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Articles on this Page
- 06/04/15--07:05: _Let The New York Ti...
- 06/04/15--07:30: _ICYMI: Jake Gyllenh...
- 06/04/15--07:35: _American Apparel Go...
- 06/04/15--08:30: _"You Have to Make N...
- 06/04/15--09:50: _Tink Takes On Tazer...
- 06/04/15--10:00: _Willow Smith Is Als...
- 06/04/15--10:31: _Do You Like Fashion...
- 06/04/15--11:30: _Kelly Clarkson Neut...
- 06/04/15--11:30: _UPDATED: What Is De...
- 06/05/15--02:00: _Watch Teens In Mosc...
- 06/05/15--02:00: _Why Police Departme...
- 06/05/15--02:02: _Ride Into the Weeke...
- 06/05/15--04:30: _Play With Björk's 3...
- 06/05/15--05:30: _The 5 Best Albums a...
- 06/05/15--06:10: _The Feminine Moi-st...
- 06/05/15--07:00: _Ice-T and Coco's Fi...
- 06/05/15--07:20: _Lifetime Cast a Bun...
- 06/05/15--08:30: _Static Youth to Son...
- 06/05/15--08:40: _Kendall Jenner's Fa...
- 06/05/15--10:15: _Adult Swim Announce...
- 06/04/15--07:05: Let The New York Times and this Dog Teach You About Summer Menswear
- 06/04/15--07:30: ICYMI: Jake Gyllenhaal Is Dabbling In Metaphysics Now
- 06/04/15--09:50: Tink Takes On Tazer's "Wet Dollars" in a New Brooklyn-Shot Video
- 06/04/15--10:00: Willow Smith Is Also Starring In an Ad for Marc Jacobs
- 06/04/15--11:30: Kelly Clarkson Neuters Rihanna's "Bitch Better Have My Money"
- 06/04/15--11:30: UPDATED: What Is Dev Hynes Planning for NYC?
- 06/05/15--02:00: Why Police Departments Should Start Re-Branding
- 06/05/15--02:02: Ride Into the Weekend With Dam-Funk's New EP
- 06/05/15--04:30: Play With Björk's 360° Interactive Video for "Stonemilker"
- 06/05/15--05:30: The 5 Best Albums and 5 Best Songs In May
- 06/05/15--06:10: The Feminine Moi-stique: Miss Piggy Pens Her Feminist Manifesto
- 06/05/15--07:00: Ice-T and Coco's First Talk Show Teaser is Here
- 06/05/15--10:15: Adult Swim Announces Their Bonkers 2015 Summer Singles Line-Up
If there is any law that governs the internet, it is that any object, activity, or aesthetic can be combined with animals in some way. Nowhere is that more apparent than in the phenomenon of Bodhi the Menswear Dog, an animal that appears to be so pleasing to look at when you put him in human clothes that he has spawned a book called Menswear Dog Presents the New Classics. Now, Bodhi has modeled looks for summer destination weddings for the ever-on-point New York Times Style section. Does it make you sad that these expensive items of clothing look much better on a dog, than they ever would on you? What? No, I'm not crying. Check out a couple of the looks below, then head to the story for full blurbs and more of a dog in man's clothing. (photos by Yena Kim and David Fung for The New York Times.)
In his July cover story interview for Esquire UK, Jake Gyllenhaal revealed the secret to his creative process: "[I]f you spend enough time in whatever environment your character would exist in -- the way I spent six months with police officers -- then the molecules of that environment must transfer somehow. And then you put it on screen, and people go, 'I feel something that I don't normally feel.'"
Gyllenhaal was referring to the six months he spent shadowing Los Angeles cops and sheriffs in preparation for End of Watch, a 2012 crime drama thriller in which he plays a LAPD officer. We'd heard he immersed himself in the lifestyle of his character, but we had no idea he did it under the principle that "you literally accumulate the molecules of the space that you're in."
"We're like 90 per cent water, so naturally we are going to be affected by the moon when it's full: if the sea is, why wouldn't we be? That seems scientific to me," he continued.
Wait a second, Jake. You were just talking about befriending cops in LA. How'd you get on the topic of the moon? Maybe the transmission of these location-specific molecules is aided by LA's notorious smog? Seems scientific to me, to use his phrasing.
Next month, Gyllenhaal will be starring in Southpaw as a boxer caught between work and family. We can only hope he doesn't resort to any violent measures to accumulate the molecules for this role.
Only Dov Charney, a well-documented terrible piece of human garbage, could continue to make people feel bad for American Apparel, the company he founded that is now trying to get out from under his legacy of horrifying abuses of women and general insanity. With Charney suing the company after his ouster, The L.A. Times reports that American Apparel has secured a temporary restraining order against him, allowing it at least a semblance of peace to continue awkwardly trying to be socially conscious, free from the tic that threatens to suck its blood. While statements from Charney's lawyers make it seem like he will be complying with the restraining order for now, it's probably safest to continue wishing American Apparel and the rest of humanity the best in their efforts to avoid ever encountering him again.
Many artists take a circuitous route before they're able to launch their careers but Brooklyn-based R&B singer Bosco has a more interesting trajectory than most. A native of Savannah, GA who grew up singing in church and local talent shows, she went on to study fashion design at the Savannah College of Art and Design (SCAD) but couldn't shake the singing bug. While still in school, she performed cover songs at a local club before deciding she'd rather make her own music. She left SCAD her senior year, decamped for Atlanta, and eventually made the move to NYC a year ago. Through all this, she caught the eye of Fool's Gold head honcho A-Trak who signed her to his label and released her first proper EP, BOY, this past Tuesday. We had the chance to chat with the rising singer about everything from the challenges of being a transplant to why fashion continues to be integral to her creative life.
What are some of the ideas you're hoping to get across in BOY?
I think a lot of the EP has to do with my personal experiences being an artist and the struggles of that. The song, "Gold Ghost," for example, explains the ups and downs of the industry and trying to be an indie artist and getting people to pay attention to what you're doing. But mostly I just wanted people to hear my vocals. A couple of my other tracks have been dance-y, and it was important to me to really solidify my sound.
What are some of the struggles in particular you're describing on the EP?
I think whenever you're starting something new, it's really challenging to get people to notice or take you seriously, whether it's from the lack of funds or just the lack of visibility being, in my case, an artist coming from Atlanta. The city's known for just being about urban and trap music, but we have a really, really cool creative scene and art scene down there that really doesn't get that much visibility. We don't have major publications to really vouch for the artists down there. So coming from that very grassroots, post-punk, DIY area and trying to find the funding to really execute your ideas is challenging. Wanting to produce a certain quality of work can sometimes get the best of you because you have all these ideas in your head and you're like, "Oh my god, I want to do this, and I want to do this, but how does this dot connect to this dot, or how can I reach out to this person?"
It can be overwhelming.
It's definitely overwhelming when you don't have the resources. But once you get so many "no's," you'll eventually figure out how to press through. I was talking to my manager, Josh, and he was like, "Alright, you have to get through the resistance. You have to just keep pushing through that." And most people don't make it to the other side, but I'm surrounded by people who continue to push me, and I push them, and vice versa.
You moved from Atlanta to Brooklyn a year ago -- where are you living in the city?
How do you like it?
I really, really like Bushwick a lot -- it reminds me of my days in college at SCAD [Savannah College of Art and Design], just seeing street art and graffiti off Morgan and Beacon's Closet and Flushing. I always run into so many artists -- I just ran into Juliana Huxtable the other day -- and people are really migrating towards that energy where you can experiment with so many things. Everyone's really collaborating right now.
How do you find the collaboration and the creative scene in Brooklyn compared to that in Atlanta?
Atlanta is very family-oriented -- it's like, "you're my homie. I got you." Because the trap and hip-hop scene is so prominent, if you're in a different scene, you're forced to create experiences that don't already exist. It forces you to make shit happen. We would do pop-up shops or pop-up art shows and have liquor sponsors and just create our own scene because we didn't really have a media outlet there [where] we could really show it. I I took a lot of those very DIY tactics and use them even now. Atlanta definitely helps you grow up.
Because there's really not anything popping down there besides what you create. You have to make noise for people to look.
Have there been any unexpected challenges to living and working in NYC?
I think this place is a monster and you have to figure out how to move here. I think I spent the first couple months just researching where to be, who is who. But I will say that the people here, the creatives, aren't really fast to work with you because you have something to prove if you're not from here. Like, "Oh, you're from Georgia," or "Oh, you're from Atlanta, but you're not doing trap, so what are you doing, because there's no fashion down there?" You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, there's a bias, a snobbery.
I feel that your work should just speak for you and you just have to prove people wrong. In Atlanta, it's easier to get people to work with you.
You mentioned attending SCAD, what did you study there?
I went to school for fashion design. I was really into bold colors and weird shapes and I minored in fibers. What I really gravitated to was menswear -- I only figured that out my last year. But I dropped out my senior year and moved to Atlanta because I was like, "I'm doing music, I've had enough of this."
Tell me about your time singing covers at a Savannah club.
I was a house singer at this nightclub called Tantra and I started getting a name and people would come to my show. I was singing Erykah Badu, I was singing Rihanna, I was singing Chaka Khan and Rufus, I was singing Stevie Wonder songs. Didn't get too much into Beyoncé, but... What else did I do? Jill Scott. A lot of soul music. But I just felt like, "I don't wanna fucking be a cover singer and sing everybody else's songs." Eventually I started writing my own music and incorporating original music with covers. And then I just kind of outgrew the scene and moved to Atlanta, just like that.
What's your relationship like to fashion now?
My fashion is just as important as my music. My personal style is basically a way that I communicate my feelings or what I want to look like.
How would you describe your style?
It's a mix between anime and street punk with a little bit of androgyny.
Who are some of the people who inspire you, fashion-wise?
Gwen Stefani for sure. Seeing what she was able to do with No Doubt in the beginning stages because of the lack of funds -- that was her best time in fashion. Respect to her. Leaps and bounds of respect. Tilda Swinton is also dope -- love her. Drew Barrymore, '94.
I like that. That's so specific.
Yeah, it's actually when she had the part with the very bleached blonde [hair].
Get a copy of BOY HERE.
Revitalizing the stuttering track with her impeccable flow and razor-sharp wordplay, she spits lines like "he wasn't a married man till he gave me a ring" with an easy smirk and the kind of confidence most seasoned hip-hop veterans can't touch.
You like the good things in life, right? Art, food, good clothing, Gillian Anderson, good acting, cannibalism, dread, elaborately planned murders? Then start watching Hannibal, the best show on television (seriously), which returns for its third season tonight on NBC. The breadth of reasons to watch this show is staggering (that's a joke, which you won't get until you start watching). Here are a few of them:
With extremely well thought-out psychedelic sequences, corpses moved into breathtaking pieces of art -- particularly in scenes where series protagonist Will Graham (Hugh Dancy) mentally reenacts the murders he is trying to solve -- and a rich color palate that is never, ever allowed to come anywhere close to "conventional,"Hannibal is easily the most visually pleasing series on the air -- far and above most movies. Death has never looked this good.
It's Got Great Clothes
Hannibal Lecter (Mads Mikkelsen) is all about looking good while he kills -- he even wears bespoke suits under his plastic murder outfit, just to make sure he doesn't ruin his clothes with blood. In this season, he gets to step up his fashion game enormously, alongside Gillian Anderson's Bedelia du Maurier, as they devour the best that Florence has to offer.
Filming food is notoriously difficult. But Hannibal presents the good doctor's cooking in a way that always, always makes it look both delicious and just the slightest bit off-putting -- we know what's actually in the dish.
And that's not even mentioning all of things that just make it great in general -- its measured, effective critique of cop show conventions (often by putting the viewer in the mind of the killer), its fantastic, purple writing, grim, enthralling performances, and its terrifying score. Suffice it to say: Hannibal is the show that the kind of teens who use Twin Peaks as a signifier of cool will be into in 20 years, and you'll be scrambling to pretend you watched it while it was on.
Just let it happen. Immerse yourself in the world of Hannibal. The first two seasons are available on Amazon Prime, and after you watch them you can appreciate all the ridiculously intense fan videos devoted to shipping Hannibal and Will. Shea Serrano has a fantastic coloring book featuring the characters over at Grantland, and Sean T. Collins has a great longer explanation of how powerful the show has become at Rolling Stone. Stay on top of the wave, and eat up.
Anyway? I'm gon announce some shit soon .. In like an hour or something.? For the New York heads ya get me-- Devonté Hynes (@devhynes) June 4, 2015
Nadia Bedzhanova's latest short film, Wasteland, she shows how today's technology has the power to bring modern kids together despite being miles and oceans apart. Dressed in clothes from designer Gosha Rubchinskiy and accompanied by the music of Ilya Mozhaev (W0WM0M) these teens from three different cities overcome global barriers and use internet to connect their lives of skating, meandering, and messaging.
Police departments everywhere have a serious problem and I have a modest proposal of how to solve it.
The problem is that the police are not trusted in the communities where they are most needed. My own experience in gentrified Manhattan is instructive here. I'm a law-abiding citizen who lives on Tompkins Square Park in the East Village. I see police every single day and I'm glad they are here to help out if necessary. Yet as I pass them, invariably ensconced in their cars, I try -- and fail -- to make eye contact, my efforts to humanize our experience earning me a blank stare in return. Nothing, nada. I nod and say hello. No reaction. No sign of recognition. I don't exist.
Serious crime in New York City (and generally nationwide) has been increasing in the last two years creating a problem for police (not to mention the rest of us). Mayor Bill de Blasio and police brass are increasing patrols in neighborhoods where the spike is the greatest, but recent protests against police brutality and the #blacklivesmatter movement puts the cops in a bit of a bind: Insert police in troubled areas and bad things are likely to happen. De Blasio says what's needed is for the police "to win trust in minority communities often most ravaged by violence."
But how is that going to happen? What steps are being taken to gain trust? Is there a plan? How can the police win trust if they're unwilling to interact with the community they are meant to protect.
What I propose is a community outreach program where police are posted in high pedestrian traffic areas with the purpose of actually speaking to passersby. They can say hi, be friendly and courteous, even smile. With foot patrols few and far between, the police need to come out of their cars, they need to meet and greet and put on a happy face. This is brand building at its most basic. Will this solve all of our problems? Definitely not. But it's a step in the right direction and we need our police to make the effort.
Dam-Funk is back, which means it's time for a good time -- or, as he puts it, "that funk with a smile and a tear." The Stone's Throw funk-master's 2013 record 7 Days of Funk, done in collaboration with a little-known recording artist named Snoopzilla, was quietly one of the best albums of the year, and certainly the funkiest. His latest, STFU, is a series of low-key but insistent instrumental jams, perfect for the tentative beginning of summer. (Also, he is currently on tour with Todd Rundgren, which is awesome.) It might not be as warm outside as you'd like for barbecuing, but if you stream and/or download STFU below, you'll forget about the cool temperature in no time. Promise.
As far as premature "song of summer" bids go, we could do a lot worse than the Jamie xx, Young Thug and Popcaan team-up "I Know There's Gonna Be (Good Times)" (which is capital-G great, but not the best thing on Jamie's luminous In Colour) or Fetty Wap's inescapable "Trap Queen" (though in all honesty, "Show You" is probably better). But May has just wrapped up, summer hasn't even officially started, and we have a lot of ground to cover and here's a good a place as any to start.
My Morning Jacket -- The Waterfall
Outside of diehard Bonnaroo faithfuls and fanatical Basement Tapes bootleg obsessives, a lot of people gave up on My Morning Jacket. After the success of their dizzying, genre-bending high-water mark Z, the band went even further left with the groove-focused Evil Urges (which is much better than most gave it credit for at the time), only to all but stall-out on 2011's forgettable Circuital. The perceived lack of pressure this time around seems to have been a much welcome boon, because with The Waterfall, Jim James and company seem as confident as they ever have been, deftly condensing all the aspects of their musical personality and introducing a few crucial new kinks. Far from a good-time rock record (though it often sounds like one), there's a hurt and meanness to the The Waterfall that makes it their richest, most slyly complex recording since Z. From the rousing "Big Decisions" to the starlit soul of closer "Only Memories Remain," My Morning Jacket reminds us that, as one of the best big-tent American rock bands we have, there is life beyond the Superjam.
Smurphy -- A Shapeless Pool of Lovely Pale Colours Suspended in the Darkness
Trying to describe Mexico City producer Jessica Smurphy's new album is no east feat. Like so many truly original pieces of work, it seems to be a lot all at once, and almost nothing at all. Confounding as it compelling, A Shapeless Pool of Lovely Pale Colours Suspended in the Darkness isn't terribly accessible at first blush -- in fact, it almost feels like Smurphy is giving her listeners a cold shoulder in favor of retreating into her own headspace, like a strange PC Music offshoot for manic depressives. But with a little time, it begins to show its true colors through quirky percussion (the errant scuttle of some mechanical arthropod, for example), alien vocal incantations and texturally degraded loops. At times, the record can feel like it's getting away from Smurphy, and she's doing her best to try and control her malfunctioning gear. But in these moments of controlled chaos come moments of clarity, beauty and humor, like on "Aquarius Risinn," which sounds like a chopped-n-screwed Portishead. By the time you're finished, you can't but feel a little bit dumb trying to explain it. Because sitting right in front of you the whole time was the album title, which is pretty much the only logical way to describe this thing.
Holly Herndon -- Platform
Unlike her contemporary Smurphy, Holly Herndon is more forthcoming with her intentions. Her beautifully splintered new album Platform deals with the rapidly shrinking gap between what it means to be human and what it means to be machine, with results that make Ex Machina look more than a little rudimentary. Using found sounds from her daily life and an extensive group of collaborators, Platform works just as well as an art installation (see the creepy, futuristic sonic infomercial "Lock Leak") as it does a pop record (the equilibrium-fucked single "Chorus"). Too bad Philip K. Dick wasn't around to hear it.
Bitchin' Bajas -- Transporteur EP
A lot of people approach ambient music from a purely functional standpoint: For relaxation, for powering through a deadline (oh hey!), for yoga. And the music that Chicago electronic trio Bitchin' Bajas makes can be used for all of those things, especially their New Age-y 2013 release Bitchitronics (their first for Drag City). But new EP Transporteur, which functions more like an album thanks to its lengthy four sections, feels like a step in a more approachable direction. The aptly-titled "Marimba" vibrates with a curious, almost nervous energy, while closer "No Tabac"'s handclaps and horn skronk create something borderline funky. A welcome testament to the versatility of ambient.
Chris Stapleton -- Traveller
It's no secret that in the past few years, country music has infiltrated pop music in a significant way. And though you might not know the name, Chris Stapleton is responsible for a chunk of its steadily growing mainstream relevance, having written songs for everyone from George Straight to Darius Rucker (he's even dipped into the risible sub-genre of "bro-country," penning tracks for the likes of superstars like Luke Bryan). But on his debut album Traveller, Stapleton is all about authenticity, offering a radio-friendly take on outlaw country. From his unruly mane to his excellent take on David Allan Coe's "Tennessee Whiskey," Stapleton feels like the real deal.
Passion Pit, "Where the Sky Hangs"
Released at the end of April, Passion Pit's new album Kindred made less of a splash than it probably should have. Granted, it didn't have the festival-ready immediacy of the Michael Angelakos-helmed project's 2012 breakthrough Gossamer, but the past month has proven that Kindred is a substantial grower. The best piece of supporting evidence to that claim is probably "Where the Sky Hangs," a Hall & Oates-styled soft rocker with a memorably melancholy boogie. It has all the open-hearted earnestness you'd expect from Passion Pit, but driven home in a much lower gear. Restraint is a good look on them.
Destroyer, "Dream Lover"
It's been over four years since Dan Bejar's last proper LP as Destroyer, Kaputt, was released. Funny thing is, it really doesn't seem like that long ago. A lot of that can be attributed to the fact that Kaputt was such a generous, lasting piece of work that it sounds as new and vibrant today as it did back then. So it's not much of surprise that "Dream Lover" (not a Mariah cover, sadly), the first single from the forthcoming Poison Season, is afforded a similarly timeless quality. It's Bejar at his most overblown, aping the E Street Band with a devilish wink. "Ah shit, here comes the sun," he sings, dancing past the dawn and into the daylight.
Little Mix, "Black Magic"
Little Mix have been a thing for a few years in the UK (they were the first group act to win "The X Factor"), but never managed to garner any name recognition in the States (save for maybe member Perrie Edwards, who is engaged to former One Directioner Zayn Malik). But "Black Magic" might change that, a modern take on '90s girl-power tropes that comes off with a familiar, effortless charm. Bonus points for big-upping The Craft in the video.
Neon Indian, "Annie"
Though it may be too early for a reassessment of chillwave -- the often unfairly maligned mid-to-late-00s niche genre movement -- it's always been obvious that Alan Palomo, aka Neon Indian, was the best thing to come from it. Not only do his first two albums hold up extremely well, we now have "Annie," a new single that finds Palomo toying with ragga rhythms and '80s new wave radio hooks. And it kind of sounds like Toto? Trust us, it's a good thing.
Boogie, "Oh My"
The first thing you see in the video for Boogie's atom-smashing new track "Oh My" is the Compton rapper cracking his neck. It's a classic "I got next" look, but based on the sheer strength of "Oh My," that subtle but telling little introduction feels justified. That said, it remains to be seen if Boogie has the stuff to become a great rapper, but it would be difficult for anyone -- and a newcomer in particular -- to try to rise above Jahlil Beats concrete-cracking production and that simple but irresistible hook. Here's hoping it gets the traction it deserves.
"I believe that any woman who refuses to accept society's preconceived notions of who or what they can be is a feminist. I believe any woman who is willing to struggle, strive -- and if necessary learn karate -- to make their mark in the world is a feminist."
"I refused to accept someone else's definition of my life and my future. I knew there was something bigger and better out there -- and that I could achieve it if I never, ever gave up. Thanks to grit, fortitude, perseverance, the inspiration of other great feminists and the aforementioned karate, I did in fact achieve those dreams."
"What is the future of feminism? The answer is obvious -- feminism's future must be proud, positive, powerful, perseverant, and, wherever possible, alliterative. It must believe in itself, share its triumphs, overcome its setbacks and inspire future generations."You go, Mademoiselle. Read the full manifesto here.
Wednesday night in the heart of Chinatown a small storefront with grimy windows reading "Arts and Performance Space VIDEO" opened its doors for the first time in ten years. New Release, an art show curated by Half Gallery director Erin Goldberger featuring paintings and sculptures from artists Phillip Ashley and B. Thom Stevenson, welcomed the LES art crowd, as well as some curious neighbors, into the revamped video rental store. Inside, guests wandered around a room featuring a case of VHS tapes, mini TVs playing static video, a beaded curtain and even an Adults-Only section in the bathroom, taking in Ashley's and Stevenson's works along with a number of short videos made by contemporary artists such as Jeanette Hayes, Leo Fitzpatrick, Peter Sutherland and many more, transferred onto VHS and playing on a big screen in the space. Many of the artists who had given videos were in attendance, including Hayes and Fitzpatrick, as well as familiar art world faces like Bill Powers and India Menuez. But the space had an intimate neighborhood feel unlike most art openings, with a group of young skaters doing ollies on the street and a relaxed crowd that just wanted to hang out until closing, talking to their friends. It was almost as if we were back in 1992, except everyone had iPhones and the skaters, in bourgeois Millennial fashion, were drinking rosé instead of Budweiser.
Thursday night came with a change of scenery, on the clean streets in Chelsea and white walls of 303 Gallery. We'd come to check out Design Office: The City is a Garden, Kim Gordon's new solo show at the space. Gordon was in attendance and she spoke of her sculptures and paintings that commented on the beautification of New York City. Fake plastic hedges were placed among crumpled canvases, each with the names of high rises or building developments scrawled across them in Gordon's signature dripping black text. "I don't live in New York any more so I have fresh eyes" Gordon remarked, seemingly unenthused to be talking about her art in front of so many people who just wanted to ask her about her music. "I keep seeing all this greenery and with it, these giant co-op buildings. It's nice, but at the same time it creates an environment for people who aren't actually living in NYC.... It's inviting consumerism. And art is part of that process."
Gordon apprehensively took a few questions and when the talk was through, the group cheered as if she had just performed "Teen Age Riot" at Lollapalooza in 1995. Rolling her eyes she tried to avoid the fans who wanted her signature on their fresh memoir copies. We wished we could've whisked her off to Chinatown where, in a past-present hybrid, a video store on a gritty street was playing Clerks on the big screen and the rosé kept flowing.
Since she appeared on the first episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians in 2007, then a somewhat-gangly preteen, Kendall Jenner has been famous. Over the past six months, the model has seen her professional profile grow to match her reality-show one, strutting catwalks for Marc Jacobs and Chanel and landing campaigns for Estee Lauder and Calvin Klein. The new swell of professional opportunities has also brought a swell of publications eager to talk with Jenner about her burgeoning career beyond the confines of the E! network. While she may only be 19-years old, Jenner's interviews uncover a logic and reasoning, a lack of interiority so complete that it becomes its own school of great philosophical thought, a hyper-exteriority. Giving soundbites filled with obtuse observations about fame and its trappings, the young Jenner's parsing of how she views her own highly-visible life is a class in a new kind of reality-show metaphysics. We've pored over her recent interviews to present a guide to the koans of Kendall.
Kendall 101: Self-Presentation
"Instagram is my edit of my life." -- Vogue, November 2014
For the great masses, Instagram is a tool for sharing our meals, our cats, our cats' meals, etc. But Jenner knows it is so much more. Like the Pythagoreans before her, Kendall has divined that everything in the world, both physical and abstract, is derived from numbers. Popularity. Chanel Bags. Met Gala invitations. The existence of all these things begins with numbers. As her over 27 million dedicated followers demonstrate, Jenner has maximized her grasp of the conceit that numbers are the basis of all things.
Kendall 202: Zen and the Art of Dental Maintenance
"I used to have the craziest fear of losing teeth. I would have nightmares about that all the time. But it's the craziest thing, because I feel like that's one of the easiest things to fix. You just get veneers or something." -- Interview, June 2014
Dreaming about teeth falling out is a common nightmare, and can imply that the dreamer feels like they're losing control. It might be easy to ascribe this to a lack of control over her life, but Jenner in fact has gone deeper. She shows a keen understanding of the metaphysical debate about the existence of objects, and the mind-body distinction. Much as Descartes determined that the mind must exist separate from the body, Jenner determines that there are abstract and material aspects to the world. Jenner takes it a step further, not only acknowledging the duality of abstract thoughts like nightmares and physical objects like veneers, but then going so far as to establish the primacy of objects in the world. In Kendallism, if abstract questions perturb you, look to a material good to fix the problem.
Kendall 303: Time Is Always Rolling
"It's scary. Life is scary. It's just scary to think how fast everything is rolling and you can't stop it. It's rolling right now." -- Sunday Times, May 2015
The contemplation of the relentless march of time is a favorite philosophical chestnut. Here Jenner displays an innate understanding of the unstoppable flow of time and life towards its inevitable terminus, an awareness of an ending akin to the "death consciousness" expressed by Sartre. Jenner is keenly alert to the fact that all things must move forward, and that death comes for us all, even as her youthful self will live forever in KUWTK reruns. In order to embrace high-level Kendall-thinking, you must embrace the fact that time is not a flat circle, but an ever-flowing stream.
Kendallism 404: Abnormal is the New Normal
"It's really weird. I understand that it's not normal...But it is normal." -- GQ, May 2015
Progressing in your understanding of the Jenner philosophy means possessing the ability to possess two seemingly opposed concepts in your mind at the same time. Jenner admits that her life hasn't been average by any definition. Simultaneously, she will tell you that the life of intense fame and scrutiny, of tabloid coverage and constant scrutiny, is utterly normal. Two concepts, diametrically opposed, living in harmony.
Kendallism 501: Everything Is Real
"'It's completely me,' she says, about the person you see on television. 'I don't know how I'd have to play a character.'" -- GQ, May 2015
The final stage to achieving true transcendence under Kendallism is to believe that all you present to the world is truth. Here Jenner taps into the age-old metaphysical debate about identity, particularly Leibniz's belief that so long as two things share the precise same properties, they are the same. Even if your desire not to have TV cameras follow you while working on fashion shows might imply that you're trying to carve out a different, more private persona, you must also remember that you are, at the same time, entirely "Kendall Jenner, reality TV star."