Articles on this Page
- 01/17/12--07:44: _The Morning Funnies...
- 01/17/12--08:09: _You've Got Mail Get...
- 01/17/12--08:24: _Taylor Swift Covers...
- 01/17/12--09:45: _Portlandia Recap! E...
- 01/18/12--06:03: _Tips for Today: Sha...
- 01/18/12--07:15: _Free Stuff Alert! W...
- 01/18/12--08:10: _Jessica Biel's Hair...
- 01/18/12--08:40: _The Morning Funnies...
- 01/18/12--09:30: _SOPA & PIPA Uproar ...
- 01/18/12--09:33: _All Hail Herrema
- 01/18/12--10:30: _Jon Glaser's Insane...
- 01/18/12--11:00: _Matt Bomer On Strip...
- 01/18/12--12:00: _Grammy Host LL Cool...
- 01/18/12--12:45: _Forget Lindsay and ...
- 01/18/12--13:05: _A*M*E's "City Light...
- 01/18/12--13:30: _Chairlift Gets Wet ...
- 01/18/12--14:00: _Celebrity Couples o...
- 01/18/12--14:45: _Paris Hilton & LMFA...
- 01/18/12--15:45: _Male Models in the ...
- 01/20/12--05:30: _Tips for Today: Cav...
- 01/17/12--08:09: You've Got Mail Gets the Tribute Treatment
- 01/17/12--08:24: Taylor Swift Covers Vogue, Looks Very High-Fashion Hippie
- 01/17/12--09:45: Portlandia Recap! Episode Two: "One Moore Episode"
- 01/18/12--08:10: Jessica Biel's Hairstyle How-To
- 01/18/12--09:30: SOPA & PIPA Uproar Just Might Be Doing the Trick!
- 01/18/12--09:33: All Hail Herrema
- 01/18/12--10:30: Jon Glaser's Insanely Funny Delocated Has An Awesome Promo Video
- 01/18/12--11:00: Matt Bomer On Stripping, Canklets and Being Arrested
- 01/18/12--12:45: Forget Lindsay and Megan: Our Short List For the Liz Taylor Biopic
- 01/18/12--13:05: A*M*E's "City Lights" Is Our Music Video of the Day
- 01/18/12--13:30: Chairlift Gets Wet at the Mondrian L.A.
- 01/18/12--14:00: Celebrity Couples of Yesteryear
- 01/18/12--15:45: Male Models in the Wild at Men's Milan Fashion Week, Fall 2012
Everyone could use a good chuckle first thing in the morning. Which is why we decided to pen this new daily column, The Morning Funnies, featuring the five most hilarious things that we stumbled upon before lunchtime.
1. Watch a video wherein Bill O'Reilly proves that he knows the difference between Ice-T and Ice Cube to Fox News media critic Bernie Goldberg, explaining, "I'm a brother, man." [Buzzfeed]
2. Stephen Colbert's Super PAC released an amazing new ad that ran during last night's GOP debate in South Carolina wherein he urged South Carolinians to vote for Herman Cain. [Talking Points Memo]
3. Behold: Drunk Ron Swanson
4. "What is Donkey Punch?" [The Daily What]
5. The first photo of Karl Lagerfeld's new kitten, Choupette. [Refinery 29, via V]
"We've Got Mail: An Interactive You've Got Mail Experience"
Housing Works, 126 Crosby St.
Ahhh! Taylor Swift looks so pretty on the new cover of Vogue. Very "Sienna Miller BoHo Chic" (sorry, eBay joke!). She also looks sort of like a painting! As Mr. Mickey says, "this photo makes me feel like she's someone you'd actually want to hang out with, instead of feeling like you're stuck as a chaperone at her high school prom." What do you think?
In "One Moore Episode," the second episode of Portlandia's second (so far, so stellar) season, Fred and Carrie come closest to developing a thesis statement for the show, one that reveals that this isn't simply a zany sketch comedy romp like Mr. Show or Kids in the Hall, but a comedic social commentary about how hipsters see themselves. In the third sketch of Friday night's episode, Jeff Goldblum guest-stars as Alan, the foppish owner of an artisan knot store. Fred and Carrie visit the shop (after reading about it in the Sunday Times) looking to buy a knot to give to a friend as a housewarming gift. They end up buying a set of tangled-up iPod earbuds. "An artist that we work with makes these by jamming them in his pocket," Goldblum says. "You can pair these with a rosé or even a burgundy." Fred and Carrie present the gift at the party, and the hostess takes the gift, goes down to her basement and places it on a table filled with other artisan knot gifts. The (very funny) joke: Hipsters pride themselves on thinking they're so unique, but in essence, they're all the same. It's a hipster's worst nightmare. The punchline to the sketch was the first time I could see why Portlandia gives my Portlander and Greenpoint friends the willies.
Because Fred and Carrie sharpen their claws with the writing in "One Moore Episode," it's also one of the series' sharpest episodes. The cold open sketch, "Allergy Pride Parade" casts Fred and Carrie as TV presenters at a Portland parade celebrating people who suffer from allergies to wheat, makeup, soy, bug bites, milk, Pad Thai and on and on. The sketch ends with Carrie's character dying because she's allergic to dextrose. I love that Portlandia doesn't shy away from heightening a sketch to the point where someone dies from the game of the scene. The show's fearlessness in getting laughs (and getting really dark sometimes) is one of its strengths.
The episode's title sketch, "One Moore Episode," finds Fred and Carrie getting dangerously addicted to Battlestar Galactica. Anyone who has watched that show (or The Wire or Doctor Who or Downton Abbey) can attest to the experience of needing to watch "one more episode" of the serial again and again to the point of exhaustion. This sketch taps into that TV viewing experience and heightens it to the point where Fred and Carrie lose their jobs from watching so much Battlestar. When they run out of episodes to watch, they track down (who they think is) the show's writer, Ronald D. Moore, to write one more episode. It climaxes with a hilarious read-through, featuring Edward James Olmos, and the actual Ronald D. Moore as a local Portland actor who is "currently playing the Mad Hatter."
This episode also features one of the biggest guest-stars of the season, Pearl Jam frontman (and Carrie's former Sleater-Kinney tourmate) Eddie Vedder. Kudos to Vedder, who's usually described as a humorless dude, for being game to poke fun at himself. The sketch's premise -- having a terrible tattoo - leads to some super silly animation, and even though Vedder is such a good sport, you can see why he hasn't acted since 1992's Singles. Vedder should stick to crooning "Betterman" and leave the acting to Anthony Kiedis.
Dowload "One Moore Episode" on iTunes here!
Sharon Van Etten at Mercury Lounge
We wish we could tell you how to nab Justin Timberlake too, but that's not really in our repertoire. Instead Papermag asked celebrity hairstylist Davy Newkirk to walk us through the hair secrets of one of our favorite hair looks at the Golden Globes: his client Jessica Biel's boho-chic tresses. Here, he explains how he created Biel's thick waves while sharing some of his other favorite styles from the red carpet!
Can you walk us through how you created Jessica's Globes hairstyle?
We wanted Jessica's hair to compliment the "bohemian luxury" feel of her dress and I loved the idea of natural cascading waves against the backdrop of the dress' backless silhouette. Jessica has a great head of hair--the texture is fine but she has a ton of it!
First, I applied Alterna Bamboo Volume Weightless Whipped Mousse all over her damp hair and Alterna Bamboo Volume Uplifting Root Blast to her roots for extra volume and lift while maintaining the feather-light feel. Then, I blow-dried her hair using a large round brush to smooth the cuticle and ensure a polished result. When her hair was 95% dry, I used Alterna Bamboo Style Boho Waves Tousled Texture Mist to give it texture and wave, then finished drying it with my fingers. Next, I divided her hair into 1" sections and created waves using a 1¼" curling iron, alternating between wrapping and clamping sections to maintain the organic movement to the look. Then, I used my fingers to apply Alterna Bamboo Style Moldable Texture Paste and combed it through the curls, followed by the Alterna Bamboo Smooth Anti-Humidity Hair Spray to set the style and lock-out frizz. Last, I used texture paste again to smooth pieces around the face.
What's the key to red carpet-ready hair?
Finishing [spray]! This is the red carpet after all. It polishes off even the most effortless looks and provides hold throughout the evening.
Aside from Jessica what were some of your favorite hair looks at the Golden Globes this year?
I loved the way Angelina Jolie looked. Her dress was amazing and I loved her simple hair and make up. I also loved Kate Beckinsale's look.
2. Watch Sam Worthington as he squirms around in his way-too-tight Hawaiian shirt on last night's Tonight Show with Jay Leno.
3. Check out this Coachella lineup spoof. Love "K-Z in Steve Aoki's Phone Contacts" and "Overpriced Water." [via WorkitLA]
4. Multiple moviegoers in Liverpool, UK, apparently demanded their money back after seeing Golden Globe-winning film The Artist, claiming they did not realize it was silent. [Via HuffPo]
Wikipedia, Google and a ton of other sites are protesting the Internet regulation bills SOPA and PIPA today, blacking out their homepages, or taking their sites down all together, to speak out against the bills. If passed, SOPA and PIPA, which together, sounds like a que delicioso menu item, would make the Internet a very, very un-fun place. The bills are ostensibly meant to help fight the pirating of music and films, and would force
U.S. companies to stop selling online ads to suspected pirates. A well-intended idea in theory, but one that could do a ton more harm than good. These bills are pretty over-reaching and would impose Internet censorship rules that, if passed, could throw out the Lolcats with the Ron Swanson GIF bathwater. Or, as Wikipedia put it, "would be devastating to the free and open web." SAD FACE. Understandably, there's been a huge online uproar about this and, below, we've rounded up 15 sites voicing their dissent. You can learn more about SOPA and PIPA and how you can voice your dissent on the only English Wiki page that's live today.
UPDATE! It looks like this is working, Internet! Marco Rubio (R-Fla) , who was a co-sponsor of PIPA, just announced that he's pulling his support for the Protect IP Act. [Politico] The bills also don't have the White House's support. Monday, Forbes reported that Obama would veto any bill that wasn't "more narrowly focused."
Oh No They Didn't
RedditBoingboingWikipediaMashable Cheezburger Network
When we heard that Paper magazine Beautiful People Alum and star of USA's White Collar, Matt Bomer, was going to be randomly chilling at the Empire State Building, we couldn't resist the opportunity to head over to the Observatory Deck and talk to him about his show, raising hell as a Texan teen and going to male strip clubs to prep for his upcoming film, Magic Mike. (And besides, considering that his flick is about male strippers, we got a kick out of the phallic subtext in having the interview atop New York's most famous skyscraper.)
I never have. And my palms are really sweaty. It's beautiful.
So what can you tell us about the rest of this season on White Collar?
I have a commutation hearing, which means I could be a free man. I could be rid of my canklet, which is what I call it. Not an "anklet" but a "canklet."
How has it been wearing one of those on the show? Does it make you feel like Lindsay Lohan?
I do think it informs me.
I always wear it. It's something that even if it's a subconscious thing, there's some type of awareness going on that I am hampered. Somebody who wants freedom so much does have his wings clipped. But I have relationships [with my canklets]. We had this really uncomfortable, god-awful one the first season. They literally kept [it] on my ankle with a staple. Like, I had a bloody ankle! But now, of course, they've souped it up. My new one's name is Subi. My first one's name was Candy the Canklet. And my new one has a very kinda German-chic look to it. And I think "candy" in German is "Süßigkeiten" or something so I thought I'd call her "Subi."
Oooh, do you speak German?
No, I just asked.
Well speaking of canklets, when you were growing up in Texas, did you ever raise hell?
Have you ever been arrested?
I've been brought in but no real record.
What did you get brought in for?
A bunch of friends of mine and I decided after we graduated high school we would just go visit the high school and leave some posters and signs up that expressed how we felt about certain faculty members.
What kinds of things are we talking about here?
Just incredibly offensive, juvenile things that only an 18-year-old could come up with. Or 17, which I guess we were at the time. We were busted and I actually got away but I came back to make sure my friends were alright and then I sort of turned myself in, I guess.
So you had a guilty conscience.
The principal did a great job disciplining us because many of our posters revolved around him and he said, "Come into my office. Let's chat about this." And I was of course petrified. And he had the poster hanging up in his office.
Did it have his photo on it?
Drawings. Drawings. Elaborate, elaborate drawings.
What kind of drawings?
Let's not go there. But I think he did such a great job in terms of handling it that the point was made very clearly. I was not going to be hanging any more posters any time soon.
So let's talk about your new movie, Magic Mike. How was it playing a male stripper?
It was terrifying and exciting and enervating and intimidating. All those things.
How did you prep for it? Did you and your cast mates visit any Chippendale-type places?
I did. I went solo and I think some other guys went to other places. I reached out to this group called The Hollywood Men who were super collaborative and welcoming. They let me come into the club and a lot of my character's scenes are in this Altman-esque world of before and after they go onstage and they let me experience a lot of that. They let me go onstage a little bit. I didn't perform but they let me hang in the wings while people were performing so I could get the relationship to the audience. So that was really fun. Then we did a lot of choreography with an amazing choreographer called Alison Faulk who choreographs for Britney Spears and Madonna and was able to take what we had and accentuate that and hide the things that we were really shitty at.
So who had the best moves? You or [co-star] Channing Tatum?
Channing by far! Channing's dancing in this movie is, I mean, it defies the laws of physics! It's insane. I can't wait for people to see it. They're just gonna freak out. It was one of the most amazing things I've ever seen.
Any other prep work that was particularly interesting or excruciating? I read somewhere that you had to get your chest waxed?
Yeah, I think everybody had to come correct in terms of what those people do. It was a lot of training, waxing, self-tanning, those kinds of things that are a necessity for that job. And while they weren't enjoyable, they definitely helped inform the experience and helped you out when you're out onstage doing your thing.
Magic Mike is out June 29th; White Collar is on Tuesdays, at 10 p.m., on USA.
George Wayne: People say that you have matured, that you are not as arrogant as you used to be. I don't believe that's true. What do you think?
LL Cool J: I don't want to condemn myself and ever have to say that i was arrogant. i think that there is a very fine line between pride and arrogance. I'm just proud and confident of what I do.
GW: The press release for your new album prides your "cocksure attitude" and "oral acrobatics." Can you tell me what this means?
LL: Well, that was someone else's interpretation. I just tried to put together an album so a person could experience some spirituality, some sensuality, some humor, in the essence of rap music.
GW: Have you ever fucked a Hollywood star?
LL: [Long pause] No.
LL: [Nods his head in the negative]
GW: Are you dating anyone now?
LL: I have a girlfriend. Her name is Kidada. [Ed: Kidada Jones, Rashida's older sis!]
GW: When are you going to get married?
LL: It's a thought, but it's not something I want to do right away.
GW: How long have you been going out with her?
LL: About two years.
GW: Give me some of your vital statistics -- height, weight, the size of your feet.
LL: Six-foot two-inches, 216 pounds -- and I wear a size thirteen.
GW: What kind of food gives your orgasms?
LL: I've never eaten any food that did that.
GW: Would you do an underwear campaign like Marky Mark did?
GW: Why not?
LL: Because I don't see a reason to. I don't see what it has to do with my music.
GW: But couldn't it be seen as an extension, just like the movies you do?
LL: It is an extension, but you know what it is? I'm not interested in doing endorsements. I don't want to dance for chicken. I don't want to rap about soda or beer. And I don't want to wear nobody's underwear.
GW: You don't wear underwear?
LL: Yeah, I wear underwear.
GW: So you mean if Coca Cola came to you with five million dollars to do a commercial, you'd say no?
LL: I wouldn't do it. I understand that everybody has a price. It all sounds beautiful, but the reality is, I wouldn't. For me personally, I would lose some of my integrity. I would feel jiggabooish dancing for chicken or rapping about somebody's soda. [Ed. he has since appeared in commercials for the Gap, Old Spice, and yes, Coca Cola.]
GW: Do you mind being considered a sex symbol?
LL: I don't think I'm a sex symbol. Just because I comment on something sexual, it doesn't mean I want to be a sex symbol.
GW: Are you testicle laden?
LL: In terms of what? Like what? Big balls? I don't know? I'm happy with them. They are O.K. I am a healthy young man.
GW: If someone asked me how big LL Cool J's swagger was, I'd say it was very, very big. Would you agree?
LL: I would say I feel comfortable.
GG: What do you think of battymen?
LL: To each his own. I'm not homophobic, but I like women.
GG: Suppose a Hollywood producer came to with an idea of starring in a movie with Madonna, which would require you to fuck her, sometimes doggy style, in every room of her house. Would you do it?
LL: I'm not into that. I'm not into whips and chains and Madonna and that kind of vibe. I'm not into that.
GG: What do you do in your spare time?
LL: Check out a movie. Go to the mall, get a milk shake....
With recent news that Megan Fox may now be in contention for the coveted lead role in the Liz Taylor biopic (look out Lindsay!), our brains have gone into overdrive imagining what other starlets could play ol' Violet Eyes. And as you'll see below, don't count the redheads and blondies out!
1. Emma Stone -- She's smart and sassy just like Liz but, unlike the icon, who had a well-known love of baubles, Stone prefers a simpler sartorial look (check out Mr. Mickey's review of her refined Golden Globes ensemble for a good example). Perhaps that might all change with time.
2. Anna Kendrick -- She's Taylor's nose twin!
3. Jessica Biel -- The soon-to-be Mrs. Timberlake has yet to take on any Oscar-worthy roles but maybe as Liz she can prove her acting career didn't peak at Mary Camden.
4. Michelle Williams -- She's already nailed it portraying one glamorous icon -- who says she can't handle another?
5. Natalie Portman -- She's got the look, has the acting chops and can play crazy. Besides, Taylor was a Member of the Tribe too (she converted, if you want to be technical about it).
6. Lizzie Olsen -- Yes she's blonde but that's nothing a fabulous wig can't change (or a Method-style dye job). She's also the right mix of demure and seductive -- a combination that made the young Taylor a star (though by hubby #4, it was clear Liz's seductive side had won out).
7. Evan Rachel Wood -- From dating Marilyn Manson to going full-frontal (and talking about her merkin) in Mildred Pierce, this chick is ballsy. We'd like to see her playing Liz playing Martha in Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?
8. Olivia Thirlby -- If studio execs decide they'd rather find an indie-ier version of Lindsay or Megan, perhaps they should consider this raven-haired looker. We're still obsessed with her as the teenage vixen in The Wackness and she's proven she can rock short hair.
9. Kristen Stewart -- Okay, she's pouty and doesn't exude any of Liz's charisma but like others on this list, Stewart's edge could be an asset when it comes to portraying the darker side to the famous Hollywood star.
10. Emmy Rossum -- Though she burst onto the scene glittering and princess-like in Phantom of the Opera, after one marriage, one divorce and the unleashing of an inner wild-child in Shameless, we're pretty sure Rossum's good girl persona had a shelf life as short as Ms. Taylor's first marriage. Now she should channel her newfound chutzpah into portraying this Grand Dame.
This young artist from Sierra Leone has a pre-gangster, old-school vibe that we love. Like Kid 'N Play or Salt-n-Pepa, she's young, upbeat and has a heavy injection of pop in her sound. A*M*E is 17 and living in London now, working on her debut album and "City Lights" is her first video. Love the crazy designs she wears on her lips!
We have a new obsession, and it is a Tumblr blog called Old Loves (which we found via Miss Moss), featuring old photos of former celebrity couples. We. Can't. Stop. Looking. At. It. See what we've wasted the past hour staring at, and check out some of our favorites below, a ragtag group that includes everyone from Pauly Shore & Tiffani Amber Thiessen to Madonna & Vanilla Ice to our favorite surprisingly-sexy couple, Kathy Griffin & Jack Black.
Kathy Griffin and Jack Black
Ben Stiller and Jeanne Tripplehorn, 1994
Christian Slater and Samantha Mathis, 1989
Tony Kanal and Gwen Stefani, 1987
Jane Fonda and Anthony Perkins, 1960
Jewel and Sean Penn, 1995
David Rose and Judy Garland, 1941
Zooey Deschanel and Matthew Davis, 2000
Minka Kelly and Donald Faison, 2004
Nick Cave and P.J. Harvey, 1996
Sarah Jessica Parker and Robert Downey Jr., 1988
Pauly Shore and Tiffani Amber Thiessen
Tupac and Jada Pinkett Smith
Paul Simon and Shelly Duvall, 1977
Scott Baio and Brooke Shields, 1977
Diane Keaton and Al Pacino, 1971
Martin Scorsese and Isabella Rossellini, 1981
Glenn Close and Woody Harrelson
Madonna and Vanilla Ice, 1990
Ryan Reynolds and Kristin Johnson, 1999
Laura Dern and Kyle McLaughlin, 1991
1. Paris Hilton + LMFAO = Hit Song? She's hooking-up with the "sexy" duo on a new track for her second album. Hilton's bf Afrojack is still "executive producer." [Billboard]
2. The Jacques Garcia-designed NoMad Hotel (1170 Broadway) will have six "dining spaces" under the direction of Daniel Humm and Will Guidara of Eleven Madison Park. [NYP]
3. Deadmau5 opens the newly re-vamped Miami nightclub Mansion (1235 Washington Ave., Miami Beach) with two "unhooked" shows on January 20th and 21st. Tickets are available here. Tiesto celebrated his 43rd birthday at New York's LAVO (39 East 58th Street)) last night.
4. The Nightlife Cultural Initiative is launching their first NYC Expo from April 5 to 7. They'll focus on venues, musicians, artists and fashion designers.
5. Chicago residents (and visitors) should check out the opening reception of "StuckUp" on Friday, January 20, 6 to 10 p.m., at Maxwell Colette Gallery (908 N. Ashland, Chicago). The traveling art exhibit ties-in with the Rizzoli book Stickers: From Punk Rock to Contemporary Art by DB Burkeman and Paper's Monica LoCascio. You can also download a free "StuckUp Stickers" iPhone app here.
6. The first New York City Metro Show, featuring over 35 art and design dealers, opens tomorrow, January 19th, at the Metropolitan Pavilion (125 West 18th Street). This new fair includes art, furniture, toys ceramics and more, PLUS it runs until January 22nd.
7. Jim Carrey looks VERY Nelson twin in the new Steve Carrell movie, Burt Wonderstone. [Buzzfeed]
New York Fashion Week's might be a few weeks away, but in Milan, Men's Fall 2012 fashion is well under-way. PAPERMAG photographer Pierguido Grassano hit the streets to bring you shots of all the handsome faces who are walking the runways in Italy this week.
Caveman at Bowery Ballroom with Au Palais and Heaven
The on-the-rise New York band whose sound is "equal parts chamber pop, dreamscape, and horror film score" plays alongside fellow New Yorkers Heaven and brother-sister duo Au Palais.
Bowery Ballroom, 6 Delancey St. 8 p.m. $13 advance, $15 day of show. Sold Out.
Life: Curated Warehouse Sale
Clothing, shoes and accessories from this extremely well-curated (duh) Williamsburg boutique are a whopping 50 to 80 percent off, starting today. We're talking goodies from the likes of VPL, Rebecca Minkoff, Mary Meyer, Rogan and Converse by John Varvatos. So get there early -- and note, the sale is not at said Williamsburg boutique, but at a showroom on Broadway.
Em Productions, 636 Broadway, nr. Bleecker St., Ste. 702; 10 a.m.-7 p.m.
Farewell Party for the Old American Can Factory
Avant-garde performances space ISSUE Project Room is headed to new digs on Livingston St. but before they leave, they're throwing down in their old space with the help of Swans co-founder, Jonathan Kane. The night will also feature a mix of "minimalist electronica, blues, indie rock and drone" from the likes of Talibam!, MV Carbon and Tony Conrad.