Top Ten Twitterbots You Should Be Following

After @horse_ebooks was revealed to be human way back in 2013 we had a lot of questions, mainly: could any Twitterbot fill the horse-shaped hole in our hearts that was left behind? Maybe not, but it's always good to try! So here are our suggestions for ten Twitterbots to follow to make your feed a little less boring and a little more weird.

1. @RedScareBot

I see red people RT @dhz26 Just used the phrase "day-dreaming, European socialist, marijuana-smoking liberals"

-- Robot J. McCarthy (@RedScareBot) December 10, 2014

In the spirit of Joseph McCarthy this bot will respond to tweets that seem suspiciously communist. It's like following your grandfather who's suspicious of liberal politics, but without any of the weird family dynamics to worry about.

2. @CyberEveryword

ＣＹＢＥＲＣＲＥＭＡＴＯＲＩＵＭ

-- ＣＹＢＥＲＥＶＥＲＹＷＯＲＤ (@CyberEveryword) December 9, 2014

A play on the now defunct @everyword Twitter account, this account is in the midst of tweeting every word in the dictionary with the word "C Y B E R" in front of it. And it's only in the C's so we have a long time to enjoy this account (also a shoutout to @ghost_things, @everypunk and @everywordisgay for following a similar pattern -- they're in our hearts, too).

3. @JustToSayBot

I have blundered the blends that were in the prairie Forgive me They were purposeless so and and so swank

-- This Is Just to Say (@JustToSayBot) December 10, 2014

This bot tweets out nonsense in the form of William Carlos William's poem "This Is Just To Say."

4. @nice_tips_bot

hey, remember: be confident.

-- hi i have advice (@nice_tips_bot) December 10, 2014

Every once in a while the world gets overwhelming and you just need some simple advice from a computer. There's tips about ice skating, finding out if someone is cheating on you, and just general life advice tweeted out daily. It's like a little burst of sunshine when your time line is getting dark.

5. @congressedits

Senate Intelligence Committee report on CIA torture Wikipedia article edited anonymously from US Senate http://t.co/gCbKRlBvdw

-- congress-edits (@congressedits) December 10, 2014

Have you ever wanted to know what people in Congress do in their free time? Apparently, they edit Wikipedia articles. This bot tweets every edit to any Wikipedia article from IP addresses in the US Congress. The results swing between charming and terrifying.

6. @onlymanthings

I don't overreach, I BROverreach.

-- men only (@onlymanthings) December 10, 2014

This bot needs way more love. @onlymanthings tweets out puns you'd expect your token bro friend to make when his masculinity is threatened. It's a beautiful, beautiful thing.

7. @TheAverageShark

Swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim

-- The Average Shark (@TheAverageShark) November 30, 2014

While this Twitter account isn't as active as most of the others on this list, the sporadic updates of this shark are a masterpiece. Yes, it is exactly what it sounds like: an average shark doing average shark things.

8. @pentametron

"I am a messy, messy, messy mess."

-- Drunk (@stylinsonlovee) December 10, 2014

Dreams can reveal the feelings you suppress

-- Evan Almighty (@IRREL_EVAN_T) December 10, 2014

This bot doesn't create tweets, but instead retweets them. It's programmed to retweet two random, rhyming, iambic pentameter following tweets next to each other. Their timeline is basically an extended and postmodern poem.

9. @altalien_txt

I was approached 20 years ago by a government agency representative proposing psychic experiments to stop the heart of a pig. ☝7/3/98

-- alt.alien_txt (@altalien_txt) December 8, 2014

While at first glance this account looks like random phrases, it's actually the ramblings of people who posted on alien forums on the early web. What could be more beautiful than the musings of conspiracy nerds in the late 90's and early 2000's?

10. @wikisext
 

sext: i pick out my priorities while you softly realize that indecisiveness is also my decision

-- how 2 sext (@wikisext) December 8, 2014

@wikisext is probably one of the most coherent bots you can possibly stumble upon. Merging the popular faux-sexting tweet format and Wikihow articles, it creates weirdly poetic, endearing and sometimes genuinely touching tweets.