Friday Superlatives: The Best, Worst and Weirdest of the Week

Craziest Thing We Saw at a Party This Week: These two (nearly) naked body-painted girls at the Dos Equis Academy Party at a Masonic Lodge in Chelsea. -- Abby Schreiber

Best Food Reading: As a lifelong Chinatown resident, I was thrilled at the arrival of Lucky Peach's Chinatown issue. I plan on flaunting my newfound knowledge of dim sum with friends this weekend. -- Jonah Wolf

Best Couple That Makes Us Feel Disgusting : Olivier Sarkozy and Mary Kate Olsen. -- Elizabeth Thompson

Biggest Broadway Disappointment Of the Week: The very funny and entertaining new play, The Performers, starring Alicia Silverstone, Cheyenne Jackson, Ari Graynor and Henry "The Fonz" Winkler is closing after only 7 performances on Sunday. Go see it before Sunday! -- Whitney Spaner 

Best Example of Making the Super-Confusing Petraeus Sex Scandal Less Confusing: "How Mean Girls Explains the Petraeus Scandal" by Ann Friedman for The Cut -- AS

Best Portrait Of An artist By Another Artist: "Portrait of Chris," 2012, a portrait of Chris Johanson by Barry McGee. -- ET

Best Drunk Read: I love Negronis, and I love Troy Patterson, so I knew even before I read it that I would love Patterson's "North Brooklyn Negroni Crawl." -- JW

Best Snack Discovery We Made This Week: That Gregory's Coffee on 31st and Sixth (and, presumably their other locations) has free doughnut holes that are actually really, really good (especially when you want something sweet but don't want to succumb to temptation and buy that apple fritter staring you in the face). -- AS

Best Office Find: This Hugh Grant Commemorative Plate. (Runners up HERE and HERE.) -- JW
Best Fake Invention We Wish Were Real: The bedazzled chicken nugget "Dipping Station" as seen on Hollywood Nailz. -- AS


Weirdest Twerk Video We Watched All Week: Lady Gaga and Terry Richardson's bizarre teaser for the singer's forthcoming music video accompanying new trap single, "Cake." -- AS

And the award for the 'Most Scathingly Bitchy, Pointlessly Cruel, Needless Takedown of Someone We Already Know Is the Worst and Also The Man Who Keeps the At-Home Blood Sugar Testing Kits Business Booming': Pete Wells' Review of Guy Fieri's Diarrhea Emporium American Kitchen and Bar in Times Square.