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Thunder Road: Male Stripper Tropes X Classic Stripper Jams

Screen Shot 2013-08-02 at 4.50.52 PM.png Hesta Prynn A.jpgIn this weekly column, MC/DJ Hesta Prynn pairs pop culture stories with an original playlist.

I may or may not be writing from a bachelorette party in Vegas. The sun may or may not be melting my computer, the Piña Coladas may or may not be flowing and later tonight I may or may not find myself shielding my eyes from the "severe weather event" otherwise known as the Thunder from Down Under. In honor of one of my BFFs tying the knot, this week's Five 'n' Five pairs classic stripper tropes with some out of the box stripper songs. Based on real life research (and Ginuwine "Pony" aside), here are my personal faves -- try them at home!

1. This Policeman Gonna LOCK YOU UP GIRL! -- "All I Want Is You" by Miguel feat. J Cole

Kind of less sexy since I started watching Orange is the New Black (see last week's column) but nearly everyone interested in men loves one in uniform. See also: Navy Seal, SWAT team member.

2. This Fire(man) is Out of Control -- "2getha Baby" by Ghostface Killah

You will be hard pressed to find an all-male revue not taking advantage of the obligatory props that come along with this one. Watch out ladies, he's turning on the hose! See also: construction worker, "YMCA."

3. The Pizza Delivery Guy Who's Delivering More Than Pizza -- "Dazed and Confused" by Led/Lez Zeppelin.

Did someone order a sausage pie? See also: maintenance man, plumber, pool boy.

4. Businessman Going to WORK! -- "Bad Girl" by Usher

My man makes so much money but gets so stressed after a day of work. Why this one is hot I'll never know. They say every man looks good in a suit? See also: doctor, professional athlete, Brad Pitt.

5. Save a Horse Ride a Cowboy -- "Love" by Matt White

A sensitive cowboy? You mean he'll wrangle the cattle, protect us from bandits and rub my feet? This one deserves a proper love song! See also: pirate, Game of Thrones.

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