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    Electro-pop veterans Cut Copy released a new music video for "Meet Me In The House of Love," a track off their November album Free Your Mind, which is slated for a deluxe re-release on July 22nd. The video features Ben Sinclair, who you might recognized as the loveable bearded pot delivery guy from the web series "High Maintenance" (which he also co-created). His signature naïve-baby-meets-scraggly-Shaman looks make for a strange combination with the abandoned talk-show/concert backdrop of the video but somehow it all just works with Cut Copy's infectious Metronomy-meets-Duran Duran sound.

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    Following news earlier this week that the beautiful, androgynous model Andrej Pejić will be playing one of Ariel's sisters in Sofia Coppola's adaptation of The Little Mermaid, we decided to fill in the blanks of the missing cast members to create our fantasy oceanic fairytale. With the gender-bending Pejic as the only confirmed performer, Coppola's adaptation is sure to bring an unconventional, edgy and glamorous spin to the classic tale. Take a look at our dream cast, below.

    Sky Ferreira as Ariel:Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 2.45.49 PM.pngIf her Ariel-meets-Vegas-stripper wig in the "Night Time, My Time" music video isn't enough to prove that Sky Ferreira is aesthetically suited to the role, it seems like her entire discography was meant to be adapted into a Little Mermaid musical. Imagine Sky Ferreira on top of that ocean rock singing "Sad Dream," and then diving into the sea post-Prince Eric rejection, in Saint Laurent flippers and smudged eyeliner screaming "You're Not The One" at the top of her lungs.

    Jared Leto as Prince Eric:


    (Photo of Jared Leto by Clint Spaulding/

    What mermaid -- or human -- alike hasn't at one point succumbed to a guilt (or not so guilty) crush on Jared Leto? He's got those luscious long locks and whirlpool eyes but at the end he'll probably wind up ditching Ariel to be with Princess Lupita Nyong'o -- or because 30 Seconds To Mars is going on tour.

    Kathy Bates as Ursula:

    Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 2.41.59 PM.png The most obvious choice. Kathy Bates was terrifying as Madame LaLaurie in American Horror Story: Coven, painting her face with the blood of her tortured slaves among other horrific things, and with the right purple hue and ominous jazz hands, she would definitely kill as Ursula too.

    Robin Thicke and Terry Richardson as Ursula's Pet Eels:


    Miley Cyrus as Sebastian:Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 2.21.01 PM.pngMiley is SUCH a frisky crustacean.

    Morgan Freeman as King Triton:Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 3.18.47 PM.pngThe only actor with enough godly power and smooth seductiveness to play both Ariel's merman-daddy and king of the entire ocean is Morgan Freeman. He rocked the all-white suit as God in Bruce Almighty, and would be equally fierce wearing gold cuffs, a flowing beard, and a trident.

    Jonah Hill as Flounder:

    (Photo of Jonah Hill by Jimi Celeste/

    Aside from their shared baby cheeks, both Flounder and Jonah Hill make for epic wingmen. Flounder's extreme anxiousness and buffoonery throughout the Little Mermaid is just like Jonah in Superbad, right...? Also just imagine Jonah Hill swimming around in a striped yellow and blue onesie.

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    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 2.00.28 PM.pngKeith Haring jacket,1989. Paper archives.

    I will only interrupt my own tired rants about how much wilder and more fun New York City used to be in order to hear other people indulge in the same sort of ritualized kvetching. I feel it's imperative to support their grievances in order to keep the old-fogey genre alive. And they really outdid themselves last week at a presentation called New York Stories/'80s-'90s Edition. The invite itself was kvetchily irresistible: "Remember when New York City was a wonderland of fabulous freaks and misfit toys? When there were hookers instead of the Highline and you couldn't swing a Fiorucci jumpsuit without hitting a hopped up hustler? It's still our fabulous home, but behind all the TD banks and Bugaboo baby strollers are legendary tales. Everyone has a great New York Story. Come hear some of the best."

    The resulting event -- part of a series of retro bitchathons -- brought a packed house of survivors to Stonewall Inn, a place that could really tell some stories. It proved to be wonderfully bitter, varied, and rich, with lots of love for the pre-Chipotle days, though some speakers boldly suggested that the dangerous element back then made NYC less than consistently stellar. (There's mud in your rose-tinted glasses!)

    The host was wiry blonde comic Nora Burns, who remembered dancing at the legendary disco Studio 54, only to have musical oddity Tiny Tim pick her out of the crowd and decide that she should dance for him on his new tour. "That tour," she remembered, "involved us going to three discos in strip malls in Long Island, where Tiny Tim sang and I danced behind him. Behind the scenes, he brought cans of beans with him wherever he went." Still, the chance for a Lana-Turner-style opportunity, however small scale, seemed way more possible in old New York than today. "Beans!" to those who disagree.

    Agelessly good looking writer Tom Eubanks talked about some other long-forgotten availabilities back in the day. In fact, when Tom was rushed to St. Vincent's Hospital after getting hurt at an '80s outlaw party, no one blinked over the fact that he had no insurance. "And I never got a bill!" he added, incredulously.

    But some casualties were penalized in other ways, apparently. Wearing stylish shades, DJ Anita Sarko remembered a night at the Mudd Club -- the divey haven for rock hauteur in the then-wasteland of Tribeca -- when the overly festive Chrissie Hynde had to be held up by fellow rockers Johnny Thunders and Cheetah Chrome. Chrissie's publicist kept shrieking, "Don't judge her! This isn't what she's like!" whereas Sarko remembers onlookers saying, "We don't give a fuck about Chrissie. We're just in awe that Johnny Thunders and Cheetah Chrome are in an upright position." Coat checker Keith Haring (at the time an up-and-coming artist) later told Sarko that, faced with a stairway, Johnny and Cheetah simply let go of Chrissie and she went tumbling down, which led to a blood curdling yell heard for miles around. Ah, the good old days.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 2.03.12 PM.pngRuPaul, 1989. From Paper's 20 Years of Style.

    In that golden age, rock stars were allowed and even encouraged to be messy, as Lucy Sexton reminded us. Sporting her famous British bob, Sexton remembered cofounding Dancenoise with Anne Iobst in 1983, "though we couldn't decide if we were a punk band or a dance troupe. At one point in our first show, Annie took her scissors and started cutting the strings of my guitar. I kept playing. When Annie cut the last string, the show was over."

    But not her career. Sexton worked at the edgy Meat Packing restaurant Florent, where one night, a punk sleeping on his plate woke up and vomited his scrambled eggs all over the table. (She remembers a brilliant waiter magically scooping the puke up in seconds and making it disappear. Alas, she poignantly added, so did the waiter -- "from the plague" -- like so many others back then.) An even more amazing feat, said Sexton, happened at the Wigstock outdoor drag festival, when British performance artist Leigh Bowery "gave birth" to a naked woman covered in blood, then proceeded to imbibe her urine. Today, he'd probably just have to do a Katy Perry production number.

    Drag star Linda Simpson, looking as stately as a brunette Vanna White, recalled the early '90s Wigstock where a freshly famous RuPaul told the crowd that she used to be homeless in the park, "but now I own a condo overlookin' the fucker!"

    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 1.45.49 PM.pngSoHo, 1984. Paper archives.

    Grey-haired stage director David Schweizer talked about the endless sex that was available in the '70s, whereas curly-topped camp performer Brenda Bergman discussed the fascinating romantic rituals she had with her boyfriend. "We used to take syringes and squirt hydrogen peroxide at our genitals as a pre-prophylactic measure," said Brenda, still awestruck by her ingenuity.

    But she wanted to clear up some other old rumors. "Someone said they saw me in a Chanel suit, being serviced by some female," Brenda exclaimed. "I never had a Chanel suit!"

    As mature folk kept stepping to the stage, harsh truths unfurled about how back in the day, tattoo parlors were illegal, an East Village murderer boiled his dead girlfriend and served her parts to the homeless, and when you started getting near your low-income apartment, that's when you really needed to start worrying. But the event was basically misty eyed, funny, and very fond -- so much so that I'm already looking back to it and realizing things were so much better a few nights ago!

    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 2.02.42 PM.png
    A portrait of the artist as a young club kid, c. 1984. Paper archives.

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    world cup bracket-01.jpgFact: Soccer players are hotties and hotties are soccer players. And nowhere is there a greater concentration of baes than at the World Cup, when chiseled, stubbled, floppily coiffed players from 32 different countries converge on Brazil for a month. (As if they needed more hunks.)

    While we'll leave the incisive sports analysis to our friends over at ESPN, we've decided to make our own tournament bracket for -- that's right -- the 'Hottest Player In the World Cup.' We've picked the biggest cutie from each of the 32 different teams participating and, like the Cup itself, separated them into eight different groups with four players each. But because this is PAPER -- and not FIFA -- deciding the groups, we divided the guys into categories based on their prevailing hot dude features: Beards, Clean Shaven, Long Hair, Buzzed Heads, Metrosexuals, Tattoos, Williamsburg Haircut, and Hot Guy Next Door. Throughout the next month, we'll be pitting these guys head-to-head, perfectly-sculpted cheekbone-to-perfectly sculpted cheekbone and eliminating the competition until only one mega babe remains.

    Below, Round 1A:

    Group A:

    world cup bracket-03.jpg

    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 11.37.01 AM.pngNicolas N'Koulou (Defender for Cameroon) vs. Mario Yepes (Defender for Colombia)

    The Match: Nicolas has some amazing puppy dog eyes but male stripper Jesus is always a look that speaks to us.

    Winner: Mario.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 11.37.42 AM.pngGraham Zusi (Midfielder for U.S.) vs. Miiko Albornoz (Defender for Chile)

    The Match: The battle of the headbands. Miiko might have model looks but we can't shake his wealthy art scion douche chills. U-S-A, U-S-A.

    Winner: Graham.

    Group B:

    world cup bracket-06.jpg
    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 11.38.23 AM.pngAdam Kwarasey (Goalkeeper for Ghana) vs. Glen Johnson (Defender for England)

    The Match: Sorry Adam, this isn't really fair because Glen is 1000% hotter. We're sure you're really nice, though, and we'd still be honored to make out with you any time.

    Winner: Glen.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 11.39.06 AM.pngJerry Bengtson (Forward for Honduras) vs. (Vincent Enyeama, Goalkeeper for Nigeria)

    The Match: This one's hard. Jerry gets points deducted for tapered sideburns but you can't beat those cheekbones. Vincent, you've got the hotter name (Jerry???) and your brows don't quit. Ughhh why do we have to choose?

    Winner: Jerry.

    Group C:

    world cup bracket-07.jpg
    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 11.39.42 AM.pngCristiano Ronaldo (Forward for Portugal) vs. Hotaru Yamaguchi (Midfielder for Japan)

    The Match: This is hard but not for the reasons you'd expect. They both look like they'd say to a girlfriend, "Are you sure you want to eat that?" and they probably own hair products that are more expensive than your monthly rent.

    Winner: Cristiano.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 11.40.09 AM.pngNeymar (Forward for Brazil) vs. Eduardo (Forward for Croatia)

    The Match: Same as above but dumber. Just two hot dummies.

    Winner: Eduardo. (Sorry, Neymar. We just can't get past the double piercing.)

    Group D:

    world cup bracket-02.jpg
    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 11.40.40 AM.pngCarl Medjani (Defender for Algeria) vs. Ezequiel Lavezzi (Forward for Argentina)

    The Match: Ezequiel would make that face while you were having your baby in the delivery room. Everything with this guy is INTENSE AS SHIT. Carl has cool vibes.
    Winner: Carl.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 11.41.36 AM.pngTim Cahill, Forward for Australia vs. Claudio Marchisio (Midfielder for Italy)

    The Match: Tim looks friendly but Claudio's eyes are like two sparkling Lake Comos. If you look close enough, you'll even see a glimpse of a winking George Clooney in the pupil.

    Winner: Claudio.


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    bjorkmomaretrospective2.jpgGet excited, the Museum of Modern Art has announced plans for an entire Bjork retrospective in 2015, curated by MoMA chief curator and MoMA PS1 director Klaus Biesenbach. 

    It was only a matter of time before the museum, which hosted Marina Abramovic's groundbreaking show "The Artist is Present," and Tilda Swinton in a glass box, would team up with Bjork, the world's reigning queen of weird, and the show promises to be just as pop-culturally on point, with a unique 3-D "immersive music and film experience" to culminate the retrospective. 

    Last week, The Museum of Modern Art announced that it would be acquiring Icelandic musician Bjork's musical, graphic and interactive Biophilia App. It's the first and only app thus far in the museum's permanent collection.

    According to their press release, "The installation will present a narrative, both biographical and imaginatively fictitious, cowritten by Björk and the acclaimed Icelandic writer Sjón Sigurdsson." The show will span Bjork's 20-year career (36 if they count this!) and cover every form of her creative collaborations and works.

    We're really hoping the show includes ticket's to Bjork's island too. We want to go to there.


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  • 06/18/14--09:57: RL Grime: The Shapeshifter
  • rlgrime_edm_2.jpg

    RL Grime wears a coat and shirt by Burberry, pants by Hugo Boss, tie by Sand Copenhagen and belt by Emporio Armani.

    Henry Steinway is reading your comments. The trap and bass DJ/producer known as RL Grime admits to frequently scrolling through mentions on his social media accounts. It takes less than 30 minutes to upload a song to Soundcloud or YouTube, and little to no time for pseudo music critics and Internet trolls to leave their immediate thoughts. It's the music industry's form of instant gratification. "Everyone says 'don't read the comments, just put your music out there.' That's bullshit, it's so hard not to do." he said. "It's hard to deal with, but fuck, it's the Internet. Everyone is getting shit."

    And sometimes that's exactly what he gets -- from run-of-the-mill criticisms of his songs to  questionings of his entire music career -- though he's found a system for coping. "I stopped reading SoundCloud comments. I definitely will not read YouTube comments, those are my guidelines. Facebook can be nice. I think Twitter is the nicest social media because it's more of a person to person interaction," Steinway said.
    rlgrime_edm_1_new_1.jpgRL Grime wears a coat and shirt by Burberry, pants by Hugo Boss, tie by Sand Copenhagen and belt by Emporio Armani.

    But social media is also a way for the Los Angeles native to connect with his fans, and Steinway says it makes him happy that his music has the ability to resonate with people on a deeper level. In fact, positive feedback is how Steinway figured out producing was a path he should pursue when tracks, under his other alias Clockwork, started to get picked up by Dim Mak records and his videos were played at various festivals.

    "It's hard to tell when you first start what is really good and what's not," he said. "You sort of need validation from other people to know that."

    Now, the 23-year-old is more confident, and somewhat of a perfectionist. A stickler for simplicity, he knows when something is going to be a banger and when a track is better to sit for a re-work later. And with his upcoming album, to be released later this year, he's trying something new. Known for his heavy bass, trap-influenced tracks like his remix of Rihanna's "Pour It Up," and his collaboration with Problem on his track "Secondary" from his 2012 EP Beam, his debut album will have a mix of RL Grime's gritty signature sound intertwined with some more down-tempo, nebulous and melodic tunes.

    "I don't want to be pigeon-holed into just making whatever a trap album is supposed to sound like," Steinway said. "I just want it [the album] to stand in its own place, and venture into places that people haven't really done before."
    RL Grime wears a coat and shirt by Burberry, pants by Hugo Boss, tie by Sand Copenhagen and belt by Emporio Armani.

    RL Grime is a project that started simply because Steinway wanted to try a new sound, but, he says, it was never supposed to get this big. He made the first five tracks when he was stuck inside during a brisk winter week in his East Village apartment while he was a student at New York University, from which he later dropped out. He created the name RL Grime after joking around with his friends and talking about the author of his favorite childhood books, Goosebumps, R.L. Stine (who even did a voiceover for one of his Halloween mixtapes). Three years later, RL Grime is signed to Fool's Gold, a member of the LA music collective WeDidIt along with some of his closest friends Nick Melons and Shlohmo, released three EPs, has over 200,000 followers on SoundCloud and has been touring for two years consecutively.

    Under his other, older DJ/producer moniker Clockwork, which is currently signed to Steve Aoki's Dim Mak Records, Steinway produces more electronic, house/dance tracks. "Sometimes I'll sit down making a Clockwork song, then all of a sudden just want to take it in another direction, which is kind of the beauty in having two projects. There's a lot of freedom," said Steinway.

    For a guy who used to lug his turntables around to DJ house parties in high school and started out making MSTRKRFT rip-offs on Reason, Steinway is making quite a name (well, technically two) for himself. Growing up in LA, he used to attend Coachella and other big music festivals like Hard every year in high school hoping that could be him one day. This year he played two shows for Coachella, which he says will be his most memorable moment for a while. Though aside from wrapping up his album and picking artists he plans to feature, he's not sure what's next.

    "Maybe everyone could just fucking hate it, and everyone could unlike me on Facebook and I could go back to school. But, you never really know. I mean, right now, my only mindset is on the album and putting out a cohesive piece of work that I'm excited about. And we'll see where it goes from there."

    Styled by Art Conn

    Grooming by Traci Barrett for The Rex Agency using Davines

    Photo Assistant: Paris Potter / Shot at Quixote Studios in L.A.


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    Ryan Hemsworth wears a suit, shirt and tie by Marc Jacobs. 

    To get Ryan Hemsworth, you have to get his Twitter. Filled with hilarious, stream-of-consciousness non sequiturs and a pastiche of hip-hop lingo, half-serious emo talk and the kind of Internet-y slang 13-year-old girls use on Tumblr (where everything is all about "bbs" and "baes"), his 140-character posts range from "what was the best hug you had with a musician u love and tell me how it felt to u (I'm stuck in a van for 2 hours)" to "BOOTY HAD ME FEELIN vacant and lugubrious" and  "every mom apparently had a small afro at some point in their lives." Remarkably, this hodgepodge finds a way to come together to form a cohesive -- if off-beat -- feed. And it's in a similar vein that Hemsworth's music finds a way to deftly blend disparate voices and sounds into one fluid track. 

    The 23-year-old Toronto-by-way-of-Halifax producer first started producing beats five years ago while still a college student studying journalism. Since then, he's seen more and more fans and music critics alike gravitate towards his dark, ambient remixes of rap and R&B tracks and blissed-out original productions that often blend hip-hop beats with space-y, synth-heavy compositions and vocal loops. And already the first glimmers of mainstream success have appeared: his 2013 debut LP, Guilt Trips, won a Juno Award (Canada's version of the Grammys) for Electronic Album of the Year. 

    When considering his success, Hemsorth credits, in part, his association with the We Did It crew, a group of mostly LA-based DJs that also includes RL Grime and Shlohmo. "I think [being part of a crew] is a lot more important than I ever thought it was," Hemsworth says. "In terms of discovering music and making music, you can't get very far without friends helping you." In fact, it was while skipping his college graduation to open for Shlohmo at a show in Toronto that it first dawned on Hemsworth to pursue music more seriously. "Still to this day, I'm a fan of Shlohmo and RL Grime and even when we played SXSW together, I still felt like the little brother [of the group] even though we're all the same age," he says. 

    But just as important as his connections IRL are his connections online, the producer says. "I'm always on the computer, always talking to people that I know all around the world," Hemsworth says. "Facebook, Gmail, Twitter, and Tumblr are constantly open and I get inspiration from talking to people all the time. I always have people on Facebook that I talk to who send me stuff and say, 'Check this [song] out, it's great' and I can throw it into my DJ set." 

    Internet-enabled access to other producers and musicians all over the globe also makes it easier to pick up on the first grumblings of new movements or trends within dance music. At the moment, Hemsworth says one burgeoning trend he's particularly interested in is "this Japanese-influenced, maximalist, happy pop that a lot of producers in London are making right now." He predicts that "it's going to be a huge trend people are gonna jump on -- that and DJs actually playing instruments and doing more live shows." He adds, "I think everyone's kind of tired of the classic DJ set. And if they're not yet, they're gonna be in a year. Because everyone's doing the same thing." 

    You get the sense when talking to the young producer that he's ambivalent about whether or not he fits into the broader EDM community. He plays festivals and shares bills with some of EDM's big names like Skrillex and Diplo but his music, subtler and more ambient than the bass-throbbing stuff you'd find at Hakkasan or Pacha, stands apart. It's a result, Hemsworth says, of "not growing up on club shit" but rather on "white boy rock like Green Day and Bright Eyes and rap."  

    There are other ways that Hemsworth remains different from your typical 'EDM DJ,' the most prominent of which might be his persona. He consciously chooses not to adopt the Messianic posturing so common to many DJs behind the decks and, whether on Twitter or at a show, he often comes across as your goofy -- but insanely talented -- best friend from college instead.

    "I'll never be fully comfortable with the fact that when you play these [EDM] festivals, they put you on a pedestal like you're a god," he says. "Because you're really not. You're a dude on a laptop -- you're not that special. That whole thing is funny to me. I want to be on the same level as people in the audience, interacting with them, making eye contact, laughing with them." 

    In a scene known for grandiose displays and seven-figure paydays, it's not often that you find someone as chill and down-to-earth as Hemsworth. When asked how he's managed not to let the DJ lifestyle get to his head, he says it comes down to something very simple: "[DJing] stays cool to me." He adds, "I don't know if it'll ever not be cool to play a show for 600-1000 people who are paying to see me play music and are excited. I don't think I'll ever get over that. If that ever stopped being cool and I was like, 'Oh, yeah, I deserve all this,' that would be...weird."

    Styled by Timothy Reukauf

    Grooming by Xavier Soto

    Shot at Go Studios in New York


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    zedd_edm_1_new.jpgZedd wears a suit by Z Zegna, shirt by Dolce and Gabbana, tie by Hugo Boss, belt by Emporio Armani and shoes by Max Verre.

    In the current pantheon of EDM DJs, producers, and performers, few artists are moved -- let alone personally prepared -- to arrange their songs for the piano with a classical string accompaniment. For Zedd -- otherwise known as Anton Zaslavski, a 24-year-old German EDM purveyor and classically trained musician -- stripping down one of his bass-driven behemoths to its simplest elements seems downright natural. His US television debut on the Late Show with David Letterman in 2013 was an opportunity for the producer to perform his day-glo house rattling breakthrough hit "Clarity" unplugged. The performance had Zaslavski quietly sitting behind a piano while a string section swelled and a stadium-sized chorus got belted out by UK synth pop chanteuse Foxes. None of this is incidental. Zaslavski thinks EDM's reputation of being big, dumb, and loud overshadows the craftsmanship needed to make to make really good electronic pop music. He never really thought -- or cared -- about trying to give millennials on molly a good time; it was simply the side effect of his passions.

    "I think most people don't even understand how important songwriting is in the world of EDM," Zaslavski says. "When 'Clarity' finally came out, and it took about half a year to get big, it worked not because it had the sickest drops or the biggest kick drums. It worked because of the music, the melody, the lyrics, and the emotion was undeniable."

    The Letterman performance, along with the subsequent release of the acoustic version of "Clarity," was a telling moment for the baby faced German, who has always thought of himself as a songwriter first and EDM drop conjuring guru second. After playing in rock bands for most of his high school years, and growing up with classical musicians as parents, he was drawn to making electronic music in 2009 through the effervescent musicality of the pristinely arranged and gorgeously produced techno of Daft Punk's Discovery and Justice's . When it came time to write solo music, he became most drawn to the songwriting potential in electronic dance music.

    Zedd wears a jacket by Thom Browne, pants by Z Zegna, Belt by Emporio Armani, shoes by Max Verre and sunglasses by Ray-Ban.

    "I never wanted to DJ. I never wanted to become a DJ. I never thought I would become a DJ," Zaslavski says. "The core of my music is the music: the chords and the melody, not the sound. When you focus on the sound, as an electronic artist, you limit yourself severely from the beginning."

    Whether he wanted to or not, Zaslavski caught the EDM wave at the right time, gaining notoriety through winning Beatport remix contests -- competitions that weren't available to electronic musicians just a few years prior -- and catching the eye of Skrillex, who quickly signed him to his record label OWLSA. Soon, he found himself remixing tracks for big artists, like on the deluxe version of Lady Gaga's mammoth 2011 album Born This Way, and snagging an offer to release his debut album through Interscope in 2012. Clarity has been the record he's ridden ever since, with one single after another -- "Shave it Up," "Spectrum," "Stay the Night," and, of course, the album's titular track -- blowing up on dance charts across the world and quickly lumping him in with house music savant contemporaries like Deadmau5, David Guetta, and Tiësto. High profile production gigs for Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga followed.

    But as much as he's found success in the EDM space, to Zaslavski, the genre's popularity is both an opportunity and a house of cards, destined to crumble after trying to replicate the visceral pleasures of the drop over and over again.

    "If you go to festivals like Coachella, the electronic tents are always packed, and the energy is always insane," Zaslavski says. "DJs and producers figured out what works for the crowd, what gets them pumped what gets them jumping, so everyone started doing the exact same thing, because it was proven to get the crowd going crazy. Then you have every DJ at every stage is playing the exact same music because they now it's going to get them the same exact reaction."

    zedd_edm_2.jpgZedd wears a suit by Z Zegna, shirt by Dolce and Gabbana, tie by Hugo Boss, belt by Emporio Armani and shoes by Max Verre.

    He adds with a sigh, "the current state of EDM is very dangerous. It's in a comfort zone music should never be in...The formula is so pervasive -- the snare on the floor, the exact same sample -- kids don't even understand if you move away from it."

    Zaslavski knows the future of EDM lies in the potential for the genre to move beyond its fist pumping nadir and toward better songwriting, better melodies, and a more musically-oriented sonic wave. He cites Avicii, Calvin Harris, and DJ Snake of "Turn Down For What" fame as artists who are gaining acclaim and popularity while eschewing the typical EDM script, and he wants to encourage the next generation of DJs and producers to take the genre in radical new directions.

    "I hope people are going to be pushing away from the formula. Young DJs, artists, and producers feel like they have to make this tried and true sound, because they are worried people won't react or give you attention," said Zaslavski. "I think music should always come from the artist's heart, rather than basing it off what a lot of people have decided to like."

    Styled by Art Conn

    Grooming by Traci Barrett for The Rex Agency using Davines

    Stylist's Assistants: Artemis Jafari, Samantha Czubiak and Myda Noriega

    Photo assistant: Pedro Zalba / Shot at Quixote Studios in L.A.

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  • 06/18/14--15:40: Tiesto: The Trailblazer
  • tiesto_edm_1_new.jpgTiësto wears a suit and shirt by Saint Laurent, pin by Chanel and shoes by Givenchy.

    Tiësto's list of accolades runs long. First DJ to play a stadium (back in 2003, in Holland). First DJ to play the Olympics opening ceremony (in summer of 2004 at Athens). Grammy nominee. Repeated appearances on Forbes' annual top-earning DJs list -- you get the idea. But for a guy who pretty much invented the aughties notion of a superstar club DJ, elevating producers to unprecedented levels of fame and pay and paving the way for EDM's chart rise, Tiësto is quick to share the spotlight with his peers and mentees. His last album Kaleidoscope, an experiment in indie-dance music as the genre was reaching its peak in 2009, featured vocals from Tegan and Sara, Nelly Furtado, Bloc Party, and Sigur Rós's Jónsi -- one of Tiësto's favorite singers -- within earshot of each other. Five years later, Tiësto is letting collaborator friends like Icona Pop, Ladyhawke, and Matthew Koma take the vocal lead again on his recently-released A Town Called Paradise -- this time with a little more heart.

    "I wanted to make an album that's more song-based," the producer, born Tijs Michiel Verwest, says over the phone from Stockholm, a place he calls "his home base when he's in Europe" and also where he recorded parts of A Town Called Paradise; the rest was done in his Las Vegas studio. When he talks about the album, he stays committed to that idea, making sure to refer to the album's "songs" rather than tracks. "I never wrote songs before; I only did DJ sets," he explains. "So to really write songs, I had to listen to guitar melodies and think about how to express myself in the lyrics. It reflects who I am, what I stand for, and my lifestyle. It's closer to me than any other album I've done before."

    tiesto_edm_4.jpgTiësto wears a jacket by Alexander Wang, t-shirt by Mugler, jeans by Balmain, sunglasses by Giorgio Armani

    One of the tracks at the center of the album, both figuratively and literally, is "Wasted," a radio-primed slice of EDM pop that's one of the more personal songs within Tiësto's discography. Verwest wrote the song with Brooklyn singer-songwriter Matthew Koma, who he credits as "a big inspiration on the album." The song tackles an unhealthy relationship that only goes well when those involved are, like the title, wasted. On a sonic level, it also shows Tiësto experimenting even more with one of his favorite genres. "I always loved indie rock music and I think a song like 'Wasted' is me branching out to do something different," he says.

    It's not unexpected that Verwest veered more towards indie rock on this album. Not only did his last one have streaks of the genre but also in his down time, Verwest likes to unwind with the soothing melodies of indie kingpin Bon Iver. "It's so relaxing because my own music is so high energy and hard and wild," he says. "For me to chill out, I want to listen to the opposite like Bon Iver, a little bit of Drake, Sigur Rós, Jose Gonzales, those kinds of artists." I ask him if he's considered going in that direction with his own material. "In the far far future I would love to make a chill out album," he says. "I'm going to do that one day when I have enough time. But for now, I still love the energy in my songs, love to party and travel, and that's the sound I want to be making."

    Tiësto wears a suit and shirt by Saint Laurent, pin by Chanel and shoes by Givenchy.

    Tiësto has managed to keep the party alive for nearly two decades -- to the point where he's seen a completely new generation latch onto his souped-up dance music. "Some people grew with me and others just checked out and I got new fans to replace them," he says, alluding to the moment his trance sound evolved into more rock and pop-based club music with his 2007 album Elements of Life. "I would say 50% of my fans like the older stuff and 50% like the newer stuff. It's nice to see that I can influence older fans and newer ones. I have fans who are 12 years old and I have fans who are 60. It's funny to see them together partying at one of my shows."

    Like his audiences, Tiësto's dance peers span across multiple decades as well. Now he's mentoring a younger generation of dance producers, resurrecting the Dutch house music he grew up around. "It's absolutely amazing to see Martin Garrix and Oliver Heldens have number one hits," Tiësto says. "Oliver Heldens came to me with some songs and I told him, 'Do you have anything special?' And he said, 'I made this one for my dad because he's a big '90s house fan.' I heard the song, 'Gecko,' and was like, 'That's it. I want to sign that one.' Those guys call me for advice. I love to be in that world because they're the future of dance music."

    Styled by Art Conn 

    Grooming by Anny Kim at Walter Schupfer Management for Imperial Barber and Hourglass Cosmetics

    Photo assistant: Paris Potter / Shot at The Forge L.A.


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    Some dude proposed to his girlfriend at Bonnaroo and it's exactly the kind of marriage proposal you would hope would take place at Bonnaroo. May the rest of their days be filled with happiness, tank tops, and bubbles. [via Hyper Vocal]

    tumblr_n76pkortDl1rn7bzro1_500.jpgNa na, na na, na na, na na BAT MAN. [via Knusprig Titten Hitler]

    When in doubt, respond to unwanted Facbook sexts with Smashmouth lyrics. See the whole convo here. It's a masterpiece. [Uproxx]

    Screen shot 2014-06-19 at 12.01.18 AM.pngPitbull got an honorary bachelor's degree and all the haters can shove it. [via Uproxx]

    tumblr_mg860bX56k1rk49lyo1_500.jpgNot giving a fuck surprisingly sounds a lot like the ocean. [via F Yeah Dementia]

    Just Lil Mama and Barbra Streisand having a girls' lunch. [via 100 Years of Lolitude]

    Tarik and The Roots performed an awesome Harry Potter rap last night. Wanna download it on SoundCloud ASAP. [via Tonight Show]

    tumblr_n52nppEkfI1qdlh1io1_400.gifHappy Thursday! [via Trill Adam Clark]

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    Sondre Lerche's "Bad Law," one of our favorite upbeat breakup songs in a while, has a new video that might be all too painfully familiar to some viewers. Watch as Lerche, getting increasingly drunk at an otherwise low-key backyard party, gets a little too live, pulling down all of the decorations, trying, unsuccessfully, to dance with girls and then falling over and taking his shirt off. Fun times.  Lerche told Rolling Stone that the video is based on a real night he had last year, in which he let loose at a party and "was that guy." Check it out above. We can almost feel the hangover.

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    ryanhemsworth_edm_1_new.jpgIn our just-published profile on DJ Ryan Hemsworth (lookin' all schmancy in his Marc Jacobs suit) Hemsworth makes some predictions for new trends in dance music, including an increased interest in "this Japanese-influenced, maximalist, happy pop that a lot of producers in London are making right now. It's going to be a huge trend people are gonna jump on." In his latest track, we get a bit of that, wordless vocals from the Japanese singer Qrion overlay ethereal synths and a vigorous beat. It's more "lush, ambient music" than "maximalist pop" but the track's happy and uplifting nevertheless. Check it out, below, and peep our profile of Hemsworth HERE.

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    Following Terry Richardson's controversial New York magazine cover story this week, Lady Gaga is now in the news after clips from her shelved "Do What U Want" video, co-starring R. Kelly and directed by the notorious photographer, surfaced online via TMZ.

    As if the ARTPOP single wasn't already dripping with connotations of rape, the leaked clip  shows Gaga naked on a hospital bed while sexy nurses throw a party on her body after she's been sedated by Dr. Kelly. Later, Richardson makes a cameo shooting her as she rolls around naked on the ground surrounded by unflattering news headlines about herself. The video for the track, which she'd already started promoting in the fall, was wisely shelved by Gaga's team following an extensive Village Voice piece published late last year outlining the late-'90s sexual assault allegations against Kelly that involved teenage girls. According to Page Six, additional allegations against Richardson had also surfaced around the time, which, we're guessing, was the final nail in the coffin for this video. 

    Although the music video was never officially released, it's hard to conceive how it could have have been viewed as remotely appropriate. There was once a time when the singer opted for thoughtfully planned videos with complex storylines and otherworldly worldly, but it seems that once she consciously brought "art" into her "pop," Gaga's work began to lack less and less creativity.

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    Looking for a sweet little sound system for your crib? If you've got a couple of million dollars and an unused basketball court in the basement that you´d like to convert to a disco, we´ve got the perfect set-up. A gigantic system called Despacio is currently on the summer music festival circuit and when we heard it at SONAR last week, we were blown away by the crisp, clear sound quality. It is by far the best we´ve ever heard. It features seven 11-foot towers powered by McIntosh, the high-end audio equipment company based in Binghamton, New York, that put the whole thing together with John Klett after they were contacted by DFA records founder James Murphy, a  vintage audiophile equipment aficionado. Murphy and the Belgian brothers known as 2manydjs spun only vinyl in Barcelona for 6 hours each day and people lined up for hours for a chance to get into the 1,200 capacity room.

    We ran into McIntosh CEO Charlie Randall outside the venue and asked why the 65-year old electronics company wanted to power a disco at an EDM festival: "Actually this is the fourth time we´ve done it. We´ve already been to Manchester, England, twice in London and after Barcelona the system is heading to Glastonbury. The system even has a booking agent, William Morris. Usually our equipment is sold to an older demo and we wanted to expose a new generation to the brand. We´ve had between 20,000 and 30,000 people come through each day."

    The system uses three different models of McIntosh amps: twenty-eight MC 1.2Ks, each with 1200 watts; seven MC 452 stereo amps with 450 watts per channel; two MC 303 three channel amps with 300 watts per channel. It weighs about 20 tons and costs about $1.8 million including the speakers.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-19 at 9.52.33 PM.png

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    This just might be the both worst and best Weezer cover of all time. Poor buddies. (And, P.S., that is totally how we would have reacted, keyboard player/singer. Team Shrug and Stand There 4-LYFE.) [Jezebel]

    Paul Rudd feels the exact same way about the World Cup as you do. [Uproxx]

    Come on, who says cats are heartless, deceitful soul-bandits that will immediately eat your corpse if you die alone in your house? 

    This ref missed a handshake before the Spain-Chile match yesterday. A classically-uncool "head rub" recovery is made okay though, when it's laughed off by supernaturally-handsome Spanish captain Iker Casillas. [RyanFagan]

    4xJH4ui.jpg:'( [Reddit]

    No better start to the day than looking at a tiny hamster eating tiny spaghetti. [Reddit]

    Watch "The Future," a new Above Average web series starring stand-up Emily Heller. In this episode, she gives Olivia Wilde a lightening-round tarot card reading.

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    junglepussyqa.jpg(Photo by Luxx Photography)

    There's something special about 22-year-old New York City rapper Junglepussy. For starters, she stands nearly six-feet-tall and sports a head of bleached dreadlocks and then there's also her polarizing stage name. But it's her presence -- refreshingly genuine and completely enchanting -- that explains why she's an artist on the rise. When we meet at a small Brooklyn coffee shop, a woman stops our interview to congratulate Junglepussy on her just-released debut album, Satisfaction Guaranteed. "I'm a big fan," she tells the artist, smiling. Shocked and wide-eyed, the rapper shyly squeals with her hands hiding her face, like a little girl being told she's pretty for the first time on the playground. But despite this display, the artist has no trouble showing off lyrical bravado on her new album and it's this combination of fiery confidence while staying grounded that's bound to get listeners hooked. We talked to the self-proclaimed "life artist" about living in a tent in her backyard while working on her debut album, her West Indian roots, and that time Erykah Badu made her cry.

    How did you come up with the name Junglepussy?

    The name came about very innocently. I was never thinking, "How can I scare everyone away from me and my music?" I feel like it's my universe-given name and it fit me at the time because I was in love with animal print on cups, curtains and clothes.

    When did you first start making music?

    In high school, I was in a rap group with some other friends and we would cut class and fucking freestyle off instrumentals in the science lab and get in trouble. One day, someone told us to do the talent show and my friends [performed], but I was being wack in the audience. Now, I'm the only one who does music.

    Tell us about growing up in Brooklyn. How big of an influence is your parents' West Indian background?

    My dad is from Jamaica and my mom is from Trinidad. Growing up, everything was West Indian. My grandparents lived right by my family, so I was always over there eating the food and I became so accustomed to the [West Indian] music and culture. Even though we had American amenities, our lifestyle felt very tropical. I didn't have a regular American breakfast until high school prom night when I had my first pancakes.

    What was the recording process like for Satisfaction Guaranteed?

    I started the project with a very close friend of mine named Mell Masters. I used to love and steal his music during MySpace days and I was looking for somebody to let me be free lyrically. So I would go to Harlem and record with him and that's when we started "Bling Bling" and "Want Sum Mo," which was just a funny freestyle track. But then Mell Masters had to go away to the other side of America, so I took [the project] to the producer Shy Guy and we just whipped it up and polished it. It's really a fusion between Mell Masters' and Shy Guy's sounds. It was magic seeing it all happen and now I'm in shock that it's done.

    Which song off Satisfaction Guaranteed are you most proud of?

    The bonus track, "Me." It was the last song I recorded, which you can tell because I say, "Rest in peace Maya Angelou." I felt like I really needed to give the people a piece of me -- something I could listen to when I'm happy or sad. I don't listen to that much hip-hop surprisingly -- just a lot of jazz and ambient sounds, so I wanted this song to come from the soul. I pitched a tent in my backyard and was out there for a week straight -- sleeping and eating -- and the songwriting process was long and had a lot of paper scraps. When it came to me I was just like, "If this is not my heart and soul, I don't know what is." It's me, right now.

    What is your songwriting process like?

    When I'm on the train, it's one of the most serene moments -- sometimes, if it's not fucking rush hour. But I get in that moment and just look at the buildings and the clouds passing by. My mind is free and the words just come to me. My feelings are racing and everything comes out like a fountain.

    Who are you most influenced by?

    Brandy definitely made me feel less alone. Growing up, I would see Brandy on Moesha and see her keeping in her cornrows and her braids, but still flourish in her art and music, looking fly. I loved Moesha as a child, but now I take away something more special from it. Just because you're a black girl, it doesn't mean you need to only care about hair and makeup. Brandy cared about books, culture and where she was going -- you can do both. Also, Erykah Badu is an angel to this earth. When she posted my first music video for "Cream Team" onto her Facebook and Twitter, I cried that day. I didn't expect her to know I existed, let alone respect what I'm doing enough to post it. But if anybody knew the truth they would know that I copy everything from my mother -- she's the best woman I know.

    What is the best advice you've ever received?

    Resort back to your childhood state, not in the sense of being immature, but in the sense of remembering all the things that originally made you happy or sad. When you wanted something as a child, you'd cut it out, beg your parents and save your money. Children have such passion and the intentions are so pure. Sometimes when I stare at people, I imagine them as a child and see them shine so much brighter. I remember my childhood and feeling amazing, but then it gets dark. I guess that happened so I could see the light again, but I feel like that happens to everyone.

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    Image 2 - Donna.jpgWatching Jenny Slate nail the role of the endearingly flailing twentysomething/aspiring stand-up Donna Stern in Obvious Child (out now), you'd be forgiven for thinking the actress has a lot in common with her character IRL. But one look at Slate's bona fides -- recurring roles on Parks & Rec and Kroll Show and a season SNL -- and it's clear that, unlike Donna, she's really got her act together. Here, we talk to Slate about poop humor, puberty, and her dad's 'Wang' nightgown.

    How did you first start acting?

    Stand-up is actually how I got into it. I didn't want to move to L.A. There are so many acting classes that are scams out there -- it's like, "If you sign up for this class, you'll meet a casting director." They all seemed crazy and I felt like I'd be lost out there. So Gabe [Liedman], my best friend, and I started doing stand-up, which seemed like the best way to perform. So, yeah, I've been doing it since I was 22. I used to perform four times a week in New York but now that I finally do live in L.A. and I work more, it's a little bit harder.

    Did you ever make any huge or embarrassing mistakes in your twenties like your character Donna?

    I've had a lot of drunken nights but I've never had an experience like Donna did bringing home a guy in a dorky way. I'm a serial monogamist. Since I could have a boyfriend, I've always just wanted to have a boyfriend. But in my 20s, the most regrettable things were the dumb jobs I did. There are jobs, like those Vh1 panel shows, that I look back on and I'm like, "Oh god, that was not good."

    Why is that?

    It's because you have people telling you what to say. They don't trust you or don't know you well enough to let you do your own jokes. I'm sure there are some people allowed to do their own jokes but when I was there, I was just saying whatever they told me to say and I didn't know enough to be like, 'That's not funny. I don't want to say that.' The things I regret most are any jokes that are pure snark. I don't think straight-up snark is funny and I don't love it when people go for low-hanging fruit in comedy. It sucks to make fun of people who are already down and out. I remember when I was doing it, it was when Britney Spears had shaved her head and when all of those actresses showed their pussies by mistake.

    Like in 2007.

    Yea. It was so weird and suddenly like, 'Everyone's vagina is here! Here they all are! No one is wearing underwear!' Recounting that time when everyone's vagina was out is funny but sitting there at the time and having someone who isn't a comedian telling you to make a joke about how Britney Spear's naked vagina looks is really regrettable and horrible and not something one woman should do to another woman. Especially when I look back on it and realize that she was on the verge of, like, a nervous breakdown. Those thing kill me. It makes me feel like shit. It's not like I wake up every day and perform a crazy self-flagellation for doing those things but I hate being known for them and don't like that they're plastered all over my IMDB page.

    How would you describe the types of jokes and humor you gravitate towards?

    I think the perfect stand-up set for me is when people laugh but also feel a little bit like I was in their head. In a good way. My vibe is very much to not make fun of people.

    You're a nice comic.

    I think so. But maybe not so nice to myself. I'm always teetering between self-love and self-punishment. I love anything that reminds people that I'm alive in the most vacant sense. I just think anything to do with the body and its functions are both really funny and really mysterious. I think poop humor is kind of a delicate art. You have to do it with finesse. There's a million different ways to make a fart noise and some of them are funny and some of them aren't.

    Are there any topics that you find yourself returning to again and again?

    I didn't hit puberty until I was, like, 17 so I love to talk about that -- how before you hit puberty, you have this growing, really urgent sense of horniness. I've had that since I was really young and it's just built and built and built. I feel now, even as a married woman, I feel a real grabbiness about sex and boobs and about being able to French kiss. There was such a long time where I knew I didn't have anybody to kiss. That killed me. I was so horny and lonely for so long. I could get up onstage and talk about that for three hours. It's not painful but it clearly made a mark.

    Any others?

    I like to talk about my parents and my childhood. Both of them are artists and really interesting, unique people. The stories from my childhood don't need to be zhushed up at all. I talk a lot about how for much of my childhood, my dad slept in a long nightown type of thing. Also my mom is a Raku potter, which means that part of the process of making the pottery is taking the porcelain pottery she's made and wrapping it in newspaper and setting it on fire in a barrel, which is illegal. She would do it in the woods near our house so nobody would see it but she caught the woods on fire so many times. My parents would have to run outside in the middle of the night with buckets, both throwing out their shoulders trying to put the fire out.

    So my parents decided to make a pottery studio in the attic but they got into a fight with our contractor and a hole in the roof never got fixed and all these bats from the woods would fly in and wake my sisters and I up and freak us out. My dad would come out in his nightgown with an old Great Gatsby-style tennis racquet and swat the bats against the walls of our house. And my dad's nightgown said 'Wang' on it because that was the name of the computer company he worked at in the early '80s and would get covered in bat blood. These were just things I was used to. I was like, 'Yeah, my dad sleeps in a long, bloody nightgown that says 'Wang' on it. What does your dad sleep in?' Eventually my mom made my dad's nightgown into a rag and he was so devastated. We tried to replace it but he was like, 'Nothing will ever replace my Wang.' It was just so sad.

    Obvious Child is out now.

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    Most Life-changing Safety Demonstration:
    This one. Flight attendants typically show passengers how to fasten their seat belts with a blank face, as the entire cabin avoids eye contact and turns up their iPhone volume. This man, however, demanded undivided attention with lines like, "That seatbelt needs to be low and tight across your hips just like the hot pink speedo I'm going to be wearing when I finally get the three of us to a hotel hot tub." Slightly disturbing, but so amazing. -- Justin Moran

    Worst Way to Spend $35 Million: Buying this Star Trek-themed mansion. (Unless you're the person who already bought this house, in which case I apologize, and hope you enjoy your dream home.) -- Kate Ramsay

    Screen Shot 2014-06-20 at 4.13.22 PM.pngMost Exciting Pre-Pride Party In NYC: SHADE's big extravaganza this Saturday in a secret Bushwick warehouse. A press release states that "the sheer size and artistic daring of the lights and sound installation will eclipse everything they have done to date." There'll be reps from different club nights on-hand to recreate their parties: NYC's 11:11, XTAPUSSY, GAG, Shock Value, Dizzyland, Bathsaltz, Misster, Club YES, Good Kids, Ova The Rainbow, and Witches of Bushwick. DJs from all over the country will take turns on the decks and highlights include FATHERHOOD (SHADE, 11:11, NYC and Berlin), Jackie House & Josh Cheon (Honey Soundsystem, SF), Harry Cross & Jpeg (Men's Room, Chicago), and Ryan Smith (WRECKED, NYC). For more info head HERE. -- Abby Schreiber

    Screen Shot 2014-06-20 at 3.38.08 PM.pngThe Dumbest App That We Need -- Immediately: 'Yo' the app, which allows you to 'yo' your friends. That's it, yo. Just 'yo'. It already has 1 million dollars from investors...Yo. -- Maggie Dolan

    Criminalhottie.jpgBest Use of Photoshop: The Internet's most desired convict looks even more eye-catching dawning one of Lady Gaga's bubblegum pink wigs. "Cause you're a criminal as long as you're mine, I want your love..." Sorry, but we had to. -- J.M.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-20 at 10.55.25 AM.pngScreen Shot 2014-06-20 at 10.59.13 AM.pngScreen Shot 2014-06-20 at 11.03.16 AM.pngScreen Shot 2014-06-20 at 11.04.34 AM.pngScreen Shot 2014-06-20 at 11.19.58 AM.pngAnd, Speaking Of Which, the Best (Worst?) FB Comments About Dreamy Convict:
    See above. Yikes. -- A.S.

    Most Likely to Succeed:
    Pop newcomer Ferras is the first official signee to Katy Perry's new record label, and the result is impeccable. Subtly sexy and flooded with '80s synths, "Speak In Tongues" is begging to be the anthem for a romantic summer fling. -- J.M.

    Worst Reason To Go To The UK (But We're Putting it On Our List Of Things To Do In Britain Anyway):
    British McDonald's. Here's a clip of a bunch of Americans sampling McDonald's 'American-themed' special menu items found only in the the UK. -- K.R. 

    Screen Shot 2014-06-20 at 3.58.02 PM.png
    Most Important Summer Staple: Bobby Abley's Ursula pullover. If you're anything like me, you grew up dreaming of the day you'd wake up as an overweight octopus with incredible makeup in the coolest underwater dungeon. This is the closest we'll ever get to that fantasy. -- J.M.

    Best Music Cover of the Week: Sam Smith's beautiful, haunting rendition of Whitney Houston's "How Will I Know." -- A.S.
    Most Amazing Performance You May Have Missed This Week: Paper Nightlife Award Winner Contessa Stuto gave an aggressive performance of "Reign In Ratchet" at Melissa Burns' Club Yes. party at Le Bain this past Wednesday. "If you're on the roof right now, you're not fucking from New York," she screamed before finishing the guitar-trap single completely topless. -- J.M.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-20 at 3.58.22 PM.pngThe Most Emotional Menswear Runway (Thus Far): Craig Green's solo debut in London. The Fashion East graduate showed by himself for the first time and his creative meditation on 'zen' and 'purity' had front rowers in tears. The Cult of Craig is coming! -- M.D.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-20 at 4.16.30 PM.pngLeast Sexy Sex Toy: Teddy Love, the teddy bear sex toy that "provides pleasure through dual, vibrating mechanisms in Teddy's nose and tongue." It's gotta be the first sex toy that's guaranteed to completely destroy your sex life. -- J.M.

    Best Courtney Love interview of the Week: Never, ever a dull interview, Mariah Carey BFF Courtney Love was interviewed in a Google Hangout by Noah Levy of Vh1's The Gossip Table and they talked about it all: Lindsay Lohan, addiction, celebrity, Cameron Diaz saying she didn't set out to be famous (yet totally setting out to be famous). Love it when Courtney dishes like this. --Elizabeth Thompson

    Screen Shot 2014-06-20 at 4.01.58 PM.png
    Best Selfie 2.0: Susan Sarandon shared the film still of her and Geena Davis taking a selfie in Thelma and Louise with a reunited version on her Facebook page this week and it's glorious. Look at their skin! -- M.D.

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    A baby named Leon discovers his eyebrows in the mirror and it's just delightful. Your Monday antidote. [DailyDot]
    Dejected USA fans during Portugal's bullshit last-second goal yesterday. Sad trombone forever.

    If Jurassic Park actually starred a tubby bulldog named Wally. [DailyDot]

    ZG9D.jpgTeam Fat.[Mlkshk]

      Just a squirrel named Marky Mark who comes when his name is called, NO BIG DEAL. [Uproxx]
    Pearl Jam performs "Let It Go" at some concert because, sure, fine. [TastefullyOffensive]

    ZFVM.jpgKate and Willie look weird. [Mlkshk]

    ZFX0.jpgThis week's motto. Thank you, TP. [Mlkshk]

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