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What Happens When Sex and the City Gets the Josh Schwartz/Stephanie Savage Treatment?

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With news today that CW is officially moving forward with The Carrie Diaries -- Candace Bushnell's prequel to Sex and the City -- and that The O.C. and Gossip Girl's Josh Schwartz and Stephanie Savage would be behind it, we decided to imagine what a young Carrie, Miranda, Samantha and Charlotte would be like after receiving the Schwartz/Savage treatment. The producing pair have famously been able to direct the zeitgeist with their shows (regardless of their actual ratings) -- didn't you feel like Orange County and L.A. were the centers of the universe in the mid-aughts, particularly with the eventual proliferation of all of those reality series (Laguna Beach, The Hills, Real Housewives of Orange County)? And, in the later aughts, when the duo set their sights on New York, it seemed that just like a 21st Century version of the Sun King, we all followed their gaze and focused on The Big Apple (Real Housewives of New York and New Jersey quickly eclipsed their OC counterpart and NYC Prep and The City also came on the airwaves).

After years of closely watching Gossip Girl and The O.C., it's become apparent that Schwartz and Savage have their favorite archetypes. By now, fans of both series can recognize several parallels: Summer Roberts, the carefree, wealthy It Girl who dated a less popular boy (Seth Cohen) is a perfect match for another carefree, wealthy It Girl who dated a less popular boy, Serena van der Woodsen (despite the fact that when GG premiered, critics wanted to peg blonde Serena as the new, blonder Marissa Cooper)  With time it became obvious that Marissa's better counterpart was Blair, another rich girl with skeletons in her familial closet who also possesses a darker side behind those glossy tresses.  From that point on, the rest is more straightforward: Seth Cohen = Dan Humphrey, Sandy Cohen = Rufus Humphrey, Vanessa Abrams = Anna Stern and Julie Cooper = Lily van der Woodsen.

This time around, however, Schwartz and Savage are taking on a project associated with characters already fully formed (though depending on how closely the two follow Bushnell's text, we'll probably see a whole hell of a lot of new characters from Carrie's teenage years).  That said, we're making our predictions anyway about which Schwartz/Savage archetypes (or combinations thereof) the young SATC ladies will come to resemble.


CARRIE.pngSummer Roberts + Serena van der Woodsen + Vanessa Abrams =



Carrie-Sex-And-The-City.jpgCarrie Bradshaw

Carrie has the flightiness and "It Girl-ness" of Summer and Serena (she worked at Vogue and was always getting the hook-ups to those fabulous parties, after all) but her mix-and-match downtown style is more like that of Vanessa. Despite her flakiness, Carrie's also pretty cerebral (and neurotic), which seems to be a trait belonging to the sensitive Vanessa more so than either Serena or Summer.

Bonus points: The Providence, RI native Schwartz seems to have a thing for Brown University. Summer attended the school, Serena got in (but ditched it to stay in NYC) and Bushnell's book also has Carrie accepted into the Ivy League institution.



SAMANTHA.pngMarissa Cooper + Serena van der Woodsen =



Samantha-Sex-and-the-city-2.jpgSamantha Jones

Okay, so Marissa Cooper seems a lot more unhinged than Samantha but she is the daughter of Julie Cooper, whose voraciousness and cougar tendencies mimic those of Ms. Jones; perhaps this is a case of the proverbial apple not falling far from the tree.  Marissa also shares some of Samantha's "trisexual" appetites (both women had lesbian relationships at one point amidst a slew of other ill-suited hunks). Serena, meanwhile, possesses the kind of confidence we imagine a young Samantha Jones might have in addition to an uncanny knack for getting attention.

Bonus points: If we were to flip-flop this equation, we can imagine a grown-up Serena or Marissa (if she lived) going into PR.


MIRANDA.pngSeth Cohen + Blair Waldorf =


d3870i82933h131425.jpgMiranda Hobbes

Before you get mad that we associated the famously frumpy (until the SATC movies, that is!) Miranda with a dude, remember that both Miranda and Seth share a quick wit and a love of sarcasm. In their respective shows they could always be counted on to make a cynical barb in response to anything silly coming out of the mouths of one of their head-in-the-clouds friends (or love interests for that matter). As for the Blair-Miranda pairing, both ladies are incredibly ambitious Type As (though Miranda's non-Upper East Side roots -- earlier SATC episodes said she was from Philly -- mean she doesn't have any of Blair's stereotypical prep school spoiledness).

Bonus points: All three characters like to be in control and hide their vulnerabilities (especially with romantic partners). In some cases they do this with humor (Miranda and Seth) or iciness (Miranda and Blair).



CHARLOTTE.pngSummer Roberts + Blair Waldorf =


Charlotte-Now.jpgCharlotte York

Besides the obvious brunette-ness of all these ladies, they share more in common than a colorist. Charlotte has much of the same perpetual cheeriness as Summer combined with Blair's love of fantasy (particularly if they involve Prince Charming types and weddings).  Additionally, their WASP-y pedigrees and uptown style (okay folks in Orange County wore Uggs and Sevens in the mid-2000s but you get the point) translate into all of them being a little spoiled and sometimes endearingly out of touch.

Bonus points: For all their WASPiness, both Charlotte and Summer ended up marrying Jews.  As for Blair?  Her future remains to be written -- Schwartz we're looking at you to make sure she ends up with a nice Jewish boy.



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