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All the posts on www.papermag.com.

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    The term "marathon" can drum up a lot of conflicted feelings. Running a marathon? Great. A huge, endorphin-boosting accomplishment that you can annoy your friends with by bringing it up at every possible turn. On the other hand, running is terrible: Shin splints, nipple tape, the high likelihood of publicly voiding your bladder. A Netflix marathon? Awesome. Cheesy snacks, curling up on the couch and once again finding yourself culturally current by binging on some series your friends are always talking about. And yet, you might still be hopelessly lonely and underemployed.

    So how about a music marathon?

    Depends on what we're talking about here. Spending three days at a festival quaffing beers, watching gorgeous people and maybe checking out a band or two? Usually a pretty good time. Dropping over $500 on a badge that lets you navigate your way through the 1,300 bands playing CMJ's Music Marathon in NYC this week? Daunting, exhausting, often ill-advised. But overpriced admission or no, there's ton of quality music (some of which don't require a badge) to be seen and it's best to come prepared. With that in mind, here are nine CMJ-related (both official and unofficial) acts and events worth going out of your way for. Good luck, and godspeed.


    Bombay Bicycle Club
    Suffice it to say that euphoric electronic-pop band Bombay Bicycle Club's So Long, See You Tomorrow didn't get enough burn this year. Released all the way back in February, the English foursome's fourth album is the musical equivalent of stumbling through a Holi festival during a semester abroad. Effusive, life-affirming stuff. For those looking to catch kids with Xs on their hands making out in the front row, look no further.
    10/22: Terminal 5, 610 W. 56th St., New York. Doors at 7pm, get tickets HERE


    Matthew Dear
    Matthew Dear playing a club named Verboten is about as on-the-nose as Aphex Twin playing a warehouse called Mx  '" oFFen9 {unit}, but it's advisable to look to Dear to help close-out your CMJ. While his dark, slinky electro-pop almost always translates into a rewarding live experience, keep your fingers crossed that he'll mix-in some of his material as Audion. He's releasing a new 12" under that alias on Kompakt in November, which he describes as highlighting "the more introspective moments on the dancefloor... without sacrificing one iota of the precisely engineered groove machinery that is Audion."
    10/25: Verboten, 54 N. 11th St., Brooklyn. 11pm, get tickets HERE


    Moon Duo
    Last month, drone-zoners Moon Duo released their first live recording Live in Ravenna, which captured Wooden Shjips member Ripley Johnson and Sanae Yamada stomping out some of their choicest psych tunes. Expect more of that all week long, and make an effort to catch them at the Sacred Bones showcase, where their label buddy Damon McMahon (who records simple, spiritual music as Amen Dunes) will also be on the bill.
    10/21: Stage 48, 605 W. 48th St., Manhattan. Doors at 8pm, get ticket HERE
    10/23: Bowery Ballroom, 6 Delancey St., New York. Sold Out.
    10/24: Trans-Pecos, 915 Wyckoff Ave., Ridgewood. Show at 8pm.
    10/25: Rough Trade, 64 N. 9th St., Brooklyn. Show at 7pm, get tickets HERE


    Protomartyr
    In a year filled with stellar punk and punk-ish releases (White Lung, Raspberry Bulbs, Perfect Pussy, Joyce Manor, United Nations, I could go on), Detroit's most literate and literal miserablists are running at the head of the pack. The ferocious, whip-smart Under Color of Official Right is one of 2014's finest releases. "Joe [Casey] is one of the best lead singers right now," Parquet Courts' Andrew Savage told SPIN of Protomartyr's show-stealing frontman. They're only on once this week, so do not miss.
    10/23: Knitting Factory, 361 Metropolitan Ave., Brookyn. Show at 8pm, get tickets HERE


    Saint Pepsi
    From the sunny minimalist laptop disco of last February's Bandcamp mini-album Gin City, to flipping a track from '90s emo favorites American Football, to dropping an impossibly funky edit of Drake's "Worst Behavior," Ryan DeRobertis' work as Saint Pepsi has been all over the damn place. That's a good thing. Now that the NYC musician has released a 7" single on the notable indie label Carpark Records (yes, the A-side takes its name from a Degrassi character and yes, it sounds like diet-Chic), now's the time to get familiar.
    10/22: Mercury Lounge, 217 E. Houston St., New York. Doors at 8:30pm, get tickets HERE.
    10/22: Output, 74 Wythe Ave., Brooklyn. Doors at 10pm, get tickets HERE


    Slowdive
    If you didn't get a chance to check out the UK shoegaze (and bowl-cut) pioneers this past summer on their reunion circuit (this past May, they played their first show in 20 years), now's your chance. Bonus: Slowcore indie rock vets Low are opening.
    10/25: Terminal 5, 610 W. 56th St., New York. Sold Out


    The Thurston Moore Band and PCPC
    Since the death of Sonic Youth, Thurston Moore has been a reliably busy guy. 2013 saw the release of his band Chelsea Light Moving's debut, and earlier this year, Moore's black metal supergroup Twilight released their third and final album. On the 21st, he'll be celebrating the release of his new solo album The Best Day, with fellow SY member Steve Shelley and My Bloody Valentine's Debbie Googe in tow as part of the Thurston Moore Band (both lend a hand on the record). Also showing up to party? Members of Sonic Youth acolytes Parquet Courts and PC Worship, who are joining forces as PCPC to kick things off.
    10/21, Saint Vitus Bar, 1120 Manhattan Ave., Brooklyn. Sold Out
    10/26, Rough Trade, 64 N. 9th St., Brooklyn. Show at 9pm, get tickets HERE


    Twin Peaks
    Come for the positive garage rock vibes from these Chicago young'ns, stay for the terrible Twin Peaks Season 3 jokes from everyone standing around you during their set.
    10/22: Glasslands, 289 Kent Ave., Brooklyn. Doors at 7:30pm, get tickets HERE
    10/23: Glasslands, 289 Kent Ave., Brooklyn. Doors at 7:30pm, no cover
    10/23: Rough Trade, 64 N. 9th St., Brooklyn. Show at 1pm, no cover
    10/23: Santos Party House, 96 Lafayette St., New York. 6pm. Sold Out
    10/24: Rough Trade, 64 N. 9th St., Brooklyn. Show at 8pm, get tickets
    HERE

    Bonus: If you're really up for the challenge of catching as much music as possible in a five day period, why not check out:

    Bands With Terrible Names
    Why subject yourself to this kind of thing? Because your significant other wants -- nay, needs -- a Vomitface t-shirt. Or a Spreaders shirt. A Shark Week shirt. A Robot Death Kites shirt. A Doprah t-shirt. A Me Chinese shirt. A King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard shirt AND blacklight poster. Or just get really meta and buy a bunch of merch from Strange Names.

    ...Or Just Go Watch People Talk
    Smart people (for the most part), too. Though you might have forgotten (or simply might not care), there are tons of great panels and discussions and meet-and-greets during CMJ. Head over to the NYU Kimmel Center and check out Jon Norris interview Zola Jesus (Thursday, 3:00), reflect on 25 years of the influential indie label Merge with founders (and Superchunk members) Laura Ballance and Mac McCaughan (Friday, 12:30), and ponder the legitimacy of the #emorevival (Thursday, 11:00am). Or just bag the whole thing and stay home and watch Netflix. Your call, New York.

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    Jenny Slate and Dean Fleischer-Camp's adorable, gravelly voiced, one-eyed, shoe-wearing shell, Marcel, is back with a new web video three years after we last heard from him. The couple timed the release of the new clip with the publication of their second Marcel-themed children's book, Marcel the Shell: The Most Surprised I've Ever Been, out tomorrow. In the video, above, Marcel melts our cold, bitchy hearts all over again with talk about his allergies, shrimp ("they're the idiots of the sea"), and learning a song at camp that reminds him of a friend who lives far away.

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    As it turns out, Shia LaBeouf isn't a full-on insane person -- he's just what happens when that annoyingly pretentious guy that you hated/dated in college gets famous. In a surprisingly earnest -- but no less maddening -- conversation with Interview magazine, the troubling actor hits all of the "White Guy Who Majored in [Humanities/Liberal Arts]" milestones.

    Smoking a cigarette, shirtless, Shia LaBeouf rattles off his Troubled White Guy Antiheroes that he looks up to, including Sean Penn, actual crazy guy Mel Gibson, and fellow pseudo-performance artist Joaquin Phoenix. LaBeouf also mentions and explains all the iterations of modernism that he has at one point subscribed to (post-, meta-), name-checks his existential crisis and subsequent coming to God, and discusses "tripping on drugs" and finding himself as he struggles to become an adult. The method actor also talks about how reading about performance art totally changed his life, for better or worse, and blames the avant-garde poet Kenneth Goldsmith for his penchant for plagiarizing -- or as he would call it, "uncreative writing."

    If you don't believe me, here, take a quick class in metamodernism from Professor LaBeouf without rolling your eyes:

    LaBEOUF: I'm going through it myself. I've been going through an existential crisis. If you look at my behavior, it's been motivated by a certain discourse. Metamodernism has influenced a lot of my action in the public in this last year and a half -- the idea of diametrically opposed ideas happening all at once: the irony and the sincerity, birth and death, the immediacy and the obsolescence.

    MITCHELL: Isn't metamodernism, though, basically saying that irony doesn't mean anything?

    LaBEOUF: No, it's definitely not. You have both modernist commitment and postmodern detachment -- sincerity with a wink. It is all things. It's a feeling that comes after deconstruction: the ripping apart, or the going to shit of a society, the environmental crisis, the financial crisis, the existential crisis. Metamodernism is the feeling that comes after that.  

    But to be fair, Shia LaBeouf does seem to have had a pretty rough go of life (he grew up in Echo Park "before it was cool"/gentrified) and has some major daddy issues -- which you can read all about in his very thorough defense of himself.


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    FKA Twigs released a short film that she directed and stars in, made with the help of Google Glass, aptly titled #throughglass. In the video, above, the singer and hair icon busts out some serious dance moves to re-scored versions of her songs "Video Girl" and "Glass & Patron." And despite Google Glass having the sex appeal of a Bluetooth headset for your entire face, FKA Twigs more than pulls it off.

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    6349338066937562506342916_9_GISW1_20130109_JIC_197.JPGImage via PatrickMcMullan.com

    BREAKING NEWS: Julian Casablancas is actually cool with brunch.



    Only a monster or a masochist would deny themselves the distinct pleasure of a Bloody Mary (in a mason jar, of course) and indulgent breakfast foods during an hour that is usually reserved for boring salads. Although he told GQ just last month that he fled the city because he "[didn't] know how many, like, white people having brunch I can deal with on a Saturday afternoon," Julian Casablancas is no monster. The Strokes frontman was only joking about hating New York's most beloved meal (and readily available excuse for day drinking), which he helpfully clarified, "for the record," in a Twitter rant. So if you stopped eating brunch because you feared that Julian Casablancas would take away your cool points, feel free to resume.


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    Screen Shot 2014-10-20 at 5.26.40 PM.pngClaire Christerson at Paper's 30th Anniversary, with two of your PrettyUgly hosts, Michael Bailey Gates and Hari Nef.

    Party veterans Erich Conrad and Paper's own Drew Elliott are launching a new weekly Saturday party, PrettyUgly at the glittering Diamond Horseshoe in the Paramount Hotel. Acting as Queen of the Night's late night sister, PrettyUgly is set for equal parts decadence and debauchery that brings together Brooklyn's art scene, the fashion set, and nightlife legends.

    Mikes Bailey-Gates, Max Ryder, Hari Nef, Nicky Ballinger, and Paul Iacono are set to host, while Becka Diamond and Tommy Hotpants DJ the night with an eclectic mix.

    PrettyUgly kicks off October 25th, doors at 11pm. Diamond Horseshoe, 235 West 46th St, NYC






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    With teen queen, Lorde holding the reins, the Hunger Games: Mockingjay, Part 1 soundtrack is bound to have some bangers. The first song that she previewed from the soundtrack was her moody solo contribution, "Yellow Flickr Beat." Now she's collaborated with The Chemical Brothers and Miguel to give us "This Is Not A Game." The explosive track originally debuted on BBC's Radio One and you can listen to the radio rip, below.





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    It was Snoop Dogg's birthday yesterday (HBD!) and in honor of the occasion, Jimmy Kimmel released the latest episode of the rapper's wildlife series, "Plizzanet Earth." In this installment we see him talk about snakes and bats. [via Jimmy Kimmel]

    tumblr_ndndr0p0iy1rn7bzro1_1280.jpgEasy enough to remember. [via Knusprig Titten Hitler]


    ICYMI: Drake shot a massive airball while warming up with the Kentucky basketball team... [via YouTube]

    drakeairball.pngAnd then Instagrammed this. Poor Drizzy :(

    screen-shot-2014-10-18-at-5-40-00-pm.pngTrent Reznor's high school yearbook photo is excellent. He looks like the he could've been the president of the Debate Society. [via Death + Taxes]


    Jiff the Pomeranian dances to Taylor Swift's "Shake It Off," is a better dancer than Taylor Swift. [via Tastefully Offensive]


    Jimmy Fallon and Bradley Cooper wore goofy visors and played some 'Egg Russian Roulette,' a game in which they smashed eggs on their heads not knowing which ones were cooked and which were raw. Shit gets real. [via Tonight Show]


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    iLoveMakonnen is the newest addition to Drake's OVO Sound. As a welcoming gift, perhaps, Drake remixed the Atlanta rapper's breakout hit, "Tuesday" and has now given the weekday anthem a video, above. The video for "Tuesday" features double Styrofoam cups, Drake's endearing dance moves, and everyday people singing the song's catchy hook.



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    AliceSmith.jpg

    Alice wears a CG top, Kalmanovich skirt and Sigerson Morrison shoes

    "Well, I've tried. I have tried and I have not succeeded." Alice Smith is attempting to answer the question, dreaded by most musicians, of how she would describe her sound. "I would say that it is very good, and I like it. That's the kind of music it is."

    Smith can be hard to pin down. Her favorite music ranges from Sade to Joan Jett, '80s rock to easy listening. She's worked as a major-label artist and a DIY bootstrapper. She's lived in New York and L.A. (not to mention D.C. and Augusta, Georgia). The one thread that runs through it all is her voice: an unforgettable, wide-range instrument and a vessel of heartstring-snapping lyrics.

    Smith's song "Dream" was nominated for a Grammy in 2007, while she had just one album, For Lovers, Dreamers & Me, under her belt. But Smith left Epic Records after her sophomore album was shelved. Six years and one daughter later, she released her bluesy, soulful second album, She, funded with $22,000 raised on Kickstarter. The album features her cover of CeeLo Green's "Fool For You," which she sings with raw, emotional certainty, like the song was meant for her.

    Smith doesn't plan on joining another major label. "It's not as much money to create the actual project, but it's also not as much headache and ridiculous conversations," she says. These days, she's making her rounds across the country (she played Afropunk earlier this year) and settling into the dizzying freedom of the independent artist. "Yes, it can be very overwhelming," she admits. "But it's better. Life is overwhelming; whatever." She's also gearing up to record her third studio album, which she plans to release next year. With the peaks and troughs of her career thus far, and the life-affirming challenges of motherhood, the album-to-be is already showing signs of being her best work yet.

    So maybe there's one other thread that runs through it all: an omnidirectional ambition to go along with Smith's ever-fluctuating life. Asked about her goals, she says, "The biggest thing you could think of, I would love to do that. Sold-out tours, sold-out shows. Big shows, little TV spots, Saturday Night Live and Sesame Street."

    Styled by Solange Franklin


    Hair by Chuck Amos for Oribe at Jump  / Makeup by Edward Cruz for Tom Ford Beauty at traceymattingly.com

    Photographer Assistant: Micaela Adams / Stylist Assistant: Kyle Hayes

    Location: Dune Studios


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    Men: If your sexts to random girls who you've met on Tinder include imagery that even Sasha Grey finds appalling, THIS IS YOUR INTERVENTION.

    Machinima ETC teamed up with Sasha Grey for the latest installment of their "Creepy Text Theatre" series. To promote her upcoming Internet-centric thriller, Open Windows, co-starring Elijah Wood, the former adult actress bravely reads through the worst of the worst dick-referencing pickup lines, above, and the results are hilarious.

    And men, for the record, any pun involving the word "Uranus" = NO.

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    Screen Shot 2014-10-21 at 1.28.52 PM.pngThere's a reason why cats aren't rappers. And that reason is because they're cats. As demonstrated by El-P's hilariously futile attempt to audition feline friends for the catastic remix of Run The Jewels 2, cats don't really like doing much of anything, outside of laying down and rubbing their butts up against things.

    In the video, below, El-P previews a few tracks for some of Brooklyn's finest shelter cats to spit on -- but most don't bite. While it's great that he's trying to get local, underground talent on the album, let's face it, most cats don't have what it takes to become Internet famous. Someone needs to start another Kickstarter to get Lil Bub on the Meow The Jewels, ASAP.




    [via MassAppeal]

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    Just six weeks until the opening of Art Basel Miami Beach! The 13th edition of the annual art fair -- and all it's satellite fairs, exhibits, museum and gallery openings (and parties) -- begins on Wednesday, December 3rd and runs through the 7th at the Miami Beach Convention Center.  The city's ambitious plan to build a new convention center has now been replaced with a simpler and cheaper "re-model," but that won't affect this year's fair or the expected 75,000+ international visitors.

    For 2014, ABMB launches a new sector called Survey, featuring "art-historical projects" from thirteen galleries including two rare "Tir-Assemblages" by Niki de Saint Phalle, outsider art by Henry Darger, mid-twentieth century works by the Brazilian artist Alfredo Volpe and more.  The original "sectors" will also return, including Nova, Positions and Kabinett; plus all the big outdoor, public art projects in Collins Park and the films in SoundScape Park and at the Colony Theatre on Lincoln Road.

    Due to an on-going fight between two factions of Miami's Museum of Contemporary Art (770 NE 125th Street, North Miami) several members of the museum's board resigned and started a new museum called the Institute of Contemporary Art in the Moore Building (4040 NE 2nd Avenue, Miami) in the Design District.  MOCA is still alive, and they're having an opening reception for an exhibition called "Shifting the Paradigm: The Art of George Edozie" featuring works by the Nigerian artist on December 2nd at 7 p.m.

    Buckminster-Fullers-Dome.jpgMeanwhile, the Design District is rapidly morphing into "the luxury fashion district" with an incredible transformation of the entire area still underway.  Lots of stores are already open including Prada, Marni, Rick Owens, Louis Vuitton, Hermes, Louboutin, Cartier, Celine, Pucci, Dior etc. and many more are on the way.  And there's a new "Palm Court" featuring a Buckminster Fuller dome, an enormous underground parking garage and plans for a condominium building to be designed by Chicago starchitect Jeanne Gang. You can follow the progress HERE.

    Screen Shot 2014-10-21 at 2.52.59 PM.png

    To take advantage of all the "luxury" in town for ABMB, The New York Times is hosting an "International Luxury Conference" at the Mandarian Oriental Hotel from December 1st to 3rd with guest speakers including Francois-Henri Pinault, Diane Von Furstenberg, Frida Giannini, Tom Sachs, Diego Della Valle and many more. Tickets are $4250.

    Screen Shot 2014-10-21 at 2.59.23 PM.png(The Edition hotel)

    The third edition of the SELECT art fair is making a bold move up to North Miami Beach where they plan to set up a 40,000 square-foot tent to hold over 50 galleries on the beach at 72nd Street. They'll also use the art deco amphitheater already on the site for installations, performances and exhibitions. Just a few blocks south at 67th Street and Collins Avenue, the NADA fair is back in the Deauville Beach Resort. The whole strip of Miami Beach from the W Hotel on 23rd Street up to the SoHo Beach House on 43rd Street is the hottest new, high-end real estate in town.  This year should see the opening of Ian Schrager's Miami Beach Edition  hotel (rooms are over $1,000 a night during ABMB) on 29th Street; and construction is also well under way at Alan Faena's massive $550-million hotel, condo and art museum complex at 32nd Street with buildings designed by Rem Koolhaus and Norman Foster.  If your budget won't cover any of these mid-beach, mega resorts, we suggest the super-cool and trendy Freehand Miami on 27th Street were a co-ed dorm room goes for around $115 per person a night.

    Screen Shot 2014-10-21 at 3.03.07 PM.pngPeter Marino

    The Bass Museum of Art (2100 Collins Ave., Miami Beach) will be celebrating their 50th anniversary with a big gala on November 1st and, during ABMB, they're planning an exhibition called "One Way: Peter Marino" curated by Jerome Sans.  Marino is a renowned American architect and designer and this show will include art from his private collection plus site-specific installations, an opera collaboration and a series of his bronze boxes.  The opening VIP reception is the evening of December 3rd and it will be open to the public from the 4th until March 29, 2015.

    James-Blake.jpg
    On Thursday, December 4th, the up-and coming UK singer FKA Twigs will be performing at YoungArts and on Friday,  December 5th, they've booked the Grammy-nominated and Mercury Prize winning recording artist James Blake. Tickets are available HERE. Last year, the National YoungArts Foundation debuted their new home in the old Bacardi building on Biscayne Boulevard and now they're moving ahead with plans to open a restaurant and performing arts space on the top floor called Ted's.  Philadelphia's Steven Starr Events will handle the food.



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    Gwen Stefani is baaack. Today she released the video for "Baby Don't Lie," her first official solo music video work in eight years since The Sweet Escape came out back in 06'. A spin on The Wizard of Oz, this trippy video, shot by Sophie Muller, shows Gwen strutting her stuff in a technicolor dreamworld with a posse of back-up dancers, veering back-and-forth between fantasy and reality. We hear the song will appear on Stefani's as-yet untitled third album, out Decemeber, and all we can say is welcome back, girl. Glad to have you back!


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    And you thought they were a one-hit-wonder. Well, Kids N Cats just released a video for their sophomore single "Vanilla" -- and we've gotta say it's just as freaky as their first. In fact, since they're singing in French, we haven't got a clue what the song is about and we don't care. We were hooked as soon as we spotted the purple mermaid alien and the golden goddess with one breast. Eat your heart out 3-breasted woman, we've found a better Halloween costume. Parental Advisory: This video contains several statue-fondling scenes they may not be suitable for children.

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    Our fair lady of comedy, Amy Sedaris is starring in PopSugar's first webseries Seriously Distracted. Set in the fictional office of Le Grande PR Firm, the series is set up for a whole host of hilarious workplace hijinks plot-lines. In the second episode, with some help from High Maintenance and Girls guest star Greta Lee, Sedaris embarks on a journey into the depths of Tinder. Surprisingly, Sedaris likes her men "to know their way around a GNC and my body." Gross, but in that case -- Amy Sedaris, say hello to Nick Jonas.

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    Even in middle school, Kim Kardashian knew that she was the "dopest of the ropest" and predestined for fame.

    The short clip from ET's archives, above, proves that Kim could never stay away from the camera's spotlight. In the most fabulous -- not to mention, prophetic -- moment ever, an 8th grade Kim Kardashian grabs the microphone and implores, "I hope you [get a tape of this] so you can see me when I'm famous and remember me as this beautiful little girl!" Yassss, you go girl.

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    Fact: Justin Bieber is taking boxing lessons from boxing champ Floyd Mayweather. Fact: Conan O'Brien obtained "exclusive" footage of Bieber and Mayweather's training sessions and, well, things aren't going so well for the Biebs. [Uproxx]


    Aziz Ansari and Grover teach you the word "ridiculous" and your heart explodes. [HuffPo]
     tumblr_nd7kifKlrH1s29jolo1_1280.jpgSweet. [FYouNoFMe]


    The Internet Gods are smiling down on us today: Gaze upon Dachsund's Creek: the all-dog reenactment of Dawson's Creek. [Uproxx]
     
    114F8.gifSlow clap for whoever made this. [Mlkshk]

    tumblr_ndiw10XU5a1s8ucbqo1_1280.jpgDorothy Parker quotes as motivational posters. [LaughterKey]



    A compilation of animals in Halloween costumes, YOU'RE WELCOME. [Uproxx]
     114EH.jpg

    Nuh-uh, no way. [Mlkshk]




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    Low Pros -- the collaborative project between trap producer, Lex Luger and EDM DJ, A-trak -- have offered up visuals for the track "100 Bottles" off of their debut EP. And to complete the powerhouse producer trifecta, Yeezus beatsmith Travi$ Scott lends his distorted vocals and stars in the trippy, futuristic video, above.

    [via Pitchfork]

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    While exhibits at the Met, MoMA or the Whitney might get most of the media attention -- and tourists' admission fees -- there's a slew of under-the-radar (and underrated) institutions scattered throughout New York City worth a visit. From a *very* impressive collection of trolls to a museum dedicated to animals from the torah, we round up ten hidden gems that should be on your shortlist the next time you want a dose off-beat culture.

    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.20.44 PM.png(photo by Isabel Alcantara)
    1. Mmuseumm

    This one's not much of a secret at this point, but Mmuseumm, located in a freight elevator in Tribeca, is home to some of the most interesting artifacts of the modern age. In an insanely small gallery space, allowing only three visitors at a time, the curators somehow manage to display an even tinier collection of cultural oddities. Mmuseumm's Season 3 exhibit includes the shoe thrown at George W. Bush in 2008, Saddam Hussein watches, plastic spoons, and fake ID cards. Maybe it's just the lack of oxygen in those cramped quarters, but after awhile, this assemblage of seemingly random objects seems to be telling a much bigger story.

    Mmuseumm is located at Cortlandt Alley, between Franklin St & White St, New York City, NY
    Suggested donation
    Open Saturday and Sunday, 12-6 pm


    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.23.54 PM.png(Photo via)

    2. Torah Animal World

    Torah Animal World might easily be one of the most unique places on earth. The Borough Park row house that has served as the museum's flagship location since 2008 began as a means for visitors (largely Hasidic Jewish families, visiting Christian and Amish bible groups, and curious hipsters) to get up close and personal with those animals prominently featured in the Old Testament. Spread across the museum's three locations are a multitude of beasts, frozen in time for all eternity, and valued at roughly 1.5 million dollars. The menagerie includes taxidermied camels, giraffes, bears, and much more, each with a plaque explaining its biblical significance. The pig, however, remains conspicuously absent.

    Torah Animal World is located at 1605 41st St., Brooklyn, NY
    Admission is $10 per person, per exhibit
    Open daily Sunday-Thursday  from 9:00 am to 9:00 pm by appointment only


    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.25.41 PM.png3. The Troll Museum

    Trigger warning: this one might send you straight to the nightmare factor. There are collections, there are museums, and then there are pathologies, and this one definitely leans towards the last. Founded in 2000, The Troll Museum can be found inside of an LES six floor walk-up apartment belonging to self-proclaimed "trollologist" Reverend Jen and her chihuahua, Reverend Jen Jr. The room is packed floor to ceiling with a technicolor swirl of vintage troll dolls and their memorabilia. It's a psychedelic trip you might never recover from.

    The Troll Musuem is located at 122-124 Orchard St #19, New York, NY
    Admission is free, however, a piggy bank reads, "Suggested donation: $3,000."
    Open by appointment only
    212-560-7235


    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.30.03 PM.png(Photo via)

    4. Morbid Anatomy Museum

    The Morbid Anatomy Museum, a Brooklyn-based, non-profit institution, has a thing for the all things gothic, beautiful and disturbing. Though known for their frequently sold out lectures on topics ranging from bejeweled skeletons to flesh-bound books, their exhibits are equally fascinating and macabre. The one currently on display analyzes the art of mourning, showcasing memento mori, including hair art and spirit photography. And make sure not to miss their monthly singles mixers!

    The Morbid Anatomy Museum is located at 424-A 3rd Avenue, Brooklyn, NY
    Admission is $10
    Open Wednesday - Sunday, 12-6pm
    347-799-1017


    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.31.06 PM.png(Photo via)

    5. The City Reliquary

    Located in Williamsburg, the City Reliquary looks like a little bodega on the outside but is in fact home to a treasury of artifacts all pertaining to the history of NYC. What started as just the window display of a ground-floor apartment in 2002 has now turned into a whole storefront overflowing with relics alongside community-curated exhibits, such as the current one celebrating all things chicken.

    The City Reliquary is located at 370 Metropolitan Ave, Brooklyn, NY
    Suggested donation
    Open Thursday - Sunday, 12-6pm
    718-782-4842


    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.34.24 PM.png(Photo via)

    6. The New York Earth Room

    What could be more fascinating than a white room in SoHo packed full of dirt? Ok, so maybe don't bring a first date to this one, but The New York Earth Room is still one of the city's greatest hidden treasures and a cultural landmark. The entire gallery is actually an installation by Walter De Maria that has been on exhibit since 1980. The room's 3,600 square feet of space is filled with a uniform layer of dirt 22-inches deep and is the last of the three De Maria works like it left in existence, maintained by the Dia Art Foundation.

    The New York Earth Room is located at 141 Wooster Street, New York, NY
    Admission is free
    Open Wednesday-Sunday, 12-6pm (closed from 3-3:30)

    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.36.15 PM.png
    (Photo by Librado Romero for The New York Times)

    7. The Trash Museum

    Though technically illegal, The Trash Museum of New York is, hilariously, situated in the heart of the UES. Providing a similar appeal to that of Mmuseumm, the Sanitation Department's collection of random junk provides a rare, voyeuristic glimpse into the lives of others. Inside the second floor of the garbage truck garage, you'll find an unbelievable assortment of neatly organized detritus accumulated by sanitation workers over the past 33 years. Good luck if you want to get into this one though -- admission is only granted to those authorized by the NYSD themselves.

    The Trash Museum is located on the second floor of the 99th Street Sanitation Department Garage, between 1st and 2nd Ave.
    Not open to the public


    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.41.06 PM.png(Photo via)

    8. The apartment museum of Jan Yoors

    Jan Yoors, a weaver from the '60s and '70s who hobnobbed with artists like Marc Chagall, Henri Cartier-Bresson and Yoko Ono, is still a relatively unknown name. But that might soon be changing. Over the past five years or so, the artist's estate, managed by his son Kore, has begun to receive international acclaim, with several solo shows throughout Europe and the US and even a write-up in the New York Times. But still the best collection of Yoors work can be found within the tapestry-laden walls of the family's apartment. Though not technically a museum, a quick email to Kore is likely to get your foot in the front door.

    Yoors Family Partnership is located at 22 Charles St. New York, NY
    Not open to the public
    917-523-5132
    Kore@janyoors.com


    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.46.08 PM.png(Photo by Jason Sapan via)

    9. Holographic Studios Inc.

    Located in a former blacksmith's forge in the basement of a Gramercy building on 26th Street is NYC's only holography gallery and laser laboratory. Started in the sixties by Jason Sapan, Holographic Studios Inc. is home to the world's largest collection of motion image holograms. Sapan has also been commissioned to digitize more than a few celebrities. Bummed you could never get a real life selfie with Andy Warhol? Sapan's got the next best thing.

    Holographic Studios Inc. is located at 240 East 26th St, New York, NY
    Admission is free
    Open Monday - Friday, 2 pm - 6 pm
    212-686-9397
    drlaser@holographer.com


    Screen Shot 2014-10-22 at 12.48.21 PM.png(Photo via)

    10. Museum of the American Gangster

    A place for those who never quite got over the end of The Sopranos, this two-room gangster memorial is located in the East Village above a former speakeasy. Though St. Mark's might not seem like the most logical of locations, that neighborhood was once a hotspot for wise guys like Al Capone, Lucky Luciano, and John Gotti. The Museum of the American Gangster boasts an impressive collection of mobster memorabilia, including bullets from the Saint Valentine's Day massacre and John Dillinger's death mask. If you ask nicely enough, they might even take you down into the basement's escape tunnels and show you the safe still hidden there.

    The Museum of the American Gangster is located at 78 St Marks Pl, New York, NY
    Open every day 1-6pm, except Sunday 10am-2pm, and closed Wednesday
    Admission is $10, Tours are $15
    212-228-5736



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