Let it be known that we have a particular distaste for writing year-end music lists, but we love to read them! Here are our picks for the top 10 year-end music lists of 2013, ranked in descending order...
10) The Onion AV Club
Fall Out Boy and Paramore landed on this list. AV Club is the new TRL?
No. 1: Yeezus by Kanye West
Where Yeezus charted: SEE ABOVE
9) Time magazine
If you're reading Time magazine's Top 10 albums of 2013, it's probably because someone's great-grandpa left it in your seat-back pocket on a Southwest Airlines flight.
No. 1: Yeezus by Kanye West
Where Yeezus charted: SEE ABOVE
8) Rolling Stone
This list's top 10 includes John Fogerty's new LP, where he covers his own songs with Kid Rock and Foo Fighters. Rolling Stone should start publishing on an ancient weather beaten scroll.
No. 1: Modern Vampires of the City by Vampire Weekend
Where Yeezus charted: No. 2
7) Pitchfork
Pitchfork, the champion of cutting-edge avant garde artists, has the same top two as Rolling Stone, which is Bob Seger's favorite magazine. Major fail. Totally stale.
No. 1: Modern Vampires of the City by Vampire Weekend
Where Yeezus charted: No. 2
6) NME
If you said, "For $1 million, what's NME No. 1 album of 2013?" I would say, "Did Blur or Oasis put out an album this year?" And you'd say, "No." Then I'd say, "Arctic Monkeys." And you'd have to pay me a million bucks.
No. 1: AM by Arctic Monkeys
Where Yeezus charted: No. 2
5) Vibe
Vibe scores points for including Ciara, PAPER's September cover girl, on their list.
No. 1: Nothing Was the Same by Drake
Where Yeezus charted: No. 3
4) NPR
They snubbed David Sedaris' Let's Talk About Diabetes With Owls audiobook!
No. 1: Albums aren't ranked
Where Yeezus charted: It's on the list.
3) SPIN
I was expecting My Bloody Valentine to chart higher in this '90s relic, but they landed at No. 39.
No. 1: Yeezus by Kanye West
Where Yeezus charted: SEE ABOVE
2) Stereogum
Yes, Stereogum's comments section is the third-worst burning wasteland of hatred (behind Brooklyn Vegan and Gothamist, respectively), but they show love to the right artists on their list.
No. 1: Yeezus by Kanye West
Where Yeezus charted: SEE ABOVE
1) Metro New York
I picked up a copy of this free NYC newspaper, distributed in subway stations, on my seat on the M train a couple days ago. I glanced at it and thought, THIS IS THE PERFECT 2013 LIST. It includes Kanye, Vampire Weekend, Lorde, Miley, and most importantly, Beyonce, in their top 5. What else do you need?
No. 1: Yeezus by Kanye West
Where Yeezus charted: SEE ABOVE