on the verge of becoming a household name and his role in Lynn Shelton's latest film, Touchy Feely, may be the final tipping point. Though details on his character are surprisingly scarce, the movie itself centers on a quirky enough premise: Rosemarie DeWitt plays a massage therapist who spontaneously develops an aversion to physical contact, which causes major problems at her job and in her relationship. At the same time, her emotionally catatonic dentist brother starts seeing an influx of patients after word spreads that he has a "healing touch."

alicia van couvering_sundance.jpgAlicia Van Couvering: Having produced such Spirit Award-friendly flicks like Lena Dunham's Tiny Furniture, Junebug, Todd Solondz's Palindromes, Ry Russo-Young's Nobody Walks and Whit Stillman's Damsels in Distress among others, Alicia Van Couvering is definitely and independent producer to watch. This year, she's headed to Sundance for The Apocalypse, a film short directed by Andrew Zuchero and starring Martin Starr about a group of bored friends that suddenly stumble upon an awful way to end the monotony (hint: it involves exploding body parts but that's all we'll reveal). You can watch the short HERE.  [Photo by Owen Hoffmann/PatrickMcMullan.com]

danai-gurira2sundance.jpgDanai Gurira: Danai Gurira has been everywhere lately, what with roles in Treme and The Walking Dead, and now she's getting back in the movie biz with a lead role in the drama Mother of George. Directed by Andrew Dosunmu, who has worked as a photographer and creative director at YSL, the film revolves around Gurira's character Adenike and her struggle to conceive a child as well as adjust to the differences between life in Brooklyn and life in Nigeria following her marriage.

99percentsundance.jpgFilmmakers behind 99%: The Occupy Wall Street Collaborative Film: Aaron Aites, Audrey Ewell, Nina Krstic, and Lucian Read are all credited as directors on this documentary, which, in true horizontal fashion, draws on supporters across the country for both footage and (via Kickstarter) funds. Aites and Ewell previously made the 2009 black metal doc Until the Light Takes Us; Krstic and Read both have experience in documentary TV.

kaya-scodelario-11607504.jpegKaya Scodelario: Fans of the original British version of Skins might recognize Kaya Scodelario for her role as Effy Stonem, the troubled younger sister of Nicholas Hoult's Tony Stonem and, later, a central figure on the teen soap series. Now the young actress might make a few more fans stateside, thanks to a leading role in Emanuel and the Truth About Fishes, in which Scodelario plays a young woman who begins a friendship with a neighbor that eerily resembles her deceased mother. Directed by Francesca Gregorini and co-produced by Rooney Mara and Tatiana Von Furstenberg, the film also stars Jessica Biel and Alfred Molina.

miles_teller_sundance.jpgMiles Teller: Even if you've never heard his name, get used to it because you'll be seeing quite a bit of Miles Teller soon. His starring role in Sundance film The Spectular Now as a popular -- but alcoholic -- high-school guy with no plans for the future who becomes involved with a less-popular classmate played by Shailene Woodley, is joined by a smattering of roles in films like Get a Job, 21 And Over, Two Night Stand, and Are We Officially Dating?, making him poised to be the next go-to guy for college flicks and buddy comedies.

tequan-richmond-everybody-hate-chris.jpgTeQuan Richmond: Having played younger brother Drew Rock on Everybody Hates Chris for five years, the 20-year-old Richmond tries something else entirely in Blue Caprice, playing Lee Boyd Malvo, a perpetrator, along with John Allen Muhammad (Isaiah Washington), of October 2002's Beltway sniper attacks.

caseywilson_sundance.jpgCasey Wilson: Wilson is one of our favorite women in comedy, seeing as she's responsible for some of the best one-liners and catch phrases from Happy Endings. It looks like she's about to make us cackle again as Chloe in Ass Backwards, a comedy that centers on two best friends who take a cross-country trip back home in order to win a beauty pageant that they lost when they were children. We hope there's a Honey Boo-Boo cameo.

Zal_Batmanglij_by_Gage_Skidmore.jpegZal Batmanglij: After 2011's Sound of My Voice, director Zal Batmanglij (brother of Vampire Weekend's Rostam Batmanglij) teams up again with Brit Marling on his sophomore feature, The East, a film centered on an ex-FBI agent's infiltration of an anarchist collective that is thought responsible for a spate of attacks on high-powered corporate CEOs. In addition to Marling, Batmanglij has enlisted Alexander Skarsgård, Ellen Page, Patricia Clarkson, Shiloh Fernandez and Toby Kebbell to round out his psychological thriller. And, with Ridley Scott tapped to co-produce, we bet the young director will quickly start adding more credits to his name.

michaelbjordansundance.jpgMichael B. Jordan: At only 24-years-old, Michael B. Jordan has appeared on three critically-acclaimed TV shows -- The Wire, Friday Night Lights and Parenthood -- and his upcoming starring role in Fruitvale might finally cause people to associate the moniker with more than just basketball. In the film, which is based on true events, Jordan plays a young Bay Area man who was shot to death by BART officers at the stop that lends its name to the movie title. Directed by 26-year-old Bay Area filmmaker Ryan Coogler, the film also stars Octavia Spencer, Ahna O'Reilly, Chad Michael Murray, Kevin Durand and Melonie Diaz.

HannahFidell_sundance.pngHannah Fidell: Fidell wrote, directed and produced A Teacher, her debut feature about a teacher-student affair in suburban Texas, that reunited the director with Lindsay Burdge, the star of her 2010 post-grad mini-feature We're Glad You're Here.

Nick Cave's Soundsuits to Graze Grand Central

Artist Nick Cave will lend 30 of his trademark recycled-material "Soundsuits" -- to be occupied by 60 dancers -- to the iconic train station's hundredth-anniversary celebrations, ArtInfo reports. The horse-shaped suits will perform choreographed routines, accompanied by live harpists, throughout the last week of March. The performance, called "Heard * NY" and presented by Creative Time, coincides with the On Time/Grand Central at 100 exhibition.

Cave is not to be confused with the leader of the Bad Seeds, who will release their fifteenth studio album, Push the Sky Away, next month.

Photograph by Travis Magee, Courtesy Creative Time and MTA Arts for Transit.

Scenes From Milan Fashion Week

New York Fashion Week might be a few weeks away, but in Milan, fashion has already turned to the Fall 2013 collections. PAPERMAG photographers Pierguido Grassano and Anzhelika Ardasheva bring you some of the beautiful faces on the runways in Italy this week.





The Inaugural Steez Hip-Hop Playlist

In this weekly column, MC/DJ Hesta Prynn pairs pop culture stories with an original playlist.


In hip-hop when we talk about "presidents," nine times out of ten we're talking about the dead kind. That, of course, was before Barack Obama took office. Once upon a time playing saxophone on Arsenio was cool. Our current president, however, is fist-bumping with an Independent Woman, bromancing with Jay-Z and singing Al Green. It's safe to say the bar has been significantly raised. In honor of the second inauguration of the Dopest President Ever, this week's Five 'n' Five pairs the five coolest presidents with their '90s hip-hop theme songs.

1. Barack Obama - Nas: "The World is Yours"

Before the hook of this song sparked the most famous East Coast rap battle ever, Nas gave us food for thought with "I'm out for presidents to represent me. I'm out for dead presidents to represent me." In the end, he got both. Congrats Barack, the world is yours for four more years.

2. Bill Clinton - Wreckx-n-Effect: "Rump Shaker"

Our second coolest president loved the saxophone as much as he loved an ample woman. Literally all he wanted to do was umma zoom zoom in a boom boom, and by "umma zoom zoom" I mean do nasty things with a cigar and by "boom boom" I mean Monica Lewinsky.

3. Abraham Lincoln - Queen Latifah: "U.N.I.T.Y."

Often credited with bringing our nation together, this amazing feminist anthem is a perfect theme song for Lincoln. A reaction to the conventional images of women in hip-hop at the time, this song showcased Latifah's ferocity and willingness to buck the current trend. The circumstances are different but the story is the same. Who you callin' a bitch?

4. John Kennedy - Pete Rock and CL Smooth: "They Reminisce Over You (T.R.O.Y.)"

The wistful tone of this record could soundtrack a black-and-white film of Jack and Jackie too perfectly. Everyone reminisces over Kennedy.

5. Benjamin Franklin - Puff Daddy featuring Notorious B.I.G., Lil' Kim & The LOX: "All About the Benjamins"

So much talk of dead presidents and yet the namesake of "the Benjamin" was not a president at all. This founding father (allegedly) discovered electricity by flying a kite during a rainstorm. These days he is more commonly seen "making it rain" at the strip club. Full circle moment.

Eight Items or Less: Confetti System's New P.S. 1 Environment

1. New York art and design firm CONFETTISYSTEM created an "immersive environment" called "100 Arrangements" for MoMA PS1 (22-25 Jackson Avenue, Long Island City). The company has worked on numerous events with PAPER/ExtraExtra including the 10th-anniversary party for Opening Ceremony. The PS1 show "features new and older design elements that are suspended from above and can be adjusted to varying heights to produce nearly endless permutations." You can check it out during the museum's winter open house this Sunday, January 20, from 12 to 6 p.m. Also that day: the first New York solo opening by Cyprien Gaillard, a performance by Ed Atkins at 3 p.m. and an appearance by L.A. rap legend Egytian Lover around 4 p.m.
(Image: CONFETTISYSTEM. Stage design for Warm 2012 at MoMA PS1 (detail). Courtesy the artists.)

2. New York billionaire/mogul Robert F.X. Sillerman bought Miami's biggest nightclub company, The Opium Group (Mansion, Set, Mokai, etc.) and is negotiating to buy that city's second biggest, MMG (LIV, Story, etc.). He's the dude who owns Graceland, American Idol, etc. and has been looking to invest in EDM. (Miami New Times; photo © Patrick McMullan)

3. The acclaimed LA Geffen Contemporary art exhibit, "Blues for Smoke," is moving to NYC's Whitney Museum (945 Madison Avenue) from February 7 to April 28. The exhibit looks outside of the music genre, to include the visual arts, film and literature, as well as live performances.
(Image: Bob Thompson, Garden of Music, 1960. Oil on canvas. Wadsworth Atheneum, Hartford, Connecticut. The Ella Gallup Sumner and Mary Catlin Sumner Collection; courtesy of Michael Rosenfeld Gallery LLC, New York, NY)

4. This year's edition of the NADA New York art fair will take place at Basketball City (Pier 36, 299 South Street) from May 10 to 12. And, yes, that's the same week as Frieze. (Photo by Bill Holsinger-Robinson on Flickr)

5. Don't forget: If you're down in Miami this weekend, Pink Martini is playing at The Fillmore (1700 Washington Avenue, South Beach) on Saturday night, January 19. Tickets are HERE

6. Vibrator With 3 Balls Can't Win EU Trademark, Court Says. (Bloomberg; photo via Flickr)