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Kool A.D. Forecasts Your October Horoscopes

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horoscopes copy.jpgLIBRA
The difference between the self and the other is essentially negligible in the cosmic scheme of things. The world unfurls itself into ur eyeballs, ear holes, etc. and resides within u. The ears and eyes are really just for show, extraneous ornaments. Everything u see and hear (and everything u don't) is and always was and always will be u. A human body is a temporary manifestation of the infinite universe perceiving itself in one novel, subjective way. Expect nothing, desire nothing, quiet the ego and just be. Joy will well up from within. True existence is pure joy. 

SCORPIO
Death is an illusion but the difference between illusion and reality is illusory so death is also real. Meditate on the reality of death. With great swag comes great funkability. If the pimpin is real then the funk is real. Endless pimpin equals endless funk, it's simple mathematics. Love and forgive everybody, including urself. Patience naturally sharpens with age, meditate on that with regular breaths. Allow any lingering impatience within u to implode and dissolve. Ask for forgiveness for all of ur wrongdoings but don't expect to receive it in this lifetime. 

SAGITARIUS 
Embrace ur inner wave god. Privacy is a myth. Walk thru the world as if everybody is psychic and infinitely compassionate, including urself. Communicate with an ex lover in ur dreams. Smoke weed with a Scorpio. Plant some sage. 

GEMINI
That Super Blood Moon last month really cleared the air for u. U did some kharmic burning and some ego reshaping. Ur in a new phase, u should be feeling productive, creative, refreshed, invigorated. Eat a lot of protein and iron. More raw fruits and vegetables, less dairy. Ur hecka skrong rn, thaswasup. U should be listening to a lot of Mariah Carey, Michael Jackson and Janet Jackson. Listen to All Eyez On Me and watch Mike Tyson knock out compilations on YouTube. Read bell hooks, Nikki Giovani and Audre Lorde. Watch that architecture documentary narrated by Ice Cube. Study the Annunaki. Listen to Everything is Everything by Lauryn Hill. Or whatever, recorded music is fun but ultimately unimportant. Every song ever written is already playing on loop in ur heart. Focus on ur breathing and posture. Ur keyword for the month is "unflappable." 

PISCES
Have a long conversation with ur mom. The conversation can occur on the earthly plane or the astral one. Reflect on ur blessings and be thankful. Better than guilt or regret is compassionate action. Better than sadness or anger is the will to change. Kick it in a sauna. 

ARIES 
Have dinner with a Scorpio, Gemini and/or Libra. Ur deliberate in ur actions and that's crucial right now. Stay on course and be patient. Keep ur eyes open, there should be some yaperistic opportunities springing up here and there. There are universes within u and universes that stretch out eternally from u. Each breath u draw contains a multitude of possible realities. It's easy to get overwhelmed with the concept of infinity but if u take the right angle, the concept of infinity is very relaxing and reassuring. Listen to John Coltrane and Alice Coltrane. 

LEO
Quit ur job and work four times as hard on ur own project. Limit ur extraneous desires and focus instead on what it is u really want. Zero in on the prize and eliminate the distractions. Spend free time either working on what u love or being with loved ones. Cut off any casual or obligatory friendships. U don't have time for that right now. Cut out the noise. Nose to the grindstone, silence, breathing, sweet harmony. 

VIRGO
What a Time to Be Alive was what everybody was talking about last month but go back to Dirty Sprite 2 with new ears and hear it for the classic album it is. Light a San Lazaro candle and pray for Fetty Wap's leg bones to heal. Buy, pick, or steal a bouquet of flowers for somebody u love. Take a Vicodin and watch Interview With a Vampire. 

CANCER
Read The Great Gatsby then watch The Great Gatsby and take a shot of gin for every discrepancy between the book and the movie that u notice. Swim in the ocean or at least take a dip. Get some pumpkin spice flavored ice cream. I don't understand memes that are like "White people love pumpkin spice flavor." Who cares, talk about real estate redlining, racially disproportionate incarceration, police brutality, etc. Kill George Zimmerman, who gives a fuck about pumpkin spice. 

AQUARIUS
Tranquility is at the root of all things. Dig to ur root and find tranquility. Do what u must when u must. Do what u want when u can. Peace is a state of existence but maybe more importantly it's a feeling. U can be surrounded by energy that is not peaceful and yet still find peace within. And that peace can work to change the space around u. Love, forgiveness and patience heal all wounds and contribute to all successes. 

TAURUS
Communicate psychically with a Gemini and an Aries in the dream plane. Learn from them and teach them. All instruction is learning and vice versa. Female energy is surging globally right now, walk with that knowledge. U are ascending. Go on at least 4 dates with a Libra this month. Or just one if 4 seems O.D. but it's probably not. 

CAPRICORN
More weed than drink this month. More fruits and vegetables, less meat and dairy. Take at least one long walk a week. Ur soundtrack is Dead Prez, Black Star, early Common, Living Legends, People Under the Stairs and Equipto. Aside from that, hella Bob Marley. Be in nature. Kick it with family. Buy a water purifier and drink hella water. Go to a shooting range and fire off at least 100 rounds. Focus on aim in all respects.


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