As I watched a press screening of Harmony Korine's new film Spring Breakers a few months back, I wondered two things: One, would Selena Gomez's teen witch predecessor Melissa Joan Hart have been more successful if she'd had an on-and-off relationship with a member of N' Sync? And two, are these girls (Gomez, Vanessa Hudgens, Rachel Korine and Ashley Benson) ever going to wash their faces and reapply mascara? The latter gave me a flashback to Acapulco, Mexico and the small hotel room in the Copacabana Hotel where my fellow State school Spring Breakers and I would transform from our pool-party day look (waterproof mascara, wet, salty hair, tanning oil and bikinis) to our ready-to-do-tequila-slammers-at-the-Palladium-Club night look (straightened hair, backless shirts and platform sandals). Now don't get me wrong: when you've spent the day drinking Bacardi Limón out of a 2-liter bottle of Squirt in the hotel pool you're probably not going to be too motivated to get a shower and get your "club look" together. But girls -- that's half the fun! After a few Piña Coladas and Modelos, you're willing to take makeup risks you wouldn't have the courage to take back on campus and your prep time is mysteriously cut in half. (That, or Captain Morgan makes two hours feels like 20 minutes.)
Either way, everyone wins: you, the prince charming you spot stumbling toward you in the strobe lights, and the person who wakes up next to you in the early afternoon. So to all you co-eds out there who are packing up your beer bongs and bikinis, here are some tips to remember when you're getting ready to go out to the club as my old ass is getting into bed.
1. Bronzer is a must!
Don't you want to play up that great tan you got when you
2. Don't wash your hair.
If you haven't gone under the water, don't wash your hair! The sexy, beachy look is in and if you want to add a few curls while you wait for your five friends to cycle in and out of the shower, than your salt-air hair will hold it that much better!
3. Keep drinking.
Taking a break from the bottle to get ready is a day drinking rookie's mistake. You could end up passed out at 8pm on the cum-stained hotel bed and made a mockery of when your friends return late night to continue the party. Make sure that a friend is doing her makeup in the bathroom while you're taking a shower so that she is always available to hand you your cocktail.
4. Have fun.
You know that bright yellow Make Up For Ever eyeshadow that you've been trying to work in to your look? Well, now's the time! It'll go great with your tan and everyone will be too drunk to notice if it doesn't.
5. Keep your mouth moist.
Most of what you do with your mouth on Spring Break is your business, but just make sure you keep those lips hydrated! I don't recommend wearing a heavy lipstick as it will get smeared when you're doing body shots. But you should stuff a light, shimmery Pacifica Color Quench Lip Tint in your bra with your ID and credit card.