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Wax Idols' Hether Fortune Talks Taylor Swift, Industry Sexism and Her New Album

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photos by Dustin Senovic


Wax Idols frontwoman Hether Fortune is equally as well known for her outspoken socio-political beliefs as her foggy, new wave sound, so it's no surprise that our interview is just as passionate. Speaking to her on the phone about the forthcoming and intensely personal album American Tragic, which was worked on by only three people -- drummer Rachel Travers, producer Monte Vallier and Fortune herself -- we also touched on broader topics relating to the likes of Taylor Swift, Twitter and internalized sexism in music. Read the entire Q&A below.

It feels like a big theme of the record is empathy. American Tragic does kind of give off the sense that it's not here for those who take advantage of vulnerable people and communities. 

I wouldn't say it's the overall theme of the whole record, but there are a couple songs that are reactive to my own personal experiences throughout the past few years: going through a divorce, having people take advantage of me when I was down, stuff like that. [Empathy is] part of the package of going through a traumatic emotional experience, but it's not the overt message of the album across the board.  

I know that you also just did an interview about internalized sexism in music. You mentioned briefly about grappling with that yourself. Was there a definitive moment where you recognized it? 

I wish there was a definitive moment, one clear-cut example that was easy to explain. But it's really just a lifetime of lived experiences and over time realizing what was going on and learning not to blame myself. It was learning not to compete with other women and people I was being pitted against who were being affected in similar ways. One of the first things I can remember that made me realize "I'm going to be treated differently because I have this body or this way of presenting my gender" was when I was 15...when I went to a summer camp for audio production. It was the first day and I was the only girl in the class, and straight-up one of the boys looked up and said, "What are you doing here?" and everybody started laughing...And there are a lot of things that have happened since then to reinforce that. I've been fortunate enough to have strong personal strength and willpower from my mother, so I've never let it break me down or stop me from doing what I want to do, but I do sometimes feel surprised by it. It's hard. 

I'm sure you saw Jessica Hopper's call for tweets then -- about first brushes with misogyny and feeling like you don't "belong" in the industry?

I was sobbing reading all of those, I was overwhelmed. 

It's heartbreaking.

I've almost become numb to it. I've been forced to laugh it off or ignore it...and people continue to reinforce that, even in my social circle. There's a lot of backlash happening even within the punk community with expressing that [misogyny] is a problem for some of us. There are times when I've internalized that, but when it comes at you over and over again after years and years it's hard not to feel bad about it.

What are the state of affairs in punk music right now? What still needs to be worked on? 

More compassion. I'm not personally in a frame of mind where I'm on this sweeping tidal wave that's happening right now where people are demanding more safe spaces or [participating in] "call-out culture," and I have conflicting views about it. First of all, I think it's important to be transparent and to be aware and take care of each other, but I also recognize that a big part of this punk and hardcore subculture is violence and chaos and expressing anger in a way that those should be safe spaces for people who are angry. They need to let that out and be able to push, shove, scream, sweat and freak out because they're holding onto so much emotion. That was my experience growing up in the hardcore scene, and that's what I sought out. Like I wanted to feel the camaraderie of a group of people losing their shit. I think that's really important about punk and I don't want that to go away. But I do think the scene should have more compassion and empathy for people who are drawn to those subcultures for different reasons. Maybe they have different types of traumas, personality sets, or mental issues where it's more difficult for them to exist in those spaces and feel comfortable. Having compassion rather than judgment and criticism would make the biggest difference.

There is something to be said about "call-out culture" in regards to that. It's been a big issue as of late with band names being watched by the "social justice warriors" and whatnot. Do you have an opinion on that issue? 

Not really. There are so many serious, real problems happening in the world all the time. 2015 is a little past the age to be like "Oh, I'm gonna wear a Nazi symbol!" It's like, okay, they did that in the '70s, we get it. Let's find another way to subvert culture and freak people out. Personally, I don't offend easily, but I understand why other people get offended. But it's important to talk about, and I like to fully explore discourse. I would say punk's biggest crime would be being ignorant or boring -- like it's not that interesting to name your band [something controversial]. Most of the times it's just kids trying to be wild and make music and they're not the most cultured and informed people in the world. Like a huge part of the punk subculture has to do with class and maybe they don't understand what would be offensive to a variety of people. But it's a dangerous line. We have to value and respect each other and cultural differences. 

Is that why you're also a pretty prominent writer? To encourage discourse? 

I don't think that's why I'm a writer. I started writing when I was really young, and I mostly wrote poetry and fiction. Writing for me is primarily a way for me to work out stuff that goes on in my head. I'm comfortable being opinionated, and it works as a tool for me to get feelings across and try and make a difference for somebody, even if it's just someone identifying with what I'm saying. 

Do you see your writing and music working in tandem towards advancing what you're saying, or is it more that they inform each other? 

Honestly, I've never really thought about it. I've always had an overwhelming need to express myself with whatever medium is available to me. I just have a lot in me that I want to share so I can work through things energetically, emotionally, and intellectually. Being creative is part of my learning process. 

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I saw your VMA tweets. What are your opinions on Taylor Swift's very controversial "girl squad?" 

I think it's totally phony, I don't buy it. It's all for show. I think she's a super talented artist and songwriter, obviously. She's self-made in a lot of ways and she's in control of her own career, so I respect those things about her. But I think that she's so far off the planet... She's on Planet Taylor where everything revolves around her. Suddenly now she's like, "Oh, feminism is cool! This is my girl squad!" Which is, for the most part, supermodels and really beautiful, thin, women who make her look like she's cool. It's just ridiculous, but that is her job as a performer. Do your thing, whatever makes you happy, but I personally don't find it empowering or genuine. She's acting like she's making some grand political statement, but it's a daily reality to have friends that are women. I'm not inspired. 

Nicki had a point, and I can't believe it was totally erased. 

She totally had a point! And then Taylor just came in on her white horse, like her literal white horse, and completely dominated the discussion Nicki was trying to have about a real issue she deals with as a black woman in the industry. I wanted to hear what Nicki had to say, I didn't want to hear what Taylor had to say. Why is she involved in that? It had nothing to do with her, but she had to insert herself. 

What are your opinions on the commercialization of feminism that's been floating around as of late? 

It's a catch-22. That's happening with feminism and that's happening with trans-visibility. I can't speak on [trans issues] and I won't speak on that, but feminism is something I can claim and do claim. It's complicated because on the one hand it's good. The more the idea of feminism becomes normalized and accepted as not a scary thing, but as something about equality -- it can only help. But I also can't help but have a vomit-reaction to it being so oddly and clearly commercialized. Like, at the end of the day, the people who are in power at the top-tier of the industry are still men in suits at all these record companies. They're still calling the shots and making the money. It's mostly still old dudes. Feminism is being taken and presented back to us as a product, and it sucks. These men in power are being forced to acknowledge feminism, but they're using it to make more money because they see that women like it. 

I think this ties back to the whole idea of your album, American Tragic. Could you explain what 'American Tragic' means? 

Thematically, I called it American Tragic because it ties together how I live in this society and culture as an opinionated and socio-politically informed person, which informs everything that I do. And even though the album is very personal and emotional for me, it's a universal theme of feeling broken, abandoned, weak, and invisible. Especially with what's been happening with this major cultural upheaval surrounding social media and Black Lives Matter and trans women being murdered. There's all this awareness and change happening, but there's a huge push against that at the same time. It feels like an energetic war that's always been waging in this country, because it's always been a dichotomy in America: the land of promise, the land of slavery. It's a land of beginnings, and a land of an entire native peoples being slaughtered. It's a land of immense wealth and immense poverty. It's such a huge dichotomy of extremes. That's how I feel every day of my life, like I should be so grateful but I'm also so sad.

Relive Our First Episode of PAPER Radio with the Rhodes Brothers and Kris Jenner

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This morning, we had the pleasure of losing our radio virginity with the first installment of the new PAPER Radio show on Andy Cohen's SiriusXM network, featuring some major guests. On this episode, we caught up with YouTube superstars The Rhodes Brothers and the matriarch of the Kardashian Klan, the one and only Kris Jenner. 

We kicked off the show with an intimate chat with Austin and Aaron Rhodes, who were featured in our September issue. We spoke to the twins about their viral coming out video, how to deal with having boys over while sharing the same bed, and their roles on Ryan Murphy's new show Scream Queens

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We ended the show with an amazing interview with Kris Jenner. First, Mr. Mickey gave Kris a lesson on all the new dating apps, even teaching her how to use Grindr -- and we learned a little about the history of her love life (as well as the man she's seeing now).


Then, Kris talked to us about the emotional first time she met Catilyn Jenner after her ex's full transition, with Kim there for support. It must have been a stressful experience, but Kris' account is moving, and the small details (like complimenting Caitlyn on her eyebrows) help paint an even more complex picture of this time in the family's life. Tune in next week for more exciting interviews!

The 10 Young Designer Shows We're Most Excited For at LFW

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Change is afoot at London Fashion Week, with the British Fashion Council show space moving from its iconic Somerset House venue to Brewer Street Car Park in Soho. The schedule has also been given a shake-up, with a host of new designers and presentations on the schedule. Here, we pick ten of our favorite designers/shows to watch.

Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 2.58.19 PM.pngMolly Goddard
Now in her third season, Goddard has built a cult following for her whimsical taffeta gowns, handcrafted prom dresses and super sweet candy ruffles. Delve through the tulle layers though and Goddard's teen dream remix packs attitude, as does her girl gang of supporters which includes Björk, Phoebe Collings-James and sister Alice Goddard, as well as Dover Street Market, who snapped up her most recent collection. Last season, she threw a naked art model into the mix, so we're curious to see what theatrics are in store for her first on-schedule presentation.

Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 3.02.42 PM.pngLe Kilt
Samantha McCoach's punked-up modern interpretation of the Scottish classic references British subcultures and the '80s club scene. The name itself is so-called after the legendary Soho Club -- a Blitz Kids hangout lined with tartan wallpaper. The Scottish designer, who previously cut her teeth at Fred Perry, manages to walk a fine line, which sits somewhere between your grandmother's closet and punk anarchy, blending patchwork plaids, neon hues and handcrafted classic silhouettes.

Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 3.05.05 PM.pngSadie Williams
Since graduating from Central Saint Martin's in 2013, Sadie Williams has built a reputation for her innovative approach to textiles, splicing chevron stripes, pop colors and metallic foil prints with lashings of Lurex. Think raglan sleeves, glitter applique and Pierre Cardin Space Age references and you're halfway there. Now in her second season at LFW, William's presentation promises craft-heavy minimalism and retro sportswear references.

Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 3.06.41 PM.pngA Design by Richard Malone

Fashion East
Fashion East has long been heralded a melting pot of emerging talent and this year is no exception, with a stellar line-up including Richard Malone and This Is The Uniform, alongside returning designer Caitlin Price. Malone, who was awarded the prestigious LVMH Scholarship last year, is known for his distinct padded silhouettes, gingham prints and retro stripes, inspired by his heritage and upbringing in rural Ireland.
 
Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 3.08.11 PM.pngMarta Jakubowski  
Marta Jakubowski's block color collections champion nineties minimalism and androgynous tailoring. With a CV that reels off Jonathan Saunders, Hussein Chalayan and Alexander Wang, she is noted for her fabric-heavy stark silhouettes and surrealist touch. Her masculine collections are underpinned by a lingering sex appeal, achieved through unexpected skirt slits, and exposed skin.
 
Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 3.10.58 PM.pngFaustine Steinmetz
Returning to fashion week with a prestigious LVMH string to her bow, Faustine Steinmetz is known for her laboriously hand-woven, rugged denim and inventive fabric manipulation (last season, she coated her jeans in silicone). The Parisian-born designer works with sustainable fabrics and recycled yarn to create her intricate denim-led collections, always placed within an equally intriguing installation space.
 
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Danielle Romeril
Craftsmanship sits at the helm of Danielle Romeril's collections, which encompass an otherworldly take on elegance crafted from plaid, plastic, lace and leather. The devil is in the details for the Irish designer; look out for intricate fringing, slouchy pockets and subtle prints across skirts, dresses and T-shirts, as romance and rebellion collide.
 
Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 3.14.15 PM.png1205
1205 is London's most coveted cult label, founded by Paula Gerbase in 2010. The brand champions low-key, high-quality classic cuts, rooted in old school Savile Row discipline, where the designer trained for many years at Hardy Amies. Signature pieces include pleated wool trousers, crisp shirts and marl dresses, in a neutral color palette of white, grey and navy, and acts as a moment of welcome calm amidst the chaos of Fashion Week.

Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 3.18.08 PM.pngEmma Hill

Hill & Friends
The greatest heavyweight on this list perhaps, fashion is no stranger to Emma Hill, former creative director for Mulberry, credited for giving the brand IT girl status, and changing its clientele forevermore. Her new venture is a collaboration with Georgia Fendley, former brand director for Mulberry, and looks set to harness a similar distinctly British, Made in England vibe, putting the fun in function like only Hill knows how.
 
Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 3.16.19 PM.pngHelen Lawrence
Knitwear designer Helen Lawrence was plucked by Lulu Kennedy in 2014 to join the ranks at Fashion East. Showing off-schedule this season, she will continue her exploration into inventive and unconventional knitwear methods, with past collections boasting pop candy color palettes, deconstructed patterns and a rich tapestry of textures. She has previously worked with Alexander McQueen and Mark Fast, as well as good friend Craig Green. 


"I'm Probably The Most Important Writer Living Today": Meet Tech Erotica Author Leonard Delaney, Author Of "Conquered By Clippy"

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Leonard Delaney is a thirty-something professional writer based in Ontario, Canada, who just happens to also pen tech-centric erotica "by cover of night." Titilating titles from his Digital Desires series that he's become semi-Internet famous for include the likes of Invaded by the iWatch, Taken By The Tetris Blocks and, of course, Conquered by Clippy, which all, obviously, revolve around the premise of one redheaded, strikingly grey-eyed vixen named Christie Aackerlund who just really, really loves technology.

As such, we decided to email Delaney a few questions about his nighttime hobby, what inspired it and what gaps (lol) he's filling in the techno-fetishist market -- but, to be honest, it was mostly so we could get free copies of an ebook about an Apple product with a boner. Check out our Q&A below.

How'd you start writing? Why settle on erotic tech short stories? 

I've been writing since I could pick up a pen. I remember writing fan-fiction for obscure horror movies when I was, like, 12. I've written a bit of every genre, but self-publishing really opened the door to writing things that don't neatly fit into a genre. I could write this fucked up, slightly shitty stuff, put it up on Amazon, and see if people actually liked it. Some people got what I was doing with the erotic short stories and liked it, so I kept rolling with it.

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Illustration by Dan Meth via Buzzfeed.

Why technological objects? Did you intentionally market this toward techno-fetishists? Did you feel like there was a gap in that market? 

Nothing I do is really intentional. I do get readers sayings my work is "effective" and "makes them feel funny," which leads me to believe that people are actually jacking or jilling it to this stuff. Just going nuts on their own genitals while reading about a giant paperclip with a boner.  Maybe they are practicing or aspiring techno-fetishists learning more about themselves through erotica. Technology is becoming embedded in every aspect of our lives, and sexuality isn't immune from that, so it's natural for the tech around us to make its way into fantasies. You can bet that pretty soon, everyone will be engaging in weird or impossible fetishes through virtual reality. Maybe my stories are just a way to get ahead of the curve and experience some of that today, through the magic of imagination. For that reason, I'm probably the most important writer living today. [But] I write outside the technology niche as well, like a recent Idris Elba story, Minion erotica and Hamburglar porn. Pop culture is already surreal and fucked up, so to create something new within it, it's necessary to really chew it up and spit it out. Erotically.
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photo via Leonard Delaney / Twitter

How do you decide on what tech trends to write about? 

I try to tackle things that have zero erotic potential. It's hard, though. Like, Tetris blocks? They're just blocks but you get that sexy Russian music going, and the goal is to stick the long one in the appropriate gap, and it's deeply erotic. So everyone has [thoughts of fucking] Tetris blocks at least once. Maybe some day a tech trend will come along where I can chart completely new territory by sexualizing it. 

Are you a big erotica reader yourself? Do you have any favorite authors/series? 

I read within my sub-genre of erotica, whatever it's called. Bizarro erotica maybe? Chuck Tingle is obviously a master of the gayer side of it. I adore [I Don't Care if My Best Friend's Mom is a Sasquatch, She's Hot and I'm Taking a Shower With Her author] Lacey Noonan's writing style. And props to Hunter Fox, Christie Sims, and Virginia Wade for the dinosaur and bigfoot erotica that originally sprung out of the 50 Shades [of Grey] hysteria and paved the way for writing about even more unlikely things to rub up against.

You also have a publishing imprint for this work, right? Can you talk a little about that? Is there any new talent you're trying to discover etc.? 

I co-founded Forest City Pulp. The idea is to be built from the ground up to embrace the new reality of publishing: digital, rapidly evolving, and able to find niches that didn't exist before. Right now it's just a few local authors experimenting with what's possible. Which is a lot! Man, we live in a world where you can start a publishing venture with no budget, try something out, and if it doesn't work, all you've lost is time. Storytellers have never had such opportunity to try weird-ass things in this digital playground, and readers get to discover whatever weird-ass things they love but could never get from mainstream publishing. We're only caressing the surface of what's possible...[But] I don't mean to trash mainstream publishing. 

Anything else you're working on?

I have a story coming up in an anthology from a traditional small press, Monsterection. It's called The Office Photocopier Wants to Fuck Me. If I were to describe it, I'd say it's about a photocopier that wants to fuck.

Julian Casablancas Publishes His Uncensored Interview With Dev Hynes About Racism, Police Brutality

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photo via Twitter

The Strokes'Julian Casablancas and Blood Orange's Dev Hynes had a lengthy conversation in 2014 about police brutality, racism and the industry -- which never saw the light of day due to a series of snafus affected the publication of the interview. However, Casablancas has just taken things into his own hands by posting the full interview on his own website in its unaltered and uncensored entirety, and it's a fascinating read.

Screen Shot 2015-09-18 at 4.39.19 PM.pngOriginally supposed to be a feature in Interview, according to the duo it was left unprinted because the magazine wouldn't print it unedited. So they subsequently sat on it until Oyster published an edited version last week (that's since been taken down), which Hynes said was "fully edited and censored," adding that, "[they cut] out everything to do with race and my past that I discussed, which was not easy for me to do. Why? So they can have another bullshit piece to add to the noise of the internet?" Which is valid, seeing as how he shared personal stories about things like getting illegally arrested, bullied for not "acting black" and having his passport taken away in the process. Like, what?

Either way, you can read the interview in its entirety here. Be forewarned though, as Casablancas says at one point, "I apologize on behalf of white people, we're the worst."

[h/t Pitchfork]

The Best, Worst, and Weirdest of the Week

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Best Fake Projects: Run the Jewels went on Stephen Colbert's show, and besides an excellent musical performance, they made a fake ad for a number of Meow the Jewels-inspired projects. They're pretty funny, except that now we really do need an album of remixed breakup noises. -- Eric Thurm

Worst Real Side Project: Apparently The Strokes'Julian Casablancas invented a folding, pedal-less electric bike that he just patented. I'm confused though, did he just invent an iO Hawk or...? -- Sandra Song

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(photo via Hernando County Sheriff's Office)

Scariest Collection: This group of 3,700 knives a Florida woman had in her home. It is legitimately terrifying. (Also, she tried stabbing a police officer.) -- ET

Best Way to Catch 'Em All: This Twitter account going through celebrities and identifying which Pokemon they are is surprisingly spot-on, and capable of dishing out slander for Tyga in the best, subtlest way possible. -- ET

Narwhals Aiden and Ashley unite. Cheers to a happy marriage! 💑

A video posted by The Miscellany News (@themiscnews) on


Worst Procrastination Tactic: I think the Gothamist headline "Vassar Students Got Married In Dorm Because They Were Bored" sums it up pretty well. -- SS



Chillest Donkey of the Week: This Donkey! Dude is on planet Good Vibes. Where are his flip-up his sunglasses? -Elizabeth


16REVIEW1-master675.jpgCasey Kelbaugh / The New York Times

Most Da Fuq New York Fashion Week Beauty:
Thom Browne's awesome skyscraper braids. Brown never lets you down when it comes to extreme runway makeup looks (remember the Elizabethean clowns?) and these cuckoo-crazy, gravity-defying coiffures were no exception. --Elizabeth


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Best Quote of the Week: This one, from our incredible, must-read Q&A with tech-erotica writer Leonard Delaney. --Elizabeth 

Best New Gay Bar: A Swedish hip-hop duo named Far & Son just built a gay bar on land owned by the Russian presidency in protest of the country's crackdown on gay people. The whole Village People thing is just an added bonus. -- SS

tattoos.jpgBest for the Jews: new service promises to remove tattoos after you die and display them as art, which is creepy. But the idea has a pretty great unintentional application -- as any angst-ridden Jewish teenager will tell you, there's a persistence myth that members of the tribe can't be buried in Jewish cemeteries. Stick it to mom once and for all, and give her your tattoos when you're gone. She'll kvell! -- ET

Our Guide to the Best Parties at London Fashion Week

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What would fashion week be without the fashion week parties? Come nightfall, that's when the real catwalk comes alive, amid a bass-heavy flurry of champagne, live performances, celebrity guests and rarely a canapé in sight. So buckle up and prepare for the ride, as we unveil the guest lists worth fighting for at London Fashion Week.

Versus-Event-Image.pngWHAT: Versus Versace After Party
EXPECT: There ain't no party like a Versace party, and this weekend Donatella is throwing an almighty blow-out to celebrate Versus's debut at London Fashion Week. Expect A-list guests, live performances and a decked-out, glammed up venue, as Versace's naughty, rocky little sister lets loose on the capital. Dress code: sexy, black, asymmetrical.
WHERE: Victoria House Basement, WC1B
WHEN: Saturday, September 19th at 9:30pm
RSVP:
Invite Only
ODDS YOU'LL BE ABLE TO SNEAK IN:
15-85 

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 1.01.09 PM.pngWHAT: Louis Vuitton Series 3 -- Past, Present, Future launch
EXPECT: The highly-anticipated Louis Vuitton Series 3: Past, Present Future exhibition launches on Monday in London at Somerset house with an immersive, multi-sensory experience that retraces Nicolas Ghesquière's A/W15 collection collection for the French fashion house. In true Vuitton style, the exhibition will open with a cocktail and gala party, where revellers can break it down inside an otherworldly geodesic dome against the backdrop of curated glass cabinets, stately white sculptures and Juergen Teller's campaign photography.
WHERE: 180 Strand, WC2
WHEN: Sunday September 20th; cocktails at 7:30pm, afterparty at 9:30pm
RSVP:
Invite Only
ODDS YOU'LL BE ABLE TO SNEAK IN:
25-75

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 1.07.10 PM.pngWHAT: Simone Rocha Store Opening Cocktail
EXPECT: Simone Rocha will be toasting her new home on Mount Street with a celebratory cocktail over fashion week. The slick new boutique is certainly worth raising a glass to, but just watch out for the artwork: the store is punctuated by impressive sculptures and wall hangings, including a Francis Bacon triptych and a glazed ceramic chandelier by Los Angeles artist Pae White, alongside a series of decorative pieces created by Rocha herself.
WHERE: Simone Rocha boutique, 93 Mount St., London, W1K 2SY
WHEN: Sunday, September 20th, 7:30-9:30pm
RSVP:
Invite Only
ODDS YOU'LL BE ABLE TO SNEAK IN:
35-65



The Best Supermodel and Celeb Catwalk Cameos from Fashion Weeks Past

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We at PAPER can't stop thinking about the blockbuster Marc Jacobs show Thursday night at the Ziegfeld Theater. The über-glamorous défilé was chock full of sequins, feathers, and stars (both the shapes and the people). Our favorite part of the latter category was singer-songwriter Beth Ditto, who made an unexpected appearance on the catwalk in a floor length embellished gown. That got us thinking about other celebs and models who have made surprise appearances on the catwalk over the years -- here are a few of our favorites.


1. Madonna at Jean Paul Gaultier, Spring/Summer 1995  
Madonna and JPG have had been friends ever since the French designer created the now-infamous cone bra for the pop star's 1990 Blonde Ambition world tour. It's no surprise, then, that Madonna hit the catwalk for the designer WEARING his Spring/Summer 1995 collection. The cameo was the talk of Paris Fashion Week, not only because it was Madonna, but also because she was pushing a petite dog down the runway in an ornate baby carriage!

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2. Alexa Chung at Chanel, Spring/Summer 2014
This British it-girl is no stranger to fashion shows (especially Chanel!), but she usually sits in the front row instead of strutting down the runway. But, for the Spring/Summer 2014 Chanel show, Chung hit the runway in a grey-toned caplet dress and the sock-shoe hybrid that served as the staple of the collection.


3. Naomi Campbell at Givenchy Menswear, Spring/Summer 2016
The one and only Naomi Campbell hit the catwalk for her friend Riccardo Tisci's Givenchy Spring/Summer 2016 Menswear show. The supermodel came down the runway in an embellished blazer (and almost nothing else), exhibiting her signature, hip-centric walk. Campbell was also the face of the Fall/Winter 2011 Givenchy ads -- one of Tisci's most famous collections.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.09.23 PM.png4. Gemma Ward at Prada, Spring/Summer 2015
Gemma Ward, the Australian model opened the Prada Spring/Summer 2015 show -- several years after quitting the business. Ward was a fan favorite before leaving the runways, so this unexpected comeback sent shockwaves through the fashion community. And only a luminary like Miuccia Prada could get a model like Ward to come out of retirement.


5. Kirsten Owen at Rick Owens, Fall/Winter 2014
For Rick Owens' Fall/Winter 2014 show, the designer wanted to cast women who had played an important role in his career over the years, so '90s supermodel Kirsten Owen was a natural pick to open the show.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.17.41 PM.png6. Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson at Valentino, Spring/Summer 2015
At the end of the gorgeous Spring/Summer 2015 Valentino show the lights dimmed and out came Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson -- in character as Derek Zoolander and Hansel, and in full Valentino looks. The double celeb cameo was a teaser for the upcoming Zoolander sequel and made for a very Instagram-worthy moment.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.21.07 PM.png7. Maggie Rizer at Michael Kors, Spring/Summer 2015
Maggie Rizer -- the American model who was a designer favorite in the '90s and immortalized in a set of arresting Yohji Yamamoto ads -- left the industry in 2004 to focus on her personal life. Although the 2015 Michael Kors show wasn't her first job since deciding to come back to modeling, it was a surprising moment that boosted the collection's stock.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.22.19 PM.png8. Pat Cleveland at Moschino, Spring/Summer 2014
For Moschino's 30th anniversary collection, the label put on a joyous affair that paid homage to the genius of founder Franco Moschino. Pat Cleveland, the '70s supermodel who served as a muse to icons like Moschino, Yves Saint Laurent and Halston, opened the show. Since the cameo, Cleveland has starred in Tim Walker lensed Lanvin ads with her daughter Anna -- who is also a model.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.23.16 PM.png9. Kristen McMenamy at Viktor & Rolf Fall/Winter 2010
Kristen McMenamy a supermodel whose work made her the face of Versace for years, made a catwalk cameo as the centerpiece of the Viktor & Rolf Fall/Winter 2010 show. McMenamy wore every piece of the collection -- all at once! -- and was slowly stripped down as V and R themselves dressed other models in the clothes as she removed them. 


10. Kate Moss at Alexander McQueen, Fall/Winter 2006
After being shunned by the fashion community, Kate Moss was lucky to have the support of her dear friend Alexander McQueen. For his Fall/Winter 2006 show, McQueen created a massive prism that displayed a hologram of Moss floating in a tattered, beautiful gown. The gesture put Moss in the spotlight once again, helping to paper over her scandals.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.30.32 PM.png11. Lady Gaga at Mugler, Fall/Winter 2011
For Nicola Formichetti's debut at Mugler, the stylist-turned-designer enlisted the help of his close friend Lady Gaga to not only provide the soundtrack to the show, but also strut her stuff on the runway. The pop star lit the runway ablaze, sporting two high pigtails, an asymmetric hat, a skin-tight outfit, and, of course, a lit cigarette.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.31.53 PM.png12. Jean-Michel Basquiat at Comme des Garçons, Spring/Summer 1987 
The famous NYC artist made a surprising appearance on the catwalk, in a moment when the avant-garde in both art and fashion collided.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.33.14 PM.png13. Aimee Mullins at Alexander McQueen, Spring/Summer 1999
Alexander McQueen worked with a variety of inspiring women, so it's not surprising that his shows make this list twice. Paralympic athlete Aimee Mullens used two intricately carved wooden legs, specially made for her. In fact, McQueen got multiple requests for the "boots" that onlookers assumed she was wearing.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.33.58 PM.png14. Kendall Jenner at Marc Jacobs, Fall/Winter 2014
Marc Jacobs launched Kendall's career as a model, in a bit of casting that became the talk of NYFW (and the internet), especially after Jenner walked the runway in a sheer blouse, which made the surprise casting even more shocking to the public. Although her appearance was a shock at the time, Jenner is now a runway staple for many famous designers.

Screen shot 2015-09-19 at 12.35.11 PM.png15. Raquel Zimmerman at Givenchy, Spring/Summer 2016
To celebrate of the opening of the new Givenchy store on Madison Avenue, Tisci cast an all-star collection of models to hit his NYFW catwalk but the cherry on this fashion cake was closer Raquel Zimmermann -- a timeless beauty and a favorite of many a designer who, in recent years, hasn't been walking the catwalks as much.

The 10 Best Model Movies of All Time

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I can't imagine it being all that fabulous being a model. Sure, you look gorgeous and there's the fame. And you could have sex with Leonardo DiCaprio. But you have to weigh 50 pounds, wear ludicrous outfits, and prance up and down runways looking fierce in front of bored fashionistas.  And then you're all washed up at 30! But I love models in movies. And in honor of Fashion Week, which launches today in London and then moves on to Paris, I've made up a list of 10 of my favorite model movies:

Blowup.gifBlow-Up (1966)

Michelangelo Antonioni's film is really about a fashion photographer (David Hemmings) in swinging '60s London, but there's this scene where he gets into this intense modeling session with the gorgeous, leggy, Russian super model Veruschka that is unforgettable. It's exaggerated, sexy, and fun. Everything fashion should be.


polly-maggoo.gifWho Are You, Polly Maggoo? (1966)
Photographer William Klein's dark satire is about a model from Brooklyn (Dorothy MacGowan) who takes Paris by storm. Grayson Hall (of "Dark Shadows" fame) plays the editor of Vogue in this visually surreal, witheringly sardonic, film. This was impossible to track down for years but is out now in a lovingly restored DVD box set "The Delirious Fictions Of William Klein" from Criterion.

tumblr_mwc9syPetg1qfydhho1_400.gifMahogany (1975)
A real howler of a film starring Diana Ross as a young would-be-designer who claws her way from the slums of Chicago to the top of the fashion game. There have been lots of fun fashion show scenes in movies but the Kabuki-themed one here is a riot. Anthony Perkins plays a demented photographer who forces Ross to model wildly in a car traveling at 100 miles an hour at the end.

140723_EatYourMakeupMain5.jpgEat Your Makeup (1968)
A bizarre and funny early John Waters film about a deranged woman (Maelcum Soul) and her henchman (David Lochery) who kidnap women and force them to model themselves to death out in the woods.
       
still-of-faye-dunaway-in-puzzle-of-a-downfall-child-(1970)-large-picture.jpgPuzzle Of A Downfall Child (1970)
Jerry Schatzberg's film is about a model suffering a nervous breakdown and it's got a really sensational performance by Faye Dunaway in the lead. It's also the kind of movie you could never make now. So why the hell is this film not out on DVD?

tumblr_nf5pqjR2xi1s8grb8o1_500.gifGia (1998)
Angelina Jolie gives a harrowing performance as super model Gia Carangi, charting her heady rise and dizzying fall into drugs and an early death. This made-for-TV movie surprisingly packed a punch.

whoamigiphy.gifZoolander (2001)
Dumb (but guiltily enjoyable) comedy about Derek (Ben Stiller), a vapid male super model who is brainwashed to kill the prime minister of Malaysia. The runway "walk-off challenge" between Stiller and his arch model enemy Hansel (Owen Wilson) is pretty damn funny.


ChasingBeauty_Orig_750x971.jpgChasing Beauty (2013)
Insightful and fascinating documentary by Brent Huff dissecting the world of modeling with interviews with designers, models, agents, photographers, even plastic surgeons.

Screen Shot 2015-09-19 at 1.51.49 PM.pngBlood & Black Lace (1964)
Wildly influential thriller by Mario Bava about a mysterious, black-gloved, killer murdering fashion models in Rome. Bava's exaggerated use of lurid colors and inventive lighting was ripped off by many other directors but still remains unparalleled.

tumblr_li3cvxMsKS1qbilh4o1_500.gifFunny Face (1957)
Director Stanley Donen borrows fashion photographer Richard Avedon's eye for the look of this exquisite musical about a girl who works in a bookstore (Audrey Hepburn) who is transformed into a famous model by a photographer (Fred Astaire). Kay Thompson is fabulous as the head of a fashion magazine and her "Think Pink!" number is sublime. Perfection.






The Sunday Funnies

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15UOQ.jpg
Dads have it so fucking easy. [Mlkshk]


Drake's crowd work sucks. [ToddDracula]

 
A 98-year-old does the whip/Nae Nae dance from the "Watch Me" music video on his birthday. Except he calls it the "Whip Mayonnaise," which is even better. [TastefullyOffensive]
 
12002331_1070092006358833_5547492478304642067_n.jpgHans Solo putting Kim Davis on thug-level blast. [Mlkshk]

tumblr_nj1vj4u2Vm1qewacoo1_500.jpgOr shouting indistinguishably to the garbage truck drivers about being a "tax payer." [AfternoonSnoozeButton]

15UZZ.jpg3:30 a.m. bar scene. [Mlkshk]


A new Key and Peele blooper reel, featuring the line "I'd still jam my fork in your roast beef." Gonna miss this show so much.
 15UOV.gif#ALLDAY. [Mlkshk]


She's not someone's sister, someone's daughter, someone's mother: She's her own fucking person and she pops it when she wants. [FYeahDementia]

15UYZ.jpgSex. [Mlkshk]

tumblr_ms6cdvNgII1qa81n9o1_500.jpgtumblr_ms6cdvNgII1qa81n9o2_1280.jpgDe'nesha Diamond, THE DUCHESS. [FYouNoFMe]


Steven Colbert introduces you to his new lifestyle brand, and his living woods. [TheLateShow]

15UY4.gifCorrect. [Mlkshk]

15UZ6.gifWhen you burn the fuck out of someone in a work email and then sign it 'best.' [Mlkshk]


Very important video of a chill af baby donkey in a hammock. This is what we came here for, internet. [TastefullyOffensive]
 
tumblr_nip92ztIm91qewacoo1_500.jpgHas he asked you to get a meal together yet? Then move on. [AfternoonSnoozeButton]

15V3W.jpgWhen all the girls get together and everyone could get a sitter short notice! [Mlkshk]


Don't ever take sides with anyone against the family. [Mklshk]

tumblr_nuuyektaUO1qzmowao1_500.gifHave a great weekend! [FYeahDementia]

Spotify Has Some Trolly Customer Care Representatives

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rickroll.jpg
Turns out even your favorite streaming service has a sense of humor.

Back in February, a dude named Markus Price tweeted to Spotify Cares to give them some grief about being "accidentally" Rick Rolled. You know, that obnoxious Internet fad from a few years back when you'd be like "dude check this cool video" and it'd actually just be the video for Rick Astley's 1987 track "Never Gonna Give You Up"?


And as any good social team would do, they sent him a sincere apology -- that also came with an appropriate bait-and-switch bonus surprise.
  But shall we take a closer look at what they actually sent him?

   

Whoever put this together at Spotify customer relations deserves a big, fat raise.  

[h/t Daily Dot]

Updated: The Trailer for Stonewall is Refreshingly Conventional (or Maybe Not)

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stonewall.jpgFinally, the not-great-looking historical movies about gay pride can grace our theaters! The first trailer for Roland Emmerich's Stonewall is here, and it looks... fine? The movie uses an invented handsome white dude named Danny (Jeremy Irvine), who looks like he goes from a naive, suburban boy to an aggressive, confident activist. At least we've moved far enough along that a reasonably expensive-looking historical drama about gay rights is actually kind of boring. Besides, Ron Perlman looks like he'll be great as Ed Murphy, the shady manager of the Stonewall Inn itself.

Update: The trailer for the movie has -- rightly -- come under fire for whitewashing the moment of the Stonewall riots. particularly by making the focus of the film a conventionally attractive cis white man. Emmerich has responded to the accusations on his Facebook page, which you can find here. He's clearly concerned with "getting it right" and doing justice to the story -- and it's possible that the trailer was cut to highlight the story in a way supposedly acceptable to mass audiences -- but that doesn't negate the importance criticism.

The original version of the post lauds the fact that this movie is being made at all, but that is certainly not the only way of approaching the issue, and likely not (entirely, at least) the correct one. There is a more than valid, vital perspective on the mainstream success of the gay rights movement that sees it as, at least in some respects, a sad thing. Hopefully, Stonewall does right by as many of the people present at the original riots as possible, and hopefully it is not the last time the story is told on film.


The Best, Worst and Weirdest of this Week

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Greatest Horological Offense: This two-faced monstrosity, because maker Nico Gerard apparently believes that no one should have to face the plight of deciding whether to put on a Swiss timepiece or an Apple Watch in the morning (and also that somebody would be willing to shell out $9.2k+ for this thing). -- Victoria Lin


Most Ridiculous Clean Eating Product
: Whole Foods'"asparagus water," a.k.a. $5.99 bottles of, well, three stalks of asparagus sitting in water. We're not sure what you're supposed to do with it or why anyone would want it -- Whole Foods reps have variously claimed that you're supposed to drink it or that it's "broth," but we're still not sure it isn't just a social experiment to test the gullibility of the health-obsessed millennial consumer -- but someone, somewhere, will probably buy it. -- V.L.



Worst News about One Direction
: Not even the release of a new single and the news that former member Zayn Malik is back on the market can make up for this one. Louis Tomlinson confirmed Tuesday on Good Morning America that he is, in fact, going to be a father, breaking the hearts of every one of his 20 million Twitter followers (and ours as well). -- V.L.

Idris Elba.jpgBest Magazine Cover (Other Than Ours, Of Course)
: We present to you, without comment, this image of Idris Elba smoldering at the camera. (On a more serious note, the cover is Maxim's first without a woman -- a big step for the lad mag and an indication of their reinvention under new editor-in-chief Kate Lanphear.) -- V.L.

friends ross.jpgWorst Friends Alum Project: As part of a public art project called Sing Chicago, the Bean -- an iconic Chicago sculpture perhaps most famous for appearing in this Kanye West music video -- will be voiced by none other than David Schwimmer, who apparently will creepily call your phone and dump a lot of information on you. -- Eric Thurm

compton.jpgBest Surprise Rap Album: After many, many, many years of rumors and scrapped versions of Detox, Dr. Dre has finally released a new album for, of all things, the N.W.A. movie, Straight Outta Compton. It's actually really good, contrary to what you might expect -- maybe the best musical surprise in a while. -- E.T.

Best Surprise Rap Album, Collab Edition: The Chance the Rapper-Lil B mixtape, which is still extremely confusing and awe-inspiring in the way only a religious object can be. Bow down, because the Based God is here. -- E.T.

bustarhymes.jpg
Best Comeback: Busta Rhymes was apparently arrested this week after throwing a protein shake at a fellow gym-goer. Talk about flexing. -- Sandra Song  

Weirdest Sports News: This week the International Olympic Committee officially recognize Ultimate Frisbee as an actual sport, though that doesn't mean it'll necessarily be in the 2020 Games. Instead, it'll join a pool of "considered sports" that include activities like baseball, climbing, surfing, karate, and lest we forget "life saving." Really. -- S.S.

tumblr_nspm8rVDwk1rgcqrbo1_500.jpgBest Internetification of Donald Trump, Besides Deep Donald:This image. "He shout his butthole clean off" will have us laughing through Monday. -- Elizabeth Thompson

Screen Shot 2015-08-07 at 6.37.50 PM.pngBest Artist X Sports Team Cross-over We Did Not See Coming:
Jenny Holzer t-shirts are now for sale on the Dallas Cowboys' website. Her Truisms series was beamed onto the AT&T Stadium's massive video screen in 2009 (art-collecting Cowboys owner Jerry Jones and his family are Holzer fans) and six years later Holzer merch is, awesomely, weirdly, available for purchase alongside Cowboys beer koozies . And for sale! A sense of timing is the mark of genius. Or something. -- Elizabeth Thompson



Baby Girl's Back: Timbaland Says He Has Unreleased Aaliyah On The Way

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Timbaland is doing evidently all he can to keep Aaliyah's memory alive and well, from his recent production of Tink's "Million" remake to his consistent shout-outs on social media -- and now he's about to take it one step further by finally releasing some unreleased music from the late and great R&B singer.

Over the weekend, Timbaland took to Instagram to confirm, that he does, in fact, have unreleased deep cuts from his time as her frequent collaborator. Following up on Sunday with another 'gram that showed Aaliyah with a Straight Outta Compton spoof stamp ("Straight Outta Heaven"), it seems to now just be a matter of waiting for him to drop it.

Believe us, Timbo, we will "Stay tune!!!!!!" 

Stay tune!!!!!!

A photo posted by Timbo the King (@timbaland) on


[h/t Jezebel]


Timbaland first worked with Aaliyah when he and Missy Elliot co-produced most of her second album, One in a Million, and the three became close friends and frequent collaborators. This year, Timbaland produced a remake of the album's title track for rising singer and rapper, Tink. The original tune, was at the top of the Mainstream R&B/Hip-Hop Airplay chart for eight weeks in 1996 t0 1997, reports Billboard.

No, it's Not Too Early to Make Casting Suggestions for True Detective Season Three

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true d s2.jpgTrue Detective, season two is finally over. Poor Vince Vaughn, Colin Farrell, Rachel McAdams, and Taylor Kitsch are all good actors, but had their talents squandered on dialogue that was apparently so opaque it requires several thousand words to even mostly explain. Showrunner and bear Nic Pizzolatto has taken a perhaps slightly unfair amount of criticism. After aggressively painting himself as a "brooding, tortured masculine artist" and lashing out at the mere hint of reasonable criticism, he'd primed critics (and many TV fans) to respond negatively to the new season, which theydidwithglee.

Or, if not glee, at least a certain sense of righteous satisfaction. Time and intellectual space are limited, and in a medium with so much innovative material and where even network executives admit to content overload, everyone has to spend their nights writing and thinking about a bunch of brooding, boring cops created by a guy who consistently tells everyone who great he is? No one planning to seriously write about True Detective should have decided to bury Pizzolatto going into the season, but it's not surprising that he gave himself a much higher standard of quality, and, accordingly, not surprising that even The New York Times made a merciless video asking fans to try to explain just what was going on with this season (spoiler alert: they failed).



But the season isn't without its defenders, even when they have to go to kind of unreasonable lengths to do so. Writing for The Daily Beast, Marlow Stern claims that the reputation of this season will be rehabilitated in a few years. He argues:

Whether by design or not, Pizzolatto has created a tremendously entertaining, campy neo-noir that will, years from now, be celebrated as a cult favorite. Where else can you see Tim Riggins play a closeted gay biker cop who pops Viagra to sex women, the chatterbox from Swingers ripping out a 400-pound pimp's gold grill with pliers, Regina George slicing-and-dicing an orgy security guard, or Colin Farrell threatening to butt-fuck a small child's father on his family's front lawn with his mom's headless corpse?
This may well be true, but it's also one of the most damning types of praise imaginable -- suggesting that the show stumbled so badly that, many years in the future, it will be treated as a sort of prestige TV version of The Room, something so bad that college students will get really stoned and laugh at its sheer overwrought insanity. "Did anyone actually think this was good in 2015?" they will ask.



If that's the case, then maybe Pizzolatto's best bet is to go all-in on True Detective season three as an intentionally campy, insane, melodramatic piece of trash. And since it's never too early to restart a new round of True Detective fantasy-casting memes, we sat down and asked ourselves: Who should be in the balls-out, admittedly-terrible version of True Detective season three that, as of now, exists only within the minds of our fellow humans on the internet? Some possibilities:



Hugh Grant, Zac Efron, and Morgan Freeman
Grant plays the embattled older cop trying to give young hotshot rookie Zac Efron (who is also his son) a good experience for his first day on the job. Cult leader Morgan Freeman, who has built a religious community on a shared love of jazzercise, has other ideas.

Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, and Taylor Swift
True D moves into sci-fi in this extended remake of the "Bad Blood" video, starring Stewart and McKellen as aging freedom fighters (and mostly-true detectives) in a space dystopia trying to find the secrets of a brilliant young inventor who could undo the past (Swift).



Everyone Who Has Ever Played the Leader of the Losing Crew in a Dance Movie
This one is just a classic revenge story, with a fantastic soundtrack of early '00s jams.



The Original Cast of The Real Housewives of New York
Countess LuAnn, O.G. Saved by the Bell PA Bethenny Frankel, Ramona Singer, Jill Zarin and Alex McCord back together again and ready to stare wistfully across some water (because this season is a locked-room murder mystery and also it takes place on a fishing boat off the coast of Alaska). Just admit it. You would watch this. And love it.

toon squad.jpgThe Tune Squad
If we're going to get a Space Jam 2, let's get it with a little existential misery thrown in.

Gustave Cour-slay: Famous Artworks Get Campy Selfie Make-Overs

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Egon Schiele, Self-Portrait with Arm Twisting above Head, 1910.

Over the weekend, Artnet decided to put some classic works of art through a selfie-editing app called Perfect365, and the results are equal parts camp and Selfish-levels of perfection. Making over everyone from Realist pioneer Gustave Courbet (with a pair of colored contacts and some gloss -- though his blush has stayed put) to a cinema colorization of Cindy Sherman's famous untitled film still. Other notable alterations include some purple shadow on Jan van Eyck, eyeliner on Frida Kahlo and a fabulous blow-out for Vincent Van Gogh. Check out a few of our favorites below.

Carrie-mae-weems-self-portrait.jpg
Carrie Mae Weems, Untitled (Woman Standing), 1990.

Screen Shot 2015-08-10 at 11.48.27 AM.pngGustave Courbet, Self-Portrait (The Desperate Man), c. 1843-45.

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Cindy Sherman, Untitled Film Still 21, 1978.

rembrandt.jpg
Rembrandt, Self-Portrait, 1659.

vincent-van-gogh-selfie.jpg
Vincent van Gogh, Self-Portrait, 1887.

van-eyck.jpg
Jan van Eyck, Portrait of a Man, 1433.

frida-kahlo.jpg
Frida Kahlo, Self-Portrait with Thorn Necklace and Hummingbird, 1940.

A Couple Accidentally Had a Future "Dirty Sprite 2"-Themed Wedding

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#LoveAndHipHopNC CONGRATS @westiebaybee & @dlive87 !!! 👰🏻💍🎩 so glad we got to be a part of this! 😘

A photo posted by Caroline Buck (@catlovescake23) on


While Drake and Meek Mill fight over some petty shit, Future's Dirty Sprite 2 has stealthily become the full album of the summer, and one of the strongest rap releases of the year. Partly, that's because of his strength of personality, leading to an aggressively devoted following -- even when Future does kind of sketchy stuff, the glee and zeal of his fans makes it hard to stay mad at him. So naturally, the possibility of an entire DS2-themed wedding made the internet very, very excited.

Sadly, the couple, Donovan Livingston and Lauren West-Livingston, claim that the theme of their wedding was an accident. In an interview with USA Today, the pair say that the color gradient was unintentional (combining each of their favorite colors), but that once the DS2 cover art had been unveiled, they decided to make a program for the wedding that used the art and took the form of a track list.

Screen Shot 2015-08-10 at 2.53.22 PM.pngThat's pretty cool, except that the newlyweds apparently only played one Future song at their wedding ceremony. Sure, it was "Fuck Up Some Commas," but they couldn't even throw in "March Madness" for everyone who showed up for the wedding? Seriously? It hardly seems like an imposition on their special day. (Admittedly, Future fans are never satisfied.)

Still, even if Livingston and Livingston-West didn't intentionally get their diamonds from Africa, they can still ride off into the sunset knowing they had the best, most fortuitously timed wedding ever. Most importantly, when they have children who are old enough to ask where they came from, the parents can look mad lovingly into each other's eyes, and after that, turn back to their lil one and proudly and honestly say: #FutureHive.

A Florida FOX Anchor Threw a Tantrum Over Kylie Jenner

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The Kardashians have successfully made themselves ubiquitous pop cultural figures, so famous that pretty much anything they do is noted. But is it too much? Is it just too difficult to keep up with the Kardashians? One brave Florida man took a stand, crying aloud on his FOX 35 local news show that he did not want to talk about chemtrail enthusiast Kylie Jenner's rabbit, Bruce. "I'm having a good Friday, so I refuse to talk about the Kardashians today," he yelps, practicing a level of self-love and care that would make Kim proud. "it's a non-story," he cries, turning it into a story.


The segment never quite veers into classic news anchor meltdown territory, but it's still funny and interesting to see the carefully constructed persona of a person whose job it is to go on-camera and spout nonsense every day crumble. "Nobody cares about the Kardashians anymore!" John Brown yells during a segment that is funny to watch precisely because people care about the Kardashians. [via Mediaite]

Kim Kardashian Has To Justify Her Pregnant Body Because The World Is Garbage

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19 Year-Old Girl Attempts To "Protect" Ferguson Cops

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So last night a 19 year-old St. Louis University student named Lexi Kozhevsky placed herself in front of Ferguson police officers in an attempt to "protect" them on the one-year anniversary of Michael Brown's death. Because apparently violence isn't "the way to make progress."

For the record, I'm not happy to be putting a naive girl who is obviously extremely sheltered on blast, but this bullshit reaches levels of tone-deaf I can hardly fathom. And the fact people are commending her for being "courageous" and "wise beyond her years" is just deeply WTF.

It takes a crazy sense of entitlement to think that people want to hear from you, a 19-year-old with zero stake in race-related police brutality, about issues that directly affect black lives. Especially when it comes to her explanation for protecting a  police department that's gotten in hot water over sending emails referring to Obama as a "chimpanzee" and for mockingly using bastardized examples of African-American Vernacular English. Because according to Lexi, fixing this whole deeply fractured race relations thing is as easy as just attempting to "reach out to government officials, start petitions, make a change. But don't be violent. It hurts the community more than anything."

After all, is it likely that the police officers who have consistently fucked up for the past year are going to take a Change.org petition seriously? Then there's the sad irony that this entire thing went down with Kozhevsky wearing a Fall Out Boy with a cringe-y Native American dream catcher on it. Because guess what other group is also disproportionally killed by police? Yep, you guessed it, Native Americans!

And while it's good for young people to be socially active, in the wise words of Twitter celebrity Mr. Pooni:
 
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